Disclaimer: NONE OF THIS IS MINE!
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Chapter 1 -- Lost it
The window in the smallest room at No 4 Privet Drive was open. The young wizard sat there looking at the evening sun. He had neither slept nor eaten after he had returned to his room from Hogwart's. As he saw the sun set a tear ran down his cheek. He just could not get the picture of the fact of Sirius flying into the veil out of his head. Then his emotions caved in and he started crying. Finally he did fell asleep after crying for a few hours. He did not see his owl leave out of his open window.
Later that night Dumbledore was awakened most rudely by Fawkes. He grumbled "Leave me alone Fawkes, The window is open if you want to go out for a fly." And for this he was given a sharp pinch right on his butt. He got up lifted his wand and muttered "Lumos" and then he saw that Hedwig was there. "Harry has sent a letter. Come here and hand it over."
The owl how ever showed that it had no letter by lifting and showing her empty leg. Then she and the phoenix took off into the darkness of the night at amazing speed. Dumbledore immediately jumped up and threw some green powder into the fireplace and called Mrs. Figgs. When her head appeared over the fireplace the old man asked "There is something wrong with Harry. Have you seen anything wrong." When the answer was negative he said, "Check what he is doing. I will wait."
After sitting for 5 minutes looking into the fireplace he got the answer "He is sleeping. But he seems to be a bit thinner that usual."
"I will be there in sometime." was all Albus replied.
Harry woke up to the shrill song from Fawkes. He felt warm all over. The Phoenix was sitting on the windowsill and singing one of the most beautiful songs he had ever heard.
Half an hour later when Dumbledore arrived thought floo at Mrs. Figgs home, he was greeted with mass hysteria. Tonks was sitting outside and listening to Fawkes singing. Mrs. Figgs was shouting at Fawkes to stop or she will wake the entire street with her rambling. Dumbledore was now genuinely worried. Fawkes never acted so rash.
As the old man entered No 4, He saw that the Dursley's were busy packing and were ready to leave. Vernon looked up and yelled, "You can take that freak and go to hell we are leaving." When he saw that Dumbledore had his wand out he panicked "We did nothing. He just came and sat there in his room all day never came out. We never laid a hand on him." The old man then walked up to the boy's room and opened the door.
Harry was just sitting on the edge of the bed looking at the moon outside. Dumbledore was going to join the boy on his bead when he heard "I want to alone. Could you please take her with you also."
Dumbledore choose to give the boy his privacy and thought that he will make some tea and then take to him. The best talk is always done over some tea.
As soon as tea was done the old man went and sat in the unoccupied chair next to the boy, whose grip on his wand tightened. "I want to be alone" The old man simply "Yes. I will leave you alone after we have finished our chat."
Harry looked up to Dumbledore and said, "You will never leave me alone. Never. I know that."
There was silence between them for a while then both though had some tea. Harry never guessed that it had a calming potion added to it.
Once the cups were refilled. Harry asked, "The prophecy is one thing. Why am I such a threat to Voldemort?"
"You are prophesized to kill him."
"No. Not just that. There is something else that fuels his rage and his fear."
"The number of times that you have been able to get away from him. Then I guess."
"No. There is more. Please. You said you would tell me everything last time. But you did not. Now tell me. I beg you." asked the boy almost in tears
"You have the potential in you to be a very powerful wizard. A Very Powerful Wizard. So what is it that you want to do Harry, Why have you not eaten. Tell me what it troubling you."
"Everything."
"Like ?"
"The way you keep things hidden from me. The way Hermione and Ron treat me. The way Mrs.Weasley treats me. The way you have treated me. My Professors. Remus. Snape. Voldemort. The Wizarding world. I have read the newspapers after the fact that Voldemort was back was released. They have apologized to you, gave you back everything. Chief Warlock and all. I was better of without the knowledge of the Wizarding world. I have lost more than I have gained."
"I would not say that. You have never had friends when you were with the muggles. Now you have many."
"Ho Yes! Most of them want to be friends with the boy who lived."
"Well what about Ron and Hermione."
"They! If I was their best friend then I would have stood up and told me everything I needed to know and not hidden behind the excuse that you told me not to tell them what they needed to know. To me friendship is more important."
"Yes. All the Potters were like that. I don't suppose that you will ever forgive them for that."
"Most Probably Not."
"So now what are you going to do?"
"I want all of this to end."
"And how are you going to do that?"
