AN: Thanks again for all the reviews. I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!!!!!

Don't your feet get cold in the winter time?
The sky won't snow and the sun won't shine
It's hard to tell the night time from the day

You're loosin' all your highs and lows
Ain't it funny how the feeling goes away?

Morning Sting

It feels funny being up so early. Though I have not figured out if it is early or late, I guess that's what happens when you decide not to sleep for a whole twenty-four hours. I wonder how I will survive the day.

I enter the diner to find that Luke isn't even here yet, that hardly matters, I'm simply here for the coffee. I order a large cup from Caesar and smile thinking about last night. Lane and I had stayed up the until dawn watching old movies, eating cookies and laughing over distant and recent memories. I missed her so much without even realizing it. But she didn't know what to do about Jess either. And I certainly don't have a clue.

I had one whole day free of him to think about it and what steps I was going to take next. That is the way I worked out my relationships. After three dates I contemplate on exactly how to let them off easy, either in person or over the phone; sometimes I even simply ignored their phone calls. They are just never right for me. But with Jess it's a different story, every time I think about him and the kiss my thoughts get all jumbled and I become nervous and agitated not knowing what to do; plus it's not as though we've been on any dates! It was only a kiss.

Only a kiss my ass. It was only the most amazing kiss I've had in about three years, Tristan DuGrey had been pretty magnificent too. I really need to have a long girl talk with Kylie. Lane of course had been great, but I haven't seen her in so long, Kylie knows me better than anyone. Except my Mom that is. Well Jesus Christ! Why hadn't I thought about that before?!

I slap my money on the counter and tell Caesar I am taking this coffee to go, I'll bring the cup back in later. He looks as though he's about to argue but then backs down, perhaps he remembers that I am a Gilmore and my mother is married to his boss.

I run out of the diner as fast as I can with a cup of coffee in my hands setting my feet towards home and a mother who always gives the best advice. Halfway there I am already out of breath, I stop for a moment to breathe and take another sip of coffee. Mm, it tastes delicious in my mouth. I am off again, the coffee in my cup distinctly lowered.

The house is silent and empty when I arrive, the boys must be at preschool already. I rush up the stairs to Mom's room hoping that Luke was the one to take them this morning. I knock on her door, and open it when I hear a grumbled noise coming from inside. She hasn't awoken yet, I'll have to fix that!

Placing my coffee on the night table I jump onto the bed and yell, "Mom!" at the top of my lungs.

A figure amidst the covers flies up and I can see her hair curling out in every which way, "Save the turtles!" She yells.

I laugh and laugh. "Mom, it's me. I'm home!"

"Huh?"

"Mom, there are no turtles it was just a dream. I just woke you up and it is nine thirty."

She turns to me, her eyelids heavy. "You better have a good excuse. I was at the Inn until two last night."

I kick my shoes off and say, "I need a good talk."

"And this talk could not have happened in another hour?"

"Nope, it's a matter of the utmost importance."

Her eyes widen, "Did Tom Cruise marry again?"

I narrow my eyebrows, "Wash your mouth out."

"I was just making sure." She sighs and lays back in bed. "So what'd ya wanna talk about?"

I climb under the covers with her and lay my head beside hers, "Jess."

"Ahh," she says.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Oh, I saw this coming."

"You did?"

"I'm 'joe mama'." Her eyes laugh.

"Hey I can explain!" I say defensively.

"Then explain away because I am very curious indeed." She rolls on her side to stare at me with her blue eyes.

I tell her about what happened three nights ago but it doesn't come out right. Something's can't be put into words; like the shape of the moon or his hand over mine reaching for constellations in the sky or the thickness of his voice in my ear or the look on his face at the end of the night when we said our good-byes. But she seems to understand anyway.

"You feel something for him then?" She asks.

I bite my lip and look away to the new day. "I don't know what I feel."

"Yes you do."

