Author's Notes: Just a reminder that you can find a link to my Yahoo group in my profile here at fanfiction.net. Feel free to jump in to discuss HP fanfic (mine, your own, or others), or just to listen to my ramblings.
Thank you to all of my readers and reviewers for inspiring me to continue! Hugs and love to all of you!
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.
*****
Chapter 30 ~ Don't Let Go
Saturday morning, Hermione had decided that there was not much more that she could do to help prepare for her mother's move. They had packed all but the essentials, and she knew that she could not bear another week away from Hogwarts... away from Severus. Remus would be arriving this afternoon, and she had made up her mind to go back to Hogwarts on Sunday, hoping that her mother and Remus would not mind her leaving them to have spend Easter alone.
That early spring morning was clear and bright. She took Samuel out to the back yard, to sit in the swing under her favorite tree for the last time. As the sun rose higher in the sky, she spread a blanket out on the grass and lay Samuel on it to enjoy the warmth of the rays of sunlight. She sat on the blanket next to him, smiling as she encouraged his attempts to roll over.
"Just a little bit further," she encouraged him, just as he place his fist under his chest and pushed hard. He had done it! She turned him over to his stomach, just to see if he could do it again. Again and again, Samuel propelled himself onto his back. Just as she was leaning in to praise him, a shadow fell over them and she heard an amused voice behind her.
"I see he has your knack for learning..."
Hermione whirled around, and found Severus standing only a few feet behind them, smiling at his son.
"Severus... what are you doing here?"
He frowned, "Is it a problem?"
"NO! No... not at all," she smiled in reassurance, "I just wasn't expecting you..."
"I couldn't stay away," he kneeled down to smile at his son, "and I'm glad I didn't... I wouldn't have wanted to miss this." He was not longer looking at Samuel... he was staring deeply into Hermione's eyes.
Looking back into his eyes, Hermione felt like she was being put into a trance. He had never looked at her quite like this before. Unsure of what that look meant, she forced herself to break away, smiling down at her son before looking back at Severus. "I'm glad you're here."
*****
Severus and Remus had apparated into an alley a few blocks away from the Granger home. When they arrived at the house a short while later, they were greeted by Elizabeth at the front door. Severus stood back as Remus stepped in to give Elizabeth a hug. He cleared his throat and Remus backed away, smiling as Elizabeth finally realized that the werewolf hadn't come alone.
"Severus! What a delightful surprise!"
Even more surprising to Severus was that she stepped forward to embrace him as if he were an old friend. Hesitantly, he reached one hand up to pat her shoulder in return.
"A pleasure to see you again, Elizabeth," his replied as his eyes darted around the foyer, "Where is..." he paused, not wanting it to seem to obvious that he was eager to see Hermione, "my son?"
Elizabeth smiled, "In the back yard. Hermione wanted to let him get some fresh air now that the weather is warming up." She showed him through the kitchen to the back door, and he walked outside alone, pausing as he closed the door behind him. His breath caught in his throat as he saw her there, basking in the sunlight with their son. The rays of sun created a halo effect around the crown of Hermione's head, revealing highlights of reddish gold in her hair, and her smile was radiant as she encouraged her son in his attempts to roll over. Slowly, he crept up behind them, just as Samuel finally pushed himself hard with his fist, propelling himself from his stomach to his back. Over and over again, he watched as Hermione would roll the child onto his stomach, only for Samuel to roll back over onto his back. He couldn't surpress a chuckle as he noticed the look on his son's face... his eyes dancing so much like Hermione's did every time she learned something new.
He finally spoke just as he was close enough to cast a shadow over them, and was taken aback for a moment at Hermione's reaction. Wasn't she happy to see him? Maybe it had been a mistake to come here.
As she reassured him with a smile, he kneeled down to smile at his son, "I wouldn't have wanted to miss this." Severus couldn't keep his eyes from locking with Hermione's as he spoke not only of his son, but of Hermione as well. He didn't want to miss another moment with her.
He watched as she lovingly glanced at Samuel, and his heart skipped a beat as she turned back to him and said, "I'm glad you're here."
Severus allowed himself to smile briefly before he stood and held his hand out to her, helping her to her feet. Their eyes met again for a moment before she asked, "Would you like to go inside? I should get Samuel down for a nap..."
He nodded, "May I...?" he asked as he stooped to scoop his child into his arms, Samuel cooing back at him in recognition.
Hermione smiled at them, "I'll show you where he's been sleeping."
