'Don't let her do it! We'll be locked up for sure!'
Instead Miss Kaoru grabbed the hair and yanked. Off balance and slightly annoyed, I was dragged after her. About half the town people meandered along with us. Hornet stings. Fire ant bites. Minor things. I also noticed that the half was completely male. So that's the way it was.
The clinic was nice if a bit cramped. The lady doctor pursed her lips and sifted through the patients with practiced ease. I winced at some of the things she said to move the hang-ons out, but they just leered. I guess this happened a lot.
She paused at me and lifted a cool brow. "So, would you like me to remove some leeches? You know some clothing would have to go with them."
Kaoru snarled. I didn't quite understand that. She'd known me for less than twenty-four hours.
Before I could answer, Sano thrust himself in between us with a cocky smirk.
'This should be good.' Battousai smirked.
"What do you want Rooster-boy? Shouldn't you go to the local veterinarian? I don't treat animals you know."
"What about in bed?" He suggested slyly.
Without a word she pulled out some brandy and started to pour it on his stings. Being the initial target of the irate wasps he had amassed a lot of them. He did a sharp intake of breath, and glared at her as the alcohol coated the sore insect stings.
"What the hell did you do that for Foxy?" He demanded once he could speak again.
She smiled evilly, "I had to disinfect them of course."
"How 'bout you dis- dis- infest my mouth then?" He grinned and she groaned. "It's disinfect rooster-head. Infest would be all those earwig babies eating your brains."
She turned her back to him and his hand dropped to her ass. To the causal observer it would have looked an accident, but after the experience I'd had the evening before, I knew better.
"You're sagging Fox."
Her eyes and lips narrowed drastically. Instinctively, I hid behind the nearest person. Aoshi looked on with his stiff expression. He didn't seem intimidated.
Drawing herself up primly, Miss Megumi drawled in Sano-imitation, "I'm surprised you even know what a lady feels like cockhead." Ouch. "I always figured you as a boy-toy."
His mouth dropped. This was below the belt and everyone knew it.
"I'm not gay Megumi!" He snarled completely pissed. I wondered if he really was. Gay I mean. He was deigning it an awful lot today. For a second it looked like he was going to punch her before he got hold of his temper. Fear flashed behind her eyes and he was immediately repentant, "'M sorry Fox."
She brushed him off silently and made her way towards me. Nothing like being treated by a doctor who just had an emotion blow out with the town drunk.
Squirming away from her, I peered fearfully at the bottle in her hand. She ran her hand up my arm lightly before clamping an iron grip on my shoulder. There was no getting away. Not unless Miss Kaoru dragged me.
"I don't recall see you around here before." She purred. How could you turn such a bland sentence into sounding like an intimate conversation? Her fingers worked around my pants and I got nervous. Hadn't I seen a scalpel floating around earlier? "Relax." She urged and I tensed. "It's just some salt for you leeches." Why didn't that reassure me?
Amazingly it worked.
"So what's your name?" She asked as she looked at my fire ant bites and swollen ankles. I noticed Miss Kaoru was on the other side of the room pretending not to watch us. I noticed Miss Megumi also noticed. A sly smirk crossed her face. "I think you might be contagious. I volunteer the clinic until you're deemed fit for society!"
"Oro!" I was never getting out of this psychotic little town.
"Now wait just a minute here!" Miss Kaoru demanded crossing the room with amazing speed. I wondered if that time of the month gave women super powers. "He's MY boarder."
"Ohoho, is he now?" She grinned in triumph. "I'm the doctor and in charge of the welfare for this town. How could I let someone with a potentially harmful disease just walk out?" She made a mock gasp, "Why, I'd be doing a civil disservice!"
How about a personal disservice?
"This unworthy one would not take up the bed of another." I lamented. I noted the look of relief on Miss Kaoru's face. The logical part of me realized she just wanted my money. And that's the way it should be! She was young and joyful and young… I'm not a pediphile here!
Miss Megumi's smug look slipped at my solid case and she looked vaguely disappointed that she couldn't stir up some mischief with me. Within an instant her attentions were diverted and she minced up to Yahiko.
The boy was staring at her guarded clutching one arm with his hand. I assumed Miss Kaoru was guilty of any damage done since he had escaped the killer wildlife unscathed.
"Let me look." Miss Megumi commanded and he mutely held out his arm. She poked it gently and he winced.
Whisking away she returned with what looked suspiciously like a toothless saw.
"I'm afraid this requires amputation. Now, what would you like to numb the pain?" She said seriously.
Yahiko's face paled and he backed up until he hit Sano who was still sulking. He grabbed the boy by the shoulders, "Hey, Fox quit teasing. Can't ya see ya scared little Yahiko out of his little mind?"
"I'm not little!" Yahiko snarled, the bone saw completely forgotten. He launched himself upwards and latched onto Sano's head gnawing furiously.