How does she know me so well? I look back at her, "I know what I feel, but my emotions are all jumbled. I just can't sort them out. Sometimes I remember the way he treated me and I'm angry and I can't imagine myself ever wanting to be with him again." I pause to collect my thoughts, but again the words I am speaking don't feel right to me. "Then I'll see him and my heart will beat really fast. I haven't felt that way for someone in so long. The guys I've dated lately have been so boring, they don't make me feel anything. Even their kisses are bland. It's different with Jess."

Mom raises her eyebrows, "Who said anything about kissing?"

I blush because I know I've given myself away. "We kissed yesterday when you left."

"I thought something seemed a little strange when I got back." She giggles and leans closer to me, "So how was it?"

I grin, "Amazing."

Her grin matches mine, "How amazing?"

"The best I've had in years."

She giggles again like a school girl. "I didn't know he had it in him."

"Oh, he has it."

She stares into my eyes, the grin slowly receding from her face and says, "It certainly seems so."

"What?" I ask confused. She's looking at me in such a way that she never has before.

"Nothing," she shakes her head.

I relax, "So what do you think I should do? Have any motherly advice for me?"

"I think you should just let this run its course. See what happens."

"But we only have four days left here. Actually he's only here until Friday I think."

Mom rolls her eyes, "You guys live in the same city."

"A really big city." I sigh and stare up at the ceiling, "I wish I knew what he was feeling."

"You could ask him."

"Awkward."

"But required."

"Yeah, I guess." I curl up my fists and narrow my eyebrows, "I just don't want to make another mistake with him!"

"That would suck." She says nodding.

"Not helping."

"Sorry."

I sit up and grab my coffee from where it has been sitting. I gulp down a huge sip and say, "I mean what if he just ends up being a really big jerk again? Look at the way he treated me in high school, he was an asshole." I sigh and hand Mom the coffee which she had been eyeing. "I mean we did have a lot of good times, but that doesn't make up for the way he hurt me."

"No it doesn't." She says and takes a sip. "But that was six years ago. I think he's a different person now."

My eyebrows raise in surprise, "Did you just stick up for Jess or are my ears deceiving me?"

"You're ears are in fine working order my dear."

"Than what's up?"

"We talked, Jess and I."

"Is that so?"

She nods, "I think we understand each other now."

"That's good." I say still surprised by her statement.

"Maybe you should give him another chance."

"Maybe he doesn't want one." I take the cup away from for another sip and hope what I say isn't true.

"He does. I've seen the way he's looked at you."

I blush and say like I'm fifteen with a crush, "Really?"

"Oh yeah, he's looking at you the same way you check out his ass."

I laugh and hit her with a pillow. "Shut up!"

"You know you're never going to live that down."

"Oh, please I'm not the only one with wandering eyes. The apple does not fall far from the tree."

"I do not deny this." Mom reaches out for the cup and takes a sip, "He does have a nice ass."

I laugh again and lay back down beside her. "So, should I put the past behind me?"

"Sounds like a plan."

"Okay then." I say and wonder if I can.

***

Jess is shaving in front of the mirror when he hears the knock on the door. He's already nicked himself twice because he's not paying attention. Ever since this morning his mind has been going haywire with random thoughts and imagination. He can't help but relive every moment of three nights ago, he can't help but want to make another ten batches of cookies to taste two days ago.

He has also called Sidda and hung up at the sound of her voice twice already. She knows it's him too, it's been over four months since he has done it last but she still knows. He only wanted to hear her voice again free of awkward conversation. He wanted to truly know if what he felt for Sidda was love and not simply the yearning for it. It was love wasn't it? The warm feeling that spreads through your body knowing that someone is waiting for you at home. Or the way the corners of you mouth will tug upward at the sight of them. How could he be sure?

Who does he have to compare this to? No one from Venice Beach minus the flings he had with random girls. And why can't he stop thinking of Rory while he calls Sidda?! Why does he call Sidda when he thinks of Rory? He can't possibly compare the two, can he? He never really had a relationship with Rory, unless treating a girl you love like dirt counts.

And this is where Jess had nicked himself the first time. When he thought this.

