Title: Ramen Before Bedtime

Authoress: Keitorin

Date Written & Completed: Saturday, February 07, 04 (About 6 AM)

Type: Short Drabble (thing), no pairings, silliness

Comment: Just something random pulled out of my head from lack of anything better to write. Warning, I suck at writing humor.

Disclaimer: To the original author: Kishimoto-sensei, I bow down to you in hopes that you wont't eat me. Or I just ask that you let me borrow your characters for this undeserving fanfic…

Naruto was bouncing happily around the village of Konoha, which was rather deserted looking if Naruto had been observant. Still, he bounced along humming an off tune song to himself. As he neared an alley, he could hear rather strange noises, so he decided to investigate. He slowly and cautiously tiptoed to the corner of the building beside it and peered around.

What he saw made his eyes widen I shock and his mouth drop open. After a moment he closed it and hurriedly ran in the opposite direction. Finding a place to rest, he slid down the side of a tree to catch his breath and think.

He knew that Ino and Shikamaru where on the same team, but he sure didn't know that they were involved in that way! I mean, they were nearly sucking each other's faces off!!

"Whew." He sighed and rubbed some sweat off of his forehead.

"It really is none of my business, I just hope they still have faces in the end." He murmured before getting ready to stand.

"Excuse me, Naruto-kun?" Came a shy voice right in front of him, making him look up. Hinata was standing there, with a strangely shy and red face. Naruto gave her a small smile and brushed himself off.

"Hello Hinata! What are you doing?" Hinata's face grew redder, though she smiled and seemed to grow closer to Naruto.

"Well…I was just wondering you know, if you wanted to go out somewhere?" As she spoke, she grew incredibly close to Naruto, but Naruto hadn't noticed yet. He blinked and seemed to think. The moment his eyes closed he felt something, or rather some one latch on to his arm, causing him to yell and open his eyes..only to stare right into the face of Hinata, who stared back with a slight pout on her face as she started blinking her eyelashes at him. Naruto stared. After a full moment of staring and growing horror, he let out a squeak of fright and made a run for it. This time, he didn't stop until he reached his favorite Ramen stand, Ichiraku. He hurriedly took a seat to catch his breath, taking a quick look around to make sure he hadn't been followed. Breath recovered, he realized exactly where he was and decided he was getting rather hungry and could do with some of his favorite Miso Ramen.

But as he looked up to order the old man seemed to be closing up the shop already!

"Jii-san, what's going on, it's still early?!" He asked frantically. The old man turned to stare, and Naruto had a very bad feeling…

The old man spoke three impossible, dreaded words.

"We ran out." He opened up the lids of the containers that usually held the ramen. There was complete silence for two whole minutes before Naruto grabbed his head and moaned.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" For another whole minute this went on, before standing up and running straight forward, right into a solid object, most likely a human being. Naruto took a step back and slowly looked up, straight into the face of one angry Hyuuga Neji.

"You made Hinata-sama cry." He spoke menacingly. Naruto's eyes widened and he 'eeped' before turning left and began to run desperately, once again. After a few minutes of running he figured it was safe, so he stopped in the middle of the road.

He was bent over catching his breath, when he was scared half to death by a hand on his shoulder. He whipped around only to see Sakura standing there, giving him this strange look and blinking, much the same way Hinata had been doing earlier. However, Naruto ignored this and sighed in relief.

"Sakura-chan, you don't know how happy I am to see you!" Weird things have been happening to me all day!" He rambled on, but stopped immediately as Sakura's hands attached themselves to his pajamas-..Wait a minute, pajamas!?

He was distracted by Sakura's tugging at him as she spoke.

"Won't you kiss me? Naruto-kun." She whimpered to him, closing her eyes and bringing her face dangerously close to his. Naruto's eyes grew incredibly round as he stared at her and her puckered lips. Time seemed to stop the second Sakura's lips were almost against his, and in that second Sakura's hands grew bigger, hair changed to a black and grew longer, and tongue grew very much longer. Standing in the same place Sakura had been, gripping his arms, stood Orochimaru, tongue lolling out of his mouth. Naruto's pupils where as small as fleas by then.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" He screamed, much like a girl for some reason, and frantically looked for a place to run and hide, which was quite pointless by the way. In his haste to scramble away, he tripped over his own feet and began to fall backwards. The last things he saw before his mind exploded with color, was Sasuke standing over to one side, with his hands in his pockets with a bored expression on his face while he blew bubbles with bubblegum, which surely did not exist in that time.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!" Naruto screamed, jerking upright in bed, sweaty and tangled up in his sheets, which almost smothered him. His eyes were wide-awake as he looked around the room, as though thinking he would see Orochimaru right there in his room. After several minutes of deep breathing and checking under the bed, he lay back, rubbed his face harshly, and mumbled:

"I will never eat Ramen before bedtime again."