Spiraling into the Realm of Hatred
Chapter Two
Kagome ran until she hurt. Ran until her legs begged her to stop . . . to stop and fall to the sopping ground. Her heart beat rapidly in her chest, painfully slamming against her ribcage, but she ignored it. She ignored it all. There was no stopping her now, the village was far behind and the forest was inky and dark. Black. Searing rain fell upon her body, washing away the sweat that no doubt poured from her, mingling with the salty tears that screamed down her face as she sobbed.
Running.
It was the furthest she had ever ran before. It was everything that had built up within her. Everything that echoed in her mind . . . echoed in her head for a long time . . .
For a time longer than she could really remember . . .
It hurt her, the thoughts barraged her senses . . . clouded her thoughts, her emotions swelled within her . . .
Everything came back to haunt her . . .
The lies . . .
The lies . . .
He had said he had liked her . . .
Loved her . . .
She wanted him to love her . . .
She wanted him to care about her . . .
But he wasn't following her path torn through the forest. Inu-Yasha wasn't pursuing Kagome because he didn't care. He was probably back in the warm hut, dry and comfortable thinking about Kikyou.
Kikyou!
That bitch Kikyou!
But Kagome didn't care anymore! How could she? Why should she? Inu-Yasha was so rude, belligerent and cruel . . .
She didn't care anymore!
No more!
He probably cursed her behind her back if he knew her true feelings. Had she let them out? He probably would curse her. Tease her. Insult her emotions as if they were nothing and then ignore her even though she was of use to him.
Of use.
Kagome didn't want to be of use to anybody! She wanted to be loved! Every red blooded girl wanted to be loved! But, Inu-Yasha was a demon, not a human. Though he had human blood in him he was still demon. Perhaps that had something to do with it – that's why he loves a dead woman!
"I think about you all the time!" he had said to her. Kagome heard him say that to her!! And then he acted as if it meant nothing! As if he had never said it! As if it shouldn't hurt her feelings!
But it did hurt her feelings.
He lied to me! Kagome cried out within her soul. He lied to me this whole time! I'm nothing to him! Nothing!
Through her tears and the rain pummeling the forest she realized that she was lost.
But she didn't care.
Let a demon take her! Let a demon kill her! Put her out of her emotional misery! Take her life and bring her into the peace of death . . .
The death that Kikyou had . . .
The death that Kikyou had been brought back from . . .
Forced back from . . .
Kagome fell into the mud in a ball with her knees against her chest and the rain keeping the thick much from clinging to her face as she cried harder. She longed for death . . . wished for it . . . desired it . . .
If she could just die here, no one would notice . . .
Inu-Yasha would, she thought to herself bitterly. He would notice because she wouldn't be able to sense the jewel shards anymore. He wouldn't be able to turn himself into a full demon . . .
HA! Too bad for him, Kagome thought harshly. That was all he wanted. All he cared about . . . so he can be with that dead woman . . .
The breath in her lungs came out in gasping whimpers as she struggled to remain conscious, her heart fluttered and palpitated as she tried to calm down. But she couldn't. She tried, but she couldn't bring her mind at ease . . .
Her body cried for sleep, but she couldn't cease the thoughts that rushed through her.
Consumed her . . .
Why wasn't Inu-Yasha following her? He didn't care! HE DIDN'T CARE!!
She trembled even harder, thinking about what the hanyou was doing at that moment. He could smell her, Kagome knew. Why didn't he come after her. Perhaps he thought she'd come back that night and everything would be okay. He would ignore it just as he ignored everything. Everything. Any emotion that came out of her he only bypassed as if it were nothing to him. Nothing.
Absolutely nothing.
Then that meant that he thought she was absolutely nothing. Nothing at all but a jewel detector. A friend that he had to keep alive in order to get what he wanted.
That's all.
Only what he wanted.
Selfish.
Selfish brute.
But she didn't care.
She was alone in the woods now. She didn't care if that heathen beast missed her.
She didn't care if that monster loved her.
She did, but she couldn't.
She did, but how could she?
She did, but it was a waste of time . . .
"I think about you all the time, Kikyou." He had said to that woman, in front of her even.
Kagome was tired of being brushed aside for her. How he didn't care about her . . . she wanted him to . . .
Oh how she prayed he would care for her. Loved her as he had loved Kikyou. She was dead . . . sort of . . . he should have gotten over it. Kikyou wanted him dead – Kagome wanted him alive . . .
But she couldn't make him see that.
It was beyond her power to make him see it.
Just a jewel detector . . .
Just a shard seeker with the Sight . . .
Just a reincarnated Miko.
That and only that . . .
And that didn't mean anything to Inu-Yasha.
Kagome cringed and caught her breath. The rain began to grow cold around her as she struggled to calm down. The mud oozed about her body as she moved, her legs ached, her chest screamed for more air as she inhaled deeply and sighed . . .
She had seen Kikyou just before she had ran. Sad and lonely she had stood over Kagome . . . but she had not been sad and lonely then . . . she seemed as if she were up to something.
Something . . .
He lied to me! He lied to me!
Those words ran through her head. All she wanted to do was scream. To cry. To howl into the night . . .
Inu-Yasha didn't care about her . . .
Why should she care.
Why should she even stay . . .
With a gasping effort, the young girl pushed herself to her feet and stumbled forward, her feet sinking into the muck of the earth. Her raven hair was plastered against her back and shoulders, but she didn't care.
Her face was swollen and red with tears.
But she didn't care . . .
The forest seemed so pleasant . . . so welcoming . . .
She turned back to the direction in which she had come, Kagome knew the village was back there. She knew that Inu-Yasha was back there.
But he didn't care.
He didn't care about her . . .
Miroku didn't care about her . . .
Sango didn't care . . .
But, Inu-Yasha . . .
She had spent so long caring for him . . .
All for what? All for nothing . . .
Inu-Yasha a voice of reason whispered in her thoughts . . .
He lied to me! He lied to me!
Kagome turned her back and walked further into the darkness of the stormy forest, away from the friendly village . . .
Away from her struggling heart . . .
Away from Inu-Yasha . . .
Kikyou smiled.
*** Oh, can you sense by bitterness?? grin I hope you like!!! Gee, do you think he would actually come after her? Poor Kagome. Please read and review!! Reviews goooood!!! ***
