After All, Chapter 4
Disclaimer: Owner of Characters: Joss Whedon. Borrower of Characters: Me
Author's Note: Why is it just when things seem to be going smoothly, we come across the broken machines with wrenches lying around?
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After All
Chapter 4
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Buffy was out enjoying the night air, with a song in her heart, and a stake in her hand
Ok, forget the song in the heart bit.
She was patrolling, looking for the vamps that seem to so enjoy the San Francisco night life. Seems the undead creatures had to go somewhere after Sunnydale bit it, so the Bay Area had shown a marked increase in unexplained killings…with puncture wounds to the neck. And severe blood loss. So, the slayer was back in business. Patrolling the local cemeteries, dusting vamps where she found them.
Tonight was a quiet night, however, and it was a good time to think about her life. Again. Seems that is happening a lot these days. Or nights. As It were.
Since she was no longer 'officially' working for the council, her stipend had ceased. She had been thinking of going back to college…but right now, that wasn't practical for her. The insurance settlement on the house hadn't come through, so essentially she was like the rest of us without a substantial financial reserve… she had to work for a living.
Fortunately, she had found a position as a martial arts instructor at one of the local dojos. Finally all that training as a slayer was paying off. Though, mostly, she was teaching street fighting…more self defense than pure form. But it was something, and kept the rent paid, and food on the table. That, and the fact that Will was picking up half the rent(sometimes more) and being all smart by being a computer genius and having a consulting business.
She had been surprised when she found out that Will also was planning on locating in San Francisco. Pleasantly surprised, actually. She was glad to have her friend and confidant back close at hand… next bedroom, matter of fact. They lived in one of the less tony parts of the Bay Area…certainly not in S.F proper…you gotta be wealthy for that. But they got along pretty well, and managed to keep roof overhead, and the fridge stocked. Compared to what Will brought in, what she was making was a joke…but it certainly beat working at some place like the Doublemeat Palace. Anything had to be better than the Doublemeat Palace. Ack.
She felt a little funny about some things. I know Will is making good money, but she seems to be picking up more than her share of things…a little pride thing going here, I guess. Just feel like I'm sponging a bit. But Will says I'm crazy, and I keep the neighborhood clear of vampires…and such, so I'm doing my bit, I guess. But still, I feel a little funny about it. Sigh, what am I gonna do though? Short of robbing a bank. Slaying doesn't have that many marketable skills involved in it. I'm gonna have to find some way to go back to school, I guess.
She hears a twig snap behind her, and her slayer sense goes off. She twirls around to see a rather large vampire behind her, looking ready to take a sample, from her.
" Gee, don't you know it's not nice to sneak up on someone? What if I had a bad heart, huh? What'd you do then?" Buffy mocks the vampire.
The vampire charges her, trying to grab hold of her. She sidesteps him, and uses his momentum to throw him on his face. He springs up, and faces her. She does a flip kick, and knocks him back and off balance. He twirls around, trying to grab her arm, but she gives him a combo punch, knocking him up against a tree. Taking out her stake, she dusts him quickly.
She returns to her patrolling, and is soon lost in her thoughts again. As good as things are going, still she is having a feeling of vague dissatisfaction. As if something were missing…or she wasn't dealing with something. Something she should deal with.
And there were the dreams. Dreams which left her a little breathless, and a whole lot confused. Dreams that sensual and erotic in nature. Maybe dreams you would talk over with your best friend
If they weren't about your best friend, that is. Which these were.
And she was getting irritated over little things. And catching herself daydreaming… do you want to guess about who? When they are talking…finding herself watching Will's lips… and not hearing what she is saying…which has annoyed Will on more than one occasion. Whoa, back up Buffy, you're sound like you're in….nope…can't be. No, Buffy plays in boystown, don't ya know? Buffy isn't even a switch hitter. Sooo, something is way wrong here…isn't there?
