A/N: Sorry about the delay to those who complained . . But it's a long chapter! And I promise the next one will be up in a week, two weeks. For those who want more explanation on stuff, or it's unclear, I'm TRYING to work on a website to clear everything up, but I really suck at that stuff so I might just end up posting a chapter explaining stuff that's unclear. Sorry! But enjoy . . . ^_^

*********************************************************

I swept out into the main room again, comfortable in my green satin - duchesse satin, I knew, thanks to Lady Jainalii - gown, which was, Lady bless, dry. My reapplied make-up and borrowed jewelry gave me confidence as I was ready to demand to know where Johen was. Even if my feelings toward him had changed, I still needed to talk to him. And I didn't know if my feelings HAD changed. Maybe I did still love him. Certainly remembering all those times together filled me with warmth. He was so familiar, so much part of my life . . .

Aiven wasn't in the room, however, so I couldn't demand to know where Johen was. I peeked into his chamber, but couldn't see him there, either.

I started to close his door, but curiosity got the better of me. He'd never know if I just peeked around a little bit . . . The room was decorated in silver and white, which was a little boring to my eye. It was, however, impressive. A tall arching ceiling and a little fountain in the room made in seem more like an indoor courtyard then a bedchamber. On a table desk to the bed - which had three steps leading up to it - there was a clear ball.

My eyebrows rose as I looked at it. In Yvonhe, whenever the rare topic of Seers came up, we mentioned them seeing through a crystal ball. But then, the common stereotype had them as wizened old blind men as well.

The crystal - if it was that - looked exactly like what a Seer's seeing glass ought to. It was set on a cradle, a little stand with four dragons snaking out to hold it in place. The ball itself was clear in some parts yet milky in others, and throughout it was streaked with the colors of the rainbow, changing forever as I tilted it. Only the veins of gold seemed to stay in place.

"What are you doing?"

I shrieked and dropped the crystal, watching aghast as it splintered into a thousand pieces. The colors seemed to spill out of it and vanish, and the gold veins splintered off from the crystal, looking like hot molten gold on the silver rug.

I raised my eyes to Aiven's, horrified. What if he wouldn't be able to see anything now that I'd ruined this? What if it was dreadfully important, or one of a kind, and it could never be replaced and this was just positively TERRIABLE -

"Damn," Aiven said calmly, picking up one of the shreds and examining it closely. He sighed. "Oh well. I was about due for someone to break this one. I suppose I'll have to order another one."

"Aren't you going to throw a fit?" I said in a small voice.

He glared at me. "I do not "throw fits." besides, it would be pointless. You'd only retaliate by screaming louder and my eardrums would break."

I gave him a withering look, but was still afraid I had gone too far by breaking the crystal. "Will you still be able to See?" I asked. What if his powers were all centered in this ball? That was how the bards' tales went . . .

He gave me a startled look, then laughed. At my look of offense - I was really worried that I had made his powers disappear - he laughed even harder, sinking down into the carpet.

"What?" I asked, annoyed.

"You honestly believed those stories about Seers and crystal balls?"

"Why not?" I asked, glaring at him again. I don't like being laughed at.

"It's just . . . the whole purpose -" one look at me made him break out in fresh laughter.

I sat down on the floor near him, exasperated. Obviously I'd just have to wait until he was done laughing. I'd probably wrinkle my duchesse satin dress beyond repair, but I didn't care right now.

When he finally regained his breath, Aiven explained. "It's a joke, in a way. Everyone seems to expect certain things from Seers - the clothes we were, the runes we write, carrying staffs, seeing through crystal balls and using certain talismans - we sort of go along with it. The crystals especially. They're very impressive to people, who usually think it's the source of all our power and whatnot. They're wrong of course. The crystals are just for decoration, as are most of the other things we have. We all buy them from companies in Jayklin, and try to outdo each other in what we have . . . The people who make all these things make quiet a tidy profit. "

I stared at him open mouthed. "You're kidding."

"Certainly not," Aiven said with a smirk. "It's all used to impress people. And you should see Jayklin. It's a city-country, where the Seers live, and the people who support us. There are many different merchant stores specializing in robes and staffs and jewelry . . ."