They entered the kitchen to find Remus helping Elizabeth prepare a late lunch for the four of them. He didn't notice the way Elizabeth smiled knowingly in his direction as he followed Hermione out of the room as she led him upstairs. When they reached the top of the stairs, Hermione led him to the end of the hallway, where she opened the door to what must have been her own bedroom. Severus smirked as he realized that it was exactly what he would have expected of Hermione. Painted a pale yellow, it was feminine without being too girly. No frills and flowers, no ruffly lace bedding. There were rows and rows of bookshelves, now empty, flanking a window, and a simple oak bed with a patchwork quilt spread over it.
He stood near the bassinet, rocking back and forth on his feet with his son in his arms for a few minutes before Hermione came to stand by his side. She whispered, "He'll need fed before his nap."
"Of course..." he reluctantly handed Samuel to Hermione, before moving to help prop some pillows against the headboard so she could recline and relax as she nursed her son to sleep. There wasn't anywhere to sit besides the bed, and he began to feel awkward standing there. He was just about to make an excuse to leave the room when Hermione spoke quietly.
"Severus..." she patted the edge of the bed, "Why don't you have a seat?"
Hesitantly, he sat down, trying not to disturb them as he inched closer to reach over to his son, softly caressing his head. As he sat and watched, Hermione slowly began to drift off to sleep along with Samuel. After a few minutes of watching them sleeping together, he had to fight the urge to reach over and gather both of them into his arms. He eased himself off of the bed and gently covered both of them with a blanket, and even risked brushing a soft kiss to Hermione's temple before he turned to walk out of the room.
"Don't go..."
Severus whirled around to look at Hermione. She was looking back at him through partially closed eyelids, "Samuel missed you..." she whispered.
He slowly eased himself back on to the bed, lying down next to his son, opposite Hermione, and stayed there until she finally drifted off into a deep sleep.
*****
Hermione woke a short while later, looking around the room in confusion. Severus was gone... had it all been a dream? Her dreams had been so vivid lately that even the scent of him lingering in the air did not convince her that he had really been here not an hour ago.
She placed her sleeping son into the bassinet and quietly left the room, rubbing her hand wearily over her eyes as she made her way downstairs. She could hear voices in the kitchen, one of them very familiar... Remus! She smiled brilliantly as she entered the kitchen to greet him, halting in the doorway as she realized that Severus WAS there. None of it had been a dream. It dawned on her then... Remus had been there earlier when she and Severus had passed through the kitchen on their way upstairs, and she hadn't even greeted him.
"Remus!" she rushed forward and embraced him, "I'm sorry I didn't say hello before... I..."
"No worries, Hermione. You had a son to tend to."
"Did I sleep through lunch?" she asked as her cheeks flushed in embarassment.
Elizabeth laughed, "I think they may have saved you a sandwich," she replied, "I forgot what it was like to feed a grown man... let alone two of them!"
Remus laughed as Severus sat back and smirked. Hermione looked at him and realized that he looked more comfortable than she ever would have expected him to be in a Muggle home. "Severus," she asked as she poured herself some tea, "Are you staying the week, as well?"
He looked shocked at her question, "Er... no... I'd better get back tonight. I just wanted to take the opportunity to visit my son for the afternoon..."
"Oh..." Hermione tried to hide her disappointment. Then she remembered that she was thinking about leaving tomorrow, anyway.
"Mum, I was thinking of returning to Hogwarts tomorrow... I'd really like to get back to my studies."
Elizabeth smiled at her daughter, "My Hermione... always the bookworm," she laughed, "Go on, Hermione. Remus and I were just discussing the possibility of returning tomorrow, as well. For the holiday feast. We'll come back later in the week to move my belongings."
Hermione paused for a moment, "Oh... well then, maybe..."
"You'd rather go today?" Elizabeth smirked.
"Would you mind?"
"Not at all, Hermione... if Severus doesn't mind seeing you back safely," Elizabeth and Hermione both looked at Severus, who briefly nodded his head in affirmation.
"Whenever you are ready, Hermione."
*****
They spent a few hours visiting with Elizabeth before Severus and Hermione decided that they should get back to Hogwarts. Severus knew that Hermione was anxious to get Samuel back home and into his own bed. He helped her with her trunks, now full with the last of her childhood things. They would be leaving all but one of them behind, to be moved with the rest of Elizabeth's things. Using a shrinking charm, Severus was able to carry the remaining trunk under his arm. Hermione paused in the doorway of her bedroom, a sad smile on her face as her eyes misted over. Severus stood by her side, handing her a handkerchief as she turned to walk out of the room.
