"Connor's Sunnydale Vacation" - Chapter 5
Dawn's birthday.
Thanks a million to all who've read and reviewed the story thus far. Connor/Dawn (Donner?) is not a popular ship and it's hard to get attention for my little story but I appreciate every scrap.
Thanks to Lori who inspired me with the idea for Connor's present by pointing out how Spike's callous treatment of the 'girl in the alley' on Angel was really a mark of concern, empowering the girl to look out for herself instead of counting on a hero. (I was going to have Connor give Dawn a key to remind her of who she was and that would've been lame beyond words! Especially since she isn't a key anymore.)
You will notice I lifted one scene that occurred in season 4 Angel (you'll know it when you hear it) and pretended like it has already happened.
Also, yes I know that the end of the last chapter was corny and contrived since Buffy would, of course, insist on riding in back with her injured sis, but come on, I couldn't resist!
****************
"My boots!! Oh my god, Buffy, my boots!" Dawn shrieked, ringing eardrums several blocks away. "Thank you SO much."
"Hey with a fashionista like Janice coming to the party you have to look your best, right?" Buffy smiled at her ecstatic sister. "Besides, I'll probably need to borrow them sometimes...."
"Oh no," Dawn denied, hugging the footwear to her chest. "I am not having my precioussss returned with demon goop all over them."
She dropped down on the couch and kicked off her shoes revealing rainbow- striped toe-socks. Then she began the time-consuming task of unlacing the knee-high boots with the total concentration she usually applied to an algebra problem.
Buffy smiled again. "Enjoy," she said, "I've got to go bake your cake since I have to work a shift and won't have time later. Betty Crocker double chocolate fudge." She headed toward the kitchen.
Connor leaned on the doorframe, arms folded, watching the incomprehensible display of fashion frenzy. He ventured into the room, sitting soundlessly down on the edge of the armchair, and casually tossed an ill-wrapped package on the coffee table in front of Dawn. At first she was too engrossed in her bootlace loosening to notice, but finally she glanced up and the strange parcel caught her attention. She looked from it to Connor questioningly.
He shrugged and looked away.
She picked up the object, which was wrapped in what appeared to be some kind of animal skin and bound with twine. After examining it, she set it on her lap and began to pick at the knots.
Connor's eyes slid back over to watch her.
"Be careful," he cautioned, as she finally gave up on the knot and slipped the tight binding off one edge of the object. Heedlessly, she peeled the leathery skin away and her present fell out into her lap.
"Oh!" she said, taken aback. It was a two edged blade no longer than her hand, the handle was dark, greasy leather, worn shiny with age.
"For protection," Connor explained. "It's easy to hide anywhere on you." He paused, sensing her underwhelmed response then added. "Maybe in one of your new boots?"
Dawn looked up and saw the doubt in his eyes, the trace of a frown beginning to form.
"It's beautiful!" she enthused, turning on her brightest wattage smile. His face cleared and he gave her that ghost-of-a-smile back.
"I can show you how to use it," he said. "The important thing is to keep the blade sharp. It doesn't matter how strong you are as long you know where and how to strike and you keep your blade sharp." He eyed her spindly biceps. "That's why it's a good weapon for you."
"You saying I'm a weakling?" Dawn demanded in mock indignation.
He hesitated, looking uncertain again.
"Just kidding. Hello. Joke!"
"Oh."
"Really. Thank you," Dawn said warmly. "It's a very thoughtful gift."
Connor stood up, arms crossed again, and shifted slightly from one foot to the other.
Dawn stroked the material the knife had been wrapped in. "Did you.. Is this from Quor-toth?" she asked.
He nodded. "It's a piece of skin from the first demon I ever killed. And the knife . my father.." He stopped. "I mean, the man who raised me, ground the blade down from a bigger knife then helped me fashion a grip for it. He made it small because my hands were little." Connor paused again. "I've worn it ever since."
Dawn pictured the lonely little boy and his few treasures and felt her eyes well with tears at the halting explanation. "Well, then." her voice choked and she cleared her throat before continuing. "It's a work of art, isn't it? I will treasure it, Connor." She quickly blinked her eyes free of tears and gazed at him calmly.
"Just use it," he said brusquely. "Keep yourself safe." He turned and left the room.
Dawn thoughtfully turned the knife over and over in her hand and then wrapped it carefully back in the scrap of leather.
*********
"How do I look? Do I look okay?" Dawn asked for the fifth time, turning for Buffy's inspection before resuming her job of opening dip and chip bags.
Buffy surveyed her sister from head to toe, wondering when short skirts had become so incredibly...short. And kind of slutty looking. She was sure she'd never worn outfits like that. Dawn's new-old boots from the retro shop only served to emphasize the long expanse of leg leading up to the hem of said skirt. At least her top covered all cleavage, but in a kind of tight way.
Buffy only gritted her teeth and smiled. "You look perfect, just like you did the last four times you asked me." Before Dawn could ask she added, "Hair and makeup too."
