Disclaimers: The Dark Duo do NOT own Dragonball Z!!! We're just borrowing the characters for our story for a little while... ;) *wink*

The Dark Duo: Woohoo! Another chapter for all you great ppl out there! Isn't that nice? *sheepish grin* I guess it's been a while since we updated huh? Sorry about that, school (As well as many other things) have a lot to answer for, including the fact that we're both really lazy when it comes to updates! =) But enough about our whining, here's the next insane chapter of 'Bringing Down The House!!!' ^_^

Summary: The dawn of the first day! (Three days left until granny arrives!) Darkfire, Evrae (and the rest!) have the *ahem* delights, of trying to have a nice, normal Saturday while trying to tame the DBZ cast at the same time. What happens when Goku gets sick and Majin Buu, #17 and Vegeta decide to 'help out'? No really, what can possibly go wrong? =) (Warning!: Slight swearing in this chapter, mainly use of the f-word)

Chapter 3= 'Sick days, the call of the mall and the attack of the fat lady!' ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Saturday morning...

Evrae did not sleep well that night and Darkfire knew it. She supposed the older girl was justified though; there were eight psychos running loose in the house. Goku and Vegeta, Piccolo, Majin Buu, Android 17, Frieza, the psychotic Kitten and the demonic-looking Woran. All eight of them were quite scary when hyper and each looked more than capable of ultimate destruction. Darkfire was the only psycho in the house Evrae felt relatively safe around. Last night had been a doozy and already today looked up to be no better. After a restless night, Evrae rolled over and stared at the clock beside her bed. It was seven in the morning and she was not getting up this early, it was against taboo. Darkfire had a similiar night's sleep too, of various dreams such as Vegeta blowing the house up. And that dream with Buu eating the fish happened once or twice, or even worse, eating them popped up. More than once or twice. On top of that Frieza was here to stay too and she decided to try and keep Vegeta and the white lizard from ripping eachothers throats out. Darkfire didn't trust Evrae to do this and for good reason, she had the nasty feeling that Evrae would probably like to see something like that...

*Smash!* There goes a plate! Looks like somebody was up already destroying things. Judging from the shriek afterwards the culprit was most likely Android 17. Darkfire sighed and turned over, thinking it was best to get up and stop the madness before it got out of control. She crept into Evrae's room to try and wake her but gave up when the older girl buried her head under the pillow, a sure sign that she wasn't getting up anytime soon. Oh no! Darkfire wasn't putting up with this! "Evrae you idiot! You can't do this now! #17 and Buu are loose in the house!" Darkfire shook Evrae again but she was really out of it. "Wake up!" she hissed. Evrae turned over again and whined sleeply. "But I'm sleepy... five more minutes..." she murmured so Darkfire could barely hear her. The younger girl scowled and whispered in Evrae's ear... "Evrae, I set the house on fire!" she whispered. No response. "I killed Goku!" Nothing. Fine, she asked for it. It was time to bring out the big guns. "Ok...if you aren't gonna wake up I'm going to let Android 17 in here and break all your stuff!." Instantly Evrae's eyes shot open and she jumped out of bed. "Alright I'm up!" she yelled as she stumbled out of bed...

Together the two girls creeped downstairs slowly, taking care not to step on a sleeping Woran who was sprawled at the bottom of the stairs. As they approached they kitchen a loud screech resonated throughout the house, threatening to wake everyone up. Both girls stopped instantly when they heard another noise like a smashing object and somebody cursing. That sounded like Vegeta. They could hear more odd noises coming from the kitchen and they looked at each other in dispair, so far the kitchen had held nothing good for either of them. Taking a deep breath, Darkfire reached over and flung open the door, expecting the worst...

Vegeta was cooking...

That was beyond the worst...

