Scene Twenty-Three
(We now see everybody who is defending the keep lined up behind the walls or somewhere else, waiting for the awaiting onslaught to come. There is a very tense silence throughout the entire area, rarely anybody is speaking or has the desire to speak. We go along the outermost wall, where there are many Woodelves lined up. As we go down the row, we see a bit of a gap in between one Woodelf and Megolas. Megolas looks down at the gap, where we see the tip of a Dwarf's helmet wave about: it's Brimli)
Brimli: (Agitated) What're you looking at, freak-oid?
(Megolas quickly averts her attention towards the distance ahead, and the camera catches Jimagorn standing next to her, decked out in his battle clothes and ready to fight. We take a look in the distance and see a horrifying sight: thousands of Urak-hai Members heading towards the keep, their torches lit and looking threatening. In the distance, we hear the faint sound of drums being beaten. Megolas looks upon the scene grimly)
Megolas: (Quietly, to Jimagorn) Look at them, Jimagorn! Like-a thousand ants, racing for a piece of rotten meat.
Jimagorn: (In an amazed tone to the Elf) Well-I was going to say that it looked like a big Risk game, but your analogy is much better!
Megolas: (With a small smile at the other) Jimagorn, we are willing to stand besides you valiantly in battle.
Jimagorn: (Looking very flattered) Really?
Megolas: Yeah.(In a stern voice) So don't screw it up like you always do!
Jimagorn: (Stubbornly) All right! All right! Gees! (Rolling his eyes) You lady Elves are all the same!
(There is a great flash of light from above, followed by a great boom of thunder.there is going to be a storm. After a few ominous sounds of thunder and more flashes of lightning, the rain begins to cascade from above, showering the land. We now see the Urak-hai side, still pressing on, undaunted. Then, we see Urak-hai Member#45 stand up on a large rock protruding from the soil and begin to speak in loud roars, but the rain and sound of marching blocks out his words from the protagonists waiting at Helm's Deep. Megolas & Jimagorn look very unnerved by this Orc's appearance upon the rock-he's probably egging them on)
Jimagorn: (In a small voice) What's he doing?
Megolas: (In a very dark tone) He is most likely egging his troops on! To not be blessed with the tongue of Mordor is a true blessing indeed! Imagine what awful things he must be saying!
(We go to Urak-hai Member#45, who is speaking in English to his troops)
Urak-hai Member#45: (In a very loud voice, sounding quite annoyed) Has anyone seen my towels? They were here five minutes ago, and now they're gone! I know they didn't just get up and walk away! I remember packing them when we stopped to rest earlier, but now I cannot find them! If you would please return them, or oblige yourself into looking for them, I would be very happy! They are pink and fuzzy, and they match my robe-which is also missing!
(We go back to Helm's Deep, where Jimagorn straightens his mail shirt uneasily, and we clearly catch a patch of fuzzy pink under his garments-he is wearing the Orc's robe. Megolas looks at Jimagorn with wide eyes)
Megolas: (In a speechless voice) Jimagorn-!
Jimagorn: (Defensively clutching his chest) He can't prove anything!
(We go back to the Urak-hai troops, who have reached a fair distance towards the keep-a good run will take them to the outer walls. The troops are massive-it doesn't take a genius to tell that it will not be a fair fight. Knowing their numbers are strong, many of the Urak-hai Members begin to bang their spears upon the ground in a threatening, ominous tone. We then see King Kevoden look at Commander Awry in sudden anticipation)
King Kevoden: (Quite excited and hopeful) Is that their battle plan? Are they just going to bang sticks on the earth all night long?
Commander Awry: (Raising his eyebrow at the king) Er-no sir. They are trying to intimidate us.
King Kevoden: (In a forlorn tone) Oh, drat!
(We go to the outer wall, where Jimagorn is speaking to many Woodelves and Men who have their bows out and ready to fire)
Jimagorn: (Shouting over the bangs and booms and rain) Show them no mercy- for you shall receive none from them! (In an offhand type of voice) Or-you might, but that would be very strange!
(We go to Megolas, who has her bow drawn and held ready, is speaking to Maldir and the other Woodelven troops nearby)
Megolas: (In Elvish as she looks upon the Urak-hai Members) Weak spots on them are the neck and the armpit.shoot there.
Maldir: (In Elvish, looking very nervous) How can you tell?
Megolas: (Her arm not quivering under the strain of holding the bow, speaking to the other in Elvish) When you've been in this position for a full five minutes, you tend to try and look at anything that will take your mind off shooting something!
(We go back to the Urak-hai Members, who are still banging their sticks upon the sodden earth, kicking up much dirt and debris, but not caring. They know that they will win this fight-they have nothing but time. Then, we see Jimagorn speak to his troops loudly)
Jimagorn: (Loudly and firmly) Do not fire! Only fire upon my word!
Citizen of Edoras#22: (Confused) What? Did you say you were a terd?
