AN: Sorry, sorry, SORRY it took me so long, peoples! *hugs everyone* I've watched Blue's Clues since it was new, so I have it memorized. XD But I don't have cable at home ._. so I don't watch Dora or anything all that much… Do you know that there aren't ANY Dora transcripts online? I've been looking for months. I just now today got a chance to see an episode, and scribbled down notes that I can't read now. So if this is only vaguely like the show, I'm sorry. Also- the Japanese used in this chapter (No SPANISH! HA!) is either bummed offa friends or taken from the 1942 version of Japanese in Thirty Hours so sorry if it's not all that wonderful. I'm terrible at Japanese. *bows* forgive, forgive. OKAY! KITCHEL! *waves flags*

~Ellabel

PS- ever notice the odd looks people give you when you ask for the Japanese for "We did it!"? And apparently I can't find Japanese for "explorer" either, so "Exploradora" just turns into "Explorer Kitchel". Forgive.

***

Cesia stared as Kitchel and Chibi Thatz swung across the screen on vines, ate lots of food, and dodged random demons. She tried but was unable to shut out the sounds of Kitchel, Thatz, and unseen children singing exuberantly.

"K-K-K-K-K-Kitchel! K-K-K-K-K-Kitchel! Kitchel Kitchel Kitchel the Explorer! Thatz and super-cool Explorer Kitchel! K-K-K-K-K-Kitchel! K-K-K-K-K-Kitchel! Let's go! Jump in! You can lead the way-ay! HEY HEY! 'Donna, no swiping! 'Donna, no swiping!"

Cesia stared as a demon she took to be Ekidonna tore off his headband, stomped, and cried "aww, man!"

"KITCHEL THE EXPLORER!" shrieked the children, in case Cesia had forgotten. Kitchel and Thatz bounced to the front of the screen, winking and flashing the peace sign. PEACE! PEACE!

"Ohayo! Watakushi wa Kitchel desu!"

"And I'm Thatz!"

"Do you like fairy tales?" Kitchel leaned over to ask Cesia with a knowing wink.

"Oh, I love fairy tales! Especially when there's treasure involved!" Thatz shrieked, with dollar signs for eyes.

"^^ I have a book, " continued Kitchel sweetly while casually kicking Thatz, "with a fairy tale in it!"

"OOH! Does it have treasure!?" caroled Thatz. Cesia winced as Kitchel slapped Thatz upside the head with something that looked suspiciously like a manga. "Uh, I mean, read it to me! Please?"

"In Japanese, Baka! The book speaks Japanese!"

"O…onegai?"

"Onegai!" repeated Kitchel. She stared into Cesia's eyes. "Can you say 'onegai'?" She paused expectantly. "Say 'onegai'!" Pause. "Onegai!" Apparently satisfied, Kitchel opened the manga, revealing a handsome picture of Thatz on the cover.

"Once upon a time, there was a great king loved by everyone. But to keep his people safe, he needed the three treasures-"

"TREASURES!? What are we waiting for!? Let's go!"

"But Thatz…" Kitchel hissed through her grin, " That's not in the script!"

"So!?"

"The script, Thatz!" wailed Kitchel piteously.

"The treasure, Kitchel!" stated Thatz persuasively.

Kitchel paused, apparently thinking hard. "Aw, heck." she finally said, tossing the book over her shoulder. "Let's go!"

"That's my girl! How do we get there?"

"We need to ask the map!"

"WELL, ASK IT!!!"

"Calm down, fool!" Kitchel turned to the camera, her sparkling shoujo eyes glinting irresistibly. "Will you help us?" She paused. "Great! You need to say 'map'!"

Thatz jumped up and down maniacally. "SAY MAP! SAY MAP!" he shrieked.

"I said, calm DOWN!" roared Kitchel, slamming Thatz with a boulder. She then calmly and innocently took the map off her neck. The map swirled around and opened up, clinging to the screen.

To Cesia's horror, it grew a face and began to sing.

"Who's the guy you need to know when you've got somewhere to go? I'm the map! Who's the guy who can say 'I can help you find the way'? I'm the map! I'm the map I'm the map if there's a place you gotta go I can help you there, I know, I'm the map! I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map. I'm the map, I'm the map, I'M THE MAP!

"Ohayo! so, we need to find the way to the treasures so we can tell Kitchel. Do you see the treasures?" Among a childish scrawl of images, Cesia noted three boxes representing chests in one corner. She recoiled in shock as a random blue arrow came out of nowhere and stabbed them maniacally.

"CUT!" screamed a voice. The screen froze. "WHO LET ELLABEL HAVE THE MOUSE AGAIN!?" There were screams and wails and ripping noises as a certain random elf was dragged away from the computer room. "Take 42!" sighed a harried voice, and the map commenced flapping. A blue arrow serenely clicked once and then disappeared. After blinking, the map resumed. "There! How do we get to the treasures? Luwa, island, cave! Say it with me! Luwa, island, cave! Luwa, island, cave! Luwa, island, cave!" Laughing madly, the map swirled away into the background as a bouncy Kitchel and a bandaged Thatz reacquired the screen.