Seeing as they were occupied, I figured I could possibly make a good escape. My leeches were gone and Miss Megumi had powdered my swollen feet with what smelled like borax. The white powder coated my feet, but at least the stinging had stopped. They don't call them fire ants for nothing.
Oh my way backing out I bumped into something rather tall and solid. Without turning I knew it was Aoshi. I wondered briefly what he was still doing here. He didn't seem hurt. Unless he was just concerned for the well being of his flock. Pfft, yeah right. He was as caring as a block of ice.
"This unworthy one is sorry to have bumped into you." In more ways that one.
The taller man's cold blue eyes flickered over me and I blinked disarmingly, "Takani did not give you permission to leave."
So I needed permission? Wait, I'm a guy, and I don't care if she's a doctor, I could leave when I wanted! Couldn't I?
I opened my mouth to reply, but was cut off by a very frantic looking Miss Misao. Her blue eyes darted around the room wildly before landing on Megumi. She rushed over and grabbed the doctor by her shoulders. "Megumi, Jiiya needs your help!"
"What has the old man done this time?" The lady doctor shook her head and deliberately placed items in a ratty, black medicine bag.
"Well, he was chasing a skirt…" Miss Misao began animatedly. She bounced along still worried, but seemingly to lose the frantic edge now that Megumi had been recruited. Aoshi trailed along behind them like a silent wraith.
Slowly, so as not to draw attention to myself I edged out. A firm hand grabbed my ponytail and I stopped. Turning slowly I came face to face with a rather annoyed Miss Kaoru.
"Where do you think you're going?" She hissed, her eyes darting to the rest of the people in the clinic. "You haven't paid me yet."
Oops, so I hadn't.
"My money is back at your ranch, that it is." I murmured, "This unworthy one could go retrieve it…"
"Not so fast buster! Who's to say you won't just make a run for it?" She demanded loudly drawing the attention of several people.
"Oro!" I yelped, hoping that was annoying other people as much as it was myself. Honestly, I had to keep up a harmless mask, but saying some stupid word over and over was just a wee bit tiresome.
"Hey Missy, I'll go. Make sure this rascal pays you fair and square." Sanosuke grinned eyeing me.
"You're one to talk! I'm going too. That Ugly doesn't know anything." Yahiko retorted.
Great, just wonderful in fact. Those two would "help". It reminded me of the saying; helping is hurting. I had the feeling I'd be the one hurting. That Sano looked like he wouldn't mind using his fists a bit.
As we neared the ranch something nagged at me. Something was wrong. Someone was around. Someone who was not supposed to be because they meant harm.
Stopping my "escorts" and Kaoru I stared with hardened eyes. I simply couldn't allow them to go in when my instincts were on red alert. There didn't seem to be anything amiss.
"Stay here." I commanded in a serious, no nonsense voice. I would suck it up and play the unworthy one later when it didn't matter. This was deadly business. I didn't think anyone knew I was here besides Aoshi and Saitou. If either wanted to confront me they would do so honestly.
Darting forward, I thoroughly searched the small house with my gun drawn and nerves on end. The hairs on the back of my neck prickled, but I didn't find the intruder. In fact, everything seemed to be the way it was left. Or at least until I took a closer look at my few possessions. They were neatly arranged, almost exactly the way I left them. However, after the war I had taken to arranging things in very specific order. Someone had moved them. I could tell.
"It's alright Miss Kaoru." I called out in a cheerful tone and reemerged on the porch. She huffed, but I could tell my actions had really startled her. Sano sauntered over, but stiffened slightly, before relaxing again. So I wasn't the only one.
"You jerk!" Miss Kaoru screeched truly taking me by surprise for once. I jumped out of my skin and barely missed being smack on the head with a length of wood she had in her hands. Where'd she find that stuff? I could have sworn the yard was clean and plank-free before.
"Woah there Missy."
"Don't you start with me you slacker!" Miss Kaoru yelled turning on the unfortunate young man. He didn't seem bothered at all. Even when she crashed the plank over his head and snapped with wood in half.
My mind was occupied with other things while they fought. Who had broken in and why? I had a hunch they knew who I was.
It wasn't until we were inside that it was made apparent that something was actually taken.
Miss Kaoru rushed out of her room in tears. Sano caught her by the shoulders but she jerked away. I felt helpless watching her sob, but wrapping my arms around her wasn't right. She didn't know me.
"What's wrong Missy?"
"My- my mother's locket is gone!" She bawled, completely distraught. I wondered why they would take a locket. What sort of importance was a piece of jewelry? Even if it were expensive… unless whoever stole it actually wanted Saitou involved. I liked the looks of this less and less. The wolf had accumulated enemies just as powerful as I myself had and this particular one was after both of us. That meant they were either incredibly foolish or very confident.