"That's outrageous!" I exclaimed. "So it's all for show?"

"Isn't everything in life? Kings buy their fine clothes and their palaces and their falcons, we buy other things. People just expect mystical things to be connected to them."

"Then how DO you See?" I asked warily.

"I can't answer that."

"Why not?" I demanded.

"Because you aren't a Seer."

"When did you figure that out?" I asked sarcastically. "Come on Aiven, do you always have to be so mysterious?"

"Yes," he said shortly, all humor leaving him suddenly. "Why were you in my room?"

"I was looking for you."

"And going through my things?"

"All I did was look at the crystal, which you've admitted can be replaced."

He glared at me. "It will be expensive."

"Oh, the horror, the terror," I said sarcastically. "Can't you just make a call through the fire saying, "please send me a new crystal," and have it directly shipped here?"

Aiven drew himself up to his full height, looking at me disapprovingly. "That would be a Mage's work," he stated. "Not the Seer's."

"Ooh, sorry. My mistake." After a second of looking at each other, Aiven smiled slightly.

It struck me that I really LIKE his smile.

"Uh, Aiven?" I began softly, a little hesitant to bring up this new subject. "Um, see, before we leave, I'd really, REALLY like to talk to Johen. I just don't exactly know where he is."

Aiven watched me silently.

"That was my very obvious hint to tell me where he is," I prompted.

Aiven just shrugged, sitting next to me on the bed. "I don't know where lover-lad is," he said sarcastically. "I asked about him, but he was filling in for one of my regular servants. It appears he is one of the palace servants. A scullery boy," he said, hard-pressed to contain his glee as he pronounced Johen of that particular rank.

I frowned at him. "By the Lady, Aiven, it's not funny! He is not just a scullery boy. He has been one of my closest companions for as long as I've lived."

"One?" Aiven said, amused. Much as I liked seeing him smile, I'd rather he wasn't laughing at my friends or me.

"Yes, one," I repeated glaring at him and flipping my titan hair over my shoulder. "The others were my best friend Tari and her brother Dein. And I want to be able to talk to Johen, because he has obviously suffered a lot and I want to be able to help him."

"You don't care when *I* suffer," Aiven grumbled.

I looked at him in surprise. "You don't suffer," I told him firmly. "You're far too noble and aloof to do that."

"Was that an insult or a compliment?" Aiven asked suspiciously.

I widened my golden eyes knowing they would make a dear jealous, and fluttered my eyelashes soulfully. "Would I insult you?" I said, full aware that the look I was giving him coupled with my bell-like tone of voice was more then equal to melting men into eager pools of complacency.

Aiven however, just gave me proof that unlike most men, his heart was not made of muscle, nor even ice, but instead really, REALLY hard stone that and a burning point way past where I was able to count. He didn't appear enchanted, or suddenly freeze or anything like that. Instead he laughed, patted my hand patronizingly, and said, "O'course no, little 'un," in a pronounced country accent, before ruffling my hair.

"Thanks," I said sarcastically, reaching up and patting my hair back into place. There go my womanly charms. "Do you know were he is or not?"

Aiven flopped backwards, sprawling across the bed. "Nope," he said with a cat-like grin and looking incredibly un Seer-ish. "But you're free to search the kitchens for him until our departure at noon."

"Then I'd best be off," I said, jumping off his bed and leaving his room without a glance back at him, head held high.

Of course, as soon as I left the room I slowed my pace, waiting for him to come after me. To my pathetic disappointment, he didn't.

*******************************

The kitchens were very big, very full, very hot, and filled with people giving the gold-eyed lady in duchesse satin odd looks. Why wouldn't they? I suppose I did look a tiny bit abnormal wearing a green gown with sweeping sleeves and an elaborate hairstyle in the middle of several large rooms were the people wore aprons and sweaty faces.

"Pardon, but can I help you, m'lady?" one kitchen lass said, bobbing a curtsy and giving me an angry look. Unlike the other girls, her pretty blond hair was braided into six separate braids, whipping up and down as she moved.

I scowled. I wanted nothing more then to dress in normal - COMMON - clothes, an act as I usually did, I still felt like I was impersonating a lady, rather then being one. Still, there was no reason the six-braided blond should be giving me such an angry look. Yet the girl reminded me of myself; I had never been that fond of nobles either, and hated when they invaded my space.

