Scene Seven

(Now, we see Megolas stop in her tracks as she looks to the east-it is approaching dawn at this moment and the three members of the company are resuming their search for the hobbits)

Megolas: (Dramatically) A red sun rises. (She looks back towards Brimli & Jimagorn) Blood has been shed.

Brimli: (Muttering to Jimagorn) Or that could just be the color of the sun, dimwit!

(Jimagorn stifles a laugh, and Megolas appears to not have heard)

Megolas: (Seriously) We have to continue! Let's go!

(The three begin running, Jimagorn in the lead again as they run along the plains of Rohan. We see them run from one big pile of rocks and stop in center of a pass. Jimagorn stoops down to study the tracks, while Megolas & Brimli stop to rest. We see Megolas look to behind the pass, and she suddenly runs up to Jimagorn. She indicates the area behind the pass, and Jimagorn leads them behind a large boulder off to the side, Megolas pulling Brimli behind. They take their cover, and a few minutes later, we hear the sound of approaching horses-a large group of them, at that. Then, we see the Riders of Rohan approach from the pass and filter into the field beyond. Luckily, they pay no heed to the people behind the boulder. We now see Megolas speak to Jimagorn)

Megolas: (In a whisper) Who are they, friend or foe?

Jimagorn: (Rolling his eyes) Why am I the one that gets asked these questions? Why do all the questions about the race of Man go to me?

Megolas: (Coolly) Because you're a long lost heir to the throne of Gondor and you're a Man, you dope!

Jimagorn: (Clutching his chest) Oh yes! (Squints at the Riders' insignia plastered upon their flags and banners) Relax-they're from Edoras! They're friend!

(With no further argument, Jimagorn jumps from his concealment behind the boulder, the other two following him. Jimagorn yells for the Riders)

Jimagorn: (Friendly as he shouts) Riders of Rohan! What news of the Mark?

(The Riders of Rohan abruptly turn their horses around delicately to approach the three people)

Brimli: (In an amazed tone) That's pretty artistic.

(The Riders of Rohan then circles the small company, pointing their spears at whom they believe as enemies or trespassers. Jimagorn's eyes grow rather large as this unexpected predicament, and he grasps his chest in support. Megolas looks severely bad-tempered at this)

Megolas: (Mumbling to Jimagorn) "Friends from Edoras", eh?

Jimagorn: (Scolding at the Elf) Shut up!

(We now see Méomer looking at Jimagorn and the other two with severe mistrust upon his face. He is wearing a helmet and armor-typical garb for a Rider of Rohan)

Méomer: (In a gruff, demanding tone) What business does a Man, an Elf, and a Dwarf have upon the Rohan?

Brimli: (In a rather bright tone) Give me your business, horse-master, and I shall give you mine.

(Méomer gives such a venomous glare at Brimli; even she shrinks back slightly in fear. Jimagorn gives a faint smile at this. We see Rider of Rohan#1 look at Rider of Rohan#2 questioningly)

Rider of Rohan#1: (Whispering) Uh-that's considered as an insult, now?

Rider of Rohan#2: (Shrugging and whispering back) I guess so-I wasn't around when they made it so. (Scolding the other) I told you we should have gone to the last meeting instead of that Styx concert!

Rider of Rohan#1: (Scolding) Hey! That was important!

(We see Méomer hop off his horse and approach Brimli, who is looking rather uncomfortable at the moment)

Méomer: (Coldly) I would cut off your head, Dwarf, if it stood but a little higher off the ground!

Brimli: (Glaring at the other) Are you calling me short?

(We suddenly see Megolas whip out an arrow with lightning-quick speed and place it in her bow, and she points it at Méomer with a sharp glare on her face)

Megolas: (Deadly serious, her hand not quivering on her weapon) You would die before your stroke fell!

(Méomer looks rather surprised and backs away, but the Riders of Rohan inch their spears closer towards the group. Jimagorn looks rather embarrassed- this isn't turning out like he planned at all. Megolas still has her weapon drawn, looking quite angry. Brimli is wearing a shocked expression of gratitude upon her face as she looks at the Elf)

Brimli: (In a shocked voice) Megolas, I had no idea that you cared!

Megolas: (Snapping angrily at the Dwarf) Shut up, shorty!