He smiled at them as they walked in, insanity gleaming in his eyes. "Hiya girls! Sleep well?" he said brightly, unaware of the girl's frightened stares. He was high on something, and they knew it. Evrae walked forward to see what he was cooking. It was bacon, sizzling in the pan. Evrae gulped, hoping that wasn't the bacon she found in the soap last night. "Where are the others?" Darkfire asked suspiciously, wondering where they were. It was odd for the house to be so quiet, considering who was in it. Vegeta paused and pretended to think for a moment. "The Namek is floating somewhere, the Android is destroying your stuff, the lizard freak is hiding from you and that pink lump of goo is upstairs. As for the rest I think they are still asleep. Oh yeah and Kakarot is sick. Isn't that great?" he grinned spitefully. "Goku's sick?" said Evrae suspiciously, glaring at Vegeta accusingly. Vegeta smiled nastily and fished some bacon from the pan. "He's upstairs. Buu's reading him a story. Go and see if you don't believe me." And the saiyan prince chuckled darkly and swallowed the bacon. Evrae watched it go down and her spirits sank along with it...

So Darkfire did just what he said. She dragged Evrae along and they went upstairs into the parent's bedroom to see Goku all tucked up in bed. He looked very pale and had blood-shot eyes. Majin Buu was sitting on the edge of the large bed, trying to sound out the words in a kiddie's book which he was holding upside down, the kind for toddlers who were just learning how to read the ABC. *A/N: Those books are a joke, all you have to do to read them is look at the pictures*. "C-c..." Majin Buu stuttered. Goku sat up and looked what Buu was trying to read. "When 'c' and 'h' are together, they make a 'ch' sound, see?" "Yes," Buu said, nodding as he flipped the book up right. "...Chocolate..." ~What a cheater, he looked at the picture!~ thought Evrae angrily. She cleared her throat and Goku looked up, smiling weakly as he saw the two girls. "Hi Darkfire! Hi Evrae..." he grinned and coughed weakly. "Buu came up to keep me company, wasn't that nice of him?" he said as Buu smiled evily behind his back. ~Forget American psycho, think Japanese psycho!~ "Yeah, real nice..." Darkfire grumbled disbelivingly as she glared at Buu. "Don't you have anything better to do?" she said as Buu looked over at her. "No" he answered as he turned back to his book. "Why don't you go and check on Vegeta then, make sure he doesn't burn down the kitchen." suggested Evrae. Buu shrugged and trotted downstairs to watch Vegeta make food...

Darkfire turned to Goku..."So whats wrong with you then?" she asked as the super saiyan yawned and curled up. "I don't feel good. I'm tired and I feel sick..." he muttered. So Vegeta was telling the truth then! The sound of snoring filled the room, indicating that Goku was asleep. The two girls quietly left the room and sat down to think. "We got three missions to do today Darkfire, number 1: Get some food for everyone. I had a dream last night that Buu turned us into chocolate and we do NOT want that happening. Number 2: Tame the meaner DBZ people. That means Frieza, Android 17, Vegeta, Buu and probably Piccolo too, we don't want ANY fights breaking out here. Number three: Try and get everyone back home before granny comes over..." said Darkfire, breaking off at the thought of her friend's grandma. Evrae nodded, these were the things that needed doing the most... "Right then, you can get the shopping today then and I'll do it tomorrow, today I'll focus on fixing the portal and taming everyone so we don't have to worry about..." Darkfire said, pausing half-way as she smelt something coming from the kitchen...

"Do you... smell that?" she asked cautiously, worry seeping into her voice. Evrae frowned and sniffed, going pale as she realized what it was... "Holy shit! Something's burning!" she roared as she ran for the kitchen. "VEGETA!" Darkfire yelled as she dashed after Evrae and took the stairs two at a time, falling over the snoozing Woran and burst into the kitchen, freezing as black smoke smothered them. The smoke cleared and they saw the culprits trying in vain to put the fire out. "Holy Hell! They've set the kitchen on fire!" screamed Darkfire as she rushed forward to help out. Android 17, the fucking fool was sticking his hand in and out of the flames. Vegeta, at least, had a vague understanding that the blaze was beyond their control and was trying to put it out by throwing glasses of water on it. His efforts were futile - all he did was create more smoke. "What in hell are you doing?! Are you trying to kill us all!?" Evrae demanded, bright red with rage, Vegeta coughed angrily, probably from the mass amount of smoke he just breathed in. "It's not our fault! You left matches here for that pink freak to find!!" he screamed. Darkfire grabbed a kitchen towel and soaked it in the sink, pushed #17 out of the way (idiot) and hurled the wet towel over the flames, smothering them and putting an end to the fire, leaving Evrae with a scorched, black kitchen counter...