But, if she wanted to be honest with herself… god, that's gonna happen, right? If she did, she would remember back to her first year in college. When Will was… between Oz, and Tara. Bad time for Will. But, Buffy …had these strange little habits she would do. Like, she would wake up regularly and watch Will sleep. Sometimes going as far as sitting next to Will's bed, on the floor, and watching her… Will caught her once at that. She'd fallen asleep, and Will woke up, and woke her up…Buffy had made some excuse about Will having a bad dream or something…and Will had smiled, and ran her fingers through Buffy's hair, kinda like a thanks ruffle… ok, I admit I got tingles. But I never like crawled into bed with her, or anything(though, there were a few times when I wanted to…damn, I wanted to…but I figured it would freak Will…little did I know, huh?).
When Will brought Tara by, and I got through my head they were a couple, I admit …maybe a little jealousy there? Even Will thought I was a little freaked by it…but not for the reason she thought. But, as I got to know Tara, and saw how happy Tara made her…well, of course it was cool. And I was with Riley at the time(we know how that worked out…yeah). And after that…it just got all…not possible. But there was a moment there, where something…might have happened. Might have been. Yeah, except don't think I was …there there.
I don't think I'm there there right now, matter of fact . I mean, I know … about it, and all. But I still got the image boy/girl in my head…no other combos. Ok, so what is happening then? Why are these things going on with me? Why is it when Will gets too close, I'm all so aware of how she smells…like spice and cinnamon and …maybe vanilla? And I'm oh so aware of how close her body is to mine? Why do I get little chills when she touches my hand… or arm…or if we're sitting on the sofa, watching a movie or something, and her leg touches mine? C'mon Buffy, this kinda stuff only happens in stupid romance novels. There is a logical reason. Probably cause you had a very emotional reunion getting back with Will…and are more attuned to her. Yeah. That's gotta be it. I know that's gotta be it. Maybe it's the same thing with her, too. Maybe we can talk about this. Yeah…of course. Sure we can.
Can't we?
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Faith needed a change.
This thing with Robin just aint happening. I thought this was gonna be great. Really great. We seemed to get along great, everything was 5 by 5. So, what happened? We started living together…that's what happened. I mean, ok, I know I total slob girl. I can leave stuff laying around, without being all too concerned about it. Yeah…so, I'm not gonna get into Ms. Manners top ten neatness list, or nothin'. But Robin…whoa, boy, neatness freak deluxe. He gets all wigged when I don't like pick stuff up right away. I mean, I thought we would be more alike, seeing as we were both raised 'in the system' mostly. But whereas I'm kinda …so what? It's not gonna kill nobody, he is all order and discipline and stuff( hey, get that mind outta the gutter…not THAT kinda discipline…wouldn't mind that as much). And that's just the tip of the iceberg, right? He is like Mr. Education, and me? They never built a school I couldn't escape from. He's all Mr. Three-piece-suit…and you know how I dress, don'tcha? And it's values. He's all conservative…and we know conservative is not Faith, right?
I like the guy. Don't get me wrong. He can be sweet, and he can…ummm…real nice, ya know? He's even known to make a joke once in awhile. But all in all, we're just too different. And we want different things. He wants the house and kids and stuff…and me? I'm too young for that yet. With him, anyway. Sigh. Guess it wasn't love after all, huh?
Maybe now is the time to do this. He's got this offer in New Jersey for a principal's position…he wants it. And me and New Jersey? No way. So, maybe now is the best time to part. Maybe we can do this like adults, and not like kids. Be friendly and all(if his ego doesn't go into overdrive. Guys are such babies at times). Let him have what he wants, let me have what I want. All is good. Right?
And, I'm kinda itchin' to be movin' on. So tired of the East coast, and freezing my ass off in winter. Guess living in California for so long kinda spoiled me. And anyway, now that a certain person is back from her out of the country stuff, maybe I can look her up, while I'm there. I understand she's living in San Fran, so maybe ole Faithy needs to do a golden gate tour. Whattya think? Yeah, sounds good.
I'm gonna love seeing her face when I show up at her door. Heh. She's gonna be like…Huh? Like, I'd be the last person she'd expect.
Yeah, this could be good. This'll be real good.