Citizen of Edoras#23: (Practically) I thought he said he was going to handle the herd!
Jimagorn: (Angrily) No, you ninnies! I said that on my word, go ahead and fire!
Citizen of Edoras#25: (Very confused) Damn it, Jimagorn! I don't have time to buy new tires!
Jimagorn: (Angrily) Will you listen a bit better? I said, "On my word, go ahead and fire!"
Citizen of Edoras#22: (To Citizen of Edoras#21 in a confused tone) Did he say he was a liar? 'Cause if so, I'm not-!
Jimagorn: (Angrily) Not "liar", you fool! "Fire"!
Citizen of Edoras#24: (To Citizen of Edoras#22) "Sire"?
Citizen of Edoras#22: (Loudly for the other to hear) FIRE!
Citizen of Edoras#21: (Quickly, very nervous) Fire? Okay!
(And before anyone can stop him, Citizen of Edoras#21 quickly fires his arrow, sending it flying towards Urak-hai Member#35. The arrow hits the Orc right under the neck, causing a deadly hush to go over the Urak-hai troops. Back at the gates, Jimagorn is looking livid)
Jimagorn: (Angrily shouting) HOLD YOUR FIRE!
Citizen of Edoras#21: (Quickly putting his bow out of sight) Er-oopsies. (The troops defending Helm's Deep glance at one another uncomfortably-the sudden silence from the opposing force is quite unnerving. Then, Urak-hai Member#35 hits the earth roughly, dead upon the spot. Then, we see Urak- hai Member#45 upon his rock perch look up at the defenders of Helm's Deep angrily)
Urak-hai Member#45: (In a very angry tone) Well-we were just going to tell you we would give you one more day, on account that it's raining and all we have is metal armor; but if you're going to come and kill my troops already, I don't see the point! My troops will fight in the rain!
Urak-hai Member#46: (Quite angrily at the defenders) Yeah! I hope you're happy! I've gotta fight in this rain, and my armor's already starting to rust!
Urak-hai Member#45: (In a very tough, menacing voice to his troops) More the reason to kill everyone!
Urak-hai Member#67: (In a happy tone) Really?
(Urak-hai Member#67 then drives his sword right into the back of nearby Urak-hai Member#66, who dies immediately. But Urak-hai Member#45 is angrily shouting at Urak-hai Member#67)
Urak-hai Member#45: (Angrily) Not everyone on our side, you ninny! I meant at Helm's Deep!
Urak-hai Member#67: (In a practical tone) Well, maybe you should have said that before I killed him!
(Rolling his eyes at this, Urak-hai Member#45 gives a great roar, and his troops rush at the outer wall of Helm's Deep-the battle has begun. We go to Jimagorn, who is giving orders to the troops behind him, who have their bows drawn and ready to shoot)
Jimagorn: (Drawing his sword and bringing it in the air) Ready and-(Brings the sword down with a shout) FIRE!
(The troops fire, and Jimagorn gives a squeal of pain. He turns around and sees that one of the arrows hit him right in the rump. He pulls it out angrily)
Jimagorn: (To his troops) Try not firing at me, you ninnies!
Woodelf Soldier#18: (In an agitated tone) Then get the heck out of our way!
Jimagorn: (With his eyes wide in shock) And out of the camera's glorious view? NEVER!
(We now go to Megolas, who is with Maldir and firing arrow after arrow towards the opposing force coming towards the gate. With superb accuracy, many of the Orcs go down before they are able to take five steps towards the outer wall. But many are not a factor in this fight, and the forces keep on coming. Many of the Orcs have reached the outer wall and are trying to bring it down. But the defenders are valiant, and they begin to shoot arrows at the Orcs below; some even pull out rocks and drop them upon the heads of the enemy. Then, we see the Orc forces below begin to bring humongous ladders to the base of the outer wall-they're going to try and ascend the outer wall. But Jimagorn catches wind of what they're doing)
Jimagorn: (Shouting) LADDERS!
Woodelf Soldier#15: (Rolling his eyes as he shoots more arrows) Well, obviously!
Jimagorn: (Shouting to the citizens and soldiers behind him) Get defenses at the edge and make ready to cut them down! They cannot possibly scale the wall that fast!
(We hear the sound of many grappling hooks attaching to the edge of the outer wall, and the ladders are beginning to make their speedy ascend. Before long, we see many Urak-hai Members start to make their way toward the defenders on the outer wall)
Jimagorn: (Practically) Uh-okay, new plan! Everybody run over to them and start killing them!
(Many of the soldiers and citizens make to defend the keep, but the Orcs are beginning to multiply in number-the ladder allows them to gain reinforcements for those that go down. And the Urak-hai Members charge in a suicidal manner, not caring if their own lives are taken just so long as they can kill something. The Woodelves are making their defense with arrows, and some with swords. Somehow, many of the Orcs are able to squirm away from the fray and are try to breech the keep. We see Megolas standing upon a stairwell leading to the top of the wall, watching many of the Orcs engaged in battle with many of the defenders. With one movement, Megolas grabs a nearby shield, steps on it, and inches her way towards the stairs)
Megolas: (Quietly, as she draws out her bow and arrow) Tony Hawk, don't fail me now!
