Chapter 3

A month has passed since Keitaro's and Motoko's incident. Naru has stopped speaking to Keitaro and Motoko has made many attempts on Keitaro's a life without the other ladies' knowledge.

Motoko is sitting in her room and pondering evil thoughts.

Motoko (thinking): Keitaro has to be unkillable. I have tried deadly fish, poison darts, ninja stars and a live squid. And a sneak attack in the men's bath, which resulted in me seeing Seta nude and retreating.

Motoko looks at a bowl of fruit on her table.

Motoko (thinking): I've got it! I will poison his food. Oh god. I shouldn't think of food, because it makes me feel sick. Why I am sick when I think about food? I am going to talk to Kitsune.

Meanwhile, Keitaro hides in his room.

Keitaro: What's Motoko going to try next? She has tried so many ways to kill me. I need to stay on my toes.

Keitaro hears footsteps and a knock at his door.

Keitaro: Come in.

Kitsune walks into Keitaro's room.

Kitsune: I was just in Motoko's room and she told me to tell you that dinner is being pushed to seven o'clock and she has a surprise for you.

Keitaro: Thanks, but why is it being pushed to seven? And what kind of surprise?

Kitsune: I do not know. Motoko is cooking and said dinner will be at seven. And I can't tell you the surprise.

Kitsune walks out of Keitaro's room. As she does, Keitaro realizes something.

Keitaro: OH MY GOD! Motoko is cooking his food and has a surprise for him.

She is going to poison me. What should I do? I'd better think of something fast.

Dinner time.

Everyone gathers in the dining room and starts to eat. Keitaro carefully looks at the food on the table.

Keitaro (thinking): She wouldn't poison food all of us are eating. Therefore, I will have some rice.

After they all eat dinner, Motoko brings out desert. She gives everyone a piece of cake. Everyone looks at Keitaro's piece and notices it has a different type of frosting.

Su: Why does Keitaro get a special piece of cake?

Motoko: Because.

Su: Because why?

Motoko: Just because.

Keitaro looks at the cake and starts to sweat.

Motoko: Come on. Eat the cake.

Kitsune: Don't be rude Keitaro. Eat the cake.

Keitaro: I can't.

Motoko: Why?

Keitaro looks around the room for any excuse not to eat the cake.

Keitaro: I am full.

Su: There's always room for cake.

Mutsumi: Yes. There is always room for cake.

The ladies stare at Keitaro. Keitaro looks and sees Naru and Kitsune are angry at him. Naru starts to form fists with her hands.

Keitaro (thinking): If I don't eat this cake, they're going to kill me. If I do eat the cake, I'm going to die.

Keitaro eats it. Nothing happens to Keitaro.

Keitaro: This cake is great.

Motoko: Good. Now, I can give you your surprise. I am pregnant. Prepare to meet thy maker.

Shinobu passes out from the news. Naru's mouth drops to the ground. Motoko kicks the dinning room table on top of Keitaro, then slashes her sword at Keitaro. Her sword breaks the table in two. Keitaro realizes his life is in danger again and starts running. Motoko and the other ladies chase after Keitaro. Su eats her cake without any change in appearance.

Motoko: GET BACK HERE!

Keitaro: NO!

Keitaro turns the corner of the hall way and does not see the banana peel on the floor. He slips on the peel and crashes on his head. He looks up and sees Su hanging from the roof. He tries to get back up, but Su and Kitsune pin him to the ground.

Motoko: Prepare to meet your maker.

Keitaro: WAIT! How do you even know you're pregnant?

Kitsune: She took a pregnancy test this morning and it came back positive.

Keitaro: How do you know that Kitsune?

Motoko: I wasn't sure if I was pregnant, so I went to Kitsune for help.

Keitaro: Well, then how do you know I am the father?

Motoko: What? Are you implying that I am easy. You're the only male to have...

Motoko begins to blush and raises her sword.

Motoko: Now that everything is taken care of, prepare to die.

Naru: STOP!

Everyone looks at Naru.

Naru: Even though Keitaro is the lowest form of life, the baby still has the right to have a father.

Kitsune: True. You do have to think about the baby now.

Motoko looks at the ground, then looks at Keitaro with pain in her eyes.

Motoko: Fine. Keitaro, you will not be killed.

Keitaro: Thank god.

Naru begins to crack her knuckles and neck.

Naru: However, you will be punished

Keitaro gets on his knees and begins to beg for mercy.