"I'll go get Saitou." Yahiko announced and bolted out the door before I could stop him. Saitou was after all the closest thing to a policeman, although I very much doubt he would appreciate being dragged in for such a petty matter.
Meanwhile, Miss Kaoru had not stopped in her hysterics. Sano had backed conveniently out the door with some pretense of finding Megumi leaving me alone with the sobbing woman.
"That… that was my… mother's," hiccup, "And… she's dead…" gasp, "That's all… all I have left."
"We'll find it Miss Kaoru." I assured her as cheerfully as I could manage. What I wasn't expecting was for her to do a dive bomb onto my chest and latch onto the cloth of my shirt like a distressed toddler seeking comfort. At the risk of being slapped, I carefully wound my arms around her lending support.
And that was how Saitou and Megumi found us.
-Common painkillers in hospitals were chloroform or ether (then again they could just stick a strip of leather in your mouth and amputate your leg with a bone saw ^.^;;) -Common painkillers in small towns were morphine, laudanum, or alcohol (all very addicting substances) -In the 1870s women were just being allowed into male dominated Medical Universities (there were Women Medical Universities at the time, but they were few and all located in the East) -Circumcision started in the US during the 1870s (just thought that was an interesting fact)
Author's Note: There you go, Megumi got a bit of spotlight (and don't worry, she'll be getting a lot more in a few chapters). Hey, not only that but an inkling of a plot! W00t. I'm running out of pre-made chapters ;.; so I may not be able to update quite so fast anymore.
The Weird One2: Ah yes, the uninspired reviews, I've done a few of those. Unfortunately, as the author I have a duty and obligation to reply to your reply! Mwahaha, as for historical accuracy, I care ^^;; Not too much obviously, but I'd rather not get nailed. I was talking with my mom and she commented that fire ants were still in S. America -.-;; I pointed out duct tape (which she was trying to convince me to add) probably wasn't even invented yet. I'll have to look into that. No story is complete without duct tape!
Trupana: I said romance ^__^;;; Aoshi's a priest with priestly obligations (like I actually know what those are). As far as I know he's not allowed to have relations at the risk of burning in the bowels of hell forever. Eternal damnation, I love that phrase. Meg will get some action, so will Sano, so I hope that makes up for it a bit. I think your suspicions about Hiko-sama and drink and a nine yr old Kenshin-chan involved a bit of gender confusion are well founded O__O Misao scares me. Her perpetual motion and manners make me tired just watching her. Of course, I'm just a lump of anti-energy. What about precocious? That starts with P. Battousai thinks many things, most of them unflattering. Someone may actually end up strangling the girl if she bounces around too much. Hehe, I never thought of them like that. I should have added locusts then, shouldn't I? We got the blood (leeches). I thought about titling it that actually. Ah, so you got that! I don't actually know if hornets are detoured by smoke, or even ciggy smoke, but bees get sleepy with smoke. Just another 'lil bit of useless knowledge' I picked up somewhere. I would pay to actually see Sano attacked by hornets. Oh the woes of being my fav. char. You get picked on ceaselessly! (okay, so y'all now know my fav. character and it's not Kenshin). Really, no pressure, I'm easily amused! But yours really crack me up ^__^
Riverwood: Doesn't that sound utterly ominious? Clinic time >:) And you haven't seen weird yet. I just wrote a new chapter yesterday evening. That was flat out scary.
HarukoNigihayami: I'm still amazed they are all still alive ^___^
Fyyrrose: I know you like torture/rape/bondage/etc., but this is pg-13 here (for lang. and sexual implications). Go read my poke fic if you want gore. Or wait for me to work on the vampire/werewolf one (no, I haven't given up). Saitou could back the suckers down without the ciggy *starts laughing* I see someone has it out for him. I thought you didn't like FKB? No bears were harmed in the making of this fic, he didn't die, although he might wish he would. I take excellent care of my animals *smirk* I'm not the one bitting poor Jiffy. G-chan, Crickie, Shadow, Meeks, Leo, Middys, Rainbow, and Nuffie-poops love me! Oh, and HK, although I don't think she knows who I am exactly half the time.
MissBehavin: So do I (so long as I wasn't in the middle of them that is). I think Aoshi will switch to coffee after that. Oh yes, the favored fire ant dance. I can't decide which is worse: stepping in the nest without shoes or with them. The little turds get all stuck in your socks... Oh yes, plenty of experience living in South Carolina. No fire ants in Kansas thank goodness. I've never been stung (not for lack of trying *pokes nest with stick, runs like hell*). I even 'escorted' this big moma sucker (about as long as my pinky finger and as fat as my thumb) out of the garage. That was hilarious because I had a group of cheerleaders urging me on (from behind the plastic screen might I add, cowards).