"I'm nervous. I don't know why I'm so nervous!"
"Maybe because you asked friends from different parts of your life to meet and you don't know if they're going to get along," Buffy replied wisely.
"Ya think?" Dawn asked. "What the heck was I doing? Janice in the same room as Amber and Sue? Fireworks. And Ryan?! I asked Janice to come to a party where the guy I've been interested in all summer is going to be! That's like asking a cat if it'd like to play with your new pet gerbil."
"You think she'd eat him?" Buffy teased. "I always wondered if Janice wasn't really a demon in disguise."
"Very amusing. Thanks for the visual."
Buffy, abruptly recognizing the double entendre, changed the subject. "And what about Connor? How's he going to fit in with your unusual suspects?"
"He'd probably be more comfortable going on patrol with you," Dawn suggested hopefully. "Not that I hate him or anything. Actually this past week turned out better than I thought it would. Still I really can't picture him in a room with these guys."
"You want an easy out, but that's not going to happen. The whole point in having Connor visit was to introduce him to average teen life and what's more average than throwing an awkward party where nobody's quite comfortable? Besides, I'm not patrolling tonight. I'm chaperoning."
"Chaperoning!" Dawn wailed. "Give me a break."
But her sister only blinded her with an insincere Buffybot smile and continued frosting the cake. Although she'd never admit it, actually Dawn was kind of grateful Buffy would be around to help bail her out if the tension got too thick. Sometimes it was kind of nice having an older sister who wasn't completely uncool.
"Well," Dawn sighed, tearing the plastic from a packet of napkins. "Maybe Marie can talk with Connor. She's new. He's new. And as long as he keeps his mouth shut and nods a lot it could be okay, right? Oh crap! I went and told Janice he was like, mentally impaired, so do I stick with that now or what?"
"You did what?"
"Well, we ran into her at the Espresso Pump that first day and it just kinda came out," Dawn explained. "Also, he's our cousin from Wyoming so if you could go with that...."
"Wyoming? Why didn't you just say L.A.? If you're going to lie its always best to stick as close to the truth as possible."
"I thought L.A. sounded too interesting and she'd start to ask him stuff about it and he'd say something weird about how different it was to hunt demons in the city compared to their natural habitat or something...." Dawn trailed off then added, "Nobody would be interested in hearing about life in Wyoming. It seemed ... safe."
"Our mentally impaired cousin from Wyoming. Good one, Dawn," Buffy said dryly. "How many candles am I putting on this cake again? Ten?"
The doorbell rang and Dawn went to greet her first guest.
**********
Connor stood quietly in the corner wondering how long he must stay here and if Dawn would even notice if he slipped upstairs to spend the rest of the evening in his room. At least no one was talking at him anymore. The girl named Marie had finally given up and was now exchanging stories about co- workers with the red headed boy, Bryan.
Dawn's other work friend, Ryan, the one she had been so excited about, was sitting with the loud girl, Janice and making her laugh a lot. Dawn was engaged in conversation with the rest of the girls at the party but Connor saw her sneaking disgusted looks at Janice and Ryan. Connor didn't like Ryan, who was noisy and pushy and stupid. And he especially didn't like the way Ryan had looked at Dawn's legs like a hungry Grathnik when he first arrived - before Janice had shown up and stolen his attention.
Alex, the one who had showed him how to use a skateboard the other day, had tossed Connor a quick, "What's up, man?" when he arrived. Now he was deep in discussion with his friend Tim about soccer and how starting a new Sunnydale High team was going to effect them. Connor listened for a while and tried to understand but the terms they used weren't anything like baseball, the only sport he remotely understood thanks to Angel.
He noticed Alex glancing at Dawn's friend Sue and her glancing back but never at the same moment. Connor wondered why they didn't talk to each other instead of their friends if they were so interested.
The background music was loud; the conversations were carried on at top volume; and Connor's head was beginning to ache. He started to shift toward the door, intent on escape.
"So, Conan," Ryan suddenly called out. "Janice tells me you're from Montana or something. What's that like? You have horses out there?"
Connor froze.
"He's from Wyoming and his dad owns a hardware store," Dawn interrupted too loudly. The other conversations suddenly halted and all eyes were on Connor.
"You help out in your dad's store?" Janice asked in that high voice reserved for little children and lap dogs.
"Yes?" Connor looked to Dawn for confirmation.
"That's sweet," Janice cooed. "I bet you do a great job."
"Janice said you go to a special school?" Ryan said. "You ever been like, in Special Olympics or something?"
"He sure picked up 'boarding fast," Alex marveled, now that the fact that Connor was 'special' had been revealed. "Kid was amazing."
"Really? So what's your sport? What do you like to do, man?" Ryan persisted amiably but with an undercurrent of something less friendly.
Connor looked around at all the staring eyes and blurted out the first thing that came to him. "I hunt."
"With guns?" Janice asked, wide-eyed. "They let you have a gun?"
