Scene Thirteen (Now, we see Jimagorn in the halls of the House of Noelrond. It is night, and the moonlight streams into the windows. Jimagorn is leaning against a pillar, contently reading a book entitled, How To Live Your Life In Exile and Be Happy. Then, we see Mikomir enter the halls, at first not seeing Jimagorn. Mikomir looks at a painting of Robsildur cutting the Movie off from Jauron's neck. Then, he looks at Jimagorn, who looks up and smiles)

Mikomir: (In a friendly tone, straightening his glasses) You don't look like an Elf.

Jimagorn: (With a sarcastic smile and tone) Nice job spotting that.

Mikomir: (Shrugs and smiles, missing the insult) I pride myself on it. (Looks at Jimagorn for a moment and raises his eyebrow) It is not usual to see a Man in the House of Noelrond.

Jimagorn: (Smiling simply) Friends of friends are welcome.

Mikomir: (Nodding) Ah. (Still stares at Jimagorn, who closes the book) Who are you, anyways?

Jimagorn: (Smiling) I am a friend of Kendalf, the old but extremely attractive.

Mikomir: (Putting his hands in his pockets as he nods in understanding) Ah. I met Bob Dylan once. (Awkwardly looks over towards a statue of an Elven woman bearing a tray. Slowly, he walks over to the statue, and the camera shows the broken sword of Narsil. He gasps in surprise and wonderment) The blades of Narsil! (We see him grab the handle of the sword and hold it up with pride) The blade that cut the Movie from the neck of Jauron! (Begins to run a finger along the blade) Incredible. (Gasps in pain as he cuts himself) Hmm, maybe I shouldn't have done that. (Looks down at his cut finger and smiles slightly) Still sharp.

(Mikomir looks over to Jimagorn, who opens the book and begins to read again. He looks at the handle he holds and scolds angrily)

Mikomir: But nothing but a broken blade!

(Mikomir drops the sword and walks off. The camera follows the handle as it hits the ground. We see Mikomir stop before the exit, glance over at the handle, but walk off. Jimagorn stares after him, closes the book again, and sets it on the floor. He gets up, walks over to where the blade has fallen, picks it up, and carefully puts it back on the tray, bowing his head)

Jimagorn: (In a low voice) Believe me-all of us are not that stupid.

(Once Jimagorn has placed the handle back on the tray, he steps back, touching his chest and looking at the statue. Then, we see Narwen walk up behind him gracefully, wearing beautiful white robes)

Narwen: (In a concerned tone) Why do you fear the past?

Jimagorn: (His face working into a look of fear) Because it's scary-full of mayhem-and no hair gel!

Narwen: (In a reassuring voice) You are Robsildur's heir-not Robsildur himself.

Jimagorn: (Looking at the statue, a distant look upon his face) The same blood runs through my veins. (Turns around and faces Narwen) Believe me, Narwen! I've had medical checks! I have AB negative-and so did Robsildur! That's a rare blood, Narwen-too rare to be coincidence. I am destined for the same fate!

Narwen: (Grasping his hands with comfort and giving him a comforting stare) Your time will come! You will be faced with the same evil-and you will defeat it. This shadow does not pass over us. Not over you-not over me.

(We see Jimagorn and Narwen in the gardens, standing facing one another on a bridge. They are holding hands)

Narwen: (In a reminiscing voice) Remember when we met?

Jimagorn: (In a content voice) Of course. (Face pulls into a look of fear as he remembers something) Wait a moment! Is today our anniversary?

Narwen: (Looks at Jimagorn angrily) No!

Jimagorn: (Letting out a breath of relief) Oh! That's good. I mean-(Sees the angry look on Narwen's face and speaks in a lovelorn tone) Oh, drat! I've been really looking forward to it!

Narwen: (Looking past this as she touches Jimagorn's face lovingly) You were a different person then. You did not have the fears you carry now.

Jimagorn: (Touches her hand) Yeah-I was kind of an idiot back then.

Narwen: (Looking up at him) Do you remember what I told you?

Jimagorn: (Face goes into a look of contentment as he recites) Yes-"Get the heck away from me, you weirdo".

Narwen: (Angry) No! The other thing!

Jimagorn: (Suddenly remembering and his eyes go wide) Oh yeah! You said you would-bind yourself to me-seeking a mortal life.