Faith smiles to herself, and she starts making some travel plans
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Willow is confused, and maybe just a little frustrated.
She keeps getting all sorts of mixed signals from Buffy. Sometimes it seems like its just buds. I mean, like it's always been. We hang out, and talk. And go shopping, and go out to a club, maybe, or for dinner. And rent movies, and laugh at the stupid dialogue. And just hang out, having a good time with each other.
Then, sometimes, she acts all weird. Like she's irritated with me. For no reason I can figure. And she kinda moves away, and maybe goes to her room, and listen to music, or something, or she'll go out patrolling, or take a walk, or something. And I try to figure well, what did I do? I rack my brain, but can't figure what I did wrong.
Then, sometimes, rare times, she gets…all close and…I don't know? Like she wants to do more than hang out. Be more than just friends…and I'm so for that!!!(of course, I say word one, and she'll get freaked, you know?). Cuddly Buffy. hmmm, that sounds nice. Kissy Buffy, even nicer…and of course, I can think of nicer yet. WILL…You bad. But only in the nicest way, of course. Dream on Willow, you know she… well…she never indicated any…I mean, sometimes I get this vibe…but she never really gets…beyond that. Maybe I'm just imagining it. Wishful Willow thinking, I guess.
But why does she get so weird, then? I mean… what? Do I have cooties, or something. Gay cooties. Watch OUT , Buffy…the Gay cooties might get you. Then you'll become a raging lesbo.(Willow giggles). I can see it… She cuts her hair reaaally short and goes around in flannel shirts and work boots. Yeah, that's so Buffy. Willow sighs. Man, she'd even make flannel look good.
I gots it bad. Damn you, Buffy Summers. Why do you have to be so damned cute, anyway???
Those eyes of hers. Wow. You could get lost for days in those eyes of hers. And her lips…myyy, oh myyy., I could kiss them forever. Sometimes when she's talking, I just watch her lips. Wonder if she notices? Hmmm.. and she smells so good. Like oranges and limes. Yummy. And her hair…Stop it Will. You know what'll happen you go down this road. Another little private session in the bedroom, with you biting your lip so Buffy won't hear you. God, that would be embarrassing. Especially if I (huge blush) called out her name…yikes! Can you say run faster than a rabbit? Cause that's what she'd do.
Man, this is so not good. When we held each other so tight that night we made up, I almost started kissing her right there. God, she woulda rabbited and I wouldn't have seen her for another 6 months. Even if by some remote chance she had some kinda feelings for me, like what I got for her…she couldn't ever deal. She'd be all freaked and …oh…distant? Scared? Oh…OH!!!. Like, Duh! Hmmm. Maybe this street isn't all one way after all. My, my. Maybe little Ms. Fiesta Queen Cheerleader Buffy Summers has a lil ole crush…hmmm. Maybe that arrow of hers isn't quite as straight as she thought( Willow giggles again).. Now, how we gonna get our Buffy to consider the possibilities? Hmmm…wonder if a truth spell would be useful here? Nawww…no fair, Willow. No magic. ( Alls fair in love and war). No, absolutely not. I want it to be real…and her to really realize it. Nope, gotta let her come to it on her own. At her own pace.
Of course, that doesn't mean I can't nudge things along a little, now does it?
Willow, you BAD!
You so bad!
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"Ok, we can do this. We can do this. Ok"
Buffy kept repeating that mantra to herself. Over, and over. And over.
Breathe, Buffy, breathe!
She'd been pacing her room for an hour, trying to work up her courage to go out and talk to Will. She knew she had to do this. It'd taken her nearly a week to work herself up to it, but she knew she had to do this. Otherwise, she was gonna go totally bizzaro. Those feelings she'd been having hadn't abated…they were getting stronger. And scarier. And Will was noticing something, Buffy knew. She saw the looks Will was giving her. She sighed.
This is not good, so not good. Grrr …look, we're adults here. We'll sit down. We'll talk about this. Will is gonna say I'm nuts, I'll go out, kill a couple of vamps, all will be good again(hmmm…make that a couple dozen). No big. We'll laugh about this someday…when I'm 95, and am in the Old Slayer's home, and have Alzheimer's. Yeah, then I'll just cackle at anything.