"I like a bow and arrow better," Connor answered truthfully. "Or a sword." From the corner of his eye he saw Dawn grimace and knew he'd made a mistake. The girls she was sitting with were now bestowing pitying looks on him and he wanted to slap the pity right off their faces.
"Sword, huh?" Ryan grinned. "And what do you hunt? Antelope? Bear? Maybe some dragons?"
"Ryan, shut up," Bryan interjected. "You're such an asshole sometimes. Leave the kid alone."
For some reason this pissed Connor off more than Ryan's baiting. He knew Ryan was attempting to make a fool of him somehow, but he hated the condescending, protective note in Bryan's voice even worse.
"All right then. Anybody want something else to drink?" Dawn popped up from her seat and spoke brightly.
At the same moment, Connor scowled at Bryan and took a menacing step toward Ryan, his eyes burning like two concentrated blue gas jets.
"I kill anything that needs killing," he said coolly.
"Why don't you help me with the refreshments, Connor." Dawn glared at him. "In the kitchen."
"Well that's ... ominous," Ryan stood, still half smiling but a bit taken aback by the unexpected shift in tone caused by his teasing.
Connor took another step forward and Dawn grabbed his arm. "I meant now," she continued, hauling him out of the room with her.
"Cool it!" she said when she had dragged him into the kitchen. "I know Ryan's being an idiot, I didn't realize what a jerk he really is, but just try to ignore him."
"Why did you tell those people there was something wrong with me?" Connor fixed her with those startling eyes and Dawn squirmed inside.
"I don't know. It was stupid. I shouldn't have told Janice that but I didn't know you at first and I didn't know how to explain your...."
"Weirdness?" Connor supplied. He stared at her some more and she struggled to find something to say that wouldn't sound like an excuse.
"I'm sorry," she finally mumbled.
He shrugged indifferently. "It doesn't matter. I'm sorry you got stuck with me all week." He looked over her shoulder toward the living room. "You'd better get back to your party."
Dawn followed his glance toward the living room and when she looked back, he had left the house through the back door.
*********
A few moments later, after calling Buffy from the laundry room and asking her to please serve drinks to the guests, Dawn followed Connor from the house. She saw his pissed off stance as he leaned against the tree in the backyard and approached tentatively.
"Hey," she said, moving up beside him. "I said I was sorry and I really am. It was absolutely stupid of me to spin that dumb story and I don't want you to think.... I mean, I didn't mind spending time with you this week. I had fun." She paused but he remained motionless and silent. "Didn't you? Have fun, I mean?"
He shrugged. "I don't know."
Dawn counted to ten and waited, sensing that there was more he needed to say.
Finally he continued, "I just.... I'll never understand this place, how things work, what people expect, how I should act. I don't belong here." In an even quieter voice he mumbled. " I just want to go home. At least I knew what to do there."
Dawn knew he wasn't talking about Los Angeles.
"It must be hard," she agreed. "I mean, you only knew one person your whole life and now you're surrounded by strangers. I get that."
She paused, choosing her next words carefully. "But Connor, it doesn't have to be so bad here. Just give it some time and give people a chance. You know, almost everyone feels like an outsider. You're not the only person trying to figure himself out."
He remained silent, picking bark off the tree.
Dawn sighed impatiently and shelved the pep talk. "Besides, you're stuck here now so get over it. If you don't lighten up and learn to laugh a little you're never going to have any friends."
"I don't know how to talk to people," Connor admitted, stealing a glance at Dawn. "I can't.. I don't know how.to laugh."
There was a pause while windows opened in Dawn's mind and she began to understand that Connor wasn't being metaphoric, he was literally learning to speak and laugh and act like a regular human being as if it were a foreign language and he didn't have a translation dictionary.
"I will never belong here." Connor repeated stubbornly, picking viciously at the bark. "I should have stayed in Quor-toth."
Dawn couldn't help it. She laughed. "That's hilarious. You think my friends are worse than demons in a hell dimension."
"At least I could kill the demons when they bothered me." Connor didn't crack a smile but Dawn could hear it in his voice.
"There. You see," she said triumphantly. "You do have a sense of humor. We just have to dig it out and polish it up." She touched his arm. "Please come back inside. Give it another try. I'll tell everybody you're not really slow just a little ... off beat. And I'll make that ass, Ryan, shut up."
Connor shook his head.
Dawn punched his arm lightly. "Come on. I'll make it better, I promise."
"No."
"All right." Dawn nodded. She linked her hand with his. "But don't sulk, okay? And don't go off mad. I'll send everyone away as soon as I can."
She gave his hand a little squeeze and he winced slightly. Dawn brought the hand closer to her eyes. It was hard to see in the dark but his knuckles appeared to be bleeding.
"What'd you do?" she demanded. "Punch the tree?"
"Yes." An embarrassed smile crept across his face as Dawn laughed.
"Man, you ARE tightly wound," she said. "Take a Xanax."
Her laughter was infectious and Connor's smile broadened.
