"Of Revenge, Deceit… and Snowcones"
-Vx Tao Ren xV, Itako no Anna
::Actions::
{Thoughts}
[Author's Notes]
**Scene Change**
Disclaimer: Shaman King obviously does not belong to us, it belongs to Takei Hiroyuki-Sama in all his majesty.. so please, don't sue us… it's not worth it..
Author's (Ren and Anna's) Notes: Hello and welcome to the fifth chapter of our deranged little fanfiction! We're extremely sorry for the very, very long delay. Today is like the void point of our birthdays (Ren's birthday was yesterday, and Anna's birthday is tomorrow.. talk about coincidence).. So, we both decided that we needed to update. So here 'ya go!.. [Ren: I can't believe I hit you in the face with a pie yesterday..! XD] [Anna: You got it my hair! I hate you all.. you and Horohoro, and Pilica, and Yoh, and Tamao too..].. [Ren: Well it was a surprise party.. it wouldn't have been right if I had hit Yoh in the face.. wait—didn't you get hit with jello on Yoh's birthday, too?.. ::starts to laugh::..] [Anna: SHUT UP!!] (let the mindless arguing commence) [Ren: Oh yeah, thanks to Ren-Tao for making me realize how long all of our devoted readers have been waiting.. Arigatou!] Oh by the way.. this chapter has warning for implied incest.. sorta…
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Chapter 05: "Elevators, and Chairs, and Minions.. Oh My!"
The Asakura household… what started out as a somewhat ordinary day… turned out to be anything but ordinary. Tao Ren's car had somehow mysteriously appeared in the middle of the onsen, and is still there as we speak; Horohoro and Pilica then found themselves inside the household, to seek salvage from Ren, who was ranting about the location of his car while chasing after the Ainu siblings all over the streets of Funbari; Jun and Pyron then found themselves at the house after Ren to make sure he didn't actually kill anyone; Hao then arrived after being arrested by local police for trying to disassemble an amusement park as a birthday present for one of his minions; Soon after, the X-LAWS showed up (which resulted with a hole in the onsen wall) to try to get Hao to repent for his sins…yet again; Bokutou No Ryu arrived to "greet" Lyserg's arrival (which resulted with the front door being broken off), soon to be "taken away".. or whatever the hell it was, by none other than Billy, the truck driver from America (which resulted with a hole in the tea room wall). This not-so-ordinary day then turned into an even more not-so-ordinary day when the group of shamans, and Manta, found themselves playing truth-or-dare in the tea room, whose first victim was Tao Jun, by Horohoro… which resulted in her flashing everyone in the vicinity, including the spirits (with Ren tied to a chair in the front row.. and Horohoro manually holding his eyes open).. Needless to say, this was definitely a not-so-ordinary day at the Asakura household.
Ren: I'm going next..
Everyone then turned to look at Tao Ren, whose face was hug down a bit and had his eyes shadowed. Everyone probably figured that Ren was pretty pissed, having to sit through the dare that involved his older sister flashing pretty much everyone he knew.. Yoh, Horohoro, Manta, Hao, and even the X-LAWS… all thanks to Horohoro. All thanks to that Ainu-baka who just had to be a pervert today.. Not to mention that the only reason Ren was even in Yoh's house was because of Horohoro.. It was because Horohoro had no money and decided to sell snowcones on the streets of Funbari, that Ren was even in this situation. Horohoro stole Ren's car to sell Ren a snowcone.. to an average person, this had no logic behind it.. but this is Horohoro that we're talking about.. for Horohoro, he figured that if he tried to sell Ren a snowcone, Ren would either drive away, without buying a snowcone, or try to run over Horohoro.. this was not in the least Horohoro's best interest.. being run over by Ren's car would imply him dying… which he did not want to do anytime soon, oh no indeed.. he kind of liked living, so he stole Ren's car and gave it to Pilica to hide.. which would further delay Horohoro's death.. it was a good idea, right? Hell, it was a great idea! Except when it's Horohoro who thinks so… Either way, Ren was out for blood, Ren was always out for blood, but today.. he was out for Horohoro's blood.. which isn't unusual… but that's not the point. The point being.. everyone knew this… except Horohoro.. everyone knew that making Ren's sister flash everyone would infuriate Ren.. but the fact that Horohoro tied him to a chair in the front, and just had to hold his eyes open to witness the site first-hand.. that just added to his immense fury. And that is definitely not a good thing… not a good thing indeed… hell, it should be illegal! [Ren: And when I rule the world.. it will be! ^_^] [Anna: What's up with you and your plans to rule the world lately?] [Ren: ::shrugs:: I dunno…]
Anyway, back to the story… it was now Tao Ren's turn to pay Horohoro back… to get his revenge for his sister.. hell, to get his revenge for this whole God-forsaken day.. and it was going to be sweet revenge.. oh-so-savory sweet revenge..
