"Of Revenge, Deceit… and Snowcones"
-Vx Tao Ren xV, Itako no Anna
::Actions::
{Thoughts}
[Author's Notes]
**Scene Change**
Disclaimer: Shaman King obviously does not belong to us, it belongs to Takei Hiroyuki-Sama in all of his majesty.. So please, don't sue us… it's not worth it..
Author's (Ren and Anna's) Notes: Just to let you guys know, this is eventually going to turn into a "Truth or Dare"-type fiction. But we're not going to get there for another chapter or two, so please be patient. Another thing.. this fic takes place post-Shaman Fight by a year or two [Ren: so that Yoh-tachi are old enough to drive ^_^]. Anyways, please enjoy…
***
Chapter 01: "Car, What Car?"
Funbari. It's a nice, breezy… All right, who are we kidding? It's a blazing hot, humid summer day in Tokyo. It's been around a year since the Shaman Fight.. who knows, maybe a little bit more, who's counting anyway? [Anna: I'm not.]
??: SNOWCONES!!!!!!! GET YOUR SNOWCONES RIGHT HERE~!!!
It makes sense, right? To sell snowcones in the middle of the summer, you can make a lot of money that way.. except.. when the vendor is none other than.. Horohoro. Horohoro has been forced to sell snowcones to passing Funbari pedestrians due to the fact that he and Pilica managed to spend all of their money again, but the difference this time, is that their parents refuse to send them any more. So basically, Horohoro is doing this because he's flat broke. It's actually an extremely easy way to make money for a shaman like Horohoro to sell snowcones, since he has the power to control snow. Anyway—
??: GOD DAMNIT HOROHORO! WHERE DID YOU PUT MY CAR?!!?
Yes, you've heard right, Horohoro has turned to a life of crime!!! Nah, not really. You may not know it, but there's a perfectly good explanation for the relationship between Horohoro and a missing car… especially since that missing car belongs to none other than Tao Ren.
Horohoro: I don't know what you're talkin' about Ren… By the way, would you like to purchase a nice, frosty, snowcone… perfect for quenching your thirst in the blazing summer heat. For you, well.. your sister gave me $14.99… but for you… I'll bring it down to $9.99, only because you're my good, dear friend.. who I hold very close in the depths of my heart.
Ren: No.. I do NOT want a snowcone… I DO want my car!
Horohoro: Nah.. you don't want that car,.. you can't eat your car! What you CAN eat.. ::Horohoro begins to wave a snowcone in Ren's face:: is a nice… frosty… snowcone…
Ren: ::trying to act calmly:: Horohoro….. where'd you put my car..?
Horohoro: Aww, you don't need that car. Besides, don't you have 32 more at home? What you DO NEED.. ::Horohoro begins to wave the snowcone in Ren's face again:: is a nice… juicy… snowcone…
Ren: ::finally hits a nerve::: GOD DAMNIT HOROHORO! I DON'T WANT A FREAKIN' SNOWCONE!! NOW GET OUT OF MY FREAKIN' FACE, AND GIVE ME MY FUCKIN' CAR!
Horohoro: ::whining:: But Re~n!! Buy a snowcone from me! I need the money because I'm poor and my parents don't love me anymore!!!!
??: ::running towards Horohoro:: Oniicha~n!!! I hid that car like you wanted me too ^_^!
Horohoro: Pilica! ::starts to panic:: Wh-What are you talking about?! I didn't tell you to hide a CAR!..
That's right, he did it [Anna: But only because he knew Ren would either drive away, or run him over if he tried to sell him a snowcone.. ne, Ren?] [Ren:.. yeah..]. Horohoro stole Ren's car.. and Pilica hid it, so technically, Horohoro has no idea where it is, but he still pretty much stole it. [Ren:.. damn ice shaman…]
Ren: Horohoro! Where the hell is my FREAKIN' CAR?!!!
Horohoro: I dunno….
Ren: ::points at Pilica:: YOU! Where the hell did you put my car?!
Pilica: I don't know what you're talking about.. I didn't hide YOUR car… I hid A car…
**Meanwhile, at the Asakura household…**
??: YOHHHH!!!!!
Manta: Head for the hills!!!
Yes, a typical day at the Asakura household: Kyohyama Anna screaming [Anna: ^_^ It's all for the justice! ^_^], Oyamada Manta running for dear life, and Asakura Yoh… in the tea room… rolling yet another orange..
