Title: Season 4 Bent Style
Episode: 4.03
Episode Title: Return To Middle Earth, Or Something Like That
Author: Bent137
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own any of it despite my acting as a writer for the show.
Author's Notes: Thanks to Roxy, who beta'd this chapter too.
Spoilers: Season Four Episode Three. Yes, I did say Season 4, as in the one
not aired at all yet.
Gilmore Girls
Episode 4.03
Return To Middle Earth, Or Something Like That
Writer: Ashley/Bent137
Executive Producer: Daniel Palladino
Director: Amy Sherman-Palladino
Starring:
Lauren Graham
Alexis Bledel
Melissa McCarthy
Scott Patterson
Liza Weil
and
Kelly Bishop
special appearance by Edward Herrmann
CLIPS
INT. RORY'S ROOM - DAY
The camera pans across the bedroom, RORY GILMORE is in bed. The door opens silently and LORELAI GILMORE enters the room. She creeps over to RORY and shakes her.
ALEXIS BLEDEL (VOICEOVER)
Previously on Gilmore Girls...
LORELAI GILMORE
Hey kiddo, get up.
RORY moans. LORELAI shakes her again.
LORELAI
Come on, you're going to be late to Yale. It's nine o'clock.
RORY sits up suddenly.
INT. NEW HAVEN - YALE - DURFEE HALL - DAY
The tour has just ended and girls are heading off in various directions. RORY heads to her suite. Another girl, TANNA, follows her. RORY notices her following her into Suite 5.
RORY
Uh, hi.
TANNA
Hi. I'm Tanna, I must be one of your suitemates.
INT. NEW HAVEN - YALE - SUITE 5 - DAY
RORY and TANNA return to the suite laughing. PARIS and a young man, TERRENCE are standing near the windows.
PARIS
Rory, surprise!
RORY
Paris? What are you doing here?
PARIS
I'm your suitemate. Aren't you shocked?
INT. SOOKIE'S HOUSE - NIGHT
LORELAI, SOOKIE, and JACKSON are drinking champagne.
LORELAI
The Independence Inn is closing. Not closing, closed. We're finished. It's all over. They're boarding the place up as we speak. I've got another little piece of news for you. We can't buy the Dragonfly because I can't swing my share of the money because I no longer have a steady income.
INT. CHILTON - DAY
LORELAI and RORY are talking in the hall.
RORY
Go put in the bid on the Dragonfly. You've got the money now, Grandpa's money.
EXT. CHILTON - DAY
LORELAI has written "We Got The Inn!" on a graduation program and is showing it to Rory.
TEASER
1 INT. YALE - SUITE 5 - DAY
RORY GILMORE comes out of her and Paris' room and heads out the door. Before she opens it it swings open and a girl, JANET, comes in.
JANET
Oh hi, I don't think we've met. I'm Janet.
RORY GILMORE
I'm Rory.
JANET
Pleased to meet you. I'd hug you or something, but I'm all sweaty. I just finished jogging. It's so beautiful out this morning. Very crisp and fall like.
RORY
I see, I'd love to chat Janet-
JANET
But you've got to get to class, and I've got to take a shower. I'll see you later.
RORY
Yeah, later.
JANET heads for her room. RORY leaves.
2 INT. YALE - CLASSROOM - DAY - MUSIC: SAM PHILLIPS CUE
RORY enters apprehensively. She's the only one there. She double checks the number on the door and takes a seat at the end of a long table. It has chairs all down one side, facing a black board. She sets her things down and begins to read. After a moment she squirms and looks around. She's still the only one there. She goes back to reading but quickly stops and puts her book back with her things. She begins gathering her things to leave when a boy, MARTY comes in and sits at the opposite end of her table. RORY settles back in. MARTY fiddles with his notebook as RORY goes back to reading. She keeps glancing at him over her book. Finally she sets it down and opens her mouth to say something when the door opens and an older student comes in. He begins placing papers at each seat. He's obviously the T.A. He barely glances at RORY or MARTY as he puts papers at their seats. When he's finished he goes to the door.