"You idiots!" she yelled as Vegeta and the deranged Android stepped back warily. "Go burn down your own fucking house!" #17 looked at her quizzically as he struggled to figure what he did wrong. "But then...where would we live?" asked Vegeta curiously, with an eyebrow raised. ~Fucking idiot porcupine head!~ thought Darkfire as Evrae struggled and failed to calm herself. "Tell you what, make yourself useful and get us some food, that shouldn't be too hard!" Darkfire said, trying to calm the hysterical Evrae and grabbing the frightened Android at the same time. She handed him some money and threw him out of the house along with a shocked Majin Buu. "Get some good food ok? And plenty of it!" she smiled brightly as she slammed the door on them. Whoot! Food problem solved, two of the DBZ psychos were out of the house plus she doomed some other poor suckers! Great morning! Darkfire did her classic victory jig as Evrae sighed tiredly and walked back to kitchen to find some breakfast... Twenty minutes later Woran, Kitten and Piccolo arrived downstairs, chatting casualy as they awaited their breakfast. "Morning all!" said Woran brightly, blissfully unaware of the scorched patches on the wall and the tired looks on the other girl's faces... Suddenly a pink blur whirled around the room, screeching with excitement as it dropped a ton of candy on everyone while a sheepish Android dumped a few eggs and some frozen meat onto the floor...

"Plenty food for everyone!" shouted Buu as he ran out of the room, with #17, Woran and Kitten following behind him. Everyone stared after them in disbelief... "Well... Lets eat everyone!" said Evrae, determined not to let this spoil her mood. She gathered the frozen bacon and eggs and wandered into the kitchen to cook. Nobody but Vegeta touched the candy. However good Buu's intentions might be it may have originally been some other poor people, but that little detail didn't stop Vegeta from stuffing his face. Ten minutes later, Evrae sighed tiredly and sat down to eat her eggs, watching everyone warily as she ate. Piccolo glared at everyone as he gulped his water, no surprises there. Woran walked back into the room, ruffling her long white hair sleepliy and sat down next the surly Namek. Kitten and Android 17 wandered in next, whispering together excitedly as though they knew a secret nobody else did. A flash of white that might have been Frieza appeared in the room for a moment but was gone as Darkfire walked in, carrying the last of the bacon and eggs. "Women, what an enigma, and such a nusience" muttered Vegeta darkly as he glared at her. Darkfire snorted and banged the bowl of scrambled eggs down in front of him. For a moment Evrae thought she was going to bang them down on his head.

After that devilish morning it was time for some real shopping. Darkfire checked the shopping list while Evrae gathered some money and rounded up everyone she could catch. "Ooooo-kay... So we have to get some PROPER food while we're out..." muttered Darkfire as Evrae grabbed the saiyan prince by his ear, who clearly did not want to go shopping with them. "And we have to get some more clothes. We don't really know how to wash them and we can't wear filth if grandma's coming over..." she said as Android 17 was hurled outside. "And we have to make sure no fights break out while we're gone!" she said turning to stare at Vegeta suspiciously. "What did I do to deserve this!? It's not fit for a true saiyan warrior to go about 'shopping' with little girls while Kakarot gets to lounge around! Somebody has to keep him on his toes!" he grumbled looking ever so much like a sulky child. "Torture him you mean, sorry Vegeta but it's safer for everyone if you come with us!" Darkfire said as Evrae struggled to catch Frieza, who was avoiding her like she was death itself...

"Oh stuff it! I can't play tag all day!" snarled Evrae as Frieza evaded her attack and vanished upstairs. "So we're taking everyone with us then?" asked Darkfire as if nothing had happened. "We can leave Frieza behind, remember he's been cursed so he can't do bad anything while we're away and Goku's can take care of himself..." said Evrae as she pulled out some car keys from a handbag. "What about Piccolo and Buu then? Green men and pink demons don't pop up at the supermarket everyday you know!" said Vegeta who had followed them around. "Oh... Piccolo can pretend to be an actor or something and I'll just hang Buu around my neck and pretend he's a necklace!" growled Evrae as she walked out the front door... "Here Buu! Walkies! Buu Buu Buu Buu Buu!" squealed Darkfire as Buu came bounding down the stairs after them. "See? He knows me already..." said Darkfire smugly as Evrae rolled her eyes and got Buu to shrink and hang around her neck...

