"Remind me again why we're here, Aemilia," Remus said.
Aemilia gave him a Look. "You are here," she told him, "because you are the closest thing Harry Potter has to a father figure at present. I am here because I am your lawyer. And Snape is here because he's intimidating."
There was a derisive snort from Severus's direction.
"No, Aemilia," Remus said, "remind why we're here. Here as in hiding under an Invisibility Cloak in the Dursleys' flowerbed instead of knocking on the door like normal people!"
"Because I want to see how they react to getting the owl, you idiot!" Aemilia snapped. "I know they haven't got it yet, because I checked the Gringotts register, and the owl was only sent out this morning, due to arrive at 7:16pm tonight. Gringotts aren't as efficient as they pretend."
"Can you here something outside, Petunia?" Dursley certainly bellows loudly enough to warn any intruders away. I wonder if that's the idea, Remus thought wryly.
"Both of you, shut up!" Severus hissed.
"No, dear, did you?" Petunia Dursley had a voice that would curdle new milk.
Vernon grunted. "Thought I did, but it was probably nothing. The boy's locked in his room - doing homework, he says - so all should be well."
"That's what you think, Dursley," Aemilia whispered. "Look!"
Remus looked up. An owl soared overhead - an owl that was not Harry's Hedwig - and it was headed straight for the Dursleys' kitchen window. Prepare for fireworks, he thought, and the owl connected.
Petunia shrieked as shattered glass was sprayed through her kitchen at high velocity, the owl landing with a soft whump on the kitchen table. "Vernon!"
"BOY!" Vernon roared. "BOY, GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!"
Petunia was shaking. "Vernon, it's not addressed to him. It's addressed to - us."
"What?" Harry had arrived in the kitchen, and he didn't sound particularly happy.
Vernon advanced on him. "WHAT," he bellowed, "IS THE MEANING OF THIS?" He thrust the envelope into Harry's hands.
Harry looked at him coolly. "Well, for one," he said, "it's addressed to you, not me, so I don't see how it can be my fault."
"I WON'T TAKE ANY OF YOUR CHEEK, BOY! WHAT THE RUDDY HELL IS IT?"
Harry turned the envelope over and looked at the seal. "It's from Gringotts," he said shortly.
"WHAT THE RUDDY HELL IS THAT?!"
"A BANK!" Harry roared back. Remus was mildly surprised. He hadn't known Harry could yell like that - or, indeed, stand up to his uncle like that.
"Well - what do they want with us, then?" Vernon demanded, a little less loudly.
"How am I supposed to know? Open the envelope and you just might find out," Harry snarled.
Vernon, after a long and vehement glare at Harry, slit the envelope with his thumb.
"What does it say, Dad?" a fat boy that Remus recognised as Harry's cousin Dudley demanded eagerly.
Aemilia nudged Remus and Severus. "Time to make our move," she whispered, pulling the Invisibility Cloak off them and shoving it into her bag, then knocking sharply on the door of Number Four Privet Drive.
*
"Aemilia Fudge, LLB, International Magical Office of Law Official Representative, Counsel for the case of Remus Lupin regarding the contesting of the will of the late Sirius Black," Aemilia rattled off as soon as Vernon Dursley opened the door, before he had time to so much as grunt, "what?" She flashed her identification and a second document that Remus recognised as an entry warrant in Vernon's face. "Legally, you must invite us in to discuss this case."
"Under what ruddy law?" Vernon demanded.
"Clause 49c), Item vii) in the Legal Requirements regarding the Contesting of Last Will and Testament as stated on this warrant," Aemilia replied.
Vernon appeared stumped. "Well… who are these -" Severus raised an eyebrow and he visibly quivered, "- men?"
"Remus Lupin, Lieutenant of the Order of the Phoenix, contesting the will of Sirius Black," Remus answered firmly, flashing his identification card in Vernon's face.
Severus just looked at Vernon. "Severus Snape," he said silkily, and Vernon visibly cowered.
Aemilia was definitely right about Snape being intimidating, Remus thought, as they followed Vernon into the house.
*
Harry's jaw visibly dropped when Remus, Aemilia and Severus walked into the kitchen. "Professor Lupin!" he exclaimed.
Remus hadn't expected Harry to bodily throw himself on him, but he took it in good stead, returning the boy's embrace. "It's good to see you, Harry," he said, patting him on the back gently.
Harry drew back, and Remus saw that his face was tear-stained. He had been crying before Vernon had roared at him to come downstairs, then. "Yes," Harry said simply. He turned away a little. "Uh… hello, Professor Snape."