Breathe, Buffy, breathe! We can do this. We can do this. It'll be ok. No big.
What the hell is wrong with me? One little redhead that can't weigh more than 105 pounds soaking wet( whoa…Buffy, so not helping) is scaring me to death. Ok, she's a powerful Wicca. But she's not gonna like…turn me into a newt or nothin'. I don't think she will…stop it Buffy, now you're being stupid, too. Look, we're adults here. I'll .. go out there, and just get it over with. Then, she can laugh at me, and I'll be all embarrassed and crawl back into my room, and hide under the bed for 3 days. Hey, no big. Right?
Breathe, Buffy. Take slow, deep breaths. Find your center. Ok…calmly, like an adult. Go for it
Buffy walks to the door, puts out her hand to open it…and stops. She hesitates…then growls at herself, and opens the door.
"Will…Hey, Will?" Buffy calls out. No Will. " WILL?!?!?!"
Buffy sees the note on the table.
Dear Buffy,
Sorry, had to go out for awhile. Client called. An emergency. Be back as soon as possible, shouldn't be more than an hour…two tops. Know you wanted to talk about something. Wait for me, I won't be any longer than I have to be.
See you soon,
Will.
Buffy looks at the note, her face a mixture of relief and disappointment. She shrugs, not much she can do about it really. But it's not helping her nerves any. Maybe we can just put this off…again. She sighs. She's hopping they have nice music in that padded cell of hers.
Buffy walks over to the fridge, to get a juice or something to settle her stomach. Her nerves are all jangled. God, this sucks. I got myself all worked up to do this, and now she's gone. By the time she gets home, I'm gonna be a basket case!
She looks in the fridge, and notices the bottle of wine. Hmmm…naw, better not. She looks around, and doesn't see any juice. Damn… she looks at the wine. Well…ok, 1 glass. To settle my nerves. It'll help me relax a little. She pulls out the bottle, and uncorks it. She looks around, and finally finds a wineglass. She pours, and then corks the bottle and puts it back in the fridge. She walks over to the couch, turns on the TV, and does some channel surfing. She wants something with enough plot to hold her interest, but nothing too mind bending. She finally settles on an old movie…and drinks her wine.
She gets up, and gets herself another glass. The first one didn't really help, her nerves are still on edge. This outta do it, she says, settling down again to watch the idiot box.
An hour passes. Then another. And another.
Buffy is on her 7th glass of wine now. She's feeling pretty damned good. Yup. Damned good. Buffy buzzed. She giggles. Where's Will, anyway? Cute lil redhead. She sips at her wine. She thinks I don't see what's she doin' around here. I get it. Noted the skirts got a weeeee bit shorter this week…and a bit tighter on the bottom(giggles). And she seems to be leavin' an extra button unbuttoned on her blouse. She's got a honey stashed somewhere. I know it. She's actin' all silly and stuff. I mean, she's like …I dunno…but you know, you know.. hmmm… and when she leans in close, I can smell her perfume. Yeah. Got some girl. Got it. Hmmm…maybe I could go and bop her one? Nawww. If Will's happy, well I'm happy too, then ya. It's cool, it's all cool . Buffy looks at the note again. Client, my ass. She's probably out getting a lil slap and tickly stuff. HEY WILL. Ya didn't have to go that far for that. I'm right here. All slappy and ticklish. Buffy giggles. Then she frowns. Hey. How come ya gotta go out to some girl, huh? What? Do I got cooties? Gee. I'm pretty darn cute, Ms. Willow Rosenbergerer. Damned cute. You betcha. 'K, sometimes maybe I'm a bit of a tightass, but hey…you be a slayer for awhile. 'k? hmmm
About that moment, Willow is opening the door to the apartment. She notices it's dark, pretty much, except for the TV. She sees Buffy, sitting in front of the TV, a little slumped on the couch. She sighs. Probably fell asleep while waiting. Damn. Talk about lousy timing. Couldn't have had that little emergency tomorrow, huh? Willow was pretty sure Buffy was going to say something important…something she really wanted to hear. But now, she'll probably just put it off… again. Then Willow hears a snort, followed by Buffy giggling. Buffy is turned towards her now, and has a silly grin on her face.