T.A. (MUTTERING)
Freshmen. So predictable.
He leaves.
3 INT. SOOKIE'S KITCHEN - DAY
SOOKIE ST. JAMES-MELVILLE and LORELAI GILMORE are at the table. Papers are spread over it and they're signing them.
LORELAI GILMORE
Are you all set for the party this afternoon?
SOOKIE ST. JAMES-MELVILLE
Definitely. I'll probably change the menu a million times between now and then but you know me.
LORELAI
It's Lord of The Rings themed remember.
SOOKIE
Got it.
LORELAI
And if you need any help with ideas, well, ask Dean, because I slept through most of both movies.
SOOKIE
Okay, making a mental note. You don't know anything about Lord of The Rings.
LORELAI
Aside from Viggo Mortenson's hot? No. One more signature and we're all set.
SOOKIE signs with flourish.
SOOKIE
That's it. The last one. Now they can start remodeling the inn.
LORELAI
Well, these are just quotes, and applications and, I'm not really sure. Maybe I should have asked Luke for help.
SOOKIE
Maybe that would have been a good idea.
CREDITS
ACT ONE
4 INT. YALE - SUITE 5 - DAY
There's a knock at the door. TANNA answers it. EMILY GILMORE is on the other side.
TANNA
Hello. May I help you?
EMILY GILMORE
Hello. I'm Rory Gilmore's grandmother.
TANNA
Oh, was she expecting you? Because she's at class right now.
EMILY
Oh no, I thought I'd surprise her. You mind if I come in, look around, wait for her.
TANNA
Oh no, of course not. Come on in.
TANNA lets EMILY in.
TANNA (CONT.)
Everyone's out except me. I'm sorry, I can't stay and entertain you, I have a class to go to as well.
EMILY
That's fine. Education is very important. Go ahead.
TANNA
Thank you Mrs. Gilmore. Have a nice day.
EMILY
You too dear.
TANNA grabs her bag and leaves. EMILY waits a moment then goes back to the door. She motions for someone in the hall to come in. Two MEN come in.
EMILY
Please take out this old furniture and bring in the new.
MAN 1
Yes Ma'am.
5 INT. YALE - SUITE 5 - DAY
RORY and JANET run into each other outside the door.
JANET
Well hello again Rory.
RORY
Hello Janet.
They enter the suite and stop.
JANET
What the heck happened?
RORY
I have no clue. I wonder if Paris or Tanna did it?
PARIS GELLAR comes up behind them.
PARIS GELLAR
Did what?
RORY and JANET move aside. Most of the living room furniture is gone. In it's place is a red couch with black cushions, two different funky chairs, one purple and yellow, one red with a foot stool. There's also a coffee table shaped like a stack of books and two matching end tables.
PARIS (CONT.)
What the -
RORY
Paris.
PARIS
Who stole our furniture?
JANET
Oh yeah, thieves really like to steal crappy dorm furniture and leave real expensive stuff in it's place.
Before PARIS can respond TANNA comes out of her room.
RORY
Tanna? Did you do this?
TANNA
No, it was like this when I got back.
RORY
Who did this?
TANNA
Maybe your Grandmother?
RORY
My what?
TANNA
Your Grandmother, she was here today. Didn't you see her?
RORY
No.
PARIS
Rory, she's right.
PARIS hands RORY a note. It reads "Hope you like the new furniture. Call me! See you Friday. - Grandma."
RORY
I can't believe she did this! That is so typical.
PARIS
What is?
RORY
She always does things she thinks are for my own good without even asking me. Like remember my birthday party?
PARIS
Oh, yeah. That was her?
RORY
None other.
PARIS
Poor you.
RORY
I'm sorry guys. I really am. If you want it back I'll get it back. I'm make her bring it all back and take this stuff away. She has some nerve-
JANET
Rory, breathe. It's okay. At least, with me. I kind of like it.
TANNA
I like it too.
PARIS
Me three. It's kind of funky, yet still functional. She may do things without asking you Rory, but your Grandmother has some taste.