"I'm looking for a youth," I said shortly. "Blond hair, blue eyes, taller then me. His name is Johen. Do you know where he is."

Six Braids glared at me and shook her head. She began to walk away, but not quick enough - as if I couldn't tell she was lying!

I caught her arm. "Where is he?" I demanded, looking around the kitchen as if he might pop into sight.

She wrenched her arm away. "Why do you want to see him, *m'lady*?" she asked, emphasizing my title as if it was an insult or something.

I rolled my eyes. "Because he's my friend," I said slowly, as if I was talking to a two-year-old.

"Nobles like you aren't "friends" with us folk," Six Braids spat angrily. "Johen's gone through a lot of pin, but don't think that I'll let some stuck up snob me even more cruel to him."

How long had this girl known him? Around a month or something? I hadn't done a single impolite thing - excluding the grabbing her arm bit, but that was provoked, - but I was getting close. "DON'T help me," I muttered as Six Braids stomped away, then I started to search the kitchens for him.

It was a little boy who finally showed me where Johen was - sitting on a narrow stairway and holding his wrist. His eyes were closed and he was gasping in pain as the colorful jewel shone.

"Johen," I said, taking his hands. He looked as if he was about to pass out. "He clenched my hands tightly, shudders wracking his body. Suddenly his eyes rolled up and he began to cough violently. "Johen," I whispered tightly, releasing one of his hands to touch his cold, damp forehead. In an instant, a wave of heat washed his body, turning his face red and making his temperature burn. I grabbed his trembling hand again, holding them both tightly and staring at my friend with huge frightened eyes.

Shuddering one last time he let out a terrifying scream, sounding like the cry of a demon. It went on and on, his body convulsing. I could not help but let go of his hands to grab my ears, praying that the dreadful wailing would cease.

It did, and abruptly too. All of a sudden, it was Johen sitting before me again; breathing hard, but himself nonetheless.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," he muttered, trying to stand but collapsing again on the steps.

"It' s that stone, isn't it? Who did this to you?" My voice was rising; I was dangerously close to hysterics. "We MUST get it removed, immediately! You can't live like this!"

This time, it was he who took my hands to comfort me. "It's okay, Lael," he whispered, stroking my cheek. "It's okay."

"It's NOT!" I exclaimed tears glistening in my eyes. "You're in pain, eternal suffering - you expect that not to bother me? Someone MUST be able to get rid of it."

"No," he said sadly. "It takes an incredible amount of money to remove it, and more often then not, the person dies from the procedure."

"It will kill you anyway!" I screamed, then took a deep breath. "Oh Johen," I said brokenly, and turned my face away to hide the tears that I could no longer blink back.

I couldn't believe this was happening, couldn't believed that wicked Quov'in stone imbedded in his wrist. The pain that it inflicted was legendary, horrifying . . . And here was Johen, bearing one. Johen, who had always been strong, filled with laughter and mischief, was now turned into a wounded, screaming youth suffering from untold agony. He had been taken to Shi'Gallen - I didn't even want to think about what had happened to him at that place, what he had undergone . . . and all because of me.

It was then that Six Braids interrupted us. "What are you doing to him?" she demanded angrily, rushing up the stairs to where we sat and glaring down at me.

Johen looked up in surprise, and all of a sudden I felt him clothe himself in another personality, a safe, comfortable one, at ease with the pain inside him. "You've met Dirlenne?" he said in surprise, looking at me.

"You know her? Six Braids said, catching her breath "How?"

He looked at her wryly. "I've known her for more years then I've know anyone, girl," he said calmly. "Why d you ask?"

Six Braids's - Dirlenne's - mouth fell open. "I - I -" she stammered.

"Can you make my excuses to Cook?" Johen said when she obviously could not go on. "I don't think I'll be helping with the rest of the meal preparation."

Biting her lip, Dirlenne nodded and left.

"That wasn't very nice," I chided once she was gone. "The lass obviously likes you."

He grinned, but I could still see pain in it. "Most girls do," he said. I refrained from mentioning that most girls would be too scared to let themselves like someone burdened by a Quov'in stone.