"I am going to die. At least I will have peace then"
"That is a cowards way out."
Harry turned to the Old man a started yelling "Tell me if I am a coward to go straight into death more that 4 times just to prevent someone from dying or to try and stop someone."
"No but this is a cowards way out."
"No. This is me saying that I have had enough." Harry said hoarsely
"Harry. Then you will leave all those who love you and you love at his mercy. Do you want to Ginny or Mrs. Weasley dead at the feet of Voldemort? Do you want to let Bellatix get away with what she has done to you? She took away from you all that you had left."
A tiny tear ran down his cheek.
"No. No. I will wait. Yes I will. But after this is over then I will also sleep. I want to sleep with no dreams. It is there that it pains most." Then the boy lost all control he toppled onto his bed and cried his heart out. Dumbledore rose and said "I will see you soon Harry Potter. Eat some food."
That day early morning there was a meeting in Dumbledore's office. Dumbledore sat on his desk while Mr. & Mrs. Weasley, Remus, Severus & Minerva sat in front of him. They had assembled there 10 mins ago but had not spoken a word since then. Finally Remus decided to disturb the Headmaster who was so lost in thought. "Is something bothering you Albus?"
"No something. Someone & Harry Potter to be Precise."
Mrs. Weasley said, "Is something happened to him?"
Albus "Yes. His guilt has finally pushed him over the edge."
"He has not gone and done something rash, has he?"
"Well he has not eaten a morsel of food after returning home. He seem to be lost in thought, has had a few hours of sleep. And those have been filled with nightmare. He hates the Wizarding world. All of you. Me. All his friends. and Anything to do with the wizarding world. His exact words were 'I have lost more than I have gained'."
"But but bu." spluttered Molly.
"Potter has finally lost it. He will never amount to anything if you ask me."
"I don't think I will ask you to meet him in a hurry Severus. He might start this war by your blood. He never hated you. But you have successfully managed to push his so much that he has placed you on the same level as Voldemort and Bellatix"
"Ha. He could not do that even if he tried."
"Well I don't agree with you. Severus"
"No you don't and why may I ask"
"He will surpass me and Voldemort in power. His emotions Anger, frustration, determination is really fueling it now. I felt it when I was sitting in his room. Once he is at his maximum. I dare say that he could even rival Merlin."
"Impossible" Remus said.
Snape had lost all the color on his face.
"No. But I am not worried about that. The boy has lost all his will to live. That is what I don't want. He says he wants to sleep without dreams and it is in his dreams that he pains most. Now he is the closest to going over to the dark side."
Molly said "Ron told us that he has been having a lot of nightmares lately. I am sure that you know who is doing this. Like he did last time."
"No. He had would a barrier so hard around him that nothing will break it. I tried."
"We need to sort this problem out instead of bickering about the problem", Minerva said
"For Now I suggest that all of us sit and wait." Dumbledore replied
Later that morning Ron got a letter from Harry saying just one thing
"Dear Ron.
I have a lot to think about. You know all that I need to think about also. I need to be with myself for some time. I will not be sending any letters to you or Hermione or anyone else. Please don't send me any mails either. Thanks for being my friend
Your Friend.
Harry"
Ron went down to the kitchen and said "Bloody Hell, Who does he think he is. I will not send him a mail again. I don't want to be his friend. This is how he thanks me for coming with him and almost loosing my life to some brain in a jar."
Ginny had read this mail and spoke "I agree with Ron. We are not pushovers."
Mr. Weasley then said "Ho Really. Ron you think you are better that Harry. You envy him for his fame. His money. The way women fawn over him. Now I ask you a simple question. Do you want to trade places with him?" Before Ron could speak his father put up his had and quieting the boy and saying "Think like this. He never had any parents. You know how the Dursley's treated him. He has no brothers or sisters to love him. The world looks at him as if he is either mad or some kind of angel that will save them from all this. Who have you lost? No one. When I was in the hospital you came running to me. When Ginny was in the Chamber you went head first into the chamber of secrets. The world has been wrong to him. He has lost everything that meant anything to him. His parents, Sirius. Tell me now. Do you want to change places with him. Do you think you have it in to shoulder the weight of the world? You also know how he shrugs always all his fame. He would want to be treated like a normal person. He wants a normal life"
To this Ron or Ginny had no answer
Hermione's House was even worse after a letter similar to Ron's
Hermione was pleading to her parents to let her to go Harry's House "No. That boy has said that he need the space and you will give it to him."