RORY
Are you sure? Was any of the stuff yours?
TANNA
The couch was mine, but I bought it at a garage sale, so this is definitely better.
RORY
Okay, as long as everyone's happy.
TANNA, PARIS, and JANET nod.
RORY (CONT.)
Okay, excuse me.
RORY goes to her room.
6 INT. YALE - RORY'S ROOM - DAY
RORY picks up the phone and dials. Intercut with LORELAI at Luke's.
LORELAI
Lorelai's Odd Jobs, you got somethin' that needs doin' we'll do it.
RORY
Mom?
LORELAI
Hey sweetie what's up? And give me the condensed version I don't have much time.
RORY
Grandma came today.
LORELAI
Uh oh.
RORY
Yeah.
LORELAI
What'd she do?
RORY
Replaced all the furniture in our common room.
LORELAI
You're kidding.
RORY
I'm not. I wish I were.
LORELAI
How angry is everyone?
RORY
I'm the only one angry. Everyone else is fine with it.
LORELAI
Amazing. Look, I gotta get going. I gotta go to work but-
RORY
What work?
LORELAI
Sookie and I are catering a Lord of The Rings themed birthday party. Listen, take some pictures with your digital camera and send them to me. Once I see them we'll discuss how much butt I need to kick okay?
RORY
Okay mom.
LORELAI
Love you sweetie.
RORY
Love you too.
LORELAI
Bye.
7 INT. STARS HOLLOW - BIRTHDAY PARTY HOUSE - DAY
LORELAI is sitting on the couch amidst cardboard cut outs of characters from the movie and balloons. A box labels "LOTR Costumes" is at her feet. Next to her is a BOY dressed as FRODO.
LORELAI
Come on give me the ring.
FRODO BOY
No.
LORELAI
Come on, you can trust me.
FRODO BOY
I said no.
LORELAI (GOLLUM VOICE)
But I needsss my precioussss.
FRODO BOY looks at her funny.
LORELAI
Come on. Gollum? You know. Nevermind.
FRODO BOY
It sucked.
LORELAI is about to respond when a woman, HELEN walks in with two more boys.
HELEN
Here's two more Hobbits for you.
LORELAI
Great. Let's get you guys all dressed up.
BOY 1
I want to be Aragon!!
BOY 2
No! I'm Aragon.
BOY 1
Nu uh, Me!
LORELAI
Boys, calm down. One of you can be Aragon. One can be Legolas. Can you decide that amongst yourselves?
The boys glare at each other.
LORELAI
Okay. We'll flip a coin.
She pulls a quarter out of her back pocket.
LORELAI
When's your birthdays?
BOY 1
March 5th
BOY 2
January 14th.
LORELAI points at BOY 2.
LORELAI
Call it.
She tosses it in the air.
BOY 2
Heads.
LORELAI catches it and looks at it.
LORELAI
Heads!
BOY 2
Yes! I'm Aragon.
LORELAI
and I'm Lorelai
A GIRL dressed as ARWEN who was playing with cards on the floor looks up.
ARWEN GIRL
You said your name was Julie.
BOY 1
Well it's Lorelai, you stupid head.
ARWEN GIRL
I was here before you! She told me she's Julie, our cruise dictator!
LORELAI
Director.
ARWEN GIRL (CONT. IGNORED LORELAI)
Besides. I got a gold star in spelling, you got a happy face.
BOY 1
So?
ARWEN GIRL
Everyone knows Gold Stars are better!
LORELAI
Kids. Now, it doesn't matter if I'm Lorelai or Julie or even Gandalf. You should play peacefully and lovingly. Because the Lord of The Rings is all about peace and love.
FRODO BOY
Nuh, uh, it's about the destruction of all mankind.
LORELAI sighs deeply and Helen comes up and pulls her aside.
HELEN
Did you bring swords? Because some kids are asking for them.
LORELAI
No, I didn't.
HELEN
Good.
HELEN smiles at LORELAI.