"How did you get that?" I softly asked, reaching out and touching the jewel's smooth surface. "Did you really -" here I stopped, wincing, "- you know, put it in . . . yourself?"

He looked away, up the staircase. "It was the only thing I could do," he bit out, and I heard the pain and sorrow and memories in his voice. "I thought anything could be better then Shi'Gallen, and when I watched the Mage with that other boy, it seemed like such a simple thing . . . I thought no pain could be worse then what I had already felt." He looked at me, but his eyes saw into the past. "I only did it to escape - stupid, STUPID, and while I left Shi'Gallen, I will never, never leave the ag -" a shudder wracked his body as it had earlier. "The agony," he finished, lowering his face into his hands.

I regarded Johen soberly. It was my fault; completely, utterly, without a doubt. Had Johen not been trying to protect me from the royal Yvonhe soldiers, he would never have been taken away in the first place. Never sentenced to what was often referred to as the worst prison on the continent, where not only were the bodies of the prisoners damaged, but also their minds . . . What had happened to Johen? It was better not to ask. I was no soul-doctor, to help him with his past troubles and difficulties. I could only do what I could to help him now.

"I *will* help you," I swore, our eyes meeting. "I have to leave, have to go to Bast . . ."

"With that Seer," Johen said, face and voice angry.

"I have to!" I exclaimed. I continued, quieter, "There is this prophecy, this web of war and good and evil which I am, though Lady forbid, unfortunately completely tangled in. I don't want to be, I don't, but there are foretellings of who I am and what I will do - oh, Johen, I don't know how to explain! He's a Seer, THE Seer, and the rest of them are all royals and Mages or both, and all I want to do is go home to our life with Tari and Dein and live like we used to, but I can't. I am not given a choice."

He looked at me stonily. "There is always a choice."

"Well, yes, but if I chose the wrong thing the world will become corrupt and evil and - well, WRONG. And don't know yet how I'm supposed to prevent that, but if I can, I want to . . .Please Johen," I begged, "PLEASE understand. You're my oldest and closest friend, and I don't want you to turn your back on me and never speak to me again, and I don't care if I'm being selfish, that's what I want. I love you Johen - I don't know right now if it's in a romantic sense or in a brotherly way, but you're the only person whose been there as far back as I can remember. You're my family, Johen; I don't want to lose you."

He was silent for a moment, closing his eyes and clenching his hands. It was over by the time I realized he had suffered from another wave of pain. "You used to know," he said softly, opening his ocean blue eyes. "You used to love me with all your heart, most definitely NOT in a brotherly way. And we always thought that we would be happy together, and live together, and maybe even - you know . . . marry . . ." Johen looked away. "It was you that I followed; you were my only motivation to break away from the prison, you who I followed through this foreign country side until I finally caught up with you here - at this castle -" Now he met his eyes. "And I thought I would be able to overcome this pain, that I could be happy no matter what, because you would be here and everything would be all right, but instead . . . *you're with him*. The Seer, the most powerful man in the kingdom. Young, handsome, powerful, rich . . . He's taken you and turned you into a fine lady, into HIS, into some piece in his prophecy, and he's obviously started to steal your heart as well . . ."

I could only stare at him, brokenly, trying to swallow the tears and not succeeding. He had been wrong about some of the things, wrong about what he'd spoken of Aiven. He had not turned me into a lady, and I certainly was not his . . . but some of the things spoken brought back so many memories. It was only my own fault that I did not know how I loved him now, and he did not deserve my betrayal. Johen was right, we HAD always been together, but now I was not sure how deep it had been, if that was true love, the romantic kind. But i did love him, and I wasn't sure I could live, leaving him alone like this, in pain, and selfishly I did not want him to be angrily with me . . .

"I am sorry," I said, staring at my hands. "Please, Johen, please, I have to go, I WANT to, but don't hate me." The tears slipped out, ungracefully and my broken hiccuping sobs didn't help. "Forgive me."