(We now focus on Jimagorn, who looks as though this has gone on long enough)

Jimagorn: (In a simple, understanding tone) All right! All right! Everyone calm down! (Looks at Méomer) This is not going on as well as I would have liked. My name is Jimagorn, son of Jimathorn. And this is Brimli, daughter of Bloin. (Waves at the Dwarf casually) And this is Megolas, of the Woodland Realm. (Glances at the Elf, and whispers to Méomer) She doesn't have a father.

Megolas: (Shocked as she lowers her weapon) Hey! I had to tell myself for a hundred years that it wasn't my fault that daddy left! You leave my personal problems out of this!

(Jimagorn chooses not to reply, busy conversing with Méomer, who looks unconvinced)

Jimagorn: (In a reassuring tone) We are friends of Kevoden, your king.

Méomer: (Gives a small, dark laugh as he speaks) Kevoden does not recognize friend from foe-(Takes off his helmet) not even his own kin.

(Recognizing the gesture, the Riders of Rohan lower their spears and back away from the group in recognition. Méomer speaks darkly)

Méomer: (His words spoken as if they were poison) Andraman has poisoned the mind of our king, making him believe things he would never believe-do things he would never do-

Rider of Rohan#3: (Darkly) Like walk about the palace with tissue boxes on his feet and wearing a bucket on his head.

Méomer: (To Rider of Rohan#3 in a practical tone) Uh-no, he did that before Andraman poisoned his mind.

Rider of Rohan#3: (Looking about awkwardly) O-kay.

Méomer: (Back to Jimagorn) He is "inventing" new ways to run Edoras. Some of us are still for the old ways-and for that, we are banished. (Speaks darkly) The older and most gorgeous wizard is cunning. He walks from here to there, they say. And everywhere he goes-his spies slip past our nets. (Cast a dark look at the three strangers)

Jimagorn: (Honestly) We are not spies! (In a desperate tone) We are tracking a group of Urak-hai that have two of our friends held captive.

Méomer: (In a questioning tone) Is that your only reason?

Megolas: (Sarcastically) No, one of them stole my tea cozy. Of course that's our only reason! Do you think we like running about the whole of Rohan, chasing a bunch of B.O ridden Orcs?

Jimagorn: (In a defensive tone) I like running!

Megolas: (Angrily) Yeah, well you like touching yourself, also!

Méomer: (In a defensive tone) What's wrong with that? (Touches himself on the chest)

Jimagorn: (Smiling at the other fondly) I believe we understand one another.

Megolas: (Angrily) Great! Another nutter that likes to grope himself! Just what we need!

(At that moment, the Riders of Rohan begin muttering their objections and start stroking themselves on the chest. Jimagorn & Méomer look at the Riders with severe pride)

Jimagorn: (In a positive tone) You have trained a great army.

Méomer: (Smiling) I learn from the best.

Megolas: (Throwing her hands in the air angrily) Good Lord! What is it with Men and touching themselves? It's sick! (Gives a great sigh of frustration) You're all freaks!

Jimagorn: (Seriously speaking to Méomer) But, getting back to the situation at hand, you wouldn't happen to know where the Urak-hai members have turned, would you?

Méomer: (In a gruff tone) We slaughtered the Urak-hai members last night.

Brimli: (In a desperate tone) But the hobbits! Did you see two hobbits with them?

Jimagorn: (In a descriptive, but worried tone) They are small-very small. They are only children through your eyes. They've also got disgusting, hairy feet as well.

Megolas: (With a small laugh) You talk about disgusting as you stroke yourself on the chest.

Méomer: (After a moment's silence) We left none alive.

(Jimagorn, Megolas, & Brimli look horrified at this, and they look from one to another in desperation. Méomer looks down in small dismay, realizing the grave error he has made. Jimagorn stares at him in hopes that he might put a small ray of hope in there somewhere. Suddenly, Brimli speaks gruffly)

Brimli: (Angrily) You Men are just obsessed with killing things, aren't you? WHY DON'T YOU EVER TAKE CAPTIVES!

Megolas: (Joining in irritably) I swear! All you Men ever do these days is grope yourselves and kill everything! No wonder we're in the same mess we were in over three thousand years ago!

Méomer: (To an intent Jimagorn) We piled the carcasses and burnt them-so that they don't rot, because that's just nasty.

(Jimagorn looks to the distance where his face falls as he sees a faint stream of smoke rising. We see Méomer pull the reins of two horses towards Jimagorn, looking very ashamed at the moment)

Méomer: (In a sympathetic tone) Take these horses.

Rider of Rohan#4: (In an objecting voice) Hey! That's my horse! I got that from my grandpa!