(And with that, Megolas slides down the stairs, shooting surprised Orc after surprised Orc with arrows. We see Brimli, who is standing nearby, roll her eyes)
Brimli: (In a quiet grumble) Show off!
(Brimli merely shrugs and begins to fight off Urak-hai Member#56. It is a ferocious fight. The Dwarf is able to defend herself well, but the Urak- hai Member#56 is hysterical with blood lust)
Urak-hai Member#56: (In a growling type voice) I look forward to devouring you! Brimli: (In a practical tone) Well, that's a pity. (Growling almost) I look forward to killing you!
(With that, Brimli is able to finish the Urak-hai Member off with a quick swipe of her axe. Then, the Dwarf looks at Megolas, who is fighting off another Urak-hai Member, which she finishes off with a quick stab in the face)
Brimli: (Prideful) Hey, Megolas! Thirty-seven!
Megolas: (With a small shrug) No matter! I've killed thirty-nine!
Brimli: (Furrowing her brow) No.I was guessing your age.
Megolas: (Scowling) What makes you believe I'm so old?
Brimli: (With a shrug) I'm just guessing!
(We go back to the fight at hand, where Men are beginning to cut down the ladders with their swords frantically. They let out shouts of triumph when one ladder goes down, but only give shouts of dismay as another ladder makes its appearance)
Elderly Man of Edoras#1: (In a very feeble voice as he cuts down another ladder) I'm getting way too old for this!
King Kevoden: (To Commander Awry) Give them a volley!
(With a shrug, Commander Awry throws a volleyball towards the troops, which becomes impaled upon one of the spears. Commander Awry looks back at King Kevoden)
Commander Awry: (With a shrug) Didn't work, sire!
King Kevoden: (Putting a hand to his head in frustration) This is going to be a long battle!
(Jimagorn, who has finished off one Orc with a wave of a sword, looks towards the left of the outer wall and gives a great shout of shock. We see it too. Coming up the ramp near the outer wall towards the gate, are many Urak-hai Members, with shields covering their top)
Jimagorn: (Shouting hysterically at the archers) The outer gate! They're at the outer gate!
(We see Urak-hai Member#41, who is within the group heading towards the gate, curse and look at Urak-hai Member#48, who is next to him)
Urak-hai Member#41: (Angrily) Dang it! They spotted us! We should probably turn around-!
Urak-hai Member#48: (Frustrated) You fool! We have shields! I know how much you want to watch Family Matters, but we've got better things to do!
Urak-hai Member#41: (In a low grumble) Not as important as Urkle!
(The of the outer wall begin to shoot at the Urak-hai Members approaching the gate, but the arrows bounce off harmlessly. But the defenders are not to loose hope so easily. They continue their assault, occasionally catching one unfortunate Urak-hai Member by chance. Suddenly there is the sound of running up the ramp of the gate, and we see many of the shielded Urak-hai Members go flying. Then, we see about a good dozen Urak-hai Members bearing a huge battering ram. They begin to ram at the gate ominously, trying desperately to breech the wall. But the defenders continue their assault with more ferocity. Pretty soon, the Urak-hai Members at the gate back away, slightly subdued in number. They left a hole in their defenses and the Woodelves and Men are able to shoot at them, killing many. Pretty soon, the Urak-hai Members have retreated from the ramp, one of their plans have failed. But the Men have little time to celebrate. While one attempt to breech the wall has been subdued, there is an increased number in the amount of ladders being wrought up. But each Orc that comes up is cut down viciously, with few casualties towards their enemies. Then, we see the confident look upon King Kevoden's face)
King Kevoden: (In a very confident voice) Ha! Is this your plan, Andraman? Is this all you have? Come on! Give me a real challenge!
(There is a real challenge. Many of the Urak-hai Members are at the bottom of the outer wall, where there is the small gate of iron with water seeping through it-exactly what Nrima Wormfeces was talking about in scene seventeen. Many Urak-hai Members are rapidly placing spiked explosives within the gate-they mean to blow up the gate and make their way through. Jimagorn looks off the wall and furrows his brow at the amount of activity going on down near the well. Then, his face goes into a look of utmost shock as he sees Urak-hai Member#74 running up to the wall, bearing a huge torch and running through a clear pathway towards the well. Jimagorn realizes what is going on)
Jimagorn: (Shouting at the archers and defenders) STOP HIM! HE'S GOING TO BREECH THE WALL!
(Back down at the scene at hand, we see Urak-hai Member#74 running in slow motion towards the well, with the Olympics Theme Song playing in the back round. Many of the Urak-hai Members are cheering him on. Many of the defenders of the keep are shooting arrows after arrow at the Urak-hai Member, but he pushes on, undaunted by the many arrows that are stuck within his neck or skin. When he is able to reach the well, Urak-hai Member#74 dives into the well with the torch. There is a great BOOM! and an explosion of fire and spark, and Urak-hai Member#74 goes flying, screaming hysterically)
Urak-hai Member#74: (As he goes flying) This wasn't part of the deal!