Narwen: (Smiling as she looks into Jimagorn's eyes) And to that, I hold, for I would rather spend one lifetime with you-than the rest of the lifetimes of this world alone.

(Narwen takes off the Evenstar pendant she wears, and puts it gracefully into Jimagorn's hand)

Narwen: I choose-a mortal life.

Jimagorn: (Looking down at the jewel and then back at Narwen with a disbelieving stare) You cannot give me this!

Narwen: (The same smile playing upon her face) It is mine to give to whomever I wish to-like my heart.

Jimagorn: (Looking concerned at Narwen) But-what about your father?

Narwen: (Rolls her eyes) Uh-Jimagorn-my father has known you for years and he still thinks we're friends. Besides (Smiling mischievously) if he does find out, who cares?

Jimagorn: (Eyes go wide as he speaks) I care! If Noelrond found out about this he'd kill me! And I don't know about you, but I kind of steered clear of that path long ago. I would like to uh-(Thinks for a moment) not die.

Narwen: (Looking into Jimagorn's worried eyes) As long as I have it within my power-that will not happen.

Jimagorn: (Gives her a sly look) You're so sexy when you're tough. Now I know why I love you.

Narwen: (In a sly voice) Kiss me, heir of Gondor!

(Camera goes back and shows Jimagorn and Narwen kissing. Then, we go to the next day, to the Council of Noelrond. We see Noelrond speaking seriously, looking around at the council as he talks)

Noelrond: Evil has awoken from Mordor again. There is no hope in stopping it-you cannot avoid it. Everybody is bound to this one evil-this one force!

Kendalf: (To Lizzo Baggins in a low voice) Well, that's very depressing!

Noelrond: It will be up to you to decide what is to come. (Looks over to his right) Lizzo.

(We see Lizzo Baggins, who is sitting next to Kendalf, look up anxiously)

Noelrond: .bring forth the Movie.

(Lizzo Baggins looks at Kendalf, who nods and puts a hand on her shoulder to encourage her. Lizzo Baggins stands up and slowly walks to a stone table in the center of the council. Slowly, she pulls out the Movie and puts it gently upon the table. The camera fixes itself upon the Movie, resting peacefully on the surface. We hear many members of the council gasp in wonderment. Then, we hear a clicking sound of somebody taking a picture. We hear Noelrond speak)

Noelrond: (Sternly) Sir, no pictures, please.

Photographer: (In an embarrassed tone) Sorry.

(We then see Mikomir looking at the Movie, with a sudden look of longing)

Mikomir: (In an audible whisper) So it is true.

(Everybody-Megolas, Brimli, Kendalf, Lizzo Baggins, Jimagorn, and Noelrond- look at Mikomir, who gets to his feet and is still looking at the Movie. Jimagorn, who is standing away slightly from the group, is staring at Mikomir with mounting distrust)

Mikomir: (In a far-off voice) So it is true? Of all my years, I never thought-But it is so! All of the lore and teachings have not been in vain, after all! It is true! The Movie exists-(Goes off on his impressed view of the Movie)

(We suddenly see Noelrond's face, which is looking at Mikomir, and we hear his thoughts)

Voice of Noelrond: (Thoughts very annoyed) There he goes again! Saying that mumbo-jumbo that nobody really understands anyways! Good Lord, he's boring! But I'm just gonna nod my head and pretend I understand. Yeah, that sounds good.

(We see Lizzo Baggins, who looks a bit anxious, and we hear her thoughts)

Voice of Lizzo Baggins: (Her thoughts more concerned as she looks at Kendalf) I wonder what Kendalf's thinking-he's had to live through so much, you know. He's lived through much more horrible stuff than me.

(We see Kendalf, who is listening to Mikomir with a stone expression on his face, and we hear his thoughts)

Voice of Kendalf: (Thoughts in a cheery tone) I could really go for some potato chips.

(We go back to Noelrond, who is speaking sternly to Mikomir)

Noelrond: Whatever you are getting at, Mikomir, I suggest you stop right now. Remember that this Movie is a Movie of evil-a Movie of Mordor.

Mikomir: (Shaking his head) It is a gift! (In a desperate, convincing tone) This Movie has gotten into our grasp-we have it now! Why not use this Movie against Jauron? It could give us great aid!

Megolas: (Looks at Mikomir suspiciously) Wait a moment! Wasn't it Men who got us into this whole mess, anyways?