Rider of Rohan#5: (Whining) Méomer! What'd I do? Why's my horse gotta go?

Méomer: (In a dark tone to the Riders) It's more than you deserve! You two killed without comprehension or thought of what you were doing! You ought to be ashamed!

Rider of Rohan#5: (Incredulously) What? You killed Orcs too! You put a sword right through the head of one of 'em! I saw you! And after it was all over, you put a head of one Orc on a stick and ran about the camp sight, laughing up a storm!

Rider of Rohan#4: (In an agreeing tone) Yeah! Shouldn't you give your horse to them as well?

Méomer: (Looking at the two Riders and speaking abruptly) All right-no dinner for you tonight! You two are one Guard duty-two nights in a row!

(Both Riders groan in complaint, but Méomer turns to Jimagorn)

Méomer: (In a sorrowful tone) Let these horses be a payment for what we had done.

Megolas: (Taking the reins of one horse and speaking rather bitterly) Oh yes! You kill our friends, give us two horses, and expect us to forgive you! Oh yes! I think that covers it!

Jimagorn: (With an understanding tone) Excuse my friend, Méomer. (Casts a brief scold at Megolas) She's distraught. (Looks at Méomer) We appreciate your gratitude and your help. (Touches chest in salute)

Méomer: (Also touching chest in salute) It was our pleasure, Jimagorn, son of Jimathorn. (Mounts his horse and shouts to his Riders) We ride north! YAH!

(Méomer kicks the sides of his horse and it canters off to the front of the group, heading north. The Riders of Rohan follow suit, occasionally muttering their apologies to Jimagorn and his group. Megolas gives a forlorn sigh)

Megolas: (In a simple tone, stroking her horse's mane) Well, what do we do now?

Jimagorn: (Turning the reins of his horse in his hands) Well, we've gone this far. (Looks to where the smoke rises forbiddingly) Wouldn't hurt to take a poke.

(We now see the three riding towards the camp, Jimagorn riding ahead of Megolas, who has Brimli sharing her horse. As we near the camp sight, we see Jimagorn's face flash into dismay, and he looks behind him to Megolas & Brimli)

Jimagorn: (Shouting) We near the camp! Hurry!

(We now catch the face of Megolas, riding up front, clutching the reins tightly. Brimli sits behind her, grabbing her waist tightly. At Jimagorn's words, Megolas digs her heels into the horse and the horse trots faster. Now, we see the three approach the camp sight, a huge smoldering pile of Orcs in the dead center. The three stop, and Jimagorn immediately dismounts)

Brimli: (Sliding off the horse and looking disgusted at the pile) Ugh! What a pretty decoration!

(Megolas dismounts the horse and begins to look about the sight with Jimagorn. Brimli moves off to the side, scanning the ground with squinted eyes. Then, she lets out a small whine of dismay as she sees something: a weapons' belt-one of the belts given to the hobbits in Lórien. Slowly, Brimli picks it up and turns around towards Jimagorn & Megolas, who look at Brimli with frightened stares)

Brimli: (In a forlorn tone) It's-It's one of their belts! One of the hobbits' belts!

(We suddenly see Megolas look down in respects, and begin to say something in Elvish-a poem or scripture of some kind. Jimagorn looks horribly upset as he stares at the belt)

Jimagorn: (Sorrowful) It-It can't be-!

Brimli: (Sadly) I'm sorry, Jimagorn. (Megolas resumes speaking in Elvish, her face filled with deep despair as she does so. Soon, Brimli starts singing, "Up Against the Wall, Redneck Mother", like she did when they sent Mikomir down the waterfall from the first movie. Jimagorn's face goes from forlorn to enraged, and he roughly kicks at a stray helmet on the ground, screaming out his frustration and sinking to the ground on his knees. Megolas & Brimli stop speaking and singing to look at Jimagorn)

Megolas: (In a scornful tone) Well, that's not going to solve anything!

Brimli: (In a blank voice) We've-We've failed them! Damn it! We've failed them!

(Jimagorn doesn't reply, too upset to do anything. Then, his eyes open and he looks at the ground. Suddenly, he sees something that makes his face go into puzzlement. We see it too-a slightly flattened piece of earth, with a slightly flattened, dried up piece of horse manure. Megolas & Brimli look at one another in confusion)

Jimagorn: (In a simple tone) That's it!