END ACT ONE
ACT TWO
8 INT. STARS HOLLOW - BIRTHDAY PARTY - DAY
LORELAI is sitting in the middle of the floor struggling with some fabric and a trashcan. Nearby some kids are playing with plastic swords. Sookie walks through with a platter of food.
LORELAI
Hey Sookie.
SOOKIE
Hey hun.
HELEN comes in and kneels next to LORELAI
HELEN
Um, what are you doing.
LORELAI
I'm disguising this trashcan as "Mt. Doom" so we can play a game where the kids throw their swords in it.
HELEN
Okay, let me help. It's my husband's fault anyways.
LORELAI
Nah, it's no problem.
HELEN
Yeah it is. He's like a big kid.
They glance to where a MAN is fencing with a boy using plastic swords.
LORELAI
It's almost done.
She adjusts it a little.
LORELAI
There. Why don't you get them started and I'll go check on things in the dining room.
HELEN
What do I do?
LORELAI
I don't know, tell them the swords are evil and influencing them to make bad decisions and they have to get rid of them by throwing them in Mt. Doom?
HELEN
Okay. Kids, gather round. We're going to play a game.
LORELAI goes into the dining room. SOOKIE is setting a candle on the table. The table's covered with a white tablecloth and has two silver platters on either end.
LORELAI
Sookie hun, whatcha doin'?
SOOKIE
Setting the table.
LORELAI
I see that.
There's a pause as LORELAI looks at it slightly concerned.
LORELAI
Well, carry on.
9 INT. YALE - SUITE 5 - DAY
PARIS comes into her and RORY'S room, laden down with books. She sets them on the bed and turns to RORY, whom is on her own bed reading.
PARIS
Hey.
RORY
Hey.
PARIS
Did you hear about the party?
RORY
Yup
PARIS
First party of the year.
RORY
Wow.
PARIS
Held on our floor.
RORY
That's what the flier said.
PARIS
So, is it okay to leave the door open?
RORY
I'd really rather not. It'll be noisy, and there'll be people wandering around and-
PARIS
I get your point.
PARIS picks up her phone and dials.
PARIS
Hi, Lorelai? Paris. Yeah I'm doing good. Birthday party? Oh have fun. Oh, the first party of the year is on our floor and I want to leave the door open, but Rory said she'd rather not, what do you think? Really? Should I tell her that? Okay. Rory, she thinks you're a stick in the mud who needs a little fun.
RORY
As if you're actually talking to my mother.
PARIS holds out the phone, RORY takes it.
RORY
Hello? Mom. Yeah, okay. Alright have fun. Right. Love you too. Bye.
RORY hangs up PARIS' phone and hands it back to her.
RORY
Fine, leave the door open.
PARIS
Thank you Rory.
10 INT. YALE - DURFEE HALL - MID PARTY - NIGHT - MUSIC: DIDO - WHITE FLAG; MANDY MOORE - HAVE A LITTLE FAITH IN ME
PARIS is leaning against the wall outside Suite 5. The crowd parts and Madeline and Louise come rushing up to her.
MADELINE and LOUISE
Paris!
PARIS
Guys! What are you doing here?
LOUISE
Enjoying the party.
MADELINE
Yeah there's some hot guys here.
PARIS
I should have known. Hold on a minute.
PARIS leans in Suite 5.
PARIS
Rory! Come here.
RORY comes out.
RORY
What?
She sees Madeline and Louise.
RORY
Madeline! Louise! I didn't think I'd see you.
MADELINE
I know, small world huh.
RORY
The smallest. Do you go to Yale?
MADELINE
Oh no, we're just in town for the party.
LOUISE
So you and Paris are roommates?
RORY
Yeah, amazing huh?
LOUISE
Sure is. Listen, we're going to go, uh, party. We'll stop by on our way out.
RORY
Bye guys.
LOUISE and MADELINE disappear into the crowd.
PARIS
I'm going to go mingle too.
RORY
Okay.
