So what does it matter
What I want to do
All the paths that I take
They all just lead to you.
So what does it matter
If I turn away today
You know that tomorrow
Is going to be the same.
This world is so defined
All my movements' chosen
And I chose to hide here in this mist
And tomorrow I'll still exist.
---
Hedwig looked down from the top of the swing set, seeing him there, head down, trembling slightly from the pressure of his sobs. The young boy. The old man. The teenager that was in the midst of a time of fun, a time of joy. No more. For now he was a man forced into a world of demons and danger. A world that never stopped for him, until the moment where his destiny would be fulfilled, and the conclusion written. For he was just that. A story to be passed down generation to generation as people awed at his power. But for the boy, and his friends, the world around them was anything but a story. It was life.
---
"Has [i]anyone[/i] heard from Harry?" Hermione asked Ron over the phone that he had finally learned to use a week earlier.
"The Order must be getting letters from him. They haven't gone storming onto Privet Drive yet. Hey, what's that beeping noise?" Ron asked, pulling the contraption away from his head and shaking it a bit to see if it was still working. Muggles. They had the strangest ways of communication.
"It's call waiting. Just ignore it, it will go away," Hermione said impatiently. "He can't be okay. He hasn't written at all this summer! That's not like him. The Dursley's obviously aren't keeping him from sending out letters if the Order is getting them. You'd think that he would take the time to write to us," she said, sadness now filling her voice along with worry. She cared for Harry and wondered about him constantly. She had tried calling him, but whenever she did, Harry's uncle told her that Harry wasn't there. "Where could he be." she whispered, more to herself than to Ron on the other end.
"I don't know mate. It's the strangest thing. I keep asking my dad about him but he won't say anything. He just keeps saying 'Harry is fine' over and over again. If he was fine, he would have written to us begging to leave the Dursley's already. I know Harry. He can't stand staying with those nuts any longer than he has too. I'm really worried about him Hermione," Ron said, finally admitting what they both knew was true. "He hasn't said a thing about Sirius to us since he died. That can't be normal. Him keeping it all inside like that. Just imagine going through all that!" he said, shivering at the thought of anyone in his family dying, the thought of his dad in the hospital still fresh in his mind.
"I know Ron," Hermione whispered. "I know."
---
It had been three weeks since Harry had left Hogwarts and began living with the Dursley's again. In those three weeks he hadn't said a word to any of them, and the only time that he communicated with anyone was his letters to the Order stating that he was still alive.
Harry had his suspicions about what the Order was doing out there. They must have figured out that he wasn't normal. It wasn't as if he was hiding it. He hadn't made any requests to leave the house and to go live with the Dursley's. All his letters said were "I'm fine" with a scribbled signature at the bottom. Some days, even that act was too much for Harry, but the thought of the wizards swooping down on him convinced him to move.
Harry lay in a ball, curled up on his bed. Subconsciously he knew that they would notice something. He tried to care about what would happen to him, but he just couldn't make himself bother. After all, no matter what he did, wouldn't he still end up having to fight for his life? Did it really matter if he didn't write to the Order for one day? No matter what he did, his life was laid out and destiny was before him. Harry would be fighting one of the two strongest wizards in the world, and there was no way to get around it. He even pondered what would happen if he killed himself. Would he simply come back to life to defeat the Dark Lord? It couldn't be as simple as that, he knew. But Harry knew that he wouldn't do anything that drastic. Too many people were depending on him, and he couldn't let them down no matter what he felt. The story of his life, all in the name of preserving life.
He was still in fetal position when the doorbell rang below him. Harry heard voices below that sounded familiar, but he still didn't move. That was the position that Hermione and Ron found him in when they walked up the stairs and into his tiny bedroom. Harry had heard his door open, but the connection wasn't made that people were actually standing in his room. Even when Ron spoke, it took a beat before Harry opened his eyes and warily turned over.
"Bloody hell. What happened to you mate?" Ron asked, staring in shock at what was his best friend.