Megolas: (Looks at the scene and frowns) Doesn't look like it-kind of looks like horse crap.

(Jimagorn begins to explain, indicating the scene as he goes)

Jimagorn: (Pointing to the flattened piece of earth) A hobbit lied here. And then.

(We suddenly go back to where we last left Rippin Took, who's screaming in fear as the horse plans to poop on her. Immediately, she rolls off to the side seconds before we see the manure flop on the ground. We hear Jimagorn speak)

Voice of Jimagorn: (Logically) She moved out of the way-but.

(We see Rippin Took's face fall as we hear a squishing noise. She lifts her hands and scolds as she realizes that they have horse manure on them)

Rippin Took: (Angrily flinging her hands) YUCK! (She then looks about the area, focusing on the situation at hand. She sees something) Jessie!

(We now see Jimagorn at the camp sight, crawling on his hands and knees, surveying the tracks)

Jimagorn: (In detail) And they crawled, their hands were bound.

Brimli: (Muttering to Megolas) Well, duh! Otherwise, why'd they be crawling?

(Megolas shushes the Dwarf. We now see Rippin Took accompanied by Jessie Brandybuck, crawling frantically away from the battle taking place. We go back to Jimagorn, who has found a length of rope not too far away. And there's another rope a few inches from that one)

Jimagorn: (As he looks at the rope) Their binds were cut.

(We see Rippin Took find an Orc's axe and begin to saw at the binds frantically, glancing at the scene behind her. They finally snap and she rips them away. Then, she dashes over to Jessie Brandybuck and begins to untie hers. It takes a while; Rippin Took's hands keep slipping)

Jessie Brandybuck: (Impatiently) Hurry up, Rippin!

Rippin Took: (Frantically) I'm trying, Jessie! You know I was never good with knots!

(Jessie Brandybuck's ropes are undone, and they run from the scene. Then, a horse rears on its feet in front of them, causing them to pause. Rippin Took looks quite frightened)

Jessie Brandybuck: (Urgently) LET'S GO, RIPPIN!

(Both the hobbits run under the horse, first Jessie Brandybuck, and then Rippin Took. Once they are safe enough, the hobbits look about worriedly)

Rippin Took: (Worried) What're we going to do, Jessie? What are we going to do?

Jessie Brandybuck: (Sternly) Don't worry, Rippin! Just-blend in!

(Both the hobbits begin to whistle casually, and waltz about the battle as of two people walking through the park. We go back to Jimagorn, who is now surveying another spot on the ground)

Jimagorn: (Darkly) They were pursued.

(We see Jessie Brandybuck shout out as something holds her back. She looks behind her and screams as she realizes that it's Urak-hai Member#8, hissing as he has a firm grip on her weapons' belt)

Jessie Brandybuck: (Angrily, trying to break free) Why-won't you-die?

Rippin Took: (Desperately) The belt, Jessie! The belt!

(With a quick movement, Jessie Brandybuck undoes the belt, and they bolt away from the Orc. Urak-hai Member#8 hisses as he realizes that he clutches an empty weapons' belt and throws it beside him, crawling after the hobbits. We go back to Jimagorn, who is now on his feet and surveying the ground intently)

Jimagorn: (In an eager tone) They fled.

(We see Jessie Brandybuck & Rippin Took dashing away from the scene. Then, we see Jimagorn stop in his tracks and look puzzled at something)

Jimagorn: (Still confused) One of them kept stopping, for some reason.

(We see Jessie Brandybuck stop in her tracks to pull up her pants, which are too big for her. Rippin Took waits impatiently)

Rippin Took: (Urgently) Jessie! Hurry up!

Jessie Brandybuck: (Irritably) It's no good! Without my belt, my pants keep slipping down my bottom! (Begins to run again)

Rippin Took: (In an agitated tone) Why do you buy pants that are too big for you, anyways?

Jessie Brandybuck: (In an indignant manner as she stops to pull her pants up again) They make me feel thinner!

(We go back to Jimagorn, who is still following the tracks)

Jimagorn: (Growing more excited) And they fled! They fled into.

(Jimagorn stops abruptly as he looks up and sees that he is bordering the Fangorn Forest. His eyes go dreadfully wide. Megolas & Brimli run behind him, and they both gasp at the forest-slowly becoming more dismayed as they realize that the hobbits have gone in there)

Brimli: (In a small voice) What madness would drive them there?

(The three look at one another and nod)

Jimagorn, Megolas, & Brimli: Rippin.