(The wall then begins to crumble at a fair section, causing many Men or Woodelves to parish and fall down. Jimagorn then realizes what must be done)
Jimagorn: (Brandishing his sword and speaking to the Woodelves behind him) Ready yourselves and follow me!
Woodelf Soldier#45: (Rolling his eyes as he looks at Jimagorn) If this is about the blue mail gloves-!
Jimagorn: (Angrily) No! Follow me into battle! (Makes to go, but stops, and turns around) But-you haven't seen them, have you?
(We go back to the breech in the wall, where Urak-hai Members are crawling over the rubble and wading through the water to get inside the outer wall. But Jimagorn is able to meet them head on, accompanied by Megolas, Brimli, & Commander Awry. The forces behind Jimagorn, a very good number of them, line up obediently and make to attack. An Urak-hai Member shoots an arrow, that almost gets Jimagorn in the head, but he turns away in seconds. But Jimagorn's flip has been nicked. Jimagorn places a quivering hand upon the flip and glares at the opposing force. With a great shout, Jimagorn places his sword in the air and yells for the forces behind him to attack. The Woodelves begin their assault, and many of the citizens and soldiers join the fray, trying desperately to defend the keep. We then experience a change in scenes and see the Fangorn Forest, in the dead of night, and we go back to the Entmoot. Many of the Ents are in a circle. Jessie Brandybuck & Rippin Took are off to the side. Rippin Took is sitting at the base of a huge tree, and Jessie Brandybuck is pacing about nervously, occasionally taking her glasses off and cleaning them in nervousness. Rippin Took doesn't seem too worried however)
Rippin Took: (In a simple, non caring tone) Hoover dam, Grand Coulee dam, Brandywine dam, Shire dam, Isengard dam, stone dams, stream dams, beaver dams, wooden dams, rock dams, creek dams, great river dam, concrete d-
Jessie Brandybuck: (Irritably) Will you stop talking about dams already?
Rippin Took: (With a scowl upon her face) What else could I do with my spare time? If anybody needs to recite different dams, it's you!
Jessie Brandybuck: (Frustrated) Damn it, Rippin-!
Rippin Took: (Furrowing her brow) That's not a dam!
Jessie Brandybuck: (Deciding to let this slide) Don't you understand, Rippin? The decision of this Ent Council could change Middle-Earth forever! So forgive me for being just a tad bit worried about this, okay?
(Jessie Brandybuck turns away angrily, but Rippin Took merely nods softly)
Rippin Took: (In a considerate tone) You're forgiven.
(Jessie Brandybuck gives a great sigh of anger, but doesn't say anything. Then, we see Big Nuts turn from the Entmoot and begin to slowly walk over to the hobbits)
Rippin Took: (Excitedly to Jessie Brandybuck) Jessie!
(Jessie Brandybuck turns around and quickly stands beside Rippin Took, who is straightening her shirt quickly. Big Nuts approaches them with huge steps and looks at them for a while)
Big Nuts: (In his slow, grinding voice) The Ents-have agreed.
(Big Nuts goes suddenly silent, suddenly going into a bit of a trance. Jessie Brandybuck & Rippin Took look at one another in curiosity)
Jessie Brandybuck: (In a loud, but patient tone) Yes?
Big Nuts: (Coming out of his daze) Sorry, I was wondering if I turned my stove off this morning.(Clears his throat and gets on with saying what he must say) I have told your names to the Entmoot and they have all agreed that-you are not Orcs.
Rippin Took: (With a small shrug) Er-thanks, I guess.
Jessie Brandybuck: (Irritably) But-what about Andraman? Have you reached a decision about him yet?
Big Nuts: (Waving a hand to push the matter aside) Patience, Miss Brandybuck! I'm getting there! I'm getting there!
Jessie Brandybuck: (Angrily) Well, could you get there a bit faster? I would like to know if you guys are going to do something or not, you know!
Big Nuts: (Patiently, to calm the hobbit down) Peace, Miss Brandybuck! Peace! The use of Old Entish is very complicated, indeed. And the Ents believe that there is nothing worth saying-unless it takes-a very long-time- to-say.
(And with that, Big Nuts turns away and joins the Entmoot again. Jessie Brandybuck looks quite angry at the moment)
Jessie Brandybuck: (Quietly) Well, if that's the way it is, we're going to be here for over five years!
Rippin Took: (Sitting at the tree again) Eh, what're you going to do. (Goes off naming things again) Log dams, city dams, local dams, swimming dams, fishing dams, fishing boat, fishing pole, fishing tackle, fishing net, big nets, small nets.