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Chapter 1 -- Lost it
The window in the smallest room at No 4 Privet Drive was open. The young wizard sat there looking at the evening sun. He had neither slept nor eaten after he had returned to his room from Hogwart's. As he saw the sun set a tear ran down his cheek. He just could not get the picture of the fact of Sirius flying into the veil out of his head. Then his emotions caved in and he started crying. Finally he did fell asleep after crying for a few hours. He did not see his owl leave out of his open window.
Later that night Dumbledore was awakened most rudely by Fawkes. He grumbled "Leave me alone Fawkes, The window is open if you want to go out for a fly." And for this he was given a sharp pinch right on his butt. He got up lifted his wand and muttered "Lumos" and then he saw that Hedwig was there. "Harry has sent a letter. Come here and hand it over."
The owl how ever showed that it had no letter by lifting and showing her empty leg. Then she and the phoenix took off into the darkness of the night at amazing speed. Dumbledore immediately jumped up and threw some green powder into the fireplace and called Mrs. Figgs. When her head appeared over the fireplace the old man asked "There is something wrong with Harry. Have you seen anything wrong." When the answer was negative he said, "Check what he is doing. I will wait."
After sitting for 5 minutes looking into the fireplace he got the answer "He is sleeping. But he seems to be a bit thinner that usual."
"I will be there in sometime." was all Albus replied.
Harry woke up to the shrill song from Fawkes. He felt warm all over. The Phoenix was sitting on the windowsill and singing one of the most beautiful songs he had ever heard.
Half an hour later when Dumbledore arrived thought floo at Mrs. Figgs home, he was greeted with mass hysteria. Tonks was sitting outside and listening to Fawkes singing. Mrs. Figgs was shouting at Fawkes to stop or she will wake the entire street with her rambling. Dumbledore was now genuinely worried. Fawkes never acted so rash.
As the old man entered No 4, He saw that the Dursley's were busy packing and were ready to leave. Vernon looked up and yelled, "You can take that freak and go to hell we are leaving." When he saw that Dumbledore had his wand out he panicked "We did nothing. He just came and sat there in his room all day never came out. We never laid a hand on him." The old man then walked up to the boy's room and opened the door.
Harry was just sitting on the edge of the bed looking at the moon outside. Dumbledore was going to join the boy on his bead when he heard "I want to alone. Could you please take her with you also."
Dumbledore choose to give the boy his privacy and thought that he will make some tea and then take to him. The best talk is always done over some tea.
As soon as tea was done the old man went and sat in the unoccupied chair next to the boy, whose grip on his wand tightened. "I want to be alone" The old man simply "Yes. I will leave you alone after we have finished our chat."
Harry looked up to Dumbledore and said, "You will never leave me alone. Never. I know that."
There was silence between them for a while then both though had some tea. Harry never guessed that it had a calming potion added to it.
Once the cups were refilled. Harry asked, "The prophecy is one thing. Why am I such a threat to Voldemort?"
"You are prophesized to kill him."
"No. Not just that. There is something else that fuels his rage and his fear."
"The number of times that you have been able to get away from him. Then I guess."
"No. There is more. Please. You said you would tell me everything last time. But you did not. Now tell me. I beg you." asked the boy almost in tears
"You have the potential in you to be a very powerful wizard. A Very Powerful Wizard. So what is it that you want to do Harry, Why have you not eaten. Tell me what it troubling you."
"Everything."
"Like ?"
"The way you keep things hidden from me. The way Hermione and Ron treat me. The way Mrs.Weasley treats me. The way you have treated me. My Professors. Remus. Snape. Voldemort. The Wizarding world. I have read the newspapers after the fact that Voldemort was back was released. They have apologized to you, gave you back everything. Chief Warlock and all. I was better of without the knowledge of the Wizarding world. I have lost more than I have gained."
"I would not say that. You have never had friends when you were with the muggles. Now you have many."
"Ho Yes! Most of them want to be friends with the boy who lived."
"Well what about Ron and Hermione."
"They! If I was their best friend then I would have stood up and told me everything I needed to know and not hidden behind the excuse that you told me not to tell them what they needed to know. To me friendship is more important."
"Yes. All the Potters were like that. I don't suppose that you will ever forgive them for that."
"Most Probably Not."
"So now what are you going to do?"
"I want all of this to end."
"And how are you going to do that?"
"I am going to die. At least I will have peace then"
"That is a cowards way out."