"HEY…Will…there you are, you lil cutie" Buffy slurs a bit. She's feeling just a little fuzzy.
"Buffy?" Willow says…a bit worried. She goes over and turns on a light, and notices the wineglass on the table. She knits her brows together. She walks into the kitchen, and sees the wine bottle on the counter( Buffy didn't bother corking it after the third glass). She lifts it, and notes it's mostly gone. And it was full. Oh, boy.
"Will-ow Rosenbergerer…Wee gotta talk" Buffy calls from the other room. She is most definitely blotto.
Oh crap, she's totaled.
" Buffy honey? Maybe we should talk tomorrow? Bedtime for you, I think" Willow says, gently.
"No. Buffy wanna talk. NOW!" Buffy says… then giggles. " Weee… Buffy is buzzed!"
"No, Buffy is drunk" Willow smiles. She can't help it. Buffy is a cute drunk." Buffy should be in bed"
"WOW. Will…you're so …hot" Buffy says, weaving slightly as she approaches Willow.
Willow blushes. She had been wearing more…ummm…revealing? Clothing. Leaving a few buttons strategically undone. Hoping Buffy would get the hint. But, not a sloshed Buffy. Sigh.
Buffy is in front of Willow. She puts her arms on Willows shoulders, and leans in close…very close. Willow is a little…taken aback. We're talking about a woman with incredible strength here.
"Ya know somethin', Ms. Rosenbergerer…you got pretty eyes!" Buffy grins at her, maybe inches from her face. Willow feels the flush creeping up her neck.
God, why can't she say that when she's sober? Crap.
" C'mon, Baby. I think you better go to bed…don't you?" Willow is doing her best to get her friend in bed, and safe.
"No, Buffy no wanna go bed. Buffy wanna play" Buffy has a goofy grin." With Will" Buffy pulls will a little closer.
Oh, goddess, you so love to torture me. Willow tries to gently disengage Buffy, but Buffy holds her fast.
"Buffy wanna kiss Will" Buffy says. Willow's eyes go wide… then two very soft lips capture hers. For a brief second, she responds. I mean, she's wanted this like…forever. Then her mind reengages, and she pulls away.
"No…Buffy…NO" Willow says. She manages to pull herself from Buffy.
Buffy's face collapses into a frown. She says, a little slurred." No?"
"No. not tonight Buffy." Willow says.
" 'K, I got it. You don't like me" Buffy says, a little mournfully. " No big"
God, Buffy, you got it so wrong. But no way we're doing this with you like this.
"No, Buffy, that's not it at all" Willow says, feeling very tired.
"S' ok, Will. I'm not dumb. You gotta girlfriend, somewhere. You been dressin' all sexy all week. I got it. No big" Buffy says, turning away. "I'm goin' t' bed now"
Yeah, been dressing sexy for YOU, silly. God, this is hard.
" No, Buffy…wait…" Willow says, but is waved off by Buffy.
"'S' ok, Will." Buffy says, a bit resigned. She starts towards her bedroom
At that moment, there's a knock at the door.
"Buffy, wait here. We gotta talk about this" Willow says. Buffy stops. Willow walks to the door, and answers it.
Standing there is Faith. She is carrying a shoulder bag, and is grinning her most flirty grin.
"Heya, Red. How are ya?" Faith asks…and gives her the once over. " Looking cute as always. Hey, can you help out a homeless girl here and give me a place to bunk for a few days?"
Willow is speechless. What is she doing here? Unbeknownst to Willow, Buffy has come up behind her.
"Faith?" Buffy asks, suddenly feeling the wine shrug off her
"B?" Faith replies, a bit startled
Both think the same thing, at the same time
"What the hell is SHE doing here? Crap!!!"
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TBC.
Heh. Heh. Heh. Curveball, anyone?