The car they were to take was an old blue GTI (I forget the make). As soon as the Android saw it he started to argue. "Woah! Let me drive! Please please pleeeaaassseee???" whined the android as he danced around Darkfire, trying to snatch the car keys off her. "No #17! We know how you drive! Crashing into old ladies and over taking red lights and stuff!" she said as she threw the keys back to Evrae. "I think Kitten can drive today, I don't think I can trust myself right now..." she said quietly as she passed the keys over to the thrilled girl who opened the doors of the car and climbed into the drivers seat.
Android 17 jumped in next to her while Darkfire and Evrae (and Buu) sat at the back with a furious Vegeta squidged in between them. Piccolo and Woran squeezed in after them and Kitten started up the engine. It was a tight squeeze with eight people in one small car and it took a while before everyone was settled. "Alright, we're off!" screamed the driver as they sped down the road and off to the mall... Twenty minutes later they arrived at the mall. It was a strange sight to see four ruffled looking girls, one of which was holding a couple of swords, a tall green man, a short angry guy with tall hair and a crazed looking boy climb out of one tiny car. Then they formed into a small gang and stormed into the mall...

Call of the Mall!

"Okay, behave everyone, try to act normal" whispered Darkfire as the eight of them wandered into the mall, looking for food and clothes shops. Evrae wandered off to the food section wearing Majin Buu with Piccolo and Woran, who were both attracting many stares while Darkfire dragged Vegeta, #17 and Kitten along to the clothes part. Evrae wandered along the food aisle, picking up various food items that they needed. Buu suddenly reached out and grabbed some candy off the shelf right in front of a group of people who were startled to see the girl's 'necklace' stretch out and grab something off the shelf. "Buy me?" he asked, looking at Evrae with the puppy dogs eyes. "Yes yes, ok just stay still!" she whispered back, fully aware that the people who saw Buu were now talking quietly among themselves, pointing at Evrae's 'necklace'. "Don't worry people, it's just a trick..." she said, breaking off when he saw Piccolo opening a bottle of water that he'd taken off the shelf. "Don't do that, wait until we pay for it..." she hissed, taking the water off him. Piccolo looked surprised for a moment then scowled and snatched the water back, drinking it in front of her defiantly. Woran bit her lip, unsure of what to do. "Don't do that, we have to pay for it first!" she whipsered as she snatched the bottle back from the thirsty namek who was now giving her 'The Namek's eye'. He snatched it back and so they began a rather nervous looking tug of war in the middle of a shop with people staring. Suddenly the bottle popped open and soaked everyone within a ten metre radius. "Now why did you do that? Foolish human. You lost me my water!" growled the namekian warrior, pointing at the dripping wet girl with an accusing finger.

"But we had to buy it first! Look, can't you just get another water please? Don't make it more difficult then it already is..." Woran said quietly, picking up another bottle and placing it in the trolley. Piccolo sulked but did as his friend asked. Apart from that little incident everything went fine. Evrae managed to get the shopping done, Buu fell asleep and Piccolo and Woran talked to each other quietly, probably plotting something evil...

Meanwhile, Darkfire was having similar problems. #17 had hit Vegeta's head by accident and the raging saiyan prince chased the Android around the clothes store at top speed, whirling round and round, knocking all the clothes racks over, screaming and swearing in anger and attracting a whole lot of attention. Shocked parents were holding their children protectively, covering their ears and shouting about hoodlems while passing elderly grannies muttered something about "Kids these days..." "Stop! Just stop!" screamed Darkfire while Vegeta fired several ki shots at the fleeing android, just barely missing the poor girl. Kitten was roaring with laughter, throwing socks and shirts at Vegeta to protect the android and then a pink shirt landed in Vegeta's face. Well that did it. You might as well have lit a firework off in his face. As he saw the shirt he started to remember the pink 'badman' shirt that Bulma made him wear, which caused him to finally flip. He ripped up the shirt and flung the shreds around the store, screeching like a furious baboon and banged his chest with his fists...