PARIS goes in the opposite direction of MADELINE and LOUISE. RORY sighs and leans against the wall. Across the hall and down about 7 feet she spots MARTY. She pushes off the wall and heads towards him. Suddenly her path is interrupted bye two blond girls, MICKEY and KICK, who are twins.
MICKEY
Hi. Are you Rory Gilmore?
RORY
Yes.
KICK
Gil?
MICKEY
Rickey?
RORY
Excuse me, what are you doing?
KICK
Oh we're just trying to give you a nickname.
RORY
and you are?
KICK
I'm Kick, and she's Mickey.
RORY
Okay. Um, am I supposed to know you?
MICKEY
Well, my real name's Michelle, Mickey's just a nickname. Like Kick is just a nickname for Kirsten. We got them in Cheerleading.
RORY
I see, I still don't know how you seem to know me.
KICK
Your grandmother asked for us to look for you.
RORY
Look for me?
MICKEY
Our mother is a friend of Emily's, they're in the DAR together. When she found out we were going to Yale she asked us to look you up and make sure you fell in with the right crowd.
RORY
I see. Um, I have to go find my roommate.
RORY heads back to Suite 5. MICKEY and KICK follow her. RORY sits on the couch and they sit on either side of her.
KICK
Wow, cool furniture. Yours?
RORY
My grandmother bought it.
MICKEY
She has great taste. If only our mother did.
RORY looks back and forth between the two then towards the door. With a sigh she settles into the couch.
KICK
Out mother's taste is so heinous.
MICKEY
She painted our hallway eggshell. Really, who uses eggshell anymore?
KICK
Aside from Hilda on Trading Spaces.
MICKEY
Eggshell is so out.
KICK
Antique white is so in.
11 INT. YALE - SUITE 5 - PARTY - NIGHT - MUSIC: WHITE STRIPES - 7 NATION ARMY
PARIS is standing in the middle of a group of people.
GUY 1
There's really no money to be had in criminalistics, it's become a glamour job.
GUY 2
What's so glamourous about wading around in blood and bile.
PARIS opens her mouth to say something but someone interrupts her.
GIRL 1
It's all these crime dramas. They make is seem so fancy. I mean, have you seen the heels Marg Helgenberger wears on C.S.I. Seriously now.
GUY 2
Oh yeah, I've seen them
GUY 1
Anyone who majors in criminalistics is an idiot.
GIRL 2
Oh yeah, and interior design is so much better.
PARIS sighs and slinks out of the group looking annoyed. She walks over to where MICKEY and KICK are still sitting beside RORY.
KICK
Then there was the Debutante ball in Boston.
MICKEY
That was a hoot!
KICK
Tess McKerson's dress ripped on the way down the stairs.
MICKEY
Everyone could see her black lace thong.
PARIS taps RORY on the shoulder.
PARIS
I'm not having fun.
RORY
Well, the party's not over.
PARIS
I guess you're right. What's with Jessica and Elizabeth?
RORY
Their mother is friends with my grandma.
PARIS
Oh. Everyone's got a group but me.
RORY
What do you mean?
PARIS
Well you're here with the junior Hilton sisters, Janet's a runner so she'll be with the jocks near the keg, Tanna's a freak so she's in the John Nash group. I have nothing but bad talk radio.
RORY
What about the smart people?
PARIS
What smart people?
RORY looks around.
RORY
Maybe they all stayed in. You know, if you want I can kick everyone out so we can go to bed.
PARIS takes a deep breath.
PARIS
No, I'll just have to try harder. I want things to be different this year.
RORY
They will be.
They smile but are interrupted by a drunk guy stumbling over to PARIS
GUY 3
Will you pierce my ear?
PARIS and RORY stare at him.
PARIS
That's it! Everybody out. Gather up your gross beer, your inane conversations, and your pathetic attempts at wittism and leave! Now!
PARIS physically pulls MICKEY and KICK up from the couch and shoves them to the door.
MICKEY
But we're with Rory!
RORY
Sorry guys, I think it's best if you go. But I'm sure I'll see you around campus.