(Jessie Brandybuck puts a hand to her head in frustration before we go to the next scene)
(We now see everybody who is defending the keep lined up behind the walls or somewhere else, waiting for the awaiting onslaught to come. There is a very tense silence throughout the entire area, rarely anybody is speaking or has the desire to speak. We go along the outermost wall, where there are many Woodelves lined up. As we go down the row, we see a bit of a gap in between one Woodelf and Megolas. Megolas looks down at the gap, where we see the tip of a Dwarf's helmet wave about: it's Brimli)
Brimli: (Agitated) What're you looking at, freak-oid?
(Megolas quickly averts her attention towards the distance ahead, and the camera catches Jimagorn standing next to her, decked out in his battle clothes and ready to fight. We take a look in the distance and see a horrifying sight: thousands of Urak-hai Members heading towards the keep, their torches lit and looking threatening. In the distance, we hear the faint sound of drums being beaten. Megolas looks upon the scene grimly)
Megolas: (Quietly, to Jimagorn) Look at them, Jimagorn! Like-a thousand ants, racing for a piece of rotten meat.
Jimagorn: (In an amazed tone to the Elf) Well-I was going to say that it looked like a big Risk game, but your analogy is much better!
Megolas: (With a small smile at the other) Jimagorn, we are willing to stand besides you valiantly in battle.
Jimagorn: (Looking very flattered) Really?
Megolas: Yeah.(In a stern voice) So don't screw it up like you always do!
Jimagorn: (Stubbornly) All right! All right! Gees! (Rolling his eyes) You lady Elves are all the same!
(There is a great flash of light from above, followed by a great boom of thunder.there is going to be a storm. After a few ominous sounds of thunder and more flashes of lightning, the rain begins to cascade from above, showering the land. We now see the Urak-hai side, still pressing on, undaunted. Then, we see Urak-hai Member#45 stand up on a large rock protruding from the soil and begin to speak in loud roars, but the rain and sound of marching blocks out his words from the protagonists waiting at Helm's Deep. Megolas & Jimagorn look very unnerved by this Orc's appearance upon the rock-he's probably egging them on)
Jimagorn: (In a small voice) What's he doing?
Megolas: (In a very dark tone) He is most likely egging his troops on! To not be blessed with the tongue of Mordor is a true blessing indeed! Imagine what awful things he must be saying!
(We go to Urak-hai Member#45, who is speaking in English to his troops)
Urak-hai Member#45: (In a very loud voice, sounding quite annoyed) Has anyone seen my towels? They were here five minutes ago, and now they're gone! I know they didn't just get up and walk away! I remember packing them when we stopped to rest earlier, but now I cannot find them! If you would please return them, or oblige yourself into looking for them, I would be very happy! They are pink and fuzzy, and they match my robe-which is also missing!
(We go back to Helm's Deep, where Jimagorn straightens his mail shirt uneasily, and we clearly catch a patch of fuzzy pink under his garments-he is wearing the Orc's robe. Megolas looks at Jimagorn with wide eyes)
Megolas: (In a speechless voice) Jimagorn-!
Jimagorn: (Defensively clutching his chest) He can't prove anything!
(We go back to the Urak-hai troops, who have reached a fair distance towards the keep-a good run will take them to the outer walls. The troops are massive-it doesn't take a genius to tell that it will not be a fair fight. Knowing their numbers are strong, many of the Urak-hai Members begin to bang their spears upon the ground in a threatening, ominous tone. We then see King Kevoden look at Commander Awry in sudden anticipation)
King Kevoden: (Quite excited and hopeful) Is that their battle plan? Are they just going to bang sticks on the earth all night long?
Commander Awry: (Raising his eyebrow at the king) Er-no sir. They are trying to intimidate us.
King Kevoden: (In a forlorn tone) Oh, drat!
(We go to the outer wall, where Jimagorn is speaking to many Woodelves and Men who have their bows out and ready to fire)
Jimagorn: (Shouting over the bangs and booms and rain) Show them no mercy- for you shall receive none from them! (In an offhand type of voice) Or-you might, but that would be very strange!
(We go to Megolas, who has her bow drawn and held ready, is speaking to Maldir and the other Woodelven troops nearby)
Megolas: (In Elvish as she looks upon the Urak-hai Members) Weak spots on them are the neck and the armpit.shoot there.
Maldir: (In Elvish, looking very nervous) How can you tell?
Megolas: (Her arm not quivering under the strain of holding the bow, speaking to the other in Elvish) When you've been in this position for a full five minutes, you tend to try and look at anything that will take your mind off shooting something!
(We go back to the Urak-hai Members, who are still banging their sticks upon the sodden earth, kicking up much dirt and debris, but not caring. They know that they will win this fight-they have nothing but time. Then, we see Jimagorn speak to his troops loudly)
Jimagorn: (Loudly and firmly) Do not fire! Only fire upon my word!
Citizen of Edoras#22: (Confused) What? Did you say you were a terd?
Citizen of Edoras#23: (Practically) I thought he said he was going to handle the herd!