"Vegeta! Just calm down! It was only an accident!" yelled Darkfire as Vegeta hooted and chased the android around some more. Darkfire just sighed and carried on picking up the clothes she liked. Eventually Vegeta calmed down, panting in fury and exaustion he wandered after the younger girl sheepishly and helped her carry the bags she had. Android 17 and Kitten followed after giggling silently with laughter... Apart from several odd looks they received when they left, everything went fine and dandy and they got everything they needed, including Goku's medicine. They met up with Evrae's party and waited at the checkout point. The last problem started when two little kids wearing Dragonball Z shirts came along and started to stare at Vegeta and Piccolo, which really irritated them. "What are you staring at you little punks?" Vegeta growled as one of the kids broke into a wide smile. "It's that Vegeta guy! Mommy come quick! It's Vegeta and Piccolo!" he yelled as a plump woman wandered by with her shopping. "Come now Bobby, they're only cartoon characters. They are not real and are not worth worrying about or talking about." Well that did it. Vegeta's infamous vein popped up as he let rip. "Excuse me lady but we ARE real because I, Prince Vegeta of all saiyans AM a saiyan and we won't have you contradicting us! So watch what you're saying Fatzilla because true warriors are worth worrying about!" he yelled as shocked passerbyes began to stare at him. "Vegeta, come on, don't do this now, you've been really really umm... good so far..." Darkfire muttered as she tried to pull the raging monkey away. Vegeta ignored her and he and the fat lady exchanged more insults. The children dropped their candy and begun to cry, attracting more stares from passerbys. "Wahhhh! I don't like Vegeta anymore! He's mean!" they screamed and by now everyone in the store was watching...

It might have ended badly but it was Buu who came to the rescue. Spotting the children's fallen candy he jumped from Evrae's neck and landed on the floor to scoop up the sugary goodness and then crammed the lot into his mouth. The fat lady screamed and screamed as she watched Buu stand up to his full height and fainted as he licked his lips and patted his slim tummy, totally ignoring the situation before him. "Buu feel better, we go home now?" he asked as the team walked out of the store without paying for anything. Nobody noticed a certain android slip bleach and pink colouring into his pocket...

"Well, you can't say that wasn't an interesting trip was it...?" said Darkfire to her friend as they got back. Buu grabbed the shopping and took it into the house, followed closely by Kitten and the android. Piccolo and Woran jumped out and grabbed the rest of the shopping. Vegeta jumped out and stretched, pausing when Evrae stepped in front of him. "Vegeta, why did you get all worked up about everything? Why couldn't you have just ignored everyone or just walked out and waited until we came back?" she asked. "I had to defend the pride of my people! 'Saiyans not real' Puh! I just gave her a piece of my mind! And that bloody android! He started it all so yell at him! Besides, you didn't have to pay for anything, that's how good I am!" he said as he galloped into the house, leaving Darkfire and Evrae to sigh and follow after him... Everything went calmly until that evening, when Vegeta decided to take a shower. After making up with #17, he picked up the shampoo bottle that the android had given him as a 'truce' and shampooed his hair thoughourly. Five minutes later a scream rocked throughout the house as the saiyan prince looked into the mirror, seeing that his hair had turned pink...

"ANDROID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GET YOUR ASS HERE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Well, the peace couldn't last forever could it?

End of chapter 3... ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* The Dark Duo: Strange but fun! ^_^ Once again, we're really sorry about the slow updates but we're finally in the writing spirit again! ^_^ And it's not too late to join in you know! Ideas and suggestions would be greatly appreciated while we're in the working mood. All you have to join is say your name, age, what you look like, when you want to join in and who you wanna hit on... I wonder who's gonna win the 'highest rated hottie' on here? So far it seems to be Android 17...

Thanks to: MiraiEvo, Jenny, Zithromax, Rowlingfan1, Lynseyax Heparedds, DRAGON FIRE (aka Brittnie!=) Raven151 and Woran for making this crazy story possible!!! We're putting everyone who hasn't been chosen in the next few chapters so please don't get too down hearted, you WILL get chosen eventually!

Tune in next chapter for more madness!