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Author: Caroline Jordan 1. Moving In2. Dinner3. Male Bashing4. Mountain Dew and Dancing Games5. Who Are YOU?6. Evil Plotting7. Marriage?8. Here Comes Faramir!



PG - English - Humor/Parody - Reviews: 39 - Published: 12-28-03 - Updated: 01-18-04 id:1661309



Chapter 7- Marriage?

After the FBI had left, Aragorn cooked dinner, and they all sat down to a "family" meal. Lisa decided to join them at the table when she heard Aragorn was cooking.

Once everyone had begun eating, Brittney said, "I have an announcement to make!"

Everyone looked over at her.

"That's nice," Bryan mumbled.

"I'd like to take this moment to accept Merry's proposal of marriage!" Brittney declared.

Everyone, including Merry, gasped. They all started talking at once.

"Are you serious?!" Bryan exclaimed.

"That's great, Brittney!" Arwen grinned.

Merry just looked around. "Wha-What?"

"Don't you remember?" Brittney asked him. "Last night, I was looking at my Justin Timberlake and Eminem pictures, and you came over, took them away, and said, 'Brittney, worship them no longer. Marry me!'"

Merry raised an eyebrow in confusion. "I did?"

"Of course!" Brittney exclaimed. "See? And then you gave me this engagement ring!"

She held out her hand. On her finger was a vending machine ring with two hearts on it.

"Oh my gosh! Fifty cents! That's a FORTUNE!!!" Tippy shouted.

"Made in China!" Lisa said, examining the ring. "It's beautiful!"

"You are SO lucky, Brittney!" Ashley exclaimed.

Tracy whacked Legolas on the head.

"Ouch! What was that for?!" Legolas yelled, rubbing his head.

"YOU didn't propose to me!" Tracy shouted.

"I'm sorry," Legolas apologized. "I was...waiting for the right time."

The minute those word left his mouth, he regretted them. Aragorn and Gimli cracked up and Gandalf and Boromir were trying not to laugh.

Ignoring, them Sam asked, "Where's your ring, Merry?"

Merry looked at his hand, shocked to see duct tape around one of his fingers.

"Dude!" Peter exclaimed. "5 karat DUCT TAPE!!! Where'd you get?!"

"Umm..." Merry stuttered. "Home Depot?"

Peter sighed. "I always forget to look there!"

"When are you getting married?" Frodo asked over Aragorn and Gimli's laughter. (Gandalf and Boromir had fallen to hystaria as well.)

"In a...few weeks," he said, more like a question.

"So soon?" Eowyn asked.

"Oh, we don't want anything TOO expensive, right Merry?" Brittney said.

Merry paused. "Right."

Pippin, in his state of ecstasy, hugged Merry with as much enthusiasm as he could. "Merry's getting married! Hey! That's a good quote! Sam! Write that down!"

Hense, in two weeks, Brittney and Merry came to a chapel to become man and wife. (Author laughs hystarically.)

Standing at the front of the auditorium, surrounded by Brittney and his family and friends, Merry was shaking like leaf. Pippin, his best man, pat him on the back.

"Are you all right, Merry?" Pippin asked, concerned.

"I didn't ask her to marry me, Pippin," Merry stammered.

"What?!" Pippin exclaimed. "Of course you did! You're just nervous."

Merry looked around at the people part of the wedding. Frodo, Sam, Legolas and the junior high kids were the groom's men (Is there such a thing? I've heard of it!), Aragorn was to give a speech, Boromir and Gandalf were ordered to be the ushers, Lisa and Tracy were the maids of honor (Yes, two.), the other girls were bride's maids, Tippy insisted on being the flower girl, and, much to his dismay, Gimli was the ring bearer. Brittney thought Frodo should have that job, but when Frodo heard about it, he screamed and threatened to kill Merry. o_O

Then, the minister came behind him...Peter Jackson?

"Who are you?" Merry asked.

"Father Jackson," Peter Jackson replied.

Arwen sat down at the organ, Lisa glaring behind her, and she played the wedding march. Brittney came down the aisle with Tippy throwing flowers ahead of her, and Gimli trying to hide behind Tippy.

Brittney and Merry met at the front, and "Father Jackson" said, "Mawige!"

(Think Princess Bride.)

The others raised their eyebrows in a confused look.

"Mawige is what bwings us togever!" he exclaimed. "Wove...Twue wove!"

ONE HOUR LATER...

"Do you take Merry to be your waful wedded husband?" Father Jackson asked Brittney.

"Of course I do!" Brittney exclaimed. "Why do you have to ask?"

"And do you take Brittney to be your waful wedded wife?" he asked Merry.

Merry looked over at his friends. Pippin, Sam and Frodo were sobbing with joy; Aragorn and Legolas were smiling broadly; Boromir and Gandalf were complaining about being ushers; Gimli was hiding behind Tippy, and Eowyn and Arwen were crying too.

"I do," Merry said.

'You do?' the voice in Merry's head said.

"Yes I do," Merry repeated.

"I know pronounce you Hobbit and wife!" Father Jackson declared. "You may kiss the bride!"

Peter, Dajotre, Ben and Bryan burst out laughing as Brittney knelt down and kissed Merry.

After the wedding, they all went back to the house for a reception.

"I'd like to make a speech," Aragorn said.

Everyone groaned except Lisa, Arwen and Eowyn.

Aragorn unrolled a scroll that rolled past Ben and out the door.

"Dearly beloved...I mean, Merry and Brittney," Aragorn read. "Congratulations! We're very happy for you." He rolled up the scroll. "Thank you."

Ben raised an eyebrow, shrugged, and ate his cake.

"So..." Bryan said, "Legolas. What was that you said about you 'waiting for the right time?'"

Gimli and Aragorn started laughing hystarically again, and Legolas glared at Bryan.

Bryan folded his arms superiorly. "Just doin' my job."

(Sorry that was kinda short. But isn't it kawaii?! For those of you that don't know, kawaii means cute...I think.)

(Next Chapter: Here Comes Faramir!)

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