Dawn gave him an assessing look then reached out her other hand and touched the side of his face. "There. You see? You can laugh at yourself and you look a lot better smiling than scowling. Some girls go in for that sexy brooding stuff, but me, I love a smile."
His eyes locked with hers and suddenly both of their smiles faded. The silence grew. They could hear faint sounds from the party inside the house; music and voices. A dog barked somewhere down the street and a car engine purred another street over.
Dawn lips parted. She licked them nervously. She couldn't see Connor's expression very well, just the glint of his eyes in the moonlight. Self- consciously she took her hand away from his face.
Another few seconds passed and she realized that nothing was going to happen unless she made it. She leaned in toward him, tilting her face up, but he was still frozen. Dawn became impatient.
"Do you.do you want to kiss me?" she asked lamely and kind of breathlessly because her heart was pounding in her throat and choking her.
"Yes," he whispered. "But.."
"What?"
"I don't have any money," he replied uncertainly.
"Excuse me?!" She practically leaped away from him, affronted as a cat doused with cold water.
"I don't have money for you," he repeated slowly.
"What the HELL are you talking about." She crossed her arms over her chest and glared.
Connor looked as confused as she felt but he tried to explain. "I did kiss a girl once but she died right after, and then another time when I saved a girl from a vampire she said she would only kiss me if I had fifty dollars. I wasn't sure if it was a custom...."
He trailed off as Dawn stared at him openmouthed.
"So I don't . have fifty dollars," he added.
Comprehension burst and Dawn fought to hold back a smile. "Your father, I mean Holtz, really didn't talk to you about anything but killing demons did he?"
Connor frowned.
"But I would've thought Angel would explain things."
"He talks to me about baseball," Connor said helpfully.
"He thinks you're about seven instead of seventeen," Dawn surmised. She drew a deep breath.
"Listen, Connor, you don't always have to pay a girl to, you know, make out with you. That girl you met was, um, special. She does it for a living."
He looked blank then suddenly his eyes cleared and Dawn could almost envision a light bulb over his head. "So Gunn ... doesn't give Fred fifty dollars?"
"Huh?" Dawn didn't know who he was talking about but it seemed to make sense to Connor so she continued, "That's right. And you don't have to give me anything for a kiss."
"Okay."
He stepped toward her and inclined his head slightly. Dawn slipped her hands up onto his shoulders and leaned in with her face upraised. Their lips touched chastely then separated. Connor lifted his head, eyes opening and looking curiously down at her.
Dawn smiled. She wrapped her hand around the back of his neck, his soft hair tickling her skin, and pulled him into a deeper kiss. She hadn't had a whole lot of experience herself, but Connor was so clueless she felt empowered to take the lead. With parted lips she gently, repeatedly, moved her mouth against his as he began to respond. She found that a girly, full- lipped mouth on a guy was a very good thing after all. She ventured her tongue out a little and found his already waiting to meet it.
A soft 'mmm' escaped her and she pressed herself more firmly against him.
Like tinder to a pile of deadwood, fire suddenly flared. Things escalated quickly with Connor's strong arms pulling her even closer; his hands roaming up and down her back and finally coming to rest, cupping her bottom. He kissed her feverishly now, moving from lips to face to neck and back again.
As he lightly licked the hollow of her throat, Dawn felt a roaring in her ears and her head seemed to be spinning out somewhere far away, watching from a distance. All she was aware of, all she could feel was her pulse pounding, not in her chest where it belonged, but down in her crotch which was rubbing against Connor's matching body part. A little voice of reason told her this was not a good thing.
"Whoa!" She pulled away, simultaneously pushing Connor back. "Wait. Slow down."
He stood gasping and gazing glassily at her. "Please." His voice sounded strangled. "I need.."
"I know what you need. But you can't have," she answered. "This is way more than I.. We have to slow down," she repeated and held up an admonishing finger. "Kissing only. Maybe some hand holding. That's it."
He nodded silently and stepped back toward her hopefully.
She reached a hand up, carefully brushing the hair out of his eyes, and cupped the side of his face. He turned his head and nuzzled his lips against her palm, eyes drifting slightly closed in contentment. His hand gently touched the back of hers then those otherworldly pale blue eyes opened wide again and pinned her like a butterfly. He mirrored her movements with his other hand, brushing back her hair and gently stroking her face.
"Like this?" he asked so quietly she wasn't sure if she'd heard or imagined the words.
"Yes," she murmured, mesmerized by his eyes.
"Hey Dawn? Are you coming?" Janice's bellow from the back door broke the tension and Dawn practically leaped out of her cool new boots.
"Crap! I have to go back to my party," she said, frowning. She looked up at Connor then pressed a quick kiss to his lips. "I'll see you after?"
He nodded and she turned and walked briskly to the house where he could hear her talking to her friend.
"Uh, Dawn, were you just...? Please, tell me that guy isn't really your cousin!"
"Not a cousin. Not retarded. And Janice, you're welcome to Ryan. I guess I'm not interested after all."
