13 Doors of Lunacy

"How strange," Tianna said stepping once again out of the door that closed off her room. The hallway was dark, not the brilliant white she'd expected, and instead of the perfect symmetry, she was confronted with an abstractness that boggled the mind. The walls seemed to concave with a curve, and the doors appeared to crowd each other-- fighting for dominance of the wall. Even the floor was affected, slanting downward and off to the right of her door. "I guess I am to go this way," Tianna spoke to herself glancing down the right side of the space. She shrugged softly then began walking.

The further down the hallway she went the darker things became. The walls seemed to close in on her sides, and it was becoming harder for her to breath. Tianna kept going though, persistent on her quest to find the end of the hallway. At least she was persistent until the floor and ceiling began to squeeze in on her and she was hunched over and squirming just to fit through the space provided for her. She growled and stamped her foot, "I will stand for no more of this!" She turned abruptly, and screamed. The walls and doors were closing in behind her rapidly. Making thunderous noise, and storming towards her like a speeding train. She feared it would not stop and dropped to the floor below with her hands covering her ears.

A moment or two later, she sat up a few inches, as the ceiling would not allow her any higher, and felt around trying to get her bearings as it was now to dark to see anything. Behind her, a wall, above her the ceiling, below her the floor, yes everything was in it's place. Except... She felt to her front, the floor cut down, and then flattened again. Once again it would drop down, and level out, "Stairs? These were not here a moment ago." They were there now however, and despite that they squeezed her in the terrible manner the rest of the hallway had done she pushed forward, crawling in the dark, slowly down the stairs.

The pressure of the ceiling pressing down had begun to become unbearable when Tianna noticed that it was actually lessening. The ceiling was getting higher. However, the stairs grew larger the further up the ceiling went. "Or perhaps I am the one getting smaller," Tianna said when she was at the point where she felt she understood how a toddler must feel when trying to tackle the great feat of climbing the staircase. There were still more stairs to cover though and Tianna was not about to give up.

More time passed, and Tianna was remembering a story she'd once been read about a tiny girl no bigger than a thumb, because that was about how big she felt now, as she hung off the side of what she believed to be her final stair. She looked down and her nose scrunched up in dislike of the situation. "So high up..." She said trying to guess the distance to the floor from where she was, "eight feet I think... though it could be much higher, it really is too dark to tell. I should very much like to be bigger than I am now."

But she wasn't getting any bigger, and her arms were growing tired. So Tianna resolved to let go, all she had to do was actually make her hands let go of the edge. With one last look downward, she released her hold of the giant stair. She screamed as she fell, and fell, until finally her feet hit the cold floor beneath her and she fell back hard against the tile. "Ouch..." She rubbed her head and rolled over onto her stomach. When she looked up she spied a small doorway. Well it would be small if she were her proper size, it was actually fairly large compared to her at the moment. She crawled over to it and stood, then with both her hands on the shiny brass knob she turned it hard, wishing it to open.

The door howled in pain, causing Tianna to jump back with a scream. When she stepped back she swore she saw the keyhole moving as the door spoke rudely to her, "You little twit, don't you know it's rude to go up and twist people's knobs with out knocking first?"

Tianna stood jaw dropped and staring, "You, you are talking to me?" She motioned first to the door then back to herself.

"Yes, it appears I am. Now what are you doing twisting my knob about like that?"

"I wanted to get on the other side. Now, if you'll please just open, I can go on about my business." She walked up to the door and stood firmly with her hands on her hips. The keyhole was about as large as she was and set just off of the floor. It was moving as the door spoke.

"No can do. I'm locked."

"Then unlock yourself and open up."

"Can't. I've got no key."

Tianna may not have a key but she'd thought of another way to get into the place beyond the door. "Mister door, I really must see what's on the other side, would you mind terribly opening your mouth just a little wider so that I might peek through to the other side?"

"Curious are we? Curiosity killed the cat you know."

"I'm no cat, sir."

"Fine then, I see no harm in it," and with that said the door stopped talking and opened it's mouth a little giving a glimpse of a room beyond, filled with sand and familiar smells that Tianna couldn't quite place.

"Just a little wider please, I can't quite see..." Tianna had walked right up to the door and had her hands against the cold, brass edge of the keyhole. The door obliged and the keyhole spread open more. "Perfect!" Tianna exclaimed pulled herself up and into the keyhole, she heard the door try and speak, and felt the keyhole moving about as he tried to, but Tianna was determined to stay her course and began crawling through the keyhole. "Didn't anyone ever tell you not to speak with you mouth full? It's rude!"