"Tact Ron, tact!" Hermione said, hitting him in the sides. She had to admit though, Ron was simply stating what they were both thinking. What happened to their friend that was strong and could get through it all? The boy that was lying in front of them was anything but that.
Harry was pale, weeks of staying inside or only going out at night causing the lively color that was normally there to vanish completely. His eyes had sunk in, telling his two best friends that sleep had been evasive also. He was thin, for eating wasn't something that he cared about. A faint shadow was also beginning to cover his face, appearing more as dirt than the beard that it truly was.
"What." Harry paused, clearing his throat. His voice was weak and scratchy from the weeks of not using it. "What are you doing here?" he asked, avoiding their gaze and turning instead to the pillow that he was laying on.
"Oh Harry," Hermione whispered, rushing over to the bed and pulling Harry into her arms. "We came to get you. Just in time it seems. Why didn't you write? Call? We sent you gifts on your birthday," she said, looking over at the unopened stack of presents that were on Harry's desk.
Harry struggled out of Hermione's grasp, curling up into the corner of his bed still not looking at the two of them. Hermione turned pleading eyes up to Ron, not knowing what to say or do. Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks, and Mad-Eye Moony were all waiting downstairs for them. They expected Ron and Hermione to get Harry ready and downstairs relatively quickly. Everyone knew that Harry wasn't doing good, but this was more than anyone had imagined.
Ron looked around the room, not sure what to do either. Spotting Harry's trunk, he went over to it to pack it. Frowning, Ron saw that it was still packed from when Harry had arrived at Privet Drive. Ron looked up at Harry carefully, wondering what to make of all these new developments. He grabbed the few items off Harry's desk and put them into the trunk, pushing it next to the door before going and sitting next to Harry on the bed.
"Listen mate, we're here to take you away. We're going to go to the Burrow for a bit, and then probably Siri - Grimmauld Place," Ron said, mad at himself for almost saying Sirius' name in front of Harry when he knew that it wasn't a good idea.
Harry's head snapped up and he narrowed his eyes at Ron. "No, you can go. I'm going to stay here. I don't want to go.there," he said, leaving it at that and turning to look out the window.
"Harry, come on. You hate it here. At the Burrow you can be with us. We don't even have to go to.that other place if you don't to. Please Harry, it'll be better," Hermione said, trying to soothe him. "You have to come, there are things that need to be done," she added, thinking that telling him that there were duties to be accomplished would be better.
Harry sprang from the bed and started pacing back in front of them, words rapidly spilling from his mouth. "Of course there are things that need to be done! When isn't there something to be done? When am I not needed to do something? Goodness forbid if I want to be ALONE for five minutes of my life. Every move that I make is watched. Everything that I do is monitored. I can't walk out the door without people wondering what I'm doing and where I'm going because it's too 'dangerous' to do anything stupid.
I'm important. I have a destiny. I can't mess that up, because things will crumble right before my very eyes," Harry said, continuing though Hermione and Ron still had no idea about the Prophecy. "And what if I don't come? What if I say no for once? Are you all going to come and attack me?" Harry asked, his voice angry and bitter as he stared at his two friends.
Hermione and Ron were in state of shock. They looked up at Harry, confused about what he was talking about and worried about what was going on with him. Luckily, they didn't have to worry about it anymore. At that moment, the door to the room opened and Remus Lupin walked in quietly.
"Ron, Hermione, thanks. You can go and wait downstairs. Harry and I will join you shortly," he said, smiling at the two as they got up and left the room as fast as they could, shooting worried glances at Harry.
Remus looked at the room, quietly observing the darkness and the disarray that it was all in. He said nothing for a few moments, choosing instead to look at Harry who was still breathing heavily in a corner of the room.
"Sit down, Harry. I have things that you need to know," Remus said, pointing to the bed.
"I don't want to know," Harry said.
"I'm afraid that you don't have much of a choice Harry," Remus replied, his voice sad yet determined.
