GANDALF: THE MENTAL THERAPIST:

APPOINTMENT TWO:

FRODO'S ARACHNOPHOBIA:

Gandalf sighed in relief as the Elven Lord left weeping over his PMS.

"One out of the way, now I just have to get through..." Gandalf muttered as he checked over his papers, "...THIRTY MORE APPOINTMENTS TODAY!"

"Send the next in, Grace," Gandalf told his secretary over the speaker-phone.

"Mr. Frodo Bagginse, you're next."

Frodo quietly came in the door of Dr. Stormcorw's office.

"Ah, Frodo, my lad, good to see you, but not here, of all places," Gandalf said, "What troubles you?"

"I used to love spiders. I'm sure you remember Betsy, my pet Black Widow," Frodo said.

"Ah, yes, Betsy, the one that scared Pippin all the way to a straightjacket," Gandalf said in remembrance of the 'pet'.

"Yes, that one," Frodo said.

"You always did have an attraction to poisonous spiders, I recall," Gandalf said, "So, why has that changed?"

"I'm terrified of my new spider, Carmen, a perfectly harmless exotic spider," Frodo said, "And all she's done is curl up at my feet and purr."

"Curl up at you feet? How big is this thing," Gnadalf asked.

"About three feet high, she's really friendly," Frodo, "And she scares the neighbors away."

"Well, first off, Frodo, I would recommend a better taste in pets," Gandalf said, "Where on earth did you get this creature?"

"At a wonderful traveling pet store," Frodo said, "They had all things I was interested in, and she was the main attraction."

"I can imagine they have very poor business," Gandalf mused.

"Yes, well I know she's very friendly, but I can't help but feel frightened around her," Frodo said, "I am ashamed."

"After the Shelob incident. I can imagine you are terrified of spiders," Gandalf said, "Well, I may have just the thing for you."

With that, Gandalf called his secretary, "Grace, send in my 2 O' Clock appointment."

"Who," Frodo asked, turning to the door.

Shelob walked in the door. Frodo and Shelob's eyes met, and they looked at each other in horror for a moment, and then shrieked in terror. They both fainted and fell over on their backs.

"Hmm," Gandalf said, looking from one to the other, "It would seem that I nailed two birds with one shot."

Next Appointment: Shelob's Hobbitophobia.