Anna: You sure?
Why exactly Anna was questioning this, no one really knew.. it had been clear that throughout the game that Anna was annoyed with any type of delay.. and now, Anna was delaying the game herself by asking Ren if he really wanted to go… Even Anna had probably seen the incoming doom with Tao Ren's turn, and tried to avoid it.. although she knew it wouldn't exactly work.
Ren: ::sat back down in the circle, staring at the floor:: Do you really need to ask that question?..
Anna: ::kept silent for approximately three seconds:: Sa, ikimasho…
Now Horohoro has started to pay attention.. he had spent the past couple of minutes crying over his loss of his "number one customer", Tao Jun. It's arguable that he even knew that Ren was taking his turn in the game this very minute.. but since everyone was now looking at the Chinese shaman kind of implied it… and miraculously, Horohoro caught onto the situation.. somewhat..
Ren: ::still staring at the floor:: Truth or dare…
Now absolutely everyone, including Pilica, knew that Ren was seconds away from taking out his anger on Horohoro.. it couldn't be more obvious.. you could almost see the neon sign flashing above Ren's head that pointed to Horohoro "Dead man in two minutes"..
Ren: ::looked up at the "victim":: Pilica!!
Pilica face clearly expressed that she was both in shock and slight fear. It was clear that Ren was going to use Pilica to get revenge on Horohoro indirectly… which would embarrass the both of the two siblings, just as Horohoro had embarrassed him and his sister.. retributive justice, as Ren would call it.. [Ren: Or Iron Maiden Jeanne-Sama.. hehe..].. The only question was.. what was Ren going to have Pilica do?..
Pilica: Truth.
Pilica was being smart.. she figured that having to say something would result in less embarrassment than having to actually do something, which was very, very, smart. And by doing so.. Ren wouldn't be able to get his revenge on her brother.. not completely anyway..
Needless to say, Ren was not surprised at this.. he had figured just as much. But, he was prepared.. he needed to have his revenge.. and he will. The only way to do that was to stay calm and be smart.. and so..
Ren: Okay…
You can almost feel the intensity and anticipation in the room. It would be lying to say that even Anna or Yoh wasn't curious to find out what—
Ren: Now describe to us in full detail.. how exactly you would fuck your brother..
You could almost hear everyone in the room go, "NANI?!?!?!?!"..
Ren: …in an elevator…
Now this was getting bad.. Pilica didn't think that it would be this bad. No one saw it coming.. at all.. Horohoro was as equally shocked.. he thought to himself, "What the hell does that bastard think he's doing?!.."..
Ren: …filled with people…
Now even Hao.. of all people.. was shocked.. which was not an easy task to carry out. Hao turned to look at Yoh, who looked back at him, with a face that was easily mistaken as Hao's reflection.. and equally matched the faces of everyone in the tea room… except for Ren, of course. Ren had the most serious face on. Not to mention that Manta had pretty much passed out from this.. The overall sight was pretty unbelievable.
Pilica looked at Ren in complete disbelief.. Horohoro stood up and started shouting.
Horohoro: What the fuck is wrong with you?! Asking my little sister—my little... SISTER!—such a.. such a.. graphic and disgusting question like that!!! I can't believe you!
Ren: If you don't like it.. tough. It's my turn and my decision. I'll ask who I want, what I want, and it's not your place, or anyone else's, to tell me otherwise!
Anna: He's right you know, Horohoro.. now sit down before I make you sit down.
Now the scene was truly unbelievable. Ren was completely serious. Or at least he sounded like it. And Anna, of all people, was agreeing with Ren and was allowing this to happen. To tell the truth, this wasn't what Ren had planned. Ren wanted Pilica to choose dare, but figured that she wouldn't.. so, he made up a completely outrageous question, that no one in their right, or wrong mind would answer. This, would then result in Pilica taking a consequence.. the Ren could give Pilica the dare he had intended on in the first place.
Anna: Plica-chan.. you can take the consequence option if you'd like..
Pilica: Consequence?!?! What can be worst?!
But that was just it.. Pilica couldn't think of anything Ren could say to make it any worst.. knowing Ren though.. he probably could think of something.. but she'd figure it'd be better than her current situation.. it even made her sick to even think about it..
Ren was pleased with himself.. but he didn't make it obvious though. He saw how worried and confused Pilica looked.. and figured that she would break.. which was his plan, of course.
Pilica: Fine… I can't do it.. I'll take the penalty….
