Starting Fresh

Note:I Don't Ninja Turtles, including the ones owned by Lairdor whoever.nor do I own Splinter, Casey and April. I own Rowan, Charlie, Neil and Jake. That's it. I have one more chapter after this, and then the epilougethat's itoh! This is my longest chapter by far!

~*~

April held onto Casey as they looked through the glass on Rowan. Casey had only seen her when she had dropped off Charlie; she had been smiling. Cheeks rosy, and very pretty in a young child like sort of way. Her face now was taunt and a waxy yellow color. Her hands, feet and leg had been wrapped loosely and raised slightly off the bed. An IV tube disappeared under the gauze, slowly dripping penicillin in an attempt to prevent infection.

"Where's the doctor? Shouldn't he be doing something?" Casey looked down into April's worried face.

"I'll go find a nurse and ask where he is okay? Are you going to stay here or call the guys?"

April nodded slowly, "Yeah, they're probably worried. I remember a payphone down by the gift shop. I'll go and call them."

Giving her a reassuring hug before leaving, Casey made his way to the desk and the nurse reading behind it.

"Uh excuse me miss, but can you tell me where the doctor is for my friend in there. I want to know what's wrong with her, and how soon she can leave."

Pausing long enough to book mark her spot, the nurse picked up a clipboard.

"I'm sorry but Dr. Ramey is on his break right now. I'll tell him that you were asking for him when he gets back on duty."

"Well how long is that going to take? I mean, he's a doctor, aren't they suppose to be on line at all times?"

"Yes, but even we need a bathroom break."

Casey turned to the man in a white lab coat behind him. About to say an apology, the doctor shook his head.

"It's understandable, especially with your friends condition." Casey followed him back to Rowans room, waiting impatiently by the door while he checked her status. Finally the doctor motioned him out of the room. His face set by a grim frown.

"What is it doc, what's going to happen?"

Closing the door on the still unconscious Rowan, Dr. Ramey turned to Casey.

"I'm afraid that she has deep frostbite."

"Deep frostbite? What's that? I mean, you can fix it, right?"

"Deep frostbite is the most serious stage of frostbite. And it's a wonder she didn't die out there in the clothes she was wearing." He paused a moment to glare at Casey as though he were at fault. "In this stage, blood vessels, muscles, and other parts of the body may be frozen. It can lead to permanent damage such as blood clots and gangrene in the most severe cases."

"Butshe's not severe is sheI mean she was only out there for about ten minutes, fifteen tops!"

"Mr. Jones, in this kind of weather, ten minutes can do enough to cause permanent damage."

"But, what kind of damage are we talking about here doc? What's going to happen to her?"

"Well, truth be told, I'm not sure. Her leg received more damage than the rest of her body because of the cut to the knee. Thankfully there was no bacteria from it in her bloodstream. But, it's always impossible to say how deep the damage goes. It usually takes about three days to too give an accurate diagnosis."

"So what you're saying is, you know just a much as I do."

He shrugged, " 'Fraid so. Visiting hours ended awhile ago, so I'm going to have to ask you and your wife to leave."

Giving Rowan one last look, he complied. Locating April downstairs on the phone trying not to have hysterics. When she spotted Casey she handed the phone over to him, sitting wearily down on the bench beside the phone. Leaning her head up against the wall.

"Hello?"

"Casey, that you?"

"Mikey, hey. How you guys holding up?" He heard a deep sigh on the other end.

"Barely, Leo and Splinter have been trying to figure out what to do with the other one that we have down here. Raph has been worried, although he tries not to show itthe big softy. DonI don't know where Don is. So how is she Case?"

Casey ran a hand over his face, in an attempt to get rid of the sudden weariness he felt.

"Well, the doc says that it's to early to really say anything. They have her really wrapped up like a mummy in there though."

"Is she awake yet?"

"I'm sorry Mike, she's not."

There was a pause as he heard Mike collect himself, "Alright, let us know if there's any change."

"Charlie."

Casey looked over at the soft word. April looked back at him panic stricken.

"What about Charlie? What are we going to do? He's going to be asking about his mother, what are we going to tell him?"

He raised a finger to silence her for the moment, "Mike, I think we should keep Charlie for a bit. Ya know, try to explain what happened to his mother."

"Good idea, but I don't think that you should take him in just yet. Wait until she's up, it might help the little guy deal with it."

"Yea.. Well, we've been here for a good two hours, and we're beat. We're going to head home. Talk to you later."

