I realized last night that I had blocked anonymous reviews. I had no idea I had them blocked, so I'm sorry if you wanted to review and were unable to. I unblocked them, so have at it! On to the chapter!
The Harvest Festival took place a few days after Karen and Jack's night at the vineyard. Cakes were passed out to the men of the town and whoever's had a coin would become next year's Harvest King. The ritual passed quickly and Gray won the title. Jack didn't so much mind. It was his first year in Flower Bud Village after all. What came next was very awkward for Jack. The couples' song was about to play and Jack didn't have a soul to ask. Cliff scooped up Ann before Jack had a chance to ask her. Jack's heart was set with Karen, though, so a dance with Ann would just be friendly. Jack found Karen across the mess of people to see her looking haggard. Kai had his arms around her, and by the look on her face, Jack could see that she was about fed up with him. The sight of her so uncomfortable made him sad, and he wished he could go invite her to dance. They'd had such a great connection that night with the fairies, but Karen didn't seem to notice. The music began playing and Kai dragged her onto the dance floor. She looked so unhappy. Why did she stay with him if she was so unhappy? They were dancing close, and Karen's head was lying on his shoulder. She still looked very sad. Jack began imagining what it would've been like if it was him and her dancing. They would've been the life of the party—laughing, smiling. Everyone would've radiated around them trying to capture their happiness. Jack came back to reality to see that Karen had caught his gaze. It looked almost like she had tears in her eyes, but she smiled anyway, and lifted a delicate hand to wave to him. Jack smiled, but couldn't manage a wave. His heart ached. Ever since he realized how much he really did care, it had been like this. He couldn't stand the thought of her with someone else and the fact that he might never have a chance to show her how much he loved her. He kept her gaze for a moment, and suddenly realizing how out of place and inconvenient he felt, he stood up and left the festival, with his head hung.
He walked through the empty town, the music of the festival still echoing off the buildings. He didn't know where to go. He didn't want to go home. He felt like a drink, but even the bar would be closed on a festival day. So he headed to the only place that he felt would comfort him.
The sounds of the festival even reached the beach. Each note in the music was like a hammer to his heart. How did he ever get himself into this situation? One day the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen walked onto his farm, and the next minute he was in love with her. It made no sense. He'd dated girls before, but none of them had the same effect over him. There was something—something almost indescribable about Karen. She seemed so raw. She wasn't afraid to speak her mind. The girls he'd dated in the city were concerned with money and charm. He'd never experienced a relationship with anyone who didn't care that he wasn't well off in either of those departments. While Karen wanted to keep to herself at first, he found that when she started talking about something she loved, she wouldn't stop talking. And there was that excited twinkle that played in her green eyes. Everything about her was genuine, nothing was counterfeit. If she loved something you could tell, and if she hated it, that was just as easy to see.
He wrapped his arms around his knees as he let the sea breeze carry his mind to the past. He remembered one past, hot summer afternoon; his father took him to the city to cheer him up. It was three days after the death of his mother. He and his father never talked much, really; it was always his mother that kept the bond between them. When she died, what she tried so long to hold together shattered. That afternoon in the city was when Jack realized that he and his father had never been close, and, while he cared, his father could never be there like his mother had been. Jack lost all faith in love when she died. He moved to the city, lived in a hole in the wall, and changed. For six months he wasted away in that slum of an apartment. Then another death hit him; his grandpa, whose farm he used to visit when he was young. Though he was deeply saddened by this, Jack took it as an opportunity. A fresh start. He could wipe the slate clean, forget his father and mother and the city. And three months from Grandpa's death, Jack had moved in to find a farm that didn't resemble his memories at all. There were rocks all over the place and dead tree stumps; sadness floated in the air. Upon seeing that, Jack had a new goal. He would bring the farm back to life. He couldn't bring his mother back, nor his Grandpa, but he could revive this farm. Through the back-breaking first season, Jack worked his fingers nearly to the bone.
Enter Karen.
He had no idea this would happen. He compared how empty he was at the beginning of the year and how fulfilled he felt now, a mere two seasons later. All because of a love that would remain nothing more than a friendship; a love that he couldn't even put into words. It was ironic that he was so happy to be around her, but at the same time it pierced his heart. He had to stop seeing her. He felt it was the only solution because the closer he got to her, the more it would hurt him. He knew she would eventually marry Kai. How would he feel when that happened? There would be no more visits at the beach. There would be no more drinking games at the bar. In passing he would have to inquire about how they were doing. He concluded it would be much better to just let her go now. Save him the trouble of hearing about the engagement from Karen's mouth. That beautiful mouth which always had a devilish grin on its lips. Oh, how he wished he could show her how much he loved her.
The sea wind blew his hat off his head, and he ran his fingers through the brown locks on his head. It was the first time in his life that he felt like he could cry. These thoughts of losing his mother and his Grandpa, and now being forced to give up on Karen, the first girl to make him feel real. He reached behind him, keeping his eyes facing the sinking sun, and picked up his hat. He went to put it back on.
"Leave it off," said a voice from behind him. It was Karen. Who else could it have been?
"Oh, but it's my lucky hat," said Jack with much sarcasm and little heart.
"Looks better off." She snatched it from his hands as she sat down beside him. He stifled a laugh but didn't smile. "Whatcha thinking about?"
"My crops," he lied.
There was a moment of silence. "You're a terrible liar." She handed his hat back to him.
"You have no idea." He took it, still not looking at her. He was afraid to face her, though he didn't know why.
"I feel like dancing," she said. "Wanna join me?"
He softly shook his head. The thought of dancing with her reminded him of the dance they did share. It was now or never. He had to let her go.
"Ah, you're no fun," she said, getting up and starting to dance by herself. Jack listened to her feet hitting the sand, and imagined her body gliding gracefully and her hair flowing out behind her.
"I can't do this anymore," he said. It was hard to find the words, but he managed this much. He heard her feet stop moving.
"Do what?" she asked, breathless.
Jack stood up, and looked at her. "This." He motioned to her, him, and the beach. Karen looked at him pretending she had no idea what he was talking about. "I just can't—" he began, but couldn't think of how to say it. "You—Kai—" He shook his head and put his hands up in front of him, like he was trying to stop something coming at him. Squinting, he said, "I just can't be a part of this anymore. It hurts too much."
He saw her face before he turned and left. It wasn't the face of someone who was stunned or confused. It was a look of loss. When he got home, he saw the picture of them tacked up on his calendar from that night with the fairies. He could never tear it up, no matter how much he felt like it. Instead, he tucked it into his night stand drawer, along with the mysterious letter from earlier that year. A small tear fell from his eye—the first one he'd let fall in his entire life.
I thought I should go ahead and update before I go out of town for the weekend. I have an audition for a theatrical arts summer thing. Blah. Anyhow, all the awesome reviews I got made me feel all "warm and gooshy" inside. Thanks a lot to every one of my reviewers! You all rock very, very much! I'm a busy little bird, but I'll try to check out some of your stories and tell you what I think! Thanks again! Only two more chapters!!! *tear* haha ^_^