MICKEY and KICK are the last two out the door. PARIS shuts it behind them then turns to find RORY sitting on the couch smiling happily.
END ACT TWO
ACT THREE
12 INT. STARS HOLLOW - BIRTHDAY PARTY - NIGHT
The kids are gathered in front of the TV watching "The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers." They are completely entranced by the movie. In the doorway HELEN and LORELAI are watching them.
HELEN
The food should be ready when the movies over.
LORELAI
Absolutely. Excuse me.
LORELAI walks to the dining room and looks around. There are platters all over covered with fancy looking food such as quail eggs, blanched vegetables with lemon garlic aoli etc. LORELAI looks concerned and approaches SOOKIE.
LORELAI
Sookie honey?
SOOKIE
Yeah.
LORELAI
Where's the kids' table?
SOOKIE
Oh there is no kids' table. I'm mixing and matching, I thought it would be easier that way.
LORELAI
Uh, okay, where's the kids' food?
SOOKIE
Relax, I haven't gotten it out yet.
A MAN brings in a platter of gravlox.
SOOKIE
Thank you.
The MAN leaves.
LORELAI
What is that?
SOOKIE
It's the kid's food silly.
LORELAI looks striken but before she can say anything to Sookie ARWEN GIRL walks into the kitchen.
ARWEN GIRL
I'm hungry.
SOOKIE holds out the platter of gravlox
SOOKIE
Here you go honey.
ARWEN GIRL
What's that?
SOOKIE
It's gravlox.
ARWEN GIRL wrinkles her nose.
ARWEN GIRL
Ew. I don't know what that is.
LORELAI
Sookie, where's the rest of the food?
SOOKIE
In the kitchen.
ARWEN GIRL takes a carrot off of the blanched vegetables platter and licks it. She makes a face and puts it back.
ARWEN GIRL
This stuff tastes like diapers.
SOOKIE looks horrified and starts hyperventilating. LORELAI runs into the kitchen and comes back with some crackers.
LORELAI
Here you go honey. Now go back in and finish watching the movie.
ARWEN GIRL takes the crackers and goes back into the living room. LORELAI wraps an arm around SOOKIE and leads her to the kitchen where she gives her a paper bag to breathe in.
LORELAI
Calm down Sookie.
LORELAI looks around spying the MAN from earlier and a WOMAN. They are garnishing platters of food that does not look like normal kids' food. LORELAI wanders over to them.
SOOKIE
What are you doing?
LORELAI
Where's the kids' food?
SOOKIE
That is the kids' food!
LORELAI
I'll be right back.
She exits out the back door.
13 INT. DOOSE'S MARKET - NIGHT
LORELAI is next in line at the counter. She sets her basket on the counter and TAYLOR, who is working the register, begins ringing up cans of frosting, sprinkles, and boxes of frozen finger foods.
TAYLOR
I thought you were catering a birthday party on Ann St.
LORELAI
I am, we just needed some last minute supplies.
TAYLOR
Last minute supplies? Looks like all the food was last minute.
LORELAI pays him.
LORELAI
Well, not the adult food.
LORELAI leaves and TAYLOR looks after her funny.
14 INT. STARS HOLLOW - BIRTHDAY HOUSE - NIGHT
The kitchen is bustling as LORELAI fills a dish with something and the MAN helper takes another to the dining room. A buzzer goes off.
LORELAI
That's the cupcakes. Get them out and cool as quick as you can.
She tosses the mitt to the WOMAN helper. SOOKIE hovers nearby.
SOOKIE
Great I'll frost them.
LORELAI
No you won't. We're going to let the kids do that.
SOOKIE
Well, what can I do?
LORELAI
Help me take some of this food to the kids.
SOOKIE
Great.
She grabs the platter of gravlox. LORELAI takes it from her and gives her a bowl of pizza bites.
SOOKIE
What are these?
LORELAI
Pizza bites.
SOOKIE
But I had kid food.
LORELAI
But it was weird kid food Sookie. Kid's don't eat weird food.