Tianna dropped down into the room where everything seemed to size it should be. Her bare toes sunk into the hot sand and she wiggled them around as she looked about. "I seem to be my correct size again. I do hope I stay this way." The room was quite large, and burned with a dessert heat, and the sand was rough against her flesh. It smelled of sandalwood and other exotic fragrances she couldn't name. She saw a door on the other side of the room, yet as she crossed over the sands, images began to play across the sky.

There was a dark man, his flesh was the same gold brown of her, and his hair long and black. His eyes were mysterious, black, yet his smile was kind. He spun a child around in his arms and tossed her up into the air. The toddler was laughing and giggling, her chubby cheeks puffed up with air and her blue eyes sparkling. They both looked familiar, but Tianna was at the door and didn't wish to waste anytime getting through. "I wish I knew you. You seemed nice," she spoke as she opened the door and roamed into the next room.

The room was dark compared to the sun filled one she'd just left, she saw a little lamp, and a bed, and try as she might she couldn't quite get over to them, to touch the fabrics, and run her hands over the pillow. They were always just out of her reach. She smelled lavender and a woman appeared, and smiled softly at her as if she knew Tianna. Tianna canted a head to the side curiously, and studied the woman, she was tall and petite, with long blond hair and sky blue eyes. She seemed to just radiate with compassion and love.

Tianna reached out to touch the woman, but found herself violent thrown backwards, her back slamming against the wall across from the bed. A large man had shown up and at first she thought it to be the man from the previous room, but it was not. This man was larger, bulkier, and not even remotely as appealing as the other man. He grabbed the other woman and threw her down onto the bed, and jumped on top of her. The woman screamed but no sound came out. It was as if the man had heard it though and with an intent to silence the woman forever, he grabbed one of those pillows that Tianna and tried desperately to touch moments ago, and covered the woman's face with it.

"He's killing her..." Tianna said breathlessly and tried to run forward but found herself suddenly encased as if in glass. She banged hard against the invisible surface, and shouted as the woman's body thrashed violently under the man's. "Stop it! Stop it! You'll kill her! Stop it, please!"

The woman's body stilled and Tianna slumped down against the glass. The man stood and looked over against the other wall, at something Tianna had not earlier seen. It was a little girl, she looked a little older, but Tianna could swear it was the same girl from the first room. The little girl turned those intense blue eyes toward Tianna and spoke one word. Tianna couldn't hear it, but some how could make it out-- "Mommy?" Tianna was confused, "Who's Mommy?"

"Tianna," a soft voice spoke from behind her and Tianna turned to see Angel standing behind her in front of an open door. "Time to be done with this room." Angel faded back into the room behind her, a small hand beckoning for Tianna to follow.

"Yes, quite time," Tianna said standing slowly, and walking into through the doorway, she was immediately overcome with a great, deep sadness. It hurt her heart to be in this room. Looking around her she saw blue, that was all this room consisted of was varying shades of blue. The lighter shades surrounded her and Angel, and then grew very dark until, in a corner, the lighter blues framed a young girl. She was sitting with her legs under her and her arms resting against her thighs and the floor, her torso was curled over and her face angled downward, her shoulder length black curls shielding her from Tianna's sight.

"Her name is Mary." Angel said quietly, watching the girl, as she lifted the knife in one of her hands and cut a small slice along the soft, fleshy part of her own wrist, "She's sad."

Tianna winced at the sharp pain on her left wrist and when she looked down to it, she saw a line of red, and the sticky liquid oozing out. She looked up suddenly, confused but aware. "But she's..." She didn't finish her sentence as another sharp pain added another shallow cut to her flesh. She tried to stop it, tried to stop the bleeding, by pressing her other hand of her wrist tightly. It didn't stop and this time the pain was felt in her right wrist. "What's happening?" She cried out to the girl child who still watched Mary.

"She's hurting," was the simple reply given.

Tianna crumbled to the floor, tears brimming in her eyes. There were eight bleeding rows on each of her wrists. All opening Tianna up to the pure suffering this girl Mary had been feeling. Tianna watch as the knife dropped with a clatter to the floor beneath and left smudges of red along the pale blue tiles. Then Mary looked up and met Tianna's gaze with sad, blue eyes. The same eyes the girls in the previous room had looked upon her with. "Are they the same?"