Mikomir: (In a dismissive tone) And, on behalf of Men everywhere, I apologize for that! (Looking around at the council) Have you all forgotten exactly what Gondor has done for you? For years we have shed the blood of countless individuals-all of your lands kept safe! Gondor could use this Movie to craft a defense against Jauron-one more powerful than he can imagine.

Jimagorn: (Looking at Mikomir seriously) You cannot wield it! None of us can!

(Mikomir glares at him, but Jimagorn continues)

Jimagorn: The Movie was crafted by Jauron alone-it has only one master. It answers to nobody else-it knows nobody else.

Mikomir: (Coming up to Jimagorn and speaking with a mocking tone) Oh, really? And what would a Ranger know of such matters?

(Before Jimagorn can even think of replying, Megolas is standing up and glaring at Mikomir)

Megolas: (Speaking angrily as she speaks) This is no mere Ranger you speak to!

(Mikomir looks at her quickly)

Megolas: (Pridefully) He is Jimagorn! Son of Jimathorn!

Mikomir: (Eyebrows raise skeptically) Jimagorn?

Megolas: (Obviously infuriated) An heir to the throne of Gondor!

(We see Jimagorn put a hand over his eyes, rubbing them in frustration. Megolas looks at Jimagorn, shrugs, and looks sorry)

Megolas: (In a far calmer tone) Sorry, Jimagorn-I had to say something.

Jimagorn: (In a frustrated tone) Sit down, Megolas.

(Megolas sits down and Mikomir is looking at Jimagorn with a mocking smile)

Mikomir: (Speaking to Jimagorn in a seething voice) An heir to Gondor, hmm? (Laughs) There is no king in Gondor. (Glares at Jimagorn as he goes to sit down) Gondor needs no king.

(Mikomir sits back down, occasionally glancing at Jimagorn, who looks ashamed of something. We go suddenly to Kendalf as he speaks)

Kendalf: (In a hopeless tone) Jimagorn is right-we cannot use it.(Angrily) thanks a lot, Jimagorn!

Jimagorn: (Shocked) What?

Noelrond: (Camera shows his serious face as he speaks) Then we have only one choice: the Movie must be destroyed.

(We see Lizzo Baggins look at Noelrond nervously, and then we see Brimli look at the Movie, a fierce fury building in her face)

Brimli: (In a growling type voice) What're we waiting for, then?

(Before anybody can stop her, Brimli is on her feet, raising the axe. With a fierce shout, she brings it down on the stone table-making to destroy the Movie by chopping it apart. But the axe suddenly shatters and Brimli is thrown back. At that moment, we go to Lizzo Baggins' face, which looks terrified as the Eye of Jauron flashes on screen. Lizzo Baggins winces at the sight of the eye, and clenches her hands in fear. Kendalf looks at her worriedly. We then see Brimli get up and look at the stone table. The camera shows pieces of axe on the table-but the Movie is still in perfect shape. We see Brimli looking at it with narrow eyes)

Brimli: (Angrily) Oh, so that's how it is, eh? Let's see how ya like the Knife of Balin!

(Brimli pulls out a long knife and brings it down upon the Movie, but it bounds back up towards her, because the Movie is not affected. Lizzo Baggins winces again as she sees the Eye of Jauron again. Brimli's face pulls into a look of puzzlement and she hits the movie repeatedly. Lizzo Baggins starts screaming as Brimli does this, and finally she shouts out angrily)

Lizzo Baggins: WILL YOU STOP ALREADY! I THINK WE GOT THE POINT!

(Brimli stops and looks towards Noelrond as he speaks)

Noelrond: (Camera shows his face looking serious) The Movie cannot be destroyed by any craft that we have here. The Movie must be taken to Mordor and tossed into the Cracks of Doom in the center of Mount Doom. Then-and only then-will the Movie be destroyed. (Face brightens up and he rubs his hands together) Right then-any volunteers?

(The camera shows the council sitting still, many looking at one another in a mixture of fear and wonder. Finally, we see Mikomir take off his glasses and rub his eyes in concentration as he speaks)

Mikomir: (In a simple voice) Nobody simply walks into Mordor.

Jimagorn: (Puts up a finger and speaks brightly) Well, they do, but they usually end up dying-or turning into Orcs.