Unless treating a girl you love like dirt counts? Love? It had been a random and very sarcastic thought that fluttered across his mind. He had smirked and shook his head, he does not love Rory.

Yet he can still feel her hands under his and her breath against his neck and her eyes in the moonlight and her face when he asked her his question at the end of the night. He wonders again if she has really forgiven him, if she really did love him.

Why does he continue to think about that one night when nothing really even happened? He doesn't want this! He doesn't want the hurt and the pain and the agony of love. He can feel the pull of Sidda holding him back and he wishes it stronger.

But he thinks of the kiss and this is when he nicked himself again.

He doesn't have time to be angry with himself because someone is knocking at the door and there is shaving cream on his face and he is still half naked.

A minute later he is at the door pulling a shirt over his head and his face clean save for a small bit of cream left on his chin.

It's a good thing he nicked himself only minutes ago because he uses the sting of the razor to pull himself back into reality. It took only moments for him to fall into the blue pool of her eyes and imagine himself kissing her soft lips and tasting cookies. He reaches out for something real to bring him back, it is the cuts on his face that he finds. He thinks about the way a razor can wound and not about her warm hand. He thinks about the red dot on the piece of toilet paper he used for the first cut instead of the way she is looking at him right now. The tiny wounds on his face stop Jess from doing something very drastic; he never knew that he could be grateful for cutting himself with an early morning razor.

"Hey," he says when he finds his voice.

"Hi." She says and is already biting her lip nervously.

He wishes her to stop, he doesn't want to be reminded of her lips. He steps backwards and says, "What brings you here so early?"

"I just came home this morning from Lane's."

He smiles, "How were the cookies?"

Her smile matches his, "They were good." She pauses and looks straight into his eyes for so long that Jess once again has to concentrate on reality. "Really good."

Now he must turn away or even razor wounds will not stop him from throwing her against the wall and finding her taste. "I'm glad."

She follows closely behind him, "Listen Jess . . ."

But he interrupts her before she can finish, "Would you like something to drink?" He is already thirsty and there are beads of sweat forming on the back of his neck. It is not hot in this room so why is he gulping down a glassful of water?

"No thank you," she says her blue eyes glowing and her cheeks a soft pink.

Jess raises his eyebrows and fills his glass again because he knows the answer. Desire. "You sure?"

"Positive." She says and licks her lips. She is not looking at his eyes anymore.

"Huh, okay then." He says and drains the second glass. Their desire is so thick Jess is sure he could reach out his hand and catch it to find it tangible in his palm. He feels light headed and his finger tips are itching non stop, he rubs them against his pants.

"You have. . ." Rory reaches out to touch him but he backs away so quickly that he knocks a chair over.

"What?" He says ignoring the fallen chair.

Rory touches her own chin and says, "Shaving cream."

"Oh, yeah, well you caught me by surprise a few minutes ago." He turns to garb a paper towel and wipes his chin. "Gone?"

She nods but continues to stare at a spot by his chin.

"Ugh, Rory?"

"Hmm?"

"Did you need something?" He wonders if she can hear his loud heart against his rib cage because he certainly can.

"I wanted to talk to you." Her eyes slowly wander back up to his eyes.

Jess relaxes a little, "Oh, okay."

She takes a deep breath and knits her hands together. "Okay, right. Well about the other day. . .and the kiss. . .I just, well, I want to tell you-"

"I know, I'm sorry." Jess cuts her off quickly knowing what she is going to say, or perhaps fearing it? "I know I shouldn't have."

"You shouldn't?" She asks confused, her eyebrows raised.

Jess shrugs, "I'm sorry I, ugh, just got caught up in the moment and . . ."

"Of making cookies?" She asks incredulously.

"I. . .guess." He looks away because he doesn't want to look at her now. "I just . . .it just happened . . ." He finally glances up to see her looking away from him, her eyes are masked by her lids. Her brow is narrowed and Jess thinks her mad for being kissed. "What I'm trying to say is that I'm sorry, I won't let it happen again. It was just a mistake, right?"