Severus jerked his head in what Remus supposed might be considered a nod of acknowledgment. "Potter."
Harry looked awkwardly at Aemilia for a second before she took control of the situation. "Aemilia Fudge," she said, taking Harry's hand firmly and shaking it.
Harry looked at her suspiciously. "Fudge? As in Cornelius? The Minister of Magic?"
"Yes. I'm his daughter but he disowned me. Long story, very boring. The long and short of it is that I'm a lawyer, and I'm representing Remus, who is contesting the will of Sirius Black."
"Who in blazes is Sirius Black?" Vernon demanded.
"My godfather," Harry replied shortly.
Vernon's eyes practically lit up. "So this infamous godfather of yours got himself killed, eh?"
In a flash, Remus had his wand out, pointed at Vernon. "If you ever speak about Sirius Black like that again," he growled, "you will have to deal with me."
"And why in blazes should I be afraid of you?" Vernon demanded.
"You obviously didn't look very closely at my identification card, did you?" Remus snarled. "Take a closer look." He thrust the card at Vernon.
"W-werewolf?" Vernon stammered.
Remus smiled the lazy smile he knew made him look wolfish. "Yes," he said. "So I think you agree it would be wise not to insult Sirius Black in my presence." Low blow, Remus, he thought, but it had, at least, worked.
Sweat beaded on Vernon's brow and began to trickle down his face. Dudley gave a frightened whimper and scuttled behind his mother. For an eerie moment, Dudley reminded Remus of Peter Pettigrew.
"All - all right, then," Vernon stammered, and Remus tucked his wand back into the sleeve of his robes.
"Let's get this over with, then," Aemilia said brightly, breaking an awkward silence. "I'm sure you're a reasonable man, Mr. Dursley, so this shouldn't be too much trouble."
Wise move, Aemilia, Remus mentally applauded her. Flattery will get you places that intimidation won't.
"What - what appears to be the problem, then?" Vernon asked, wiping the sweat of his face with a rather large handkerchief.
"At the death of Mr. James and Mrs. Lily Potter - heaven rest their souls - certain papers were transferred from their possession to the account of Mr. Sirius Black, who was Mr. Potter's best friend," Aemilia explained, maintaining a smile Remus was sure would break her cheekbones. "However, the late Mr. Black was arrested before he could be informed of these papers, and consequently, on his own death -" Harry sobbed and turned away, hiding his face, "- these papers were unaccounted for in his will."
"Don't see how it concerns us," Vernon grunted.
If anything, Aemilia's smile grew even wider. "Well, you see, this is where the problem is. Under law, these papers should pass to the heir of Mr. and Mrs. Potter - who is of course, Master Harry." She indicated Harry with a nod of her head. "However, due to certain other legal requirements, the papers need to pass to someone of age, which Master Harry is not. Therefore, they pass to you, as his legal guardians."
Remus could see the wheels in Vernon's mind turning. "And you want us to give these papers to you."
"That's the long and short of it, yes," Aemilia replied.
"And why should I do that?" Vernon began to smile, and Remus's heart sank. Sweet Merlin, don't play games with us, Dursley! You are playing games with more lives than you know!
"These papers contain certain information that would be of immense use to the Order of the Phoenix, given the nature of the research of Mr. and Mrs Potter at the time they died." Remus could almost hear Aemilia's determination not to falter.
"What's in blazes is the ruddy Order of the Phoenix?" Vernon demanded.
"Have you ever heard of Voldemort, Mr. Dursley?" Much as Remus hated to admit Severus Snape was good at anything, he was certainly good at intimidation.
"Yes," Vernon snapped, "and he's no concern of mine."
"NO CONCERN OF YOURS?" Harry yelled. "HE BLOODY WILL BE YOUR CONCERN WHEN HE COMES AND KILLS YOU!"
"DON'T YOU SPEAK LIKE THAT TO ME, BOY, OR I'LL RUDDY KILL YOU!" Vernon roared back, advancing menacingly on Harry.
In an instant, Remus's wand was out and pointed at Vernon. "You will not touch the boy!" he snarled.
"Unless, of course," Severus added delicately, his voice containing traces of steel under the silk, "you wish to be prosecuted for assault by the formidable Miss Fudge here."
Harry looked at Remus, confused. Why is Snape protecting me? Remus could almost hear him think.
He wasn't sure he knew why himself.
"The Order of the Phoenix," Aemilia said, although she must have known that Vernon would be far more preoccupied with Remus's wand pointing at his throat than what she was saying, "is a coalition of wizards fighting against Voldemort. A resistance effort, you might say. The consequences, if Voldemort were to be triumphant, would be dire, even for non-magical people like yourselves."