Jimagorn: (Angrily) No, you ninnies! I said that on my word, go ahead and fire!
Citizen of Edoras#25: (Very confused) Damn it, Jimagorn! I don't have time to buy new tires!
Jimagorn: (Angrily) Will you listen a bit better? I said, "On my word, go ahead and fire!"
Citizen of Edoras#22: (To Citizen of Edoras#21 in a confused tone) Did he say he was a liar? 'Cause if so, I'm not-!
Jimagorn: (Angrily) Not "liar", you fool! "Fire"!
Citizen of Edoras#24: (To Citizen of Edoras#22) "Sire"?
Citizen of Edoras#22: (Loudly for the other to hear) FIRE!
Citizen of Edoras#21: (Quickly, very nervous) Fire? Okay!
(And before anyone can stop him, Citizen of Edoras#21 quickly fires his arrow, sending it flying towards Urak-hai Member#35. The arrow hits the Orc right under the neck, causing a deadly hush to go over the Urak-hai troops. Back at the gates, Jimagorn is looking livid)
Jimagorn: (Angrily shouting) HOLD YOUR FIRE!
Citizen of Edoras#21: (Quickly putting his bow out of sight) Er-oopsies. (The troops defending Helm's Deep glance at one another uncomfortably-the sudden silence from the opposing force is quite unnerving. Then, Urak-hai Member#35 hits the earth roughly, dead upon the spot. Then, we see Urak- hai Member#45 upon his rock perch look up at the defenders of Helm's Deep angrily)
Urak-hai Member#45: (In a very angry tone) Well-we were just going to tell you we would give you one more day, on account that it's raining and all we have is metal armor; but if you're going to come and kill my troops already, I don't see the point! My troops will fight in the rain!
Urak-hai Member#46: (Quite angrily at the defenders) Yeah! I hope you're happy! I've gotta fight in this rain, and my armor's already starting to rust!
Urak-hai Member#45: (In a very tough, menacing voice to his troops) More the reason to kill everyone!
Urak-hai Member#67: (In a happy tone) Really?
(Urak-hai Member#67 then drives his sword right into the back of nearby Urak-hai Member#66, who dies immediately. But Urak-hai Member#45 is angrily shouting at Urak-hai Member#67)
Urak-hai Member#45: (Angrily) Not everyone on our side, you ninny! I meant at Helm's Deep!
Urak-hai Member#67: (In a practical tone) Well, maybe you should have said that before I killed him!
(Rolling his eyes at this, Urak-hai Member#45 gives a great roar, and his troops rush at the outer wall of Helm's Deep-the battle has begun. We go to Jimagorn, who is giving orders to the troops behind him, who have their bows drawn and ready to shoot)
Jimagorn: (Drawing his sword and bringing it in the air) Ready and-(Brings the sword down with a shout) FIRE!
(The troops fire, and Jimagorn gives a squeal of pain. He turns around and sees that one of the arrows hit him right in the rump. He pulls it out angrily)
Jimagorn: (To his troops) Try not firing at me, you ninnies!
Woodelf Soldier#18: (In an agitated tone) Then get the heck out of our way!
Jimagorn: (With his eyes wide in shock) And out of the camera's glorious view? NEVER!
(We now go to Megolas, who is with Maldir and firing arrow after arrow towards the opposing force coming towards the gate. With superb accuracy, many of the Orcs go down before they are able to take five steps towards the outer wall. But many are not a factor in this fight, and the forces keep on coming. Many of the Orcs have reached the outer wall and are trying to bring it down. But the defenders are valiant, and they begin to shoot arrows at the Orcs below; some even pull out rocks and drop them upon the heads of the enemy. Then, we see the Orc forces below begin to bring humongous ladders to the base of the outer wall-they're going to try and ascend the outer wall. But Jimagorn catches wind of what they're doing)
Jimagorn: (Shouting) LADDERS!
Woodelf Soldier#15: (Rolling his eyes as he shoots more arrows) Well, obviously!
Jimagorn: (Shouting to the citizens and soldiers behind him) Get defenses at the edge and make ready to cut them down! They cannot possibly scale the wall that fast!
(We hear the sound of many grappling hooks attaching to the edge of the outer wall, and the ladders are beginning to make their speedy ascend. Before long, we see many Urak-hai Members start to make their way toward the defenders on the outer wall)
Jimagorn: (Practically) Uh-okay, new plan! Everybody run over to them and start killing them!
(Many of the soldiers and citizens make to defend the keep, but the Orcs are beginning to multiply in number-the ladder allows them to gain reinforcements for those that go down. And the Urak-hai Members charge in a suicidal manner, not caring if their own lives are taken just so long as they can kill something. The Woodelves are making their defense with arrows, and some with swords. Somehow, many of the Orcs are able to squirm away from the fray and are try to breech the keep. We see Megolas standing upon a stairwell leading to the top of the wall, watching many of the Orcs engaged in battle with many of the defenders. With one movement, Megolas grabs a nearby shield, steps on it, and inches her way towards the stairs)
Megolas: (Quietly, as she draws out her bow and arrow) Tony Hawk, don't fail me now!