Anna: You sure about that..
Pilica: ::sounding defeated:: Yeah…
Horohoro couldn't believe this.. he couldn't believe Ren. He couldn't believe that his friend would embarrass his sister like he just had, and now he had the opportunity to make it worst.. Of course, Horohoro was oblivious to the fact that Ren and Jun had felt just as embarrassed the last turn, all because of him.. Horohoro was very angry, and everyone could see it.. but no one dared to say a word, because they knew nothing could be done about it..
Ren: Okay.. Instead.. I dare you to..
Everyone was waiting.. waiting for something like "I dare you to kill your brother".. or "I dare you to actually fuck your brother in an elevator filled with people".. but much to their surprise..
Ren: .. give Horohoro a lap dance… for seven minutes.
Huh?!.. That's it?! Well.. that's still pretty bad.. but not as bad as the previous situation.. what was going on?! Everyone looked just as confused as before. Manta still passed out.. everyone looking at Ren in confusion.. Horohoro was the most confused.. What the hell was going on?
Pilica: Uhmm…
Ren: What's there to think about? It's a penalty.. you have to do it..
This is exactly what Ren had wanted. Something that would embarrass both Pilica and Horohoro.. just like Horohoro had shamelessly embarrassed both Jun and himself. If Pilica had actually done the truth he gave her.. he would have gone pretty much insane.. that wasn't one of the tope ten things that Tao Ren wanted to know.. but that wasn't the situation. She had taken the penalty, and now had to give her brother a lap dance. Sweet, sweet revenge…
Pilica: Uhh.. okay..
Hao.. being the ever-so-helpful person that he is.. disappeared in that teleport-y way that he does, and returned with a chair.. along with Opacho [Anna: O.o.. Opacho?!?!] [Ren: I felt like bringing in Opacho.. so sue me.. you know I can't stand the gender-ly challenged minion.. but who cares?] [Anna: I do!] [Ren: Well you don't count!!.. hmm? Oh yeah.. I had Hao bring in a chair cuz I never remember seeing any western chairs in any tea room in Japan.. it'd be weird.. plus I didn't want anyone leaving to get one from the kitchen.. so there you have it..].
Hao put the chair in the center of the circle and sat down.. with Opacho hopping to the spot next to him.. [Ren: Yes, Opacho hops.. not all the time, but yes]..
Everyone, including Ren and excluding Hao and Opacho, anime-sweatdropped and fell over at this. Manta then woke up.
Marco: {More sinners.. how can Jeanne-sama tolerate this?!}
Hao: Ah! Tanma! You woke up just in time for the show! ^_^
Opacho: Manta yo, Hao-Sama..
Manta: Show? What's he talking about Yoh-kun?
Yoh: Uhh.. Ren dared Pilica to give Horohoro a lap dance as a penalty..
Manta: Uhm.. oh…
Anna: Pilica.. what are you waiting for?
Ren: Yeah.. Baka-Horo.. that chair isn't there for my health, you know..
Horohoro got up and shot a glare at Ren. The sat in the chair as Pilica got up and approached it.
Pilica: Gomenasai Oniichan…
Horohoro: Don't worry.. it's not your fault.. Pilica.. ::shoots another glare at Ren.. who seems unaffected by any of this::
Pilica then took a deep breath as she threw her leg to one side of Horohoro, who looked a little bit scared, so she would be on his lap.. She then closed her eyes scared and slowly moved up and down his leg a couple of times. Horohoro also had his eyes closed as he looked a bit nervous.
Ren: Oi Horohoro! It wouldn't be right for you to have any special privileges just because she's your sister! [Ren: Hahaha!!! Payback!!! Sasuga Bocchama!]
Horohoro opened his eyes about to yell at Ren when he saw Pilica get up and go all the way around the chair from the back, hoping to waste time, and went to Horohoro's other side. She bent down and ran her fingers from her ankles to her thighs, so she'd be in eye contact with her brother, and to avoid as much contact with him as possible, then bent to approach him slowly.
Anna: Time's up! Sit down and get rid of the chair!
Pilica ran back to her seat, while Horohoro threw the chair at Ren, who caught it and threw it through the hole in the wall. Horohoro then sat down.
Anna: All right! Who's next?!
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Ren: Chapter 05 Owari!! That was much longer than the last chapter I think…
::checks clock:: 12 am?! Damn! I wanted it done before that!! Oh well.. since it is now September 1st.. unfortunately.. (I wanted it finished on August 31st so that the Author's notes from the beginning of the fic would be true.. well, they were when I wrote them.. but still..)
Tanjoubi Omedetou! Itako No Anna!!!!!
Review Onegai shimasu yo!!
