Disclaimer: Don't own it, don't sue me.
Note: The argument between Pippin and Grishnakh in this chapter actually happened to me, except it was over a wallet, not entrails. Guess which one I was! Lol. Also, see if you can spot the Monty Python reference. It's pretty damned obvious, so it should be easy. And PLEASE REVIEW!
"Excuse me, but would you please pass the entrails?"
"Very good! Why, yes, here you go!" Pippin passed Lugdush the pile of entrails they had found.
Grishnakh spoke up, "Gimmie the damned filthy entrails!"
Pippin looked him square in the eye, "Not until you use the magic word!"
Grishnakh snarled, "NOW!"
Ugluk elbowed Grishnakh and said through a mouthful of entrails, "Comon, just ask nicely!"
"GIVE IT TO ME NOW OR I'LL HIT YOU!"
Pippin countered, "Not until you ask me nicely!"
"GIVE IT TO ME OR I'LL KILL YOU!"
"NO!"
Grishnakh let out a scream of frustration and walloped Pippin in the face. Pippin throttled backwards and landed on top of Merry. Merry bolted awake.
After looking around confused, Merry said, "Hey, Pip, whatcha doin'?"
Pippin rubbed his face, he had a black eye, "Well hello sleeping beauty! I was just teaching these ingrates some manners!"
"Why?"
Pippin whispered in Merry's ear, "So they don't eat us!" Pippin cleared his throat, "My friends! This is Dr. Meriadoc and he shall be assisting me in assessing your character! He shall help me in explaining why you're such mean cruel tempered creatures!"
Lugdush raised his eyebrows, "He's a doctor?"
Pippin turns away, "Well, he's had a basic medical training."
"I'll tell you why we're like this! It's because we're Orcs!" exclaimed Ugluk.
Pippin gasped, "THAT'S RACIAL PROFILING! How dare you say such a thing! People should not be defined by their race!"
Merry giggled as he finally caught on, "Dr. Pippin, we sure have our work cut out for us!"
Another note: I know that the story is jumping around from teaching manners to psychology, but please bear with me. I'm making this up as I go, and have absolutely no plans for it until I sit down and write. I think (and hope) I have a way to tie it all together.
Note: The argument between Pippin and Grishnakh in this chapter actually happened to me, except it was over a wallet, not entrails. Guess which one I was! Lol. Also, see if you can spot the Monty Python reference. It's pretty damned obvious, so it should be easy. And PLEASE REVIEW!
"Excuse me, but would you please pass the entrails?"
"Very good! Why, yes, here you go!" Pippin passed Lugdush the pile of entrails they had found.
Grishnakh spoke up, "Gimmie the damned filthy entrails!"
Pippin looked him square in the eye, "Not until you use the magic word!"
Grishnakh snarled, "NOW!"
Ugluk elbowed Grishnakh and said through a mouthful of entrails, "Comon, just ask nicely!"
"GIVE IT TO ME NOW OR I'LL HIT YOU!"
Pippin countered, "Not until you ask me nicely!"
"GIVE IT TO ME OR I'LL KILL YOU!"
"NO!"
Grishnakh let out a scream of frustration and walloped Pippin in the face. Pippin throttled backwards and landed on top of Merry. Merry bolted awake.
After looking around confused, Merry said, "Hey, Pip, whatcha doin'?"
Pippin rubbed his face, he had a black eye, "Well hello sleeping beauty! I was just teaching these ingrates some manners!"
"Why?"
Pippin whispered in Merry's ear, "So they don't eat us!" Pippin cleared his throat, "My friends! This is Dr. Meriadoc and he shall be assisting me in assessing your character! He shall help me in explaining why you're such mean cruel tempered creatures!"
Lugdush raised his eyebrows, "He's a doctor?"
Pippin turns away, "Well, he's had a basic medical training."
"I'll tell you why we're like this! It's because we're Orcs!" exclaimed Ugluk.
Pippin gasped, "THAT'S RACIAL PROFILING! How dare you say such a thing! People should not be defined by their race!"
Merry giggled as he finally caught on, "Dr. Pippin, we sure have our work cut out for us!"
Another note: I know that the story is jumping around from teaching manners to psychology, but please bear with me. I'm making this up as I go, and have absolutely no plans for it until I sit down and write. I think (and hope) I have a way to tie it all together.