(And with that, Megolas slides down the stairs, shooting surprised Orc after surprised Orc with arrows. We see Brimli, who is standing nearby, roll her eyes)
Brimli: (In a quiet grumble) Show off!
(Brimli merely shrugs and begins to fight off Urak-hai Member#56. It is a ferocious fight. The Dwarf is able to defend herself well, but the Urak- hai Member#56 is hysterical with blood lust)
Urak-hai Member#56: (In a growling type voice) I look forward to devouring you! Brimli: (In a practical tone) Well, that's a pity. (Growling almost) I look forward to killing you!
(With that, Brimli is able to finish the Urak-hai Member off with a quick swipe of her axe. Then, the Dwarf looks at Megolas, who is fighting off another Urak-hai Member, which she finishes off with a quick stab in the face)
Brimli: (Prideful) Hey, Megolas! Thirty-seven!
Megolas: (With a small shrug) No matter! I've killed thirty-nine!
Brimli: (Furrowing her brow) No.I was guessing your age.
Megolas: (Scowling) What makes you believe I'm so old?
Brimli: (With a shrug) I'm just guessing!
(We go back to the fight at hand, where Men are beginning to cut down the ladders with their swords frantically. They let out shouts of triumph when one ladder goes down, but only give shouts of dismay as another ladder makes its appearance)
Elderly Man of Edoras#1: (In a very feeble voice as he cuts down another ladder) I'm getting way too old for this!
King Kevoden: (To Commander Awry) Give them a volley!
(With a shrug, Commander Awry throws a volleyball towards the troops, which becomes impaled upon one of the spears. Commander Awry looks back at King Kevoden)
Commander Awry: (With a shrug) Didn't work, sire!
King Kevoden: (Putting a hand to his head in frustration) This is going to be a long battle!
(Jimagorn, who has finished off one Orc with a wave of a sword, looks towards the left of the outer wall and gives a great shout of shock. We see it too. Coming up the ramp near the outer wall towards the gate, are many Urak-hai Members, with shields covering their top)
Jimagorn: (Shouting hysterically at the archers) The outer gate! They're at the outer gate!
(We see Urak-hai Member#41, who is within the group heading towards the gate, curse and look at Urak-hai Member#48, who is next to him)
Urak-hai Member#41: (Angrily) Dang it! They spotted us! We should probably turn around-!
Urak-hai Member#48: (Frustrated) You fool! We have shields! I know how much you want to watch Family Matters, but we've got better things to do!
Urak-hai Member#41: (In a low grumble) Not as important as Urkle!
(The of the outer wall begin to shoot at the Urak-hai Members approaching the gate, but the arrows bounce off harmlessly. But the defenders are not to loose hope so easily. They continue their assault, occasionally catching one unfortunate Urak-hai Member by chance. Suddenly there is the sound of running up the ramp of the gate, and we see many of the shielded Urak-hai Members go flying. Then, we see about a good dozen Urak-hai Members bearing a huge battering ram. They begin to ram at the gate ominously, trying desperately to breech the wall. But the defenders continue their assault with more ferocity. Pretty soon, the Urak-hai Members at the gate back away, slightly subdued in number. They left a hole in their defenses and the Woodelves and Men are able to shoot at them, killing many. Pretty soon, the Urak-hai Members have retreated from the ramp, one of their plans have failed. But the Men have little time to celebrate. While one attempt to breech the wall has been subdued, there is an increased number in the amount of ladders being wrought up. But each Orc that comes up is cut down viciously, with few casualties towards their enemies. Then, we see the confident look upon King Kevoden's face)
King Kevoden: (In a very confident voice) Ha! Is this your plan, Andraman? Is this all you have? Come on! Give me a real challenge!
(There is a real challenge. Many of the Urak-hai Members are at the bottom of the outer wall, where there is the small gate of iron with water seeping through it-exactly what Nrima Wormfeces was talking about in scene seventeen. Many Urak-hai Members are rapidly placing spiked explosives within the gate-they mean to blow up the gate and make their way through. Jimagorn looks off the wall and furrows his brow at the amount of activity going on down near the well. Then, his face goes into a look of utmost shock as he sees Urak-hai Member#74 running up to the wall, bearing a huge torch and running through a clear pathway towards the well. Jimagorn realizes what is going on)
Jimagorn: (Shouting at the archers and defenders) STOP HIM! HE'S GOING TO BREECH THE WALL!
(Back down at the scene at hand, we see Urak-hai Member#74 running in slow motion towards the well, with the Olympics Theme Song playing in the back round. Many of the Urak-hai Members are cheering him on. Many of the defenders of the keep are shooting arrows after arrow at the Urak-hai Member, but he pushes on, undaunted by the many arrows that are stuck within his neck or skin. When he is able to reach the well, Urak-hai Member#74 dives into the well with the torch. There is a great BOOM! and an explosion of fire and spark, and Urak-hai Member#74 goes flying, screaming hysterically)
Urak-hai Member#74: (As he goes flying) This wasn't part of the deal!
