Thanks for bearing with my slack updates and all! But now, everything should run smoothly until the finale! We're nearly finished! *Sniff* but it was fun every step of the way!
"Obviously we never were meant to be after all," My eyes were sore from crying, but Cloud and I were having a 'calm and mature' discussion. He was being calm, but not always mature. I was being mature, but probably not what you would consider calm. Together we made a good couple.
No! Don't even think about that! It hurts too much…
"Even still, I don't want to lose you, Tifa. I don't want to lose you just because-" he broke off abruptly, but the unspoken words were hanging in the air. I don't want to lose you just because Vincent showed up and ruined everything. I'm not going to retaliate against what he said. I think I've already said enough. He is right, in that respect. But then again, if I had never encountered him again, I suppose I never would have truly found out what sort of a person Cloud truly was. I would have been deluded with a beautiful fantasy. And as much as fantasy is nice, it isn't always realistic, or indeed possible.
"Cloud. I thought this a while ago, and I think it is true after all. Aeris would have made a much better partner for you then me. I guess we never were meant to be, but we'll still be friends, right?"
He nods slowly, and then gasps as I lunge at him, squeezing him around the middle. "Good. I didn't want to lose you before; it's just that I suppose we didn't agree. It had to happen,"
"I don't understand how you feel… the way you do, but if that's what you want then I'm willing to accept it," he says softly, stroking my cheek. I feel the tears begin to flow again. I don't love him the way I did, not now. But more a love of brother-sister. "In some ways, I do agree with you about Aeris. At the beginning I was afraid it would end up into a big love triangle type of thing and result in you two hating each other. I'm glad it didn't, because you two are two of the people I've ever been closest to in my life. I would be a different person altogether if I had never met you and Aeris,"
We pause for a moment, thinking of the bubbly flower girl who sacrificed herself for the sake of the Planet. If she hadn't, then we wouldn't be here now… but because she did, she wasn't here now. She would know what to do with this sort of situation. She would lean forward slightly, beaming, and say something like "Kiss and make up!" and then come out with something more serious which would make everyone realise what they had to do. I sigh softly and Cloud snaps out of his reverie.
"Tifa. It's been a while… I've decided that I'm going to go to the Ancient Forest for a while, just to pay my respects to Aeris," he says softly. I nod slowly.
"She would like that, I think,"
Cloud nods, and turns to the Lunar Harp, which is standing as an ornament on our dresser, cleaned and polished. "I don't know how long I'll be, or when we'll see each other again, Tifa. But… I know we will see each other sometime again. You deserve the best, Tifa. Be careful,"
"I love you, Cloud," I whisper into his shoulder. "You be careful too,"
"Always. Soul-searching is beneficial in the long run, Tifa. Maybe you should try it too sometime? You could come with me?" he asks questioningly. It is tempting, but I can't.
"I would like to, but I think that going to see Aeris is something for you alone to do. It would spoil it if I came,"
Although I was partially expecting an argument, I got none. Just a light peck to the cheek, before he took up the Lunar Harp and was gone before I could say anything else. But his words were still in my head. "Soul-searching is beneficial in the long run." Perhaps, considering that there was nothing else to do in Kalm except run my bar, I could. Go back and relive memories, the only links left of my past. And anybody who knew me would know where that meant going. Yes, Nibelheim.
Suddenly, my thoughts went back to Vincent. Popping my head out of the door, I could see Cloud's departing back. "Hey, Cloud!" I yell across the township. "Do you know where Vincent went?"
I know I am stepping onto dangerous territory, but I don't care. Cloud luckily doesn't react angrily, he simply shrugs, although avoids making eye contact.
"He said that he was going away from you," he says softly before continuing to walk out of the town. I am stunned. I step back into the house. Does he really hate me that much? After all I did to help him…
But then again… he might have said it because he didn't want to get anyone hurt, me included…
The first option seemed more Vincent. He would always be like that, the silent enigma that stepped in and out of people's lives like a heartbeat. What made me think that we could ever live a happy life together? Vincent was just about as likely to thrive in domestic bliss as I was to begin fighting with a katana. It wasn't going to happen.
But anything was possible, right? Either way, Cloud or no Cloud, Vincent or no Vincent, I was going to go back to Nibelheim. I could go back to my house there. Everything would be fine, albeit a bit lonely…
Old habits die hard, I suppose.