To be continued....
Dawn's birthday.
Thanks a million to all who've read and reviewed the story thus far. Connor/Dawn (Donner?) is not a popular ship and it's hard to get attention for my little story but I appreciate every scrap.
Thanks to Lori who inspired me with the idea for Connor's present by pointing out how Spike's callous treatment of the 'girl in the alley' on Angel was really a mark of concern, empowering the girl to look out for herself instead of counting on a hero. (I was going to have Connor give Dawn a key to remind her of who she was and that would've been lame beyond words! Especially since she isn't a key anymore.)
You will notice I lifted one scene that occurred in season 4 Angel (you'll know it when you hear it) and pretended like it has already happened.
Also, yes I know that the end of the last chapter was corny and contrived since Buffy would, of course, insist on riding in back with her injured sis, but come on, I couldn't resist!
****************
"My boots!! Oh my god, Buffy, my boots!" Dawn shrieked, ringing eardrums several blocks away. "Thank you SO much."
"Hey with a fashionista like Janice coming to the party you have to look your best, right?" Buffy smiled at her ecstatic sister. "Besides, I'll probably need to borrow them sometimes...."
"Oh no," Dawn denied, hugging the footwear to her chest. "I am not having my precioussss returned with demon goop all over them."
She dropped down on the couch and kicked off her shoes revealing rainbow- striped toe-socks. Then she began the time-consuming task of unlacing the knee-high boots with the total concentration she usually applied to an algebra problem.
Buffy smiled again. "Enjoy," she said, "I've got to go bake your cake since I have to work a shift and won't have time later. Betty Crocker double chocolate fudge." She headed toward the kitchen.
Connor leaned on the doorframe, arms folded, watching the incomprehensible display of fashion frenzy. He ventured into the room, sitting soundlessly down on the edge of the armchair, and casually tossed an ill-wrapped package on the coffee table in front of Dawn. At first she was too engrossed in her bootlace loosening to notice, but finally she glanced up and the strange parcel caught her attention. She looked from it to Connor questioningly.
He shrugged and looked away.
She picked up the object, which was wrapped in what appeared to be some kind of animal skin and bound with twine. After examining it, she set it on her lap and began to pick at the knots.
Connor's eyes slid back over to watch her.
"Be careful," he cautioned, as she finally gave up on the knot and slipped the tight binding off one edge of the object. Heedlessly, she peeled the leathery skin away and her present fell out into her lap.
"Oh!" she said, taken aback. It was a two edged blade no longer than her hand, the handle was dark, greasy leather, worn shiny with age.
"For protection," Connor explained. "It's easy to hide anywhere on you." He paused, sensing her underwhelmed response then added. "Maybe in one of your new boots?"
Dawn looked up and saw the doubt in his eyes, the trace of a frown beginning to form.
"It's beautiful!" she enthused, turning on her brightest wattage smile. His face cleared and he gave her that ghost-of-a-smile back.
"I can show you how to use it," he said. "The important thing is to keep the blade sharp. It doesn't matter how strong you are as long you know where and how to strike and you keep your blade sharp." He eyed her spindly biceps. "That's why it's a good weapon for you."
"You saying I'm a weakling?" Dawn demanded in mock indignation.
He hesitated, looking uncertain again.
"Just kidding. Hello. Joke!"
"Oh."
"Really. Thank you," Dawn said warmly. "It's a very thoughtful gift."
Connor stood up, arms crossed again, and shifted slightly from one foot to the other.
Dawn stroked the material the knife had been wrapped in. "Did you.. Is this from Quor-toth?" she asked.
He nodded. "It's a piece of skin from the first demon I ever killed. And the knife . my father.." He stopped. "I mean, the man who raised me, ground the blade down from a bigger knife then helped me fashion a grip for it. He made it small because my hands were little." Connor paused again. "I've worn it ever since."
Dawn pictured the lonely little boy and his few treasures and felt her eyes well with tears at the halting explanation. "Well, then." her voice choked and she cleared her throat before continuing. "It's a work of art, isn't it? I will treasure it, Connor." She quickly blinked her eyes free of tears and gazed at him calmly.
"Just use it," he said brusquely. "Keep yourself safe." He turned and left the room.
Dawn thoughtfully turned the knife over and over in her hand and then wrapped it carefully back in the scrap of leather.
*********
"How do I look? Do I look okay?" Dawn asked for the fifth time, turning for Buffy's inspection before resuming her job of opening dip and chip bags.
Buffy surveyed her sister from head to toe, wondering when short skirts had become so incredibly...short. And kind of slutty looking. She was sure she'd never worn outfits like that. Dawn's new-old boots from the retro shop only served to emphasize the long expanse of leg leading up to the hem of said skirt. At least her top covered all cleavage, but in a kind of tight way.
Buffy only gritted her teeth and smiled. "You look perfect, just like you did the last four times you asked me." Before Dawn could ask she added, "Hair and makeup too."