Mikomir: (Putting his glasses on and looking around at the council) There is an evil in Mordor that does not sleep. (Puts his fingers into an O shape) A great eye-

(Lizzo Baggins suddenly looks up with fear)

Mikomir: .watches over the land-lidless and writhed in flame. (He puts his hand down and speaks with great hopelessness) There is no way that we can cross into that land and come back out again. (With a laugh, he starts shaking his head) It is folly.

(We see Megolas stand up angrily and look at Mikomir)

Megolas: (Angrily) Hey, moron! Have you heard nothing of what Noelrond has said? (Looks about at the council and sounds desperate) The Movie must be destroyed!

(We see Brimli look up at Megolas furiously)

Brimli: (In an angry voice, causing Megolas to look down at her) And I suppose you think that you're the one to do it?

Megolas: (Thinking for a while before angrily speaking to the Dwarf) Well-I didn't think that at first-but now that it comes to it, maybe I am, shorty!

Brimli: (Fury burning in her eyes) "Shorty"?

(We see Mikomir pleading to the council)

Mikomir: Anything that goes in Mordor stays in Mordor-that's the way it is and it always will be!

(We see Brimli glaring at Megolas)

Brimli: (Shouting to the council) I WOULD RATHER BE DEAD THAN SEE SOMETHING OF SUCH IMPORTANCE IN THE HANDS OF AN ELF!

(Everybody-except for Lizzo Baggins and Kendalf-begin to argue with each other: Megolas with Brimli and Mikomir with Jimagorn)

Megolas: (In a mocking tone) Dwarves suck!

Brimli: (Spitting back) Elves bite!

Megolas: Dwarves smell!

Brimli: Elves smell worse!

(We see Mikomir prodding a finger into Jimagorn's chest-egging him onto a fight)

Mikomir: (In a mocking tone) What the heck is with your hair, Jimagorn? It looks ridiculous!

Jimagorn: (In a warning voice) You can say anything you want about me but leave the hair out of this!

(Kendalf gets up and moves towards the arguing council, leaving Lizzo Baggins to sit alone)

Kendalf: (Shouting angrily) You idiots! While you bicker and fight Jauron is in his tower making plans against us! YOU'LL ALL BE DESTROYED!

(But the council remains arguing, and the voices fade out as we see Lizzo Baggins looking at the Movie. The camera shows the movie, which has flames in the disc and is hissing evilly. The camera goes back to Lizzo Baggins, who is watching in horror)

Lizzo Baggins: (In a small voice) That's-not-good.

(As the voices of the bickering councilmen are heard again, Lizzo Baggins looks up and suddenly pulls on a look of determinations-she knows what she has to do now. Quickly, she stands up)

Lizzo Baggins: (In a desperate tone, and shouting) I will take it!

(But the council doesn't hear her, arguing too loudly. We see Megolas holding up Brimli by her throat. Kendalf is angrily speaking to Megolas)

Kendalf: (In an angry tone) Megolas, put Brimli down!

Megolas: (Glaring at Brimli) Not till she takes back what she said about my mama!

Brimli: (In a strangled angry voice) Never!

Lizzo Baggins: (Shouts again to try and be heard) I will take it!

(Still, nobody hears her)

Megolas: (Tightening her grip on Brimli's neck) Take it back!

Brimli: (In an even more strangled voice) Ne-ver!

(Finally, Lizzo Baggins loses her patience)

Lizzo Baggins: (Camera shows her face pull into a furious look as she shouts hysterically to the council) HEY! WHY DON'T YOU JUST SHUT UP, TURN AROUND, AND FREAKIN' LISTEN TO WHAT I HAVE TO SAY, DAMN IT!

(Everybody turns to look at the furious hobbit with surprised looks upon their faces. Finally, Megolas releases Brimli from her grasp. The camera shows Lizzo Baggins as she speaks more calmly)

Lizzo Baggins: I will take the Movie to Mordor! Though-(She looks off to the side awkwardly) I don't know the way.

(We see Kendalf smiling and walking up to Lizzo Baggins. Once near to her, he puts a hand on her shoulder)

Kendalf: (In a reassuring voice) Then, I will go with you, Lizzo-and offer any aid that I can.