Anna: ::enters the tea room and looks at Yoh:: Yoh… what did I tell you to do?
Yoh: ::stops rolling the orange and looks at Anna a little.. well.. clueless:: Uhm… clean the onsen?
Anna: Yes, Yoh… that's right………… have you looked at the onsen lately?
Yoh: Uhm… no
Anna: … [Ren: Oh, great.. this wont end well..] WELL THERE'S A FUCKIN' CAR IN THE MIDDLE OF IT!!!! ::throws Yoh and Manta into the onsen:: [Ren: told 'ya] NOW GET IN THERE AND CLEAN IT! IF THERE'S GOING TO BE A CAR IN THE ONSEN, IT MIGHT AS WELL BE SPOTLESS!!
**Somewhere in Funbari..**
Ren: ::on a complete and total rampage:: GET BACK HERE!!!!!!!!!
**Only a few blocks away**
Jun and Pyron are walking down the street. Jun is licking a snowcone, having just bought one from Horohoro for $14.99.. when they can hear something rather familiar coming from a few blocks away…
??: GET BACK HERE AND FACE MY WRATH!!!! ::things start to explode::
Jun: ::a little distraught:: Ren… I thought I asked you not to torment that poor Horohoro boy anymore…
Horohoro and Pilica then dash by in front of Jun and Pyron.., followed by Ren, who was straight on the war-path of infinite destruction. Jun and Pyron then start to run after them, but aren't going too fast compared to them.
**Back at the Asakura household…**
Yoh and Manta are washing Ren's car, which is still in the middle of the onsen… While various screams can be heard from outside and soon, inside of the house.
??: GOD HAVE MERCY!!
??: NOT EVEN GOD'S GOING TO BE ABLE TO HELP YOU AFTER I'M THROUGH!!
??: I'm too young to go to hell..!
Yoh and Manta were pretty much able to figure out who their new visitors were, considering that this arrangement of threats and pleads is all too familiar by now..
Horohoro and Pilica: YOH!!! SAVE US!!!
Horohoro bursts through the front door, only to find a pretty irritated Anna standing right in front of him.
Anna: Help?.. That's what Yoh needs: HELP.. NOW GET OUT THERE, AND CLEAN THAT CAR!! ::throws Horohoro into the onsen::
Pilica: ONIICHA~N!! ::Pilica runs through the door, past Anna, into the onsen.. very closely being chased by Ren::
**In the Onsen…**
Horohoro has landed inside of Ren's car when Anna had thrown him inside. Yoh and Manta continue to wash the outside of the car, acting as if nothing has happened, and Pilica and Ren and running towards the entrance.
Pilica hides behind Yoh, while Ren runs in right after her and appears to have Bason-tou [Ren: Ren's glaive ^_^] with him now.
Ren: COME BACK AND FACE ME!!!!!
Ren stopped dead in his tracks as soon as he entered the onsen to witness the spectacle presented before him: Pilica pretty much shaking behind Yoh, who, with his unusually short friend, were washing what appeared to be his car… which was planted right in the middle of the onsen… There was also something—no, someONE in the backseat of his car… it was Horohoro.
Ren then walks over to his car and looks at the interior of it.
Ren: ::calmly:: Horohoro………. What are you doing in my car?
Horohoro: ::looks up and smiles::
There is a pause… a very long pause…
Ren: HOROHORO!! GET THE FUCK OU—
Ren then completely breaks down while he's about to finish his sentence, when—
Ren: WHO THE FUCK GOT WATER ALL OVER THE LEATHER?!
Yoh, Manta, and Pilica then dash for the door. However, Horohoro is unable to escape, since he's stuck in the backseat of Ren's car. [Anna: Dumbass.. He should have ran when he had the chance.] [Ren: Fool.]
You then see an overlook of Tokyo, where distant screams can be heard.
**
Chapter 01 Owari ^_^
Ren: The funeral service for Horohoro will be held on Arbor Day.
Anna: When's Arbor Day?
Ren: Who cares? Let his body rot and his soul be tormented in the ever-burning pits of hell. Muahahaha!!
Anna: Join us next time when Hao finally becomes imfamous upon all of the humans of earth!!
Ren: All shall feel the wrath of the o-mighty Hao-Sama!!!!!
Anna: ::backs away slowly::