~*~

Leo looked in again on Charlie, then went out to join Donatello on the couch. Don looked up from the cards he was shuffling nervously as Leo sat down beside him.

"Sleeping sound as ever."

"Leo, what if" He paused, watching his hands as though they were detached from his body from the movements of the cards. "What if Jake is still alive? I mean, Raphael just left him there, we don't know if her shot went clean. I don't want to take the risk that he might still be lurking around some where."

"Well, if you'd like, when April and Casey get back, we can all go out and search for him."

"What do we do if we find him?" The cards hit the edge of his hand and sprayed out over the floor. He watched with a sigh before bending to pick them up.

"We can I don't knowI have no idea what to do with him."

Donatello allowed a small laugh. "Our fearless leader at a loss at what to do? You must really be worried."

Leo watched his brother," How are you handling all this? You must be worried sick over her."

When Don continued to pick up the cards in a slow elaborate manner, Leo reached out resting a hand on the bent shoulder.

"Don, it's okay. You're allowed to feel worried, we all are. If you would just stop and talk, you might feel better."

Leo heard a small sound, and blinked in surprise when heard the small shuddering gasps of his brothers' sobs. Don refused to look at him, instead, choosing to stand and go to the kitchen. Leo watched his back, seeing him absently rubbing the bandaged wound on his arm.

"I couldn't protect her."

"What?"

Donatello finally turned to look at him, and Leo saw the fear in his glossy eyes.

" We had trained so hard for that moment, the moment when he would show himself. But when the time came, I failed. I couldn't protect her. I almost get myself killed, and now Rowan is lying comatose in a hospital bed, with god knows what all because I couldn't protect her."

"Don, you know as well as I do that if any of us had been in the same situation, the same thing would have happened. Stop beating yourself up over something that you couldn't control."

"Think about it Leo, if you had been there, Rowan would be safe and sound, even if it would've been Mike."

Leonardo loved his family above all else, and to see one of his brothers in pain and not able to help them, hurt him more than any blade.

"Donnie, when April and Casey get back, I'll go back home and get Raph to help me look for Jake. You should go and visit Ro'. I mean, it's late. No one should be there, and you'll be disguised. It might do you good to go and visit her."

Looking at the floor, thinking, Donatello smiled and nodded. "I think you're right. Thanks Leo, guess you're momentary lapse is over huh?"

Leo smiled back at his brother, closing the gap between them in a few short steps. Opening his arms he enveloped the purple clad turtle in a hug.

"Everything is going to be alright, just be patient."

"I know." He whispered back.

The sound of the door opening caused the boys to pull back. Casey opened up the door, helping a weary looking April inside.

"Hey guys, thanks for looking after Charlie for us. I'm going to go to bed, any questions can be directed to Case. Good night."

Don asked only of the room number before leaving. Ignoring the warning's Casey tried to tell him.

"He's just anxious to see her, can't really blame him. We all are."

Casey frowned in acknowledgement. Taking the time to explain all that he learned to Leo while the turtle prepared to leave.

"Thanks again for babysitting."

Casey waved it away, "No prob, the little tyke is fun. Besides, I love kids. Oh, Mike says that it would be best to keep him here and explain what happened, and go take him to visit Rowan when she wakes up."

"Hmmtry not to be descriptive, we don't want to scare him. Just say something along the lines of she had an accident, and is going to be getting better soon."

"Yea, that'll probably work. G'night Leo."

"Good night Casey."

~*~

As he approached the hospital, Donatello pulled the hat lower on his head. Moving up to the fourth floor, he found her. Opening the door as quietly as possible, he moved to her bedside, staring at her now splotchy red skin. Wanting to hold her hand, but scared too by the fact that the slight touch might worsen her state, he satisfied himself by sitting by her bedside, gently wiping the hair off her damp forehead.

"I am so sorry Rowan, this is all my fault. I should have been prepared, that's what we were trained to be. Always on alert, always ready for anything. Heh, even Master Splinter taught us to expect the unexpected. But I foolishly thought that something like this would never happen."

He hung his head, "I was so naïve." Knowing that he couldn't spend much more time with her, he leaned over, gently laying a kiss on the bridge of her nose. Standing, he heard someone in the hallway. Looking around, he manuvered quickly into the bathroom to hide. Pushing the lock button on the handle.

He heard some movement, some one muttering something. As the voices moved closer, he heard more clearly.

"So, how's our Sleeping Beauty?" A woman said lightly.