SOOKIE gets upset and starts blinking back tears. LORELAI sighs and takes back the pizza bites handing them to the MAN helper.
LORELAI
Sookie, I don't mean anything by taking over like this. You're a great chef, when it comes to fancy food. Kids are hard though. They don't like weird things. If they can't tell what it is, they don't eat it. I had an eight year old. She had eight year old friends, and lets face it, my tastes are not that far from an eight year old's! This will work.
SOOKIE
But I am a great chef!
LORELAI
You are!
SOOKIE
Great chefs do not let the client decorate their own cupcakes!
LITTLE GIRL 1 walks into the kitchen.
LITTLE GIRL 1
Can I have a juice box?
SOOKIE
There is perfectly fine lemonade out there.
LITTLE GIRL 1 stares at her a moment then scrunches up her face. Her chin wobbles and her face turns red as she opens her mouth.
SOOKIE
What's she doing? Is she sick? Why's the mouth open?
LORELAI hurries over to the fridge and gets a juice box. She hands it to the girl who immediately relaxes and leaves the kitchen. LORELAI turns to SOOKIE.
LORELAI
Sookie, you and I need to have a little talk.
SOOKIE
We do?
LORELAI
Yes, I'm going to explain some things to you.
SOOKIE
What things?
LORELAI
Things about kids. Things like kiddie food.
END ACT THREE
ACT FOUR
15 INT. STARS HOLLOW - BIRTHDAY PARTY - NIGHT - MUSIC: SAM PHILLIPS CUE
LORELAI and SOOKIE are sitting on the back porch alone.
SOOKIE
Maybe I'm not cut out for this. Oh god, what am I doing? I can't be a mom! I know nothing about kids.
LORELAI
It's okay Sookie. I didn't know anything about kids and look how Rory turned out.
SOOKIE
Thanks. I'm still worried though. Rory was a fluke. My kid probably won't be that nice, or quiet, or smart. Oh man. What am I going to do? I'm going to have a loud obnoxious dumb kid! My kid's going to be a bully. I'll be getting calls from the school and parents.
LORELAI
You won't if you teach him or her not to be a bully.
SOOKIE
Can I do that though? I don't know if I can. Maybe I wasn't meant to be a mom. I'm not a teacher, and I'm not patient.
LORELAI
If you weren't meant to be a mom you wouldn't have gotten pregnant. Besides, you don't have to be a teacher, or be patient. I was 16 when I had Rory so we all know I wasn't a teacher and even now I'm not patient.
SOOKIE
What was it like?
LORELAI
What was what like?
SOOKIE
Having this little, person, so dependent on you for everything.
LORELAI
It was incredible. There's really nothing like it. I mean sure, at first it's daunting and you're tempted to hate the little guy or girl for putting you through so much pain and putting you into this position which you can't get out of. Then the nurses will clean your baby all up and hand it to you and you'll gaze into those little eyes and wonder how you functioned without him or her.
SOOKIE
Really?
LORELAI
Really. The rest will come naturally, well, fairly naturally. It's like
an animal instinct, but of course, being humans, we had to make it as
complicated as possible.
SOOKIE
Thanks, that makes me feel a lot better.
LORELAI
No problem sweetie.
16 INT. RORY AND PARIS' ROOM - NIGHT
RORY and PARIS are getting ready for bed, folding down covers, brushing hair, etc.
RORY
You know, Paris?
PARIS
Yeah?
RORY
I don't really have a group either. So you have nothing to worry about. Besides, I don't think we've been here long enough to make many friends or have a group. Unless it's some crazy sorority or a doomsday cult.
PARIS
Rory?
RORY
Hmm?
PARIS
Are you and I friends?
RORY
Sure we are. That is if you want to be?
PARIS
I do.
The two girls turn out the light and get into their beds. The room is silent a moment.
PARIS
Rory?
RORY
Paris?
PARIS
I'm sorry.
RORY
For what?
PARIS
For treating you so badly in high school. It really wasn't about you, you know. I was just jealous.