"Where do we need to go?" asked Kitchel. As the unseen children answered, scrawled pictures of the places filled the bottom of the screen. "Luwa, island, cave." Kitchel repeated it. "Luwa, island, cave. Hora! So, where do we go first? Doko?" She paused. "Luwa, right! We're going to Luwa to get a boat so we can go to the island! Let's go! Come on, kyuukyo! Everybody, let's go! Come on, lets get to it, I know that we can do it!"

After jogging across the screen, Kitchel and Thatz found a little faerie tied to a tree.

"Help!" squeaked the faerie. "Help me, onegai!"

"Hey!" observed Thatz. "You're stuck!"

"Yes, you idiot!" snarled the faerie, also known as Ringleys. "GET ME OUT OF HERE, GENIUS!"

"Oh, how can we get him out?" angsted Kitchel. "Maybe there will be something in my backpack! You have to say 'backpack'. Say 'backpack'!"

Cesia pointedly was silent. She was more prepared this time as the backpack swirled into the screen and began a song of its own.

"Backpack! Backpack! Backpack! Backpack! I'm the backpack loaded up with things and knickknacks too! If there's something that you need I've got it here for you. Backpack! Backpack! Backpack! Backpack!" Several items came out of the backpack, which was giving Cesia a glazed-eyed look of bliss. Cesia barely had time to wonder how a backpack could manage a glazed-eyed look of bliss before

it asked her, "What can Kitchel use to free Ringleys?" The picture of forks started to glow. "Can she use fooku?" From somewhere offscreen, Thatz's lonely voice ventured a "yes?" His voice was covered by the unseen children's "NO!" Then the pair of scissors glowed. "Can she use hasami?" "YES!"

The scissors danced as the backpack ate the other items with a disturbing "YUMYUMYUMYUMYUM!" and zoomed off. Kitchel grabbed the scissors before Thatz could and faced Cesia again. "I need YOUR help to cut the net! Make the scissors with your fingers, and … snip, snip, snip, snip, snip!" The net fell away as Ringleys flew to glomp Kitchel's face. "HI! welcome to Luwa! THANK YOU FOR SAVING ME, ARIGATOU!"

"We're in Luwa!" sang Kitchel. Three random chibi dragons ran across the screen and trumpeted.

"We need to find a boat so we can get to the island!"

"Gosh, I hope Ekidonna doesn't come around!"

"THATZ, YOU MORON, OF COURSE HE'LL COME NOW!"

It seemed Kitchel was right, for with an eerie giggle, Ekidonna came hopping into view behind them. Not noticing him, Thatz paused to instruct Cesia. "If you see Ekidonna, just say ''Donna, no swiping!' Can you do that?"

As Cesia rolled her eyes in despair, Kitchel eyed Thatz oddly. Then she turned to see Ekidonna mincing up behind them. Thatz started babbling religiously "'Donna, no swiping!"

Kitchel arched her brow. "We're to do this the entire episode?"

"The script, Kitchel" reminded Thatz.

"… screw that!" Kitchel squished Ekidonna with a boulder once and for all. Thatz watched, amazed, as Fire pranced across the screen with a placard reading "aww, man!"

"Oh, my! You killed the evil demon! Allow us to give you a boat!" cried the thankful Luwans. Because apparently if you live in Luwa, you are a Luwan. Ellabel Said So.

"We have a boat! Arigatou!" Kitchel and Thatz and Ringleys got in the boat and chugged across to an island. The boat didn't fall apart because this is a children's show and children might be frightened by the boat breaking up.

"We're on an island! Now where do we go next?" Kitchel paused. "The cave! Hora! Can you say 'hora'? Say 'hora'!"

At that, Thatz accidentally dropped the aqua balls on the ground, opening the cave.

"Wow, Thatz, " said Kitchel wonderingly. "You actually did something right!" She picked up the treasures. "How many are there? Let's count!" She pointed to each one in turn. "ichi, ni, san! Three treasures! Good counting!"

Kitchel gathered Thatz, the Luwans, the dragons, and Ringleys around her as they began to dance and sing, "We did it! We did it! Koodori, we did it! We found the three treasures, we did it! We did it! We did it! HOORAY!" Giggling, everyone else left, leaving only Kitchel and Thatz. They smiled at Cesia, beckoning her closer.

"We had such a fun trip today!" enthused Kitchel. "What was your favorite part?" she asked Cesia.

Cesia sat there with tears streaming down her face. "I CAN FEEL MY IQ DROPPING!"

"I liked that part too!" beamed Kitchel.

"My favorite part was when we got the treasure!" flailed Thatz.

"Hey, that's MY favorite part! YOU STOLE MY PART!"

"… Thief…" said Thatz, pointing at himself. Kitchel roared, grabbing the camera and beating Thatz with it. The TV hurriedly cut to Nadil's head, who was looking very upset.

"Ohayo!" chortled Head. "Wasn't that fun? Kharl the Chemist is up next, followed by Fairly Oddparents and Dragon Tales!"

Cesia moaned in despair, vowing to do terrible things to Rath when he should happen to return and release her from her torment.

AN- Thank you for reading, and sorry again for it taking so long and then being crappy. Just for future reference, the author is known for stabbing things maniacally with a mouse. And no, you're not crazy, there were references to The Princess Bride and to Pirates of the Caribbean. Can you find them? *dances off laughing wildly*