"And these papers of my sister," Petunia squeaked, "would be… useful?"
"Yes, Mrs. Dursley," Aemilia replied. "Extraordinarily useful. They might even turn the course of the war. Which is why we need them."
"If we were to give you these papers," Vernon asked slowly, still staring at Remus's wand, "what would we have to do?"
"Merely sign this paper." Aemilia pulled a piece of parchment out of her bag. She nodded at Remus, and he pocketed his wand again.
Vernon picked up the paper and examined it. "So, if I sign this, I give up all claim to these papers of the boy's parents?"
"Yes," Aemilia answered.
"The papers would then pass into my hands," Remus added.
Vernon looked up from the paper to Aemilia, and, as a smile spread across his face, Remus knew, with a sickening crunch, what he was going to do. "You know," Vernon said, still smiling, "I don't think I will sign this."
And he tore the writ in half.
*
"Mr. Dursley," Severus said, voice still mellifluous but hard, "do you understand what you are doing?"
"Your lot have mucked about in my life long enough," Vernon replied maliciously, "and now I'm going to muck about in yours."
"You are risking lives, Mr. Dursley!" Remus exclaimed.
Petunia tugged at her husband's arm. "Vernon," she whispered urgently, "don't you think it would be better if you just gave them what they wanted? What possible use can my sister's papers be to us?"
"No, Petunia," Vernon told her. "I'm going to stick to my guns. You can't have your ruddy papers," he told Aemilia, "so you can get out of my house now."
Aemilia's eyes hardened. "I am a lawyer, Mr. Dursley," she told him. "Do you really think it would be that easy to get rid of me?" She pulled another piece of parchment from her bag. "This, Mr. Dursley, is a subpoena. If you will not willingly hand over the Potters' papers to me, then I will contest you for them in a court of law. On August the 14th at the Ministry of Magic, to be precise. In front of the entire Wizengamot."
"WHAT?" Vernon roared. "A COURT OF - YOUR LOT?"
"Yes, Mr. Dursley," Aemilia replied, "a court of our lot, subject to our laws. That is, of course, unless you wish to sign the papers over to Mr. Lupin willingly."
"Vernon," Petunia whispered, tugging on his shirt sleeves, "perhaps it would be wise -"
"NO!" Vernon bellowed. "I'M NOT GIVING YOU YOUR RUDDY PAPERS!"
Aemilia looked at him sharply. "Fine," she said. "I shall expect to see you in court, then, Mr. Dursley."
"A Portkey will be provided for you on August the 13th," Severus added, his voice honeyed and unpleasant.
"What's a Portkey?" Dudley squeaked.
Severus fixed Dudley with a stare that Remus suspected would have melted more cauldrons than Neville Longbottom. "You are a dunderhead, Master Dursley," he told Dudley, "and I am exceedingly glad I do not have the responsibility of teaching you."
"Don't talk to Dudley like that!" Vernon snapped, putting his arm round Dudley's immense shoulders.
Severus's eyes glittered menacingly. "Like father like son," he commented icily.
"Anyway," Aemilia cut in before Severus could antagonise the Dursleys further, "a Portkey - a sort of transportation device - to Hogwarts will be provided for you on August the 13th so you may spend time with your counsel. However, as you are Muggles, the Wizengamot will choose your counsel for you." She glared at Vernon menacingly. "I would spend time reading up on wizarding laws, if I were you, Mr. Dursley," she said frostily. "You'll need it." And with a pop! she Disapparated, leaving Dudley and Petunia gaping and Vernon too stunned to speak.
Severus fixed Vernon with a glacial glare. "I trust you will find the hospitality of Hogwarts adequate, Mr. Dursley," he said, before he too Disapparated.
Remus found himself alone in the kitchen, with all three Dursleys staring at him and Harry standing mute by his side. "Harry," he said, "if you need anything - I know I'm not Sirius, but - don't hesitate to owl me," he said gently. "And don't you try to stop him," he threw over his shoulder to Vernon, "or Severus Snape will be paying you a far less cordial visit." An empty threat, Remus knew, but he doubted Vernon would call his bluff.
"Professor," he heard Harry ask tentatively, "can I - can I come back with you?"
"I'm afraid not, Harry," Remus replied. "Dumbledore has forbidden it for now - but I'm working on it and so is Molly Weasley." He drew the boy into another embrace. "Don't let the Muggles get you down," he whispered into Harry's ear.
He drew back, smiled at Harry, and then Disapparated, leaving behind him, he imagined, a very, very angry Vernon Dursley.