RORY
Let's save this conversation for another time okay?
PARIS
Okay.
17 INT. RORY AND PARIS' ROOM - NIGHT (LATER THAN PREVIOUS SCENE)
RORY wakes up and gets out of bed. She shoves her feet into her slippers and pulls on a robe.
PARIS
Rory?
RORY
Just going to the bathroom, go back to sleep.
PARIS
Okay.
RORY goes out through the common room and into the hall. She stops suddenly. MARTY is on the hallway floor completely naked, asleep. RORY nudges his shoulder gently with her slippered foot. MARTY wakes up and looks up at her.
MARTY
Huh? Where am I?
RORY
The first floor of Durfee.
MARTY
I fell asleep
RORY nods.
MARTY (CONT.)
and I'm naked.
MARTY looks up at RORY whom nods.
MARTY (CONT.)
Where are my clothes?
RORY shrugs.
RORY
No clue.
RORY takes of her robe and drapes it over him.
RORY
I think you need this more than me.
MARTY
Thanks. You're in my class right? The um, one with the professer? Crap. I can't remember.
RORY
American Literature 101.
MARTY
Yeah that's it.
RORY
Yeah I am. I'm Rory.
MARTY
I'm Marty.
RORY
Nice to meet you?
MARTY
I'll return the robe.
RORY nods and heads down the hall.
18 INT. RICHARD GILMORE'S OFFICE - DAY
RICHARD GILMORE is sitting at his desk. There's a knock at his office door.
RICHARD GILMORE
Come in!
His secretary, KAREN, pokes her head in.
KAREN
A Jason Stiles is here to see you.
RICHARD
Really? Send him in.
KAREN exits. A moment later JASON STILES enters.
RICHARD
Jason. What brings you here?
JASON STILES
Richard, long time no see.
RICHARD
Yes, yes. Now excuse me for not asking how your father is but as you have probably guessed he and I are not on very good terms.
JASON
Yes, I guessed as much. When I took over your job at the company-
RICHARD
You took over my job?
JASON
Yes, but that's not why I'm here.
RICHARD
Then why are you here?
JASON
I would like you to help me screw over my father.
RICHARD
I see. Is there a reason?
JASON
Yes. He's done a great deal to piss me off lately, and frankly I think he's running the company into the ground.
RICHARD
So is this a petty father son dispute?
JASON
Only that in I happen to be his son. Will you help me?
RICHARD
I'll see.
JASON
Thank you. So, how's Emily and Lorelai?
RICHARD
Emily's fine. As is Lorelai.
JASON
I remember when we were kids she used to call me 'Digger.'
RICHARD
Well, she's got a child of her own now. She named her after herself,
but we call her Rory.
JASON
Great. What grade is she in?
RICHARD
She's a freshman at Yale.
JASON looks stunned.
JASON
Wow, Lorelai was what? 15.
RICHARD
16.
JASON
Wow, that is young. Well, I have a meeting to get to. I'll call you with more details.
RICHARD
Okay, I'll tell Emily and Lorelai you asked after them.
JASON
That'd be great, thank you Richard. Have a nice day.
RICHARD
You too.
JASON leaves, RICHARD looks thoughtful.
END
Guest Starring:
Katherine Heigl - Janet
Wayne Wilcox - Marty
Ian Vogt - T.A.
Olivia Hack - Tanna
Tim DeKay - Man 1
Bret Loehr - Frodo Boy
Patrick Stogner - Boy 1
Jake Thomas - Boy 2
Carly Schroeder - Arwen Girl
Margaret Easley - Helen
Shelly Cole - Madeline
Teal Reddmann - Louise
Diane Klimaszewski - Mickey
Elaine Klimaszewski - Kick
Craig Hauer - Guy 1
Bourke Floyd - Guy 2
Fanny La Croix - Girl 1
Lindsay Sloane - Girl 2
Taylor Handley- Guy 3
Michael Winters - Taylor
Dakota Fanning - Little Girl 1
Evie Peck - Karen
Chris Eigeman- Jason Stiles
