A/N I probably should be memorizing for Drama right now. . .but, oh well! I pretty much have got it memorized already and I need something to do that's enjoyable. . .for me. Well, here it is, all the characters are getting drunk, what fun! Lol! You have no idea how much fun this was to write, but I hope you enjoy reading it. Bye!

Chapter 5: I'm Not As Think As You Drunk I Am (POV of Rachel)

The five of us (Bageera included) entered the Three Broomsticks for a little 'Yay! The bitch is dead!' party. There were more people there then we thought would be; apparently there had been a scheduled Hogsmead weekend planned before the Sue showed up.

Amazing how fast the place can clear of students when Filch comes in looking as if Christmas had come early. Unfortunately, the teachers stayed; this would prove to be a problem later.

"Drinks all around!" I called with a smile. It's not like we'd have to pay later anyway, the concept of money seemed to have disappeared a long time ago. Fawkes grabbed a drink and drank it in one gulp. It just went downhill from there. .

Two drinks later, she was on the counter singing a very drunken version of 'Ding-dong! The bitch is dead!' Something else that was very unfortunate, the teachers joined. They were drunk too. In fact, 15 minutes later, Bageera and I were the only ones not drunk; I had learned my lesson long ago. . .

~*~*~*~

Fawkes and Sarah are sitting on the Common Room chairs trying to settle a very minor hangover when Rachel comes down the stairs screaming at the top of her lungs wearing her nightdress.

Fawkes looks up and smiles, "Did you have a fun night with Seamus?" Rachel looks at her, horrified. After a few seconds her hangover takes full effect and she collapses to the ground.

~*~*~*~

Thank you, but I want to wake up alone tomorrow. I have to say though, this is getting entertaining. . .

"Who lives in a pineapple under the sea!?"

"SPONGBOB SQUAREPANTS!"

"Absorbent and yellow and pores is he!"

"SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!"

"What I'd like to know it how they all know the Spongebob theme song," I said to Bageera.

"American influence," she replied, trying to sleep. I swear that dog can sleep anywhere.

Well, I turned my attention back to 'the entertainment' just in time because Fawkes then jumped down from the bar where she had been 'dancing' and full on kissed a very surprised (and very drunk) Remus Lupin. I think I can hear the screaming fangirls from here. Oh, and now they're forming plots against Fawkes' life; Remus kissed back.

Keep in mind they've all had more drinks then they should have and Fawkes looks about 22 rather then 15. Mary-Sue disease, makes you look older (or younger, depends on how you look at it).

Note to self: stay far away from staff and Sarah and Fawkes. I'm just glade isn't Arwen here; she could have made matters even worse.

Holy crap! Is that Dumbledore dancing on the table over there? Scarred for life! Scarred for life! "Bageera, should we leave?"

"Are you kidding? This is great!" This is also getting slightly scary. Never, ever let your teachers have alcohol, especially when they're as old as McGonagall and Dumbledore (who are now doing the tango to some unheard music).

"We are the champions, my friend!" I wish Sarah wouldn't sing. She's not too good at it while sober, she's even worse when drunk.

"We should do something," I told Bageera.

"Just make sure none of them leave," said Bageera as she gave up trying to sleep and just watched. Bageera's plan was easier said then done; all of them were trying to come out in pairs (I don't think I need to explain why).

"Sarah! No!" I yelled as I tried to pull her and Dean away from the door (did I mention some of the students came back?). Sarah giggled, "Aw, come on Rachel! Don't spoil the fun!" Actually, it was more slurred then that, but if I told you exactly what she said, you'd be confused.

"Sarah, I am not letting you go through that door!"

"Sarah giggled again, "Fine then! Come on Dean, lets rejoin the party!" So Dean and Sarah went 'dancing' with everyone else.

Well, it was certainly work trying to keep everyone inside, and other people outside! I really didn't want anyone else coming in and getting drunk; there was way too many in here already!

Well, few hours passed and, eventually, everyone except Bageera and I had passed out. After making sure everyone was still alive and putting them up- right and all, I sat down; glade that I finally didn't have to keep anyone from going outside and the party had stopped. It was just my luck that people still wanted to get in. "Go away!" I shouted and many of them walked away, stunned after seeing all their teachers (except for Arwen, and Hagrid were no where to be found) passed out on the floor.

"Well," said Bageera, "you did it."

"Yeah," I said, "but it's going to be a hell of a Monday."

~

A/N Well, there it is! That only took a little while to type. Hope you enjoy it, because, like I said, I enjoyed writing it. And like I said in the last chapter: they're all drunk, so they're not out of character. Although. . .perhaps getting them all drunk was a bit out of character. . .but, whatever. This is the fanfiction world, so much can happen. Well, until next time, TTFN!

~Fawkes