What I want to do
All the paths that I take
They all just lead to you.
So what does it matter
If I turn away today
You know that tomorrow
Is going to be the same.
This world is so defined
All my movements' chosen
And I chose to hide here in this mist
And tomorrow I'll still exist.
---
Hedwig looked down from the top of the swing set, seeing him there, head down, trembling slightly from the pressure of his sobs. The young boy. The old man. The teenager that was in the midst of a time of fun, a time of joy. No more. For now he was a man forced into a world of demons and danger. A world that never stopped for him, until the moment where his destiny would be fulfilled, and the conclusion written. For he was just that. A story to be passed down generation to generation as people awed at his power. But for the boy, and his friends, the world around them was anything but a story. It was life.
---
"Has [i]anyone[/i] heard from Harry?" Hermione asked Ron over the phone that he had finally learned to use a week earlier.
"The Order must be getting letters from him. They haven't gone storming onto Privet Drive yet. Hey, what's that beeping noise?" Ron asked, pulling the contraption away from his head and shaking it a bit to see if it was still working. Muggles. They had the strangest ways of communication.
"It's call waiting. Just ignore it, it will go away," Hermione said impatiently. "He can't be okay. He hasn't written at all this summer! That's not like him. The Dursley's obviously aren't keeping him from sending out letters if the Order is getting them. You'd think that he would take the time to write to us," she said, sadness now filling her voice along with worry. She cared for Harry and wondered about him constantly. She had tried calling him, but whenever she did, Harry's uncle told her that Harry wasn't there. "Where could he be." she whispered, more to herself than to Ron on the other end.
"I don't know mate. It's the strangest thing. I keep asking my dad about him but he won't say anything. He just keeps saying 'Harry is fine' over and over again. If he was fine, he would have written to us begging to leave the Dursley's already. I know Harry. He can't stand staying with those nuts any longer than he has too. I'm really worried about him Hermione," Ron said, finally admitting what they both knew was true. "He hasn't said a thing about Sirius to us since he died. That can't be normal. Him keeping it all inside like that. Just imagine going through all that!" he said, shivering at the thought of anyone in his family dying, the thought of his dad in the hospital still fresh in his mind.
"I know Ron," Hermione whispered. "I know."
---
It had been three weeks since Harry had left Hogwarts and began living with the Dursley's again. In those three weeks he hadn't said a word to any of them, and the only time that he communicated with anyone was his letters to the Order stating that he was still alive.
Harry had his suspicions about what the Order was doing out there. They must have figured out that he wasn't normal. It wasn't as if he was hiding it. He hadn't made any requests to leave the house and to go live with the Dursley's. All his letters said were "I'm fine" with a scribbled signature at the bottom. Some days, even that act was too much for Harry, but the thought of the wizards swooping down on him convinced him to move.
Harry lay in a ball, curled up on his bed. Subconsciously he knew that they would notice something. He tried to care about what would happen to him, but he just couldn't make himself bother. After all, no matter what he did, wouldn't he still end up having to fight for his life? Did it really matter if he didn't write to the Order for one day? No matter what he did, his life was laid out and destiny was before him. Harry would be fighting one of the two strongest wizards in the world, and there was no way to get around it. He even pondered what would happen if he killed himself. Would he simply come back to life to defeat the Dark Lord? It couldn't be as simple as that, he knew. But Harry knew that he wouldn't do anything that drastic. Too many people were depending on him, and he couldn't let them down no matter what he felt. The story of his life, all in the name of preserving life.
He was still in fetal position when the doorbell rang below him. Harry heard voices below that sounded familiar, but he still didn't move. That was the position that Hermione and Ron found him in when they walked up the stairs and into his tiny bedroom. Harry had heard his door open, but the connection wasn't made that people were actually standing in his room. Even when Ron spoke, it took a beat before Harry opened his eyes and warily turned over.
"Bloody hell. What happened to you mate?" Ron asked, staring in shock at what was his best friend.