He walked behind her down the stairs, and stood in the foyer feeling helpless as she took one last look around... his eyes following her as she walked into the living room, pausing near the fireplace where she stopped to run her hand lovingly over the mantlepiece. She turned to meet her mother at the door, where they embraced and shed their final tears.
"It's time to let go, Hermione... remember what I told you... carry the memories in your heart."
Hermione sobbed as she nodded and turned away to dry her tears. Remus stepped forward and placed a hand on her shoulder, "We'll be seeing you tomorrow," he said softly as he pulled her into an embrace. He looked over her shoulder to Severus and mouthed, "Take care of her..."
Severus nodded abruptly, reaching forward to put his arm around her shoulder. As they reached the front door, he squeezed her shoulder gently before they walked outside. They paused as they reached the end of the sidewalk, where Hermione turned around to take one last look at the home that she was leaving behind. When he felt her shaking with sobs, he turned her around and pulled her into an embrace, allowing her to cry on his shoulder as he murmured soothingly, "Shhh... Everything will be alright."
He felt her nod against his chest before she raised her tearstained face to look up at him, "Take me home," she whispered.
They walked the short distance to the alley where he and Remus had apparated earlier, and disapparated back to the gates of Hogwarts. Walking in silence, they crossed the school grounds and entered the castle, heading straight to the dungeons when they arrived. When they reached her quarters, Severus set the trunk down and took Samuel from Hermione's arms, walking to the nursery and placing their sleeping child into his crib. He returned just a moment later, to find Hermione curled up on the sofa, drying the last of her tears.
Severus didn't know what to say as he crossed the room and kneeled down beside her. He reached up and tenderly brushed the hair away from her face. He paused as she looked up at him, her eyes red-rimmed and puffy, and was surprised when she reached to put her arms around him. Slowly, she leaned forward and brushed her lips to his. He could taste her tears.
"Severus..." she whispered in a hoarse voice, "hold me..."
Hesitantly, he tightened his arms around her as she laid her head against his chest, and he buried his face in her hair, inhaling her sweet scent before pulling her even closer. "Hermione..."
"Just hold me, Severus," she murmured.
"Shhh... Hermione..." he whispered, "If... If I hold you, I won't let go."
"Then don't..."
"Are you sure...?"
"Never let go..."
"Never!" he rasped as he scooped her into his arms and carried her to bed, where he laid by her side and held her through the night.
Thank you to all of my readers and reviewers for inspiring me to continue! Hugs and love to all of you!
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the characters from the books in the series are copyright JK Rowling, and are not being used for profit, only for personal enjoyment.
*****
Chapter 30 ~ Don't Let Go
Saturday morning, Hermione had decided that there was not much more that she could do to help prepare for her mother's move. They had packed all but the essentials, and she knew that she could not bear another week away from Hogwarts... away from Severus. Remus would be arriving this afternoon, and she had made up her mind to go back to Hogwarts on Sunday, hoping that her mother and Remus would not mind her leaving them to have spend Easter alone.
That early spring morning was clear and bright. She took Samuel out to the back yard, to sit in the swing under her favorite tree for the last time. As the sun rose higher in the sky, she spread a blanket out on the grass and lay Samuel on it to enjoy the warmth of the rays of sunlight. She sat on the blanket next to him, smiling as she encouraged his attempts to roll over.
"Just a little bit further," she encouraged him, just as he place his fist under his chest and pushed hard. He had done it! She turned him over to his stomach, just to see if he could do it again. Again and again, Samuel propelled himself onto his back. Just as she was leaning in to praise him, a shadow fell over them and she heard an amused voice behind her.
"I see he has your knack for learning..."
Hermione whirled around, and found Severus standing only a few feet behind them, smiling at his son.
"Severus... what are you doing here?"
He frowned, "Is it a problem?"
"NO! No... not at all," she smiled in reassurance, "I just wasn't expecting you..."
"I couldn't stay away," he kneeled down to smile at his son, "and I'm glad I didn't... I wouldn't have wanted to miss this." He was not longer looking at Samuel... he was staring deeply into Hermione's eyes.
Looking back into his eyes, Hermione felt like she was being put into a trance. He had never looked at her quite like this before. Unsure of what that look meant, she forced herself to break away, smiling down at her son before looking back at Severus. "I'm glad you're here."
*****
Severus and Remus had apparated into an alley a few blocks away from the Granger home. When they arrived at the house a short while later, they were greeted by Elizabeth at the front door. Severus stood back as Remus stepped in to give Elizabeth a hug. He cleared his throat and Remus backed away, smiling as Elizabeth finally realized that the werewolf hadn't come alone.