"Hmm..I didn't want to tell the family that was here in case I was wrong, but I think that the damage went further than I thought."

"How so?"

"If she hadn't cut her leg, it wouldn't have been so bad. The top might have blackened, but it probably would've healed and fallen off later in the year. But now, I'm thinking that we might have to amputate her leg. It shows signs of gangrene, and the only way to prevent it from spreading internally is to amputate above the knee."

"Oh dear, the poor thing, and she's only twenty too."

"I know. Let me know the next time someone is inquiring about her, I think I should let them know about the procedure as soon as possible."

There was a brief pause, and the two left. He waited until he heard the click of the door closing before emerging. He wanted her awake more than anything now. Wanting to reassure her that she was safe, that everything would turn out all right. More than anything, he wanted to tell her that no matter what he was here for her.

"Look at me getting all sappy will you? That's what having you around did to me. I use to be perfectly fine being Donatello, a mutant turtle that had trained all his life to avenge my masters' master. Third brother of four, and a computer and technology whiz. But now, all I see is how wrong I am, I feel like I can be normal around you. That I am normal, but I know that I'm not. And that nothing about this is normal. And that I'll never be able to tell you I love you."

The steady pulse of the heart moniter was his only answer.

With a heavy sigh, Don pulled his hat out of his pocket, and left.

~*~

"Are you sure that this was where you left him Raph?"

"I'm positive Leo, that pile of snow over there is where I found Rowan, and right here is where he was shot."

"Yo, chill bro'. He couldn't have gone far. Why don't we just span out and check behind the dumpsters?"

Leo chuckled,"I thought I ws the leader?"

"Watch it Leo, I think some one might be vying for your spot."

"Funny I always thought it'd be y- What's that sound?"

All three paused, listening to the low growling coming from the back corner of the alley. Drawing his swords, Leo crept slowly to the sound, keeping his sense's alert. He saw a dog in the corner, the hackles on the it's back standing up as it watched Leo, feircly gaurding something behind it.

"Awwit's a puppy!"

"Keep back Mikey, I don't think this one's a petting type."

"Divert it's attention."

A whistling sound came from behind him, followed by a snide remark by Raph on Mike's account.

When the dog had followed Mike a good enough distance away, Leo moved in to inspect closer on the dogs forbidden goods. In a vary mangeled heap of blood and ripped flesh, lay the remnants of Rowans husband. The smell caused Leo to gag as he backed up, the dog, realizing that his only food was being disturbed turned back and growled viciously at Leonardo. It was then that Leo saw the blood on his matted mouth and flanks.

"Guess that amswers my question of the missing idiot."

"Dude, that is naaassty."

Sheathing his katana's Leo turned, "Come on, let's go back to the lair."

~*~

As the others filtered back into the lair, the first thing that Leonardo noticed was Donatello sitting with Splinter, looking more morose than he had ever seen him before. Motioning them silent, Splinter bade them to sit.

"Master Splinter, what's wrong?" Leonardo asked, sitting down across from his father.

"It seems Rowan will be going through a difficult period in the weeks to come."

"I don't understand sensei, what's wrong with Ro'? I got her to the hospital in time didn't I?"

Leo looked over to Don, but the purple banded turtle avoided the gaze.

"My son has found out that Miss Rowan is going to lose her leg the day after tomorrow, and that she is going to need intensive therapy to recover from it."

Donatello finally looked at them, trying his best to sound prefessional.

"I researched what I could and discovered that while the leg isn't salvagiable, her one hand is. She won't lose any fingers or toes, thankfully. But a hard black crust will form over the skin while the body tries to regenerate the damaged tissues. In a period of about four months, the skin will be able to be sloughed off or it will fall off on its own."

Pausing to catch his breath, Donatello continued.

"But, the main problem is that it is going to be extremely hard for Rowan to get about because none of us has enough money to buy an artifical limb for her. Also, April thinks it might be best for Rowan to live with her and Casey while she goes through therapy, for show purposes."

Leonardo nodded his head, "We can still visit her, and it'll do Charlie some good to get some sunlight. He's still young and needs it. Despite his protests." He finished with a smile.

"That is true, and we all need to be there for Rowan Emerson in the weeks that follow my sons. For she will need us more than ever. But the next few days will be the hardest, for all."

Splinter looked over to where the human sat, still tied and blindfolded, and sighed. So many things have fallen apart since the arrival of the misguided mother, and he wondered if the outcome would be as hard as the beginning.

TBC