"Tact Ron, tact!" Hermione said, hitting him in the sides. She had to admit though, Ron was simply stating what they were both thinking. What happened to their friend that was strong and could get through it all? The boy that was lying in front of them was anything but that.
Harry was pale, weeks of staying inside or only going out at night causing the lively color that was normally there to vanish completely. His eyes had sunk in, telling his two best friends that sleep had been evasive also. He was thin, for eating wasn't something that he cared about. A faint shadow was also beginning to cover his face, appearing more as dirt than the beard that it truly was.
"What." Harry paused, clearing his throat. His voice was weak and scratchy from the weeks of not using it. "What are you doing here?" he asked, avoiding their gaze and turning instead to the pillow that he was laying on.
"Oh Harry," Hermione whispered, rushing over to the bed and pulling Harry into her arms. "We came to get you. Just in time it seems. Why didn't you write? Call? We sent you gifts on your birthday," she said, looking over at the unopened stack of presents that were on Harry's desk.
Harry struggled out of Hermione's grasp, curling up into the corner of his bed still not looking at the two of them. Hermione turned pleading eyes up to Ron, not knowing what to say or do. Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks, and Mad-Eye Moony were all waiting downstairs for them. They expected Ron and Hermione to get Harry ready and downstairs relatively quickly. Everyone knew that Harry wasn't doing good, but this was more than anyone had imagined.
Ron looked around the room, not sure what to do either. Spotting Harry's trunk, he went over to it to pack it. Frowning, Ron saw that it was still packed from when Harry had arrived at Privet Drive. Ron looked up at Harry carefully, wondering what to make of all these new developments. He grabbed the few items off Harry's desk and put them into the trunk, pushing it next to the door before going and sitting next to Harry on the bed.
"Listen mate, we're here to take you away. We're going to go to the Burrow for a bit, and then probably Siri - Grimmauld Place," Ron said, mad at himself for almost saying Sirius' name in front of Harry when he knew that it wasn't a good idea.
Harry's head snapped up and he narrowed his eyes at Ron. "No, you can go. I'm going to stay here. I don't want to go.there," he said, leaving it at that and turning to look out the window.
"Harry, come on. You hate it here. At the Burrow you can be with us. We don't even have to go to.that other place if you don't to. Please Harry, it'll be better," Hermione said, trying to soothe him. "You have to come, there are things that need to be done," she added, thinking that telling him that there were duties to be accomplished would be better.
Harry sprang from the bed and started pacing back in front of them, words rapidly spilling from his mouth. "Of course there are things that need to be done! When isn't there something to be done? When am I not needed to do something? Goodness forbid if I want to be ALONE for five minutes of my life. Every move that I make is watched. Everything that I do is monitored. I can't walk out the door without people wondering what I'm doing and where I'm going because it's too 'dangerous' to do anything stupid.
I'm important. I have a destiny. I can't mess that up, because things will crumble right before my very eyes," Harry said, continuing though Hermione and Ron still had no idea about the Prophecy. "And what if I don't come? What if I say no for once? Are you all going to come and attack me?" Harry asked, his voice angry and bitter as he stared at his two friends.
Hermione and Ron were in state of shock. They looked up at Harry, confused about what he was talking about and worried about what was going on with him. Luckily, they didn't have to worry about it anymore. At that moment, the door to the room opened and Remus Lupin walked in quietly.
"Ron, Hermione, thanks. You can go and wait downstairs. Harry and I will join you shortly," he said, smiling at the two as they got up and left the room as fast as they could, shooting worried glances at Harry.
Remus looked at the room, quietly observing the darkness and the disarray that it was all in. He said nothing for a few moments, choosing instead to look at Harry who was still breathing heavily in a corner of the room.
"Sit down, Harry. I have things that you need to know," Remus said, pointing to the bed.
"I don't want to know," Harry said.
"I'm afraid that you don't have much of a choice Harry," Remus replied, his voice sad yet determined.