"Severus! What a delightful surprise!"
Even more surprising to Severus was that she stepped forward to embrace him as if he were an old friend. Hesitantly, he reached one hand up to pat her shoulder in return.
"A pleasure to see you again, Elizabeth," his replied as his eyes darted around the foyer, "Where is..." he paused, not wanting it to seem to obvious that he was eager to see Hermione, "my son?"
Elizabeth smiled, "In the back yard. Hermione wanted to let him get some fresh air now that the weather is warming up." She showed him through the kitchen to the back door, and he walked outside alone, pausing as he closed the door behind him. His breath caught in his throat as he saw her there, basking in the sunlight with their son. The rays of sun created a halo effect around the crown of Hermione's head, revealing highlights of reddish gold in her hair, and her smile was radiant as she encouraged her son in his attempts to roll over. Slowly, he crept up behind them, just as Samuel finally pushed himself hard with his fist, propelling himself from his stomach to his back. Over and over again, he watched as Hermione would roll the child onto his stomach, only for Samuel to roll back over onto his back. He couldn't surpress a chuckle as he noticed the look on his son's face... his eyes dancing so much like Hermione's did every time she learned something new.
He finally spoke just as he was close enough to cast a shadow over them, and was taken aback for a moment at Hermione's reaction. Wasn't she happy to see him? Maybe it had been a mistake to come here.
As she reassured him with a smile, he kneeled down to smile at his son, "I wouldn't have wanted to miss this." Severus couldn't keep his eyes from locking with Hermione's as he spoke not only of his son, but of Hermione as well. He didn't want to miss another moment with her.
He watched as she lovingly glanced at Samuel, and his heart skipped a beat as she turned back to him and said, "I'm glad you're here."
Severus allowed himself to smile briefly before he stood and held his hand out to her, helping her to her feet. Their eyes met again for a moment before she asked, "Would you like to go inside? I should get Samuel down for a nap..."
He nodded, "May I...?" he asked as he stooped to scoop his child into his arms, Samuel cooing back at him in recognition.
Hermione smiled at them, "I'll show you where he's been sleeping."
They entered the kitchen to find Remus helping Elizabeth prepare a late lunch for the four of them. He didn't notice the way Elizabeth smiled knowingly in his direction as he followed Hermione out of the room as she led him upstairs. When they reached the top of the stairs, Hermione led him to the end of the hallway, where she opened the door to what must have been her own bedroom. Severus smirked as he realized that it was exactly what he would have expected of Hermione. Painted a pale yellow, it was feminine without being too girly. No frills and flowers, no ruffly lace bedding. There were rows and rows of bookshelves, now empty, flanking a window, and a simple oak bed with a patchwork quilt spread over it.
He stood near the bassinet, rocking back and forth on his feet with his son in his arms for a few minutes before Hermione came to stand by his side. She whispered, "He'll need fed before his nap."
"Of course..." he reluctantly handed Samuel to Hermione, before moving to help prop some pillows against the headboard so she could recline and relax as she nursed her son to sleep. There wasn't anywhere to sit besides the bed, and he began to feel awkward standing there. He was just about to make an excuse to leave the room when Hermione spoke quietly.
"Severus..." she patted the edge of the bed, "Why don't you have a seat?"
Hesitantly, he sat down, trying not to disturb them as he inched closer to reach over to his son, softly caressing his head. As he sat and watched, Hermione slowly began to drift off to sleep along with Samuel. After a few minutes of watching them sleeping together, he had to fight the urge to reach over and gather both of them into his arms. He eased himself off of the bed and gently covered both of them with a blanket, and even risked brushing a soft kiss to Hermione's temple before he turned to walk out of the room.
"Don't go..."
Severus whirled around to look at Hermione. She was looking back at him through partially closed eyelids, "Samuel missed you..." she whispered.
He slowly eased himself back on to the bed, lying down next to his son, opposite Hermione, and stayed there until she finally drifted off into a deep sleep.
*****
Hermione woke a short while later, looking around the room in confusion. Severus was gone... had it all been a dream? Her dreams had been so vivid lately that even the scent of him lingering in the air did not convince her that he had really been here not an hour ago.
She placed her sleeping son into the bassinet and quietly left the room, rubbing her hand wearily over her eyes as she made her way downstairs. She could hear voices in the kitchen, one of them very familiar... Remus! She smiled brilliantly as she entered the kitchen to greet him, halting in the doorway as she realized that Severus WAS there. None of it had been a dream. It dawned on her then... Remus had been there earlier when she and Severus had passed through the kitchen on their way upstairs, and she hadn't even greeted him.