"I'm nervous. I don't know why I'm so nervous!"
"Maybe because you asked friends from different parts of your life to meet and you don't know if they're going to get along," Buffy replied wisely.
"Ya think?" Dawn asked. "What the heck was I doing? Janice in the same room as Amber and Sue? Fireworks. And Ryan?! I asked Janice to come to a party where the guy I've been interested in all summer is going to be! That's like asking a cat if it'd like to play with your new pet gerbil."
"You think she'd eat him?" Buffy teased. "I always wondered if Janice wasn't really a demon in disguise."
"Very amusing. Thanks for the visual."
Buffy, abruptly recognizing the double entendre, changed the subject. "And what about Connor? How's he going to fit in with your unusual suspects?"
"He'd probably be more comfortable going on patrol with you," Dawn suggested hopefully. "Not that I hate him or anything. Actually this past week turned out better than I thought it would. Still I really can't picture him in a room with these guys."
"You want an easy out, but that's not going to happen. The whole point in having Connor visit was to introduce him to average teen life and what's more average than throwing an awkward party where nobody's quite comfortable? Besides, I'm not patrolling tonight. I'm chaperoning."
"Chaperoning!" Dawn wailed. "Give me a break."
But her sister only blinded her with an insincere Buffybot smile and continued frosting the cake. Although she'd never admit it, actually Dawn was kind of grateful Buffy would be around to help bail her out if the tension got too thick. Sometimes it was kind of nice having an older sister who wasn't completely uncool.
"Well," Dawn sighed, tearing the plastic from a packet of napkins. "Maybe Marie can talk with Connor. She's new. He's new. And as long as he keeps his mouth shut and nods a lot it could be okay, right? Oh crap! I went and told Janice he was like, mentally impaired, so do I stick with that now or what?"
"You did what?"
"Well, we ran into her at the Espresso Pump that first day and it just kinda came out," Dawn explained. "Also, he's our cousin from Wyoming so if you could go with that...."
"Wyoming? Why didn't you just say L.A.? If you're going to lie its always best to stick as close to the truth as possible."
"I thought L.A. sounded too interesting and she'd start to ask him stuff about it and he'd say something weird about how different it was to hunt demons in the city compared to their natural habitat or something...." Dawn trailed off then added, "Nobody would be interested in hearing about life in Wyoming. It seemed ... safe."
"Our mentally impaired cousin from Wyoming. Good one, Dawn," Buffy said dryly. "How many candles am I putting on this cake again? Ten?"
The doorbell rang and Dawn went to greet her first guest.
**********
Connor stood quietly in the corner wondering how long he must stay here and if Dawn would even notice if he slipped upstairs to spend the rest of the evening in his room. At least no one was talking at him anymore. The girl named Marie had finally given up and was now exchanging stories about co- workers with the red headed boy, Bryan.
Dawn's other work friend, Ryan, the one she had been so excited about, was sitting with the loud girl, Janice and making her laugh a lot. Dawn was engaged in conversation with the rest of the girls at the party but Connor saw her sneaking disgusted looks at Janice and Ryan. Connor didn't like Ryan, who was noisy and pushy and stupid. And he especially didn't like the way Ryan had looked at Dawn's legs like a hungry Grathnik when he first arrived - before Janice had shown up and stolen his attention.
Alex, the one who had showed him how to use a skateboard the other day, had tossed Connor a quick, "What's up, man?" when he arrived. Now he was deep in discussion with his friend Tim about soccer and how starting a new Sunnydale High team was going to effect them. Connor listened for a while and tried to understand but the terms they used weren't anything like baseball, the only sport he remotely understood thanks to Angel.
He noticed Alex glancing at Dawn's friend Sue and her glancing back but never at the same moment. Connor wondered why they didn't talk to each other instead of their friends if they were so interested.
The background music was loud; the conversations were carried on at top volume; and Connor's head was beginning to ache. He started to shift toward the door, intent on escape.
"So, Conan," Ryan suddenly called out. "Janice tells me you're from Montana or something. What's that like? You have horses out there?"
Connor froze.
"He's from Wyoming and his dad owns a hardware store," Dawn interrupted too loudly. The other conversations suddenly halted and all eyes were on Connor.
"You help out in your dad's store?" Janice asked in that high voice reserved for little children and lap dogs.
"Yes?" Connor looked to Dawn for confirmation.
"That's sweet," Janice cooed. "I bet you do a great job."
"Janice said you go to a special school?" Ryan said. "You ever been like, in Special Olympics or something?"
"He sure picked up 'boarding fast," Alex marveled, now that the fact that Connor was 'special' had been revealed. "Kid was amazing."
"Really? So what's your sport? What do you like to do, man?" Ryan persisted amiably but with an undercurrent of something less friendly.
Connor looked around at all the staring eyes and blurted out the first thing that came to him. "I hunt."
"With guns?" Janice asked, wide-eyed. "They let you have a gun?"