Harry turned to the Old man a started yelling "Tell me if I am a coward to go straight into death more that 4 times just to prevent someone from dying or to try and stop someone."
"No but this is a cowards way out."
"No. This is me saying that I have had enough." Harry said hoarsely
"Harry. Then you will leave all those who love you and you love at his mercy. Do you want to Ginny or Mrs. Weasley dead at the feet of Voldemort? Do you want to let Bellatix get away with what she has done to you? She took away from you all that you had left."
A tiny tear ran down his cheek.
"No. No. I will wait. Yes I will. But after this is over then I will also sleep. I want to sleep with no dreams. It is there that it pains most." Then the boy lost all control he toppled onto his bed and cried his heart out. Dumbledore rose and said "I will see you soon Harry Potter. Eat some food."
That day early morning there was a meeting in Dumbledore's office. Dumbledore sat on his desk while Mr. & Mrs. Weasley, Remus, Severus & Minerva sat in front of him. They had assembled there 10 mins ago but had not spoken a word since then. Finally Remus decided to disturb the Headmaster who was so lost in thought. "Is something bothering you Albus?"
"No something. Someone & Harry Potter to be Precise."
Mrs. Weasley said, "Is something happened to him?"
Albus "Yes. His guilt has finally pushed him over the edge."
"He has not gone and done something rash, has he?"
"Well he has not eaten a morsel of food after returning home. He seem to be lost in thought, has had a few hours of sleep. And those have been filled with nightmare. He hates the Wizarding world. All of you. Me. All his friends. and Anything to do with the wizarding world. His exact words were 'I have lost more than I have gained'."
"But but bu." spluttered Molly.
"Potter has finally lost it. He will never amount to anything if you ask me."
"I don't think I will ask you to meet him in a hurry Severus. He might start this war by your blood. He never hated you. But you have successfully managed to push his so much that he has placed you on the same level as Voldemort and Bellatix"
"Ha. He could not do that even if he tried."
"Well I don't agree with you. Severus"
"No you don't and why may I ask"
"He will surpass me and Voldemort in power. His emotions Anger, frustration, determination is really fueling it now. I felt it when I was sitting in his room. Once he is at his maximum. I dare say that he could even rival Merlin."
"Impossible" Remus said.
Snape had lost all the color on his face.
"No. But I am not worried about that. The boy has lost all his will to live. That is what I don't want. He says he wants to sleep without dreams and it is in his dreams that he pains most. Now he is the closest to going over to the dark side."
Molly said "Ron told us that he has been having a lot of nightmares lately. I am sure that you know who is doing this. Like he did last time."
"No. He had would a barrier so hard around him that nothing will break it. I tried."
"We need to sort this problem out instead of bickering about the problem", Minerva said
"For Now I suggest that all of us sit and wait." Dumbledore replied
Later that morning Ron got a letter from Harry saying just one thing
"Dear Ron.
I have a lot to think about. You know all that I need to think about also. I need to be with myself for some time. I will not be sending any letters to you or Hermione or anyone else. Please don't send me any mails either. Thanks for being my friend
Your Friend.
Harry"
Ron went down to the kitchen and said "Bloody Hell, Who does he think he is. I will not send him a mail again. I don't want to be his friend. This is how he thanks me for coming with him and almost loosing my life to some brain in a jar."
Ginny had read this mail and spoke "I agree with Ron. We are not pushovers."
Mr. Weasley then said "Ho Really. Ron you think you are better that Harry. You envy him for his fame. His money. The way women fawn over him. Now I ask you a simple question. Do you want to trade places with him?" Before Ron could speak his father put up his had and quieting the boy and saying "Think like this. He never had any parents. You know how the Dursley's treated him. He has no brothers or sisters to love him. The world looks at him as if he is either mad or some kind of angel that will save them from all this. Who have you lost? No one. When I was in the hospital you came running to me. When Ginny was in the Chamber you went head first into the chamber of secrets. The world has been wrong to him. He has lost everything that meant anything to him. His parents, Sirius. Tell me now. Do you want to change places with him. Do you think you have it in to shoulder the weight of the world? You also know how he shrugs always all his fame. He would want to be treated like a normal person. He wants a normal life"
To this Ron or Ginny had no answer
Hermione's House was even worse after a letter similar to Ron's
Hermione was pleading to her parents to let her to go Harry's House "No. That boy has said that he need the space and you will give it to him."