"Remus!" she rushed forward and embraced him, "I'm sorry I didn't say hello before... I..."
"No worries, Hermione. You had a son to tend to."
"Did I sleep through lunch?" she asked as her cheeks flushed in embarassment.
Elizabeth laughed, "I think they may have saved you a sandwich," she replied, "I forgot what it was like to feed a grown man... let alone two of them!"
Remus laughed as Severus sat back and smirked. Hermione looked at him and realized that he looked more comfortable than she ever would have expected him to be in a Muggle home. "Severus," she asked as she poured herself some tea, "Are you staying the week, as well?"
He looked shocked at her question, "Er... no... I'd better get back tonight. I just wanted to take the opportunity to visit my son for the afternoon..."
"Oh..." Hermione tried to hide her disappointment. Then she remembered that she was thinking about leaving tomorrow, anyway.
"Mum, I was thinking of returning to Hogwarts tomorrow... I'd really like to get back to my studies."
Elizabeth smiled at her daughter, "My Hermione... always the bookworm," she laughed, "Go on, Hermione. Remus and I were just discussing the possibility of returning tomorrow, as well. For the holiday feast. We'll come back later in the week to move my belongings."
Hermione paused for a moment, "Oh... well then, maybe..."
"You'd rather go today?" Elizabeth smirked.
"Would you mind?"
"Not at all, Hermione... if Severus doesn't mind seeing you back safely," Elizabeth and Hermione both looked at Severus, who briefly nodded his head in affirmation.
"Whenever you are ready, Hermione."
*****
They spent a few hours visiting with Elizabeth before Severus and Hermione decided that they should get back to Hogwarts. Severus knew that Hermione was anxious to get Samuel back home and into his own bed. He helped her with her trunks, now full with the last of her childhood things. They would be leaving all but one of them behind, to be moved with the rest of Elizabeth's things. Using a shrinking charm, Severus was able to carry the remaining trunk under his arm. Hermione paused in the doorway of her bedroom, a sad smile on her face as her eyes misted over. Severus stood by her side, handing her a handkerchief as she turned to walk out of the room.
He walked behind her down the stairs, and stood in the foyer feeling helpless as she took one last look around... his eyes following her as she walked into the living room, pausing near the fireplace where she stopped to run her hand lovingly over the mantlepiece. She turned to meet her mother at the door, where they embraced and shed their final tears.
"It's time to let go, Hermione... remember what I told you... carry the memories in your heart."
Hermione sobbed as she nodded and turned away to dry her tears. Remus stepped forward and placed a hand on her shoulder, "We'll be seeing you tomorrow," he said softly as he pulled her into an embrace. He looked over her shoulder to Severus and mouthed, "Take care of her..."
Severus nodded abruptly, reaching forward to put his arm around her shoulder. As they reached the front door, he squeezed her shoulder gently before they walked outside. They paused as they reached the end of the sidewalk, where Hermione turned around to take one last look at the home that she was leaving behind. When he felt her shaking with sobs, he turned her around and pulled her into an embrace, allowing her to cry on his shoulder as he murmured soothingly, "Shhh... Everything will be alright."
He felt her nod against his chest before she raised her tearstained face to look up at him, "Take me home," she whispered.
They walked the short distance to the alley where he and Remus had apparated earlier, and disapparated back to the gates of Hogwarts. Walking in silence, they crossed the school grounds and entered the castle, heading straight to the dungeons when they arrived. When they reached her quarters, Severus set the trunk down and took Samuel from Hermione's arms, walking to the nursery and placing their sleeping child into his crib. He returned just a moment later, to find Hermione curled up on the sofa, drying the last of her tears.
Severus didn't know what to say as he crossed the room and kneeled down beside her. He reached up and tenderly brushed the hair away from her face. He paused as she looked up at him, her eyes red-rimmed and puffy, and was surprised when she reached to put her arms around him. Slowly, she leaned forward and brushed her lips to his. He could taste her tears.
"Severus..." she whispered in a hoarse voice, "hold me..."
Hesitantly, he tightened his arms around her as she laid her head against his chest, and he buried his face in her hair, inhaling her sweet scent before pulling her even closer. "Hermione..."
"Just hold me, Severus," she murmured.
"Shhh... Hermione..." he whispered, "If... If I hold you, I won't let go."
"Then don't..."
"Are you sure...?"
"Never let go..."
"Never!" he rasped as he scooped her into his arms and carried her to bed, where he laid by her side and held her through the night.