Her eyes connect with his again and he feels a jolt go through his entire body. Her eyes are ablaze, blue as a Brazilian sky in mid summer. "Right, that's exactly what I was going to say." She says her voice short and clipped.

She walks backward to the door. "It was absolutely nothing, I mean I've only been thinking about it non stop for the past two days but no big deal. I don't mind that you drop into my life again and woe me with your stupid constellations and amazing kisses. No big deal. I don't know why I let you, you're just going to leave again anyway. No problem."

The door slams behind her and he can hear her running down the stairs. If he went to his window he could watch as she ran across the middle of town so angry she pulls a few leaves off a corner tree. He could watch Taylor come up to her scowling and then be baffled when she throws the leaves in his face and marches away.

But he doesn't move because suddenly the desire that had once over taken this room has been replaced. The sweat on his neck has turned ice cold and the beating of his heart slowed, the tips of his fingers no longer itch. Instead he has a head ache and all he can feel are the nicks on his face that should have stopped stinging five minutes ago.

***

If home is where the heart is than Lorelai should be sure to take her coffee pot everywhere with her. She is sitting in her kitchen thinking these thoughts while a pile of bills sits unopened before her. Sitting here at 10:30 in the morning with a coffee cup in her hand trying to sort through her bills still surprises her, she even has a bemused look on her face. She can't figure out what prompted her to haul these bills out of her junk drawer and sort through them. Perhaps it's because she has been living with Luke for so long, or maybe it's because she doesn't have to be at the Dragonfly for another three hours and her daughter had rudely woken her up thirty minutes ago.

So here she is sitting at her kitchen table with a pile of bills and a cup of coffee. She would much rather think of coffee and that's exactly what she is doing.

Fifteen minutes later Luke has arrived home and he finds Lorelai in the same exact position she was in fifteen minutes ago, except that her coffee has been refilled twice now.

Upon seeing Luke she kisses him and than voices her thoughts aloud.

Luke snorts and rolls his eyes, "How sentimental of you."

"You think so?" Lorelai says surprised.

"Most people think home is where your family is, but if you choose your coffee pot who's going to make it?"

"Huh," Lorelai says and seems stumped by this statement.

"How many cups have you had so far this morning?"

"One." The answer comes too quickly.

"Than why is the coffee pot only a quarter of the way full?"

"Rory was here."

"Actually I just saw Rory entering the diner about twenty minutes ago, you're not telling the truth again." Luke pours himself a glass of water and sits down beside his wife.

Lorelai straightens when he says this, "Oh really?"

"Yes, you definitely drank that all by yourself."

"No, I mean the other part."

"What other part?"

"The one about Rory and the diner."

"I saw her go in there a little while ago. Why?"

Lorelai shakes her head in amazement, "Wow, she works fast." She sips her coffee and wipes away a fake tear. "I've taught her so well."

"Probably too much."

"Ahh, my little grasshopper is growing up."

"I hope you don't call our kids that."

"Haven't you ever seen The Karate Kid?"

"Probably not."

"Mr. Miahgui taught me so much."

"I'm ignoring that comment."

Lorelai sighs, "We need to update your movie knowledge." She drains the last of her coffee and pushes herself out of her chair for more.

"I know you're on number four." Luke says and catches her wrist.

Lorelai raises her eyebrows, "And how is that?"

"I've measured the coffee pot to see how many cups it holds." He jerks his head towards the coffee machine, "It's nearly empty."

Lorelai lets out a little humph and sits down on his lap, "Well, at least I see the pot half full instead of half empty."

Luke laughs and lays his hands on her hips, "But it is nearly empty."

"Whatev, I'm over it." Lorelai says and kisses him. She pushes his face away for a moment and says, "I don't think that coffee pots are my home."

"I know."

And they kiss again.

"You taste like coffee."

"Deal with it."

They are still kissing when Rory walks into the kitchen without a word and into her room shutting the door behind her.

Lorelai is breathing heavily when she mutters, "that rat bastard," and knocks on her only daughters door where she can hear Rory softly crying inside.

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