"I like a bow and arrow better," Connor answered truthfully. "Or a sword." From the corner of his eye he saw Dawn grimace and knew he'd made a mistake. The girls she was sitting with were now bestowing pitying looks on him and he wanted to slap the pity right off their faces.
"Sword, huh?" Ryan grinned. "And what do you hunt? Antelope? Bear? Maybe some dragons?"
"Ryan, shut up," Bryan interjected. "You're such an asshole sometimes. Leave the kid alone."
For some reason this pissed Connor off more than Ryan's baiting. He knew Ryan was attempting to make a fool of him somehow, but he hated the condescending, protective note in Bryan's voice even worse.
"All right then. Anybody want something else to drink?" Dawn popped up from her seat and spoke brightly.
At the same moment, Connor scowled at Bryan and took a menacing step toward Ryan, his eyes burning like two concentrated blue gas jets.
"I kill anything that needs killing," he said coolly.
"Why don't you help me with the refreshments, Connor." Dawn glared at him. "In the kitchen."
"Well that's ... ominous," Ryan stood, still half smiling but a bit taken aback by the unexpected shift in tone caused by his teasing.
Connor took another step forward and Dawn grabbed his arm. "I meant now," she continued, hauling him out of the room with her.
"Cool it!" she said when she had dragged him into the kitchen. "I know Ryan's being an idiot, I didn't realize what a jerk he really is, but just try to ignore him."
"Why did you tell those people there was something wrong with me?" Connor fixed her with those startling eyes and Dawn squirmed inside.
"I don't know. It was stupid. I shouldn't have told Janice that but I didn't know you at first and I didn't know how to explain your...."
"Weirdness?" Connor supplied. He stared at her some more and she struggled to find something to say that wouldn't sound like an excuse.
"I'm sorry," she finally mumbled.
He shrugged indifferently. "It doesn't matter. I'm sorry you got stuck with me all week." He looked over her shoulder toward the living room. "You'd better get back to your party."
Dawn followed his glance toward the living room and when she looked back, he had left the house through the back door.
*********
A few moments later, after calling Buffy from the laundry room and asking her to please serve drinks to the guests, Dawn followed Connor from the house. She saw his pissed off stance as he leaned against the tree in the backyard and approached tentatively.
"Hey," she said, moving up beside him. "I said I was sorry and I really am. It was absolutely stupid of me to spin that dumb story and I don't want you to think.... I mean, I didn't mind spending time with you this week. I had fun." She paused but he remained motionless and silent. "Didn't you? Have fun, I mean?"
He shrugged. "I don't know."
Dawn counted to ten and waited, sensing that there was more he needed to say.
Finally he continued, "I just.... I'll never understand this place, how things work, what people expect, how I should act. I don't belong here." In an even quieter voice he mumbled. " I just want to go home. At least I knew what to do there."
Dawn knew he wasn't talking about Los Angeles.
"It must be hard," she agreed. "I mean, you only knew one person your whole life and now you're surrounded by strangers. I get that."
She paused, choosing her next words carefully. "But Connor, it doesn't have to be so bad here. Just give it some time and give people a chance. You know, almost everyone feels like an outsider. You're not the only person trying to figure himself out."
He remained silent, picking bark off the tree.
Dawn sighed impatiently and shelved the pep talk. "Besides, you're stuck here now so get over it. If you don't lighten up and learn to laugh a little you're never going to have any friends."
"I don't know how to talk to people," Connor admitted, stealing a glance at Dawn. "I can't.. I don't know how.to laugh."
There was a pause while windows opened in Dawn's mind and she began to understand that Connor wasn't being metaphoric, he was literally learning to speak and laugh and act like a regular human being as if it were a foreign language and he didn't have a translation dictionary.
"I will never belong here." Connor repeated stubbornly, picking viciously at the bark. "I should have stayed in Quor-toth."
Dawn couldn't help it. She laughed. "That's hilarious. You think my friends are worse than demons in a hell dimension."
"At least I could kill the demons when they bothered me." Connor didn't crack a smile but Dawn could hear it in his voice.
"There. You see," she said triumphantly. "You do have a sense of humor. We just have to dig it out and polish it up." She touched his arm. "Please come back inside. Give it another try. I'll tell everybody you're not really slow just a little ... off beat. And I'll make that ass, Ryan, shut up."
Connor shook his head.
Dawn punched his arm lightly. "Come on. I'll make it better, I promise."
"No."
"All right." Dawn nodded. She linked her hand with his. "But don't sulk, okay? And don't go off mad. I'll send everyone away as soon as I can."
She gave his hand a little squeeze and he winced slightly. Dawn brought the hand closer to her eyes. It was hard to see in the dark but his knuckles appeared to be bleeding.
"What'd you do?" she demanded. "Punch the tree?"
"Yes." An embarrassed smile crept across his face as Dawn laughed.
"Man, you ARE tightly wound," she said. "Take a Xanax."
Her laughter was infectious and Connor's smile broadened.