(The wall then begins to crumble at a fair section, causing many Men or Woodelves to parish and fall down. Jimagorn then realizes what must be done)
Jimagorn: (Brandishing his sword and speaking to the Woodelves behind him) Ready yourselves and follow me!
Woodelf Soldier#45: (Rolling his eyes as he looks at Jimagorn) If this is about the blue mail gloves-!
Jimagorn: (Angrily) No! Follow me into battle! (Makes to go, but stops, and turns around) But-you haven't seen them, have you?
(We go back to the breech in the wall, where Urak-hai Members are crawling over the rubble and wading through the water to get inside the outer wall. But Jimagorn is able to meet them head on, accompanied by Megolas, Brimli, & Commander Awry. The forces behind Jimagorn, a very good number of them, line up obediently and make to attack. An Urak-hai Member shoots an arrow, that almost gets Jimagorn in the head, but he turns away in seconds. But Jimagorn's flip has been nicked. Jimagorn places a quivering hand upon the flip and glares at the opposing force. With a great shout, Jimagorn places his sword in the air and yells for the forces behind him to attack. The Woodelves begin their assault, and many of the citizens and soldiers join the fray, trying desperately to defend the keep. We then experience a change in scenes and see the Fangorn Forest, in the dead of night, and we go back to the Entmoot. Many of the Ents are in a circle. Jessie Brandybuck & Rippin Took are off to the side. Rippin Took is sitting at the base of a huge tree, and Jessie Brandybuck is pacing about nervously, occasionally taking her glasses off and cleaning them in nervousness. Rippin Took doesn't seem too worried however)
Rippin Took: (In a simple, non caring tone) Hoover dam, Grand Coulee dam, Brandywine dam, Shire dam, Isengard dam, stone dams, stream dams, beaver dams, wooden dams, rock dams, creek dams, great river dam, concrete d-
Jessie Brandybuck: (Irritably) Will you stop talking about dams already?
Rippin Took: (With a scowl upon her face) What else could I do with my spare time? If anybody needs to recite different dams, it's you!
Jessie Brandybuck: (Frustrated) Damn it, Rippin-!
Rippin Took: (Furrowing her brow) That's not a dam!
Jessie Brandybuck: (Deciding to let this slide) Don't you understand, Rippin? The decision of this Ent Council could change Middle-Earth forever! So forgive me for being just a tad bit worried about this, okay?
(Jessie Brandybuck turns away angrily, but Rippin Took merely nods softly)
Rippin Took: (In a considerate tone) You're forgiven.
(Jessie Brandybuck gives a great sigh of anger, but doesn't say anything. Then, we see Big Nuts turn from the Entmoot and begin to slowly walk over to the hobbits)
Rippin Took: (Excitedly to Jessie Brandybuck) Jessie!
(Jessie Brandybuck turns around and quickly stands beside Rippin Took, who is straightening her shirt quickly. Big Nuts approaches them with huge steps and looks at them for a while)
Big Nuts: (In his slow, grinding voice) The Ents-have agreed.
(Big Nuts goes suddenly silent, suddenly going into a bit of a trance. Jessie Brandybuck & Rippin Took look at one another in curiosity)
Jessie Brandybuck: (In a loud, but patient tone) Yes?
Big Nuts: (Coming out of his daze) Sorry, I was wondering if I turned my stove off this morning.(Clears his throat and gets on with saying what he must say) I have told your names to the Entmoot and they have all agreed that-you are not Orcs.
Rippin Took: (With a small shrug) Er-thanks, I guess.
Jessie Brandybuck: (Irritably) But-what about Andraman? Have you reached a decision about him yet?
Big Nuts: (Waving a hand to push the matter aside) Patience, Miss Brandybuck! I'm getting there! I'm getting there!
Jessie Brandybuck: (Angrily) Well, could you get there a bit faster? I would like to know if you guys are going to do something or not, you know!
Big Nuts: (Patiently, to calm the hobbit down) Peace, Miss Brandybuck! Peace! The use of Old Entish is very complicated, indeed. And the Ents believe that there is nothing worth saying-unless it takes-a very long-time- to-say.
(And with that, Big Nuts turns away and joins the Entmoot again. Jessie Brandybuck looks quite angry at the moment)
Jessie Brandybuck: (Quietly) Well, if that's the way it is, we're going to be here for over five years!
Rippin Took: (Sitting at the tree again) Eh, what're you going to do. (Goes off naming things again) Log dams, city dams, local dams, swimming dams, fishing dams, fishing boat, fishing pole, fishing tackle, fishing net, big nets, small nets.
(Jessie Brandybuck puts a hand to her head in frustration before we go to the next scene)