"Not exactly," Angel said taking one of Tianna's hands and pulling her lightly, until the girl stood and followed her over to the next door. This one was different than the other doors. It was blue, and blended in with it's surrounding as the other doors had but this one had carvings on it. Tianna couldn't make the images out, but ran her fingers lightly over them before the door open and she walked slowly in, wary of what she might find on the other side.

The room was different from the cold she'd just left behind and it's warmth enveloped her until she was filled with it's invisible touch. "I like this room better," Tianna said walking further into it, waiting to see what was going to happen in this one. She already knew it would be more pleasant than the last rooms, she could just feel it.

"Some how, I thought you might." Angel said but she was walking away, passing through the next door like an apparition.

Tianna tried to follow, but when she tugged on the door knob, the door would not budge even a little. "Angel?" She called out quietly, tugging again on the door. "Why wont it open?" Tianna question taking a few steps back and staring at the door.

"Because, I don't want you to leave just yet."

At the sound of a male's voice she whirled around her eyes focusing instantly on the young man leaning against the wall to her right. He had one leg bent, with the sole of his foot pressed against the wall. His hands were in his pockets, his head was bent down, shadowing his features save for the small glow, and thing trail of smoke coming from the cigarette hanging from his mouth. He was neither the man in she saw after going through the first door, nor was he the man through the second, a dark brow arched on her forehead and she spoke with a cautious tone, "Who... Who are you? Why are you keeping me here?"

The man stood, and tossed his cigarette off to the side, it vanished before it hit the floor, and Tianna wanted to say something, but then the man was walking towards her his gaze forcing her to look into his endless green eyes. They were liquid pools of emerald and looking at her with such intensity Tianna thought she would drown if he did not look away. He stopped in front of her and cradled her bleeding wrists in his hands. He smiled and Tianna softened immediately, it was as if she no longer cared that the door didn't open. "My name is Gavin." His voice was warm like the air in the room, it held her, it filled her.

He bent forward and lifted the wrists to his mouth. He kissed the wounds gently and when he let her wrists drop the wounds were gone except for faint little scars. He wrapped his arms around her then and held her close to him. Tianna felt only then, love and warmth and a safety she had believed to be unimaginable. She didn't want the door to open. She didn't believe any of the rooms could be better than this. A creaking sounded behind her and when she turned to investigate it, she saw the door had opened. She turned back to perhaps look again into those green eyes, but found that the man had gone. "I guess I have no choice but to go through the door then." She sighed softly the made her passage through the door.

The room wasn't dark, but it wasn't well lit by the bulbs hanging over head. She saw the next door directly ahead of her and took a few steps forward her bare feet stepping into a few inches of cold water, and splashing quietly as she walked along. She tried her best to ignore the cold, and keep moving, but then the lights flickered. She paused to look up at the blinking bulbs, then having grown more aware of the electric buzz resounding her mind she rushed forward toward the door. Her hands grabbed the knob, but before it could be twisted open hands grabbed her and pulled her down to her knees in the water. She looked around trying to see these figures but all she could make out were white coats and masks, and the malicious look in the eyes.

There was a popping noise as one by one the bulbs over head broke, and she cried out shielding her eyes from the falling glass. The electric buzz was growing louder, then like lighting, she saw a current of blue slide down the unpainted walls and to the water. She screamed the current rushing straight through her. She scrambled trying to get out of the water, away from the sharp pain. Every time she got close to the door she was pulled back into the water. All she could hear was her own screaming, and the electricity ringing in her ears. She fought violent against the hands that grabbed her finally jerked the door open and stumbled wet and sobbing into the next room.

Tianna moaned her body shaking violently from the effects of the previous room, and she pushed herself up. She forced her jelly-like legs to solidify and looked around the room. The air was thick with hostility, it was hard for her to breath. One side of her a small opening in the floor. She looked down it, but could see no end, "I do not wish to know what's down there," she said then turned to look on her other side. There were no other doors, but there was another girl. She was strapped to the wall, it seemed to be with chains. The bands locked around her wrists and then attached to the wall behind. The girl had the same dark hair as the others had only she appeared a bit older, and those intense blue eyes watched Tianna with such a look, Tianna felt the sharp, familiar stab of fear. The girl just seemed..., "Why are you so mean, Mary?" Tianna asked think it was the same girl in the blue room.

The laughter that erupted from the girl was vicious, sending shivered straight down Tianna's spine, the voice was rough, as malicious as the gazes in the white clad men that had thrown her down into that shocking water. "I am not that pathetic waste of flesh and blood. I am Lilith, the bring of pain and suffering. Come a little closer dear that I might look upon you and see who you are."