He watched a second longer, before leaning forward and circling me with his arms. "It's all right Laeli," he murmured. "I might have followed you, but it was never you're fault. It wasn't your fault that I was taken to Shi'Gallen or that I have the Quov'in stone; don't ever think that. I love you Laeli. And you don't need to ask my forgiveness, ever. We a thief- family, and we stick together." He tucked the strands of hair that had gotten loose from my clips and braids behind my ears. "I love you, Laeliena. And I want your love too, but -" here he struggled, as if he didn't want to say the words, "if you love another, well, I wish you happiness." He kissed my cheek, softly, like a butterfly wing. "Go to Bast, Lael. You've always known what was right - now you might as well do it." He smiled crookedly, pulling away. "I wonder how the most powerful Seers and Mages in the world will feel about having a pickpocket in their midst?"

He walked with me to the edge of the kitchen, then we parted with one softer kiss on the cheek. "Goodbye Johen," I whispered softly, smiling at him as I moved away, are eyes holding until I had to climb the tall, carpeted stairs. Somehow we both knew that we would not see each other for a long, long time.

*********************************************************

There were not many more goodbyes for me to make, seeing how I barely knew anyone at court. I found my way to Lord Koilun and Lady Jainalii of Jorins's room, so I could bid farewell to them.

A maid showed me into a beautifully furnished chamber full of different fabrics where Lady Jainalii sat. The pretty brunette looked up from where she sat writing a letter. "Lady Damslae!" she cried in delight, quickly putting her letter in a book and standing up to greet me. "What a delight! How are you, my dear?"

I smiled back at her. Besides her tendency to talk about cloth too much, she was the nicest woman I'd ever met - not that I'd really met many adults that could be classified as "nice," and she was the only truly motherly figure I had met.

"I'm actually leaving," I said. "I am travelling to Bast."

"So soon?" Lady Jainalii said, sounding shocked and disappointed. "I thought you would stay for a week, at least! You have not even seen my collection of exotic silks!"

I smothered a laugh. That was one thing I would not miss. "I'm sorry," I told her straight faced. "But thank you - thank you for - well, everything as we traveled. The dresses, the jewelry," showing me an example of ladies, "I will miss you."

"And I you, my dear," she said, hugging me. "I hope you have a proper escort? The Lord Seer will not be the only one accompanying you, will he?" Though her tone was disapproving, her eyes gleamed with mischief.

I laughed. "No, the second prince shall be there as well, along with a number of servants, I suppose. Good bye," I said again, curtsying.

"Oh, at least take a parting gift," she said, looking around then running into a room and returning with a gown. "Here. Do take it; one of my great aunts made it for my dowry, but the coloring was never good on me, so I never wore it, and now I have far outgrown it."

"Thank you," I said, honestly touched. No one had ever actually given me a parting gift before - with thieves it was more along the line of, "Oh, you're leaving? More victims for me, then."

"The men are out, but i will give hem your regards," Lady Jainalii promised. "I know Kieran will be so sad you have left; you must come and visit him again."

"Of course," I murmured, with no intention of doing so. We made our final goodbyes, and I went to hunt down Mariva, after giving the dress to one of Lady Jainalii's servants to take to my room. I couldn't help wondering what was wrong with all these servants as she did so. If someone handed me a gown obviously worth several old piece, especially if I didn't even work for her, I would be off to the marketplace as fast as my legs could carry me. These girls had better get good wages . . . Shaking my head, I went to Mariva's room. I didn't want to have to say goodbye to her - she seemed like she could become a very lose friend, and I'd like to spend more time with her.

"Mariva? I'm leaving now," I announced as the maid ushered me in - where did all these girls COME from? The palace must have depleted the countryside of all young women within fifty miles in any direction.

Mariva was wearing traveling clothes, a short jacket, and had several bags at her feet. She nodded. "Yes, they should be expecting us soon."

"You're coming too?" I said, surprised.

She laughed, handing her luggage to two servant boys, who took it out the door. "No, I'm just seeing you off. I'm meeting my betrothed there, Corln. Of course I'm coming with you, silly."

A wave of relief washed over me. We WOULDN'T have to say goodbye. And I'd have some pleasant company on the journey to Bast, someone I could really talk to without getting annoyed or flustered, or falling into a particular warm shade of brown eyes . . . Of course, I though, annoyed at myself, I seemed able to do that even when he WASN'T there.

Ten minutes later, the two of us were downstairs, ready to leave for the Bastian Empire.