(Lizzo Baggins smiles up at Kendalf, and Jimagorn comes up to Lizzo Baggins as well. He kneels before her and takes her hand)

Jimagorn: (In a friendly tone) And I will go too-considering I have nothing better to do. You shall have my sword.

(Lizzo Baggins smiles at Jimagorn. Then, we see Megolas come up to Lizzo Baggins with a determined look)

Megolas: And you shall have my bow!

(Brimli follows Megolas)

Brimli: (In a determined voice as well) And my axe!

(Both of them stand behind Lizzo Baggins, who smiles at both of them. Then, Mikomir comes over to Lizzo Baggins with a determined look as well)

Mikomir: (With his nose in the air with pride) And you shall have my severe paranoia and my desire to burn things!

Lizzo Baggins: (Frowns at Mikomir) Why would I want that?

Mikomir: (Scowling at Lizzo Baggins) Well, why the heck would you want Jimagorn's sword, Megolas' bow, and Brimli's axe?

(Suddenly, we see a bush behind where Lizzo Baggins was sitting shutter and Kram Gamgee pokes her head up from it)

Kram Gamgee: (Looking a bit angered) HEY!

(Kram Gamgee runs out from behind the bush and next to Lizzo Baggins)

Kram Gamgee: (Folds her arms indignantly) Lizzo's goin' nowhere without me!

Noelrond: (With a bit of a smile as he looks at Kram Gamgee) I see it impossible to separate you-even when she is summoned to a secret council and you are not.

Kram Gamgee: (Looking up indignantly) Hey! I wasn't eavesdropping! I was gardening! And I'll have you know that your fallin' leaf problem has reduced your gamekeeper to tears!

(We see Rippin Took and Jessie Brandybuck poke their heads out from the entrance to the council. They look at one another once, and then both run towards the council)

Rippin Took: (Shouting) Hey! We're idiots!

Jessie Brandybuck: (Shouting as well) We're going too!

(Both of them run next to Lizzo Baggins, who is smiling fondly at both of them)

Jessie Brandybuck: (To Noelrond) You'd have to send us home tied up in a sack in order to keep us from Lizzo!

Rippin Took: (Indignantly to Noelrond) And we already checked-you're out of sacks!

Noelrond: (A bit agitated with this turn of events) Why do you two even care? This could have less concern towards you!

Rippin Took: (A bit appalled by this question) Lizzo's been our friend for years! It's gonna take a lot more than this to keep us from her!

Noelrond: (Smiling slightly) You guys don't know the way back to the Shire, do you?

Rippin Took: (Shaking her head) Not a damn clue. (Camera closes in on her face as she speaks with dignity) Besides, you need people of great intelligence upon this sort of mission.quest.thing.(Smiles and nods) shindig!

(Everyone looks at Rippin Took, who looks quite satisfied)

Jessie Brandybuck: (In a sarcastic voice) Well that rules you out, Rip!

Rippin Took: (Looks at Jessie Brandybuck in an angry way) You want me to cut you, Jessie? 'Cause I'll cut ya!

(We see Noelrond smile fondly at the company)

Noelrond: (In a solemn tone) Nine people to go. Let it be so. You will be the Fellowship-of the Movie! (Suddenly smiles) Hey! Just like the title of this movie! (Points up, where the title of the movie is displayed in great golden letters)

(We see Tom Selleck suddenly)

Tom Selleck: (In a proud voice, smiling) And I'll go too!

Rippin Took: (Runs towards Tom Selleck, with a look of great wonderment upon her face) Oh my God! It's Tom Selleck!

Tom Selleck: (Nodding and smiling still) Yes-wait a moment. (Looks down at Rippin Took) This is the casting place for Runaway Two, right?

Rippin Took: (Shaking her head and frowning) No-this is Fellowship of the Movie. (Points out the door) You want the room down the hall and to the left-next to the water cooler.

Tom Selleck: (Looks at Rippin Took for a while) Oh-well, bye then. (Smiles at the council once more and turns around and walks away)

(Jessie Brandybuck, her mouth open in shock, goes up to Rippin Took and starts smacking her. Rippin Took covers her head and exclaims in pain for a while)

Jessie Brandybuck: (Angrily) You idiot! You just lost us Tom Selleck! I'm gonna-!

Rippin Took: (Still shouting in pain) Ow! It's not that big of a deal anyways! Anyone's who's had more than one guest appearance on Friends isn't that big of guest star anyways! Ow!