Foolishly Tianna stepped closer, and Lilith lunged forward her hands momentarily wrapping around Tianna's slim neck. Tianna screamed and fought free, then in a panicked attempt to get as far from the girl as possible she rushed back, not looking where she was going and plunged straight down into the gap she had earlier decided she did not want to find out about.

Tianna was plunged first into darkness then into pool of dark liquid. It was thick and Tianna could figure swam but could not get herself going in the right direction. She struggled violent her eyes opening in the liquid, forcing her to see what was engulfing her. All she saw was red. She pushed herself up, and with some luck managed to actually get her head above the thick liquid. "Help me please, somebody!" She cried out, it was hard for her to stay above the surface, always feeling as if she were being pulled down into the depth of the liquid. She cried out again, but sank, and the liquid filled her mouth with a sharp coppery taste. She coughed, her whole body rejecting the liquid. "Blood!" She cried out, her eyes spilling forth tears that burned her flesh, "Please! Somebody help!"

Tianna noticed though that her cries were overpowered by the cries in this room. All around her sobbing echoed off of the blood dripping walls. The very walls them selves appeared to be bleeding, as if they were crying tears of blood. Tianna felt a terrible sense of loss, and clutched at her chest to try and ease the pain of her heart being ripped from her body. Of course it hadn't really been torn out, but that's how it felt. She was sinking again, and was bout to give up when she saw an hand stretched out to her. She grabbed it and was pulled up onto a thin ledge. Her chest was heaving her lungs struggling to fill with air.

She looked up into the eyes of her savor for a moment and saw those deep green orbs, and breathlessly spoke the name on her lips, "Gavin," But he was gone suddenly and the girl child, Angel, stood in his place.

She shook her head and pointed behind Tianna, "No, Gavin lays just there behind you."

Tianna turned to see, and saw the crumpled form of that man laying on the ledge. His wrists were slit from palm to elbow in a vertical stripe with, a few horizontal slices along the soft flesh of the inside of his wrist. His eyes were open penetrating deep into Tianna's core but she saw that he was not breath. She cried out and hurriedly turned away. "I don't want to be here, please, just take me away."

Angel open a small door, and walked through it easily, but Tianna had been to large for it's small frame and had to crawl through to get to the other side. The new room was bright, filled with the toys and delights of a young child. Tianna felt severely that she should be prohibited from this room due to her appearance. She was covered head to toe in the vicious red liquid she'd nearly drowned in and was certainly not of the cheerful disposition needed to enjoy this new room.

"Her name is Teeny," Angel said pointed to the small child on the far side of the room, dancing about with her teddy bear, and occasionally dropping it to play with a pink ball. "She is unaffected by the world out side these walls. All she knows are the joys and lovely things of child hood. She enjoys the naiveté of childhood, and still retains the innocence of life. Let's move on quickly, we do not want to corrupt her."

Tianna nodded and followed Angel across the room and to the new doorway. Before stepping through however, she turned back to look at the little girl. The child with her wide blue eyes was holding the ball to her chest and staring directly at Tianna. She was waving good-bye to Tianna. It appeared to be the same child she'd seen earlier. She smiled and offered back a little wave before disappearing into the next room.

Around her hung images of a new man, and Angel was no where to be seen. SO Tianna had no explanation for the dark haired man with the blue eyes. He seemed friendly and Tianna felt connected to him in some way. In all the pictures he seemed to be with a young woman. The images told of a love between them that was deep, but not of the love that lovers had. It was the love a brother and sister might have. She decide that's who this man must be-- the woman's brother. The woman herself was dark haired in some of the images and in others had bright pink hair. But undoubtedly it was the same woman. Tianna thought that she very much looked like the women she'd seen in the other rooms. The further she moved on though, the pictures got darker, she saw scenery speeding by, saw another car coming out from the fog, slamming into the car the man had driven. She'd seen the car explode in images and the man lying impaled on the beaches nearby. She cried for him, and for a long moment she did not see the door right in front of her, but as soon as she became aware of it she rushed through, not wanting to bear the sadness any longer.

As she step into the room she immediately felt withdrawn, held back as if going any further would disturb the air. All around things were frozen mid air, little orbs of glass that reminded her of bubbles, birds flying, cat's stretching, rain falling. Everything was frozen in a sort of suspended animation. Tianna saw Angel standing by the door and as carefully as possible wove her way through the things suspended in the air around her.