Dawn gave him an assessing look then reached out her other hand and touched the side of his face. "There. You see? You can laugh at yourself and you look a lot better smiling than scowling. Some girls go in for that sexy brooding stuff, but me, I love a smile."
His eyes locked with hers and suddenly both of their smiles faded. The silence grew. They could hear faint sounds from the party inside the house; music and voices. A dog barked somewhere down the street and a car engine purred another street over.
Dawn lips parted. She licked them nervously. She couldn't see Connor's expression very well, just the glint of his eyes in the moonlight. Self- consciously she took her hand away from his face.
Another few seconds passed and she realized that nothing was going to happen unless she made it. She leaned in toward him, tilting her face up, but he was still frozen. Dawn became impatient.
"Do you.do you want to kiss me?" she asked lamely and kind of breathlessly because her heart was pounding in her throat and choking her.
"Yes," he whispered. "But.."
"What?"
"I don't have any money," he replied uncertainly.
"Excuse me?!" She practically leaped away from him, affronted as a cat doused with cold water.
"I don't have money for you," he repeated slowly.
"What the HELL are you talking about." She crossed her arms over her chest and glared.
Connor looked as confused as she felt but he tried to explain. "I did kiss a girl once but she died right after, and then another time when I saved a girl from a vampire she said she would only kiss me if I had fifty dollars. I wasn't sure if it was a custom...."
He trailed off as Dawn stared at him openmouthed.
"So I don't . have fifty dollars," he added.
Comprehension burst and Dawn fought to hold back a smile. "Your father, I mean Holtz, really didn't talk to you about anything but killing demons did he?"
Connor frowned.
"But I would've thought Angel would explain things."
"He talks to me about baseball," Connor said helpfully.
"He thinks you're about seven instead of seventeen," Dawn surmised. She drew a deep breath.
"Listen, Connor, you don't always have to pay a girl to, you know, make out with you. That girl you met was, um, special. She does it for a living."
He looked blank then suddenly his eyes cleared and Dawn could almost envision a light bulb over his head. "So Gunn ... doesn't give Fred fifty dollars?"
"Huh?" Dawn didn't know who he was talking about but it seemed to make sense to Connor so she continued, "That's right. And you don't have to give me anything for a kiss."
"Okay."
He stepped toward her and inclined his head slightly. Dawn slipped her hands up onto his shoulders and leaned in with her face upraised. Their lips touched chastely then separated. Connor lifted his head, eyes opening and looking curiously down at her.
Dawn smiled. She wrapped her hand around the back of his neck, his soft hair tickling her skin, and pulled him into a deeper kiss. She hadn't had a whole lot of experience herself, but Connor was so clueless she felt empowered to take the lead. With parted lips she gently, repeatedly, moved her mouth against his as he began to respond. She found that a girly, full- lipped mouth on a guy was a very good thing after all. She ventured her tongue out a little and found his already waiting to meet it.
A soft 'mmm' escaped her and she pressed herself more firmly against him.
Like tinder to a pile of deadwood, fire suddenly flared. Things escalated quickly with Connor's strong arms pulling her even closer; his hands roaming up and down her back and finally coming to rest, cupping her bottom. He kissed her feverishly now, moving from lips to face to neck and back again.
As he lightly licked the hollow of her throat, Dawn felt a roaring in her ears and her head seemed to be spinning out somewhere far away, watching from a distance. All she was aware of, all she could feel was her pulse pounding, not in her chest where it belonged, but down in her crotch which was rubbing against Connor's matching body part. A little voice of reason told her this was not a good thing.
"Whoa!" She pulled away, simultaneously pushing Connor back. "Wait. Slow down."
He stood gasping and gazing glassily at her. "Please." His voice sounded strangled. "I need.."
"I know what you need. But you can't have," she answered. "This is way more than I.. We have to slow down," she repeated and held up an admonishing finger. "Kissing only. Maybe some hand holding. That's it."
He nodded silently and stepped back toward her hopefully.
She reached a hand up, carefully brushing the hair out of his eyes, and cupped the side of his face. He turned his head and nuzzled his lips against her palm, eyes drifting slightly closed in contentment. His hand gently touched the back of hers then those otherworldly pale blue eyes opened wide again and pinned her like a butterfly. He mirrored her movements with his other hand, brushing back her hair and gently stroking her face.
"Like this?" he asked so quietly she wasn't sure if she'd heard or imagined the words.
"Yes," she murmured, mesmerized by his eyes.
"Hey Dawn? Are you coming?" Janice's bellow from the back door broke the tension and Dawn practically leaped out of her cool new boots.
"Crap! I have to go back to my party," she said, frowning. She looked up at Connor then pressed a quick kiss to his lips. "I'll see you after?"
He nodded and she turned and walked briskly to the house where he could hear her talking to her friend.
"Uh, Dawn, were you just...? Please, tell me that guy isn't really your cousin!"
"Not a cousin. Not retarded. And Janice, you're welcome to Ryan. I guess I'm not interested after all."
To be continued....