"This is what happens when we withdraw from the world around us. Everything freezes when we revert back into ourselves. We don't blink, don't breath, don't feel. Nothing affects us, nothing changes in us. We seem dead, barely surviving. But this happens only when we don't wish to survive, it is a sort of death, an incomplete one, where your body doesn't actually die, but you mind does."

"Can you get out of it?" Tianna asked as she reached Angel's side.

"Sometimes," The girl said and vanished into the next room.

"I wish sometimes, that I hadn't been so curious." Tianna said in a scolding tone to herself and opened the door to discover what waited for her on the other side.

As soon as she stepped into the eleventh of these rooms she'd traveled everything began to rush around her. The walls danced in a blur of neon and bright colors and Tianna's heart sped up and she could practically feel her body forcing the adrenaline into her veins. She was dizzy with the spinning lights and hues. Her ears were flooded with the sounds of engines and music so loud it hurt. Tianna was giddy from the effect of it all, feeling the wind whipping around her tossing her bloodied smock of a dress around her and causing her hair to fly about wildly. She was laughing until she couldn't breath and it stopped suddenly, the abruptness of it nearly bringing Tianna to her knees. The image of a man flashed across her eyes-- large, clean shaven head, hard brown eyes and a soft mouth. When she blinked he was gone and a door stood where the man had once been. She was overcome with a sense of curiosity greater that it had been at the beginning of her journey. He hadn't been like the other men. Who had he been? She rushed over to the door, flung it open and ran through to the other side.

The new room held man images of this man and strewn wildly about the space, cover every inch of the floor walls and ceiling. In truth it was the same image. His thick arms crossed of his expansive chest, a little smile hidden at the corner of his mouth and his brown eyes holding the glimmer of an untold joke. Different sections of this one image made up all the others that covered the room. "But who is he? this doesn't tell me who he is. I want to know who he is, I already know what he looks like, I've seen him already." She spoke to the room as if it would change at her command. "Now, who is he?"

"His name is Dominic."

Tianna turned at the sound of a voice that had recently become familiar. "Gavin... but I saw you dead..."

"We don't have time to talk about that, your journey is nearing it's end and I must get you through the door before it's too late." Gavin had grabbed Tianna by the shoulder and was pushing her toward the already opened door.

"Was that there before...when it's too late? Gavin what happens when it's too late?"

"I don't know, but it's not going to be good if we stay around here to find out." He spun around pulling Tianna now through the door and into a new room. Images played against the wall of the pink haired girl and this man. They were smiling and laughing and dancing. They were driving in cars. Tianna saw him kiss her, and saw them almost kiss dozens of times before that. Then she saw them lying in each other arms. Saw them running from the other man she'd seen with this girl. She wanted to call him Romeo but could for the life of her figure out why.

Tianna walked further into the room eyes wide at the images playing before her. She was overcome with love and happiness and loss all at the same time, but it was hope that touched her the most. New images began playing the girl was dressing, pulling white silk and lace over her golden skin, her hair was black now though, retaining only a few pink streaks. The man was dressed in a back tuxedo. They were getting married. Tianna was overjoyed at the sight of this, more so when she saw them laying again in each others arms. With soft fingertips the man traced scars the woman's back held-- angel wings. Tianna felt as if her own flesh was opening up and bleeding as the man did this. She felt as if the wings were hers and that this new man's touch would be the healing force. The images stopped suddenly, but what about Gavin? Hadn't she felt love with him?

She turned to see him sitting against one of the walls with his legs stretched out and a guitar in his hands. As he plucked away softly at the strings he sang quietly, "If tomorrow never comes, I would want just one thing," He took a breath and continued, "I would tell it to the stars and the sun, I would write it for the world to see." Then he looked up, those green eyes catching Tianna's gaze and burning deep into her soul, "And it's you... the light changes when you enter the room, oh it's you... oh... it's you..." The guitar was set aside and Gavin stood, and took Tianna into his arms.

He leaned his head down a bit and whispered in her ear, his breath brushing against her ear as he whispered to her a simple phrase, "Love him, more than you loved me, everything will be all right, I promise." Then he kissed her, until her lips caught the tears that spilled from beneath closed eyes and burned wet trails down her cheeks.

Angel's voice was soft, but held a conviction as it reached Tianna ears. "It's time to wake up Tianna. It's time to wake up. Open your eyes and remember life."