"After all these images of pain, have cut right thru you,
I will kiss every scar, and weep you are not alone..."

~~~~~~Shigure~~~~~

I walked upstairs, ready to tease Yuki for being alone with Tohru in her room. For whatever reason, Kyou was following me. He said it was because he had to ask them a question. I prodded him for more, and he exploded into a fit of "none your business!" and "stupid dog!". I giggled, knowing full well he just wanted to make sure Yuki hadn't honed in on his woman. I poked my head in the door way to Tohru's room, and nearly fell over. I felt Kyou bump into me, "what're you doing yo-" he cut off.

The first thing I saw was a vivid lake of burgundy, and the body in it. Haru was clinging to Yuki and weeping uncontrollably.

I speculated Haru would come to think Tohru tore him and Yuki apart.

I presumed he'd be angry.

I prayed this wouldn't happen.

It happened, and I knew why, because it had happened before.

I knew, and no one knew I remembered.

~~~~~~Kyou~~~~~

That rat and cow had killed her. Yuki and Haru did it. Out of spite to make me miserable? Would he go that far? No, it was pure jealousy. Yuki murdered Tohru out of jealousy. Haru had probably been tricked into helping. After all, the idiot would do anything for Yuki.

I had clapped my hand over my mouth and staggered back at first, now I just wanted to tear them apart. I flew at them, not really sure who I was going to get, I just wanted to hurt them both. They hurt the person who understood me, the first to care, probably the only.

I shot into the room, screaming "you bastard!"

My fist smashed into Yuki's face, the only solid punch I had ever laid upon his perfectly flawed face. He fell back, and stared up at me. I saw it in his haunted eyes then, he hadn't killed Tohru. I turned my head to Haru, who's looked mortified and disbelieving. Maybe I misjudged… maybe they too had come to the scene. My knees went out then, and I felt tears well, no one had seen me cry ever, and I wasn't about to start now. I bolted to the roof.

~~~~~~Yuki~~~~~

When Kyou bolted I knew he believed Haru had done it. I just prayed he hadn't run to the police. I looked to Shigure, his face painted in grief, his shock had passed too quickly I thought. I hoped for him to just tell me what to do, not make me ask, but it appeared that wasn't going to happen.

I tried to speak, and my voice failed. The second time I managed to shakily croak out Shigure's name. He looked up at me and read my emotions.

"Yuki… get Haru out of here and cleaned up. You too," was all he said. I needed to know what was going to happen, would Haru be locked up? Killed? Would they tell Akito? "Of course they would" I thought, and that terrified me more than the police. The law was humane.

I stood up, my face aching a little from the punch, an inevitable bruise would form. I gently tugged on Haru's sleeve, and when he didn't stand, I wrapped my arm around him, and pulled him up. He stood unsteadily, leaning on me. He no longer cried, just stared blankly. It made my skin crawl and chilled me to the soul to see his face like that. He normally looked unemotional, but a strong look had always been there. Now he just looked dead.

"Come on Haru… let's get out of here and clean up," the words were sickeningly normal, like we had been outside playing a game and had become grimy.

Haru simply nodded and let me lead him out of the room. I hadn't notice but Shigure had pulled a sheet off the bed and was covering the bloody mess behind us. I walked Haru into the bathroom; he sat himself on the closed toilet. I left to Kyou's room, as not a stitch of clothes that I owned would fit Haru. I returned and set the clothes down for him, then disappeared to my room, to dispose of the shirt I could never bring myself to wear ever again.

I caught my face in a mirror, and I automatically thought "stupid cat" when I noticed a bit of my face turning color. I noticed my eyes were wet and red. Tohru was dead, but I was more concerned with Haru. I was terrified to lose him again. This had happened because I lost him. I would fight to whatever end to keep him now, I wouldn't let anyone tear us apart now. I would run away with him to the ends of the earth if need be.

I moved myself back to the bathroom and Haru was just standing there. He had managed to change his pants, but the bloody shirt remained. His eyes masked in his right hand. I knew he wasn't functioning right now, and I couldn't blame him.

"Haru, we need to clean you up ok? We probably are going to have to go see some people and you don't want to have…." I paused, not wanting to use any word to trigger right now, "you don't want to look like that."

He nodded and pulled his shirt off, chucking it in the garbage. His eyes looked around, then to me, "got a washcloth?"

I reached under the sink pulling one out, wet it and handed it to him. He sat down on the edge of the tub and scrubbed at himself, then stopped. "Yuki…. I'm sorry… I know that's worthless now, but I am. I deserve to die."

My heart skipped a beat. I sat next to him, and hugged him tight, "no… this isn't your fault. I was stupid to leave you."

I stopped myself last minute from mentioning it hadn't even been for Tohru, but to add insult to injury by telling him that? Unpleasant image.

Shigure poked his head into the room. He looked at the floor and spoke in a tone contrary to his normal light attitude. "Boys, I called Hatori. He's coming to... to clean up, and then take you to talk to Akito."

"Akito? No," I whispered out loud to myself. I jumped up and tore out of the bathroom nearly tripping, my legs feeling weak. I ran in front of Shigure and grabbed the front of his robes.

"Akito?! Are you insane? He'll kill Haru!" I yelped, frantic to protect.

Shigure glared at me and jerked his head to the bathroom, and said in a hushed voice, "shush. You don't want Haru hearing that. He must go, you know this. I won't let him go in alone."

"But you're loyal to Akito, you've never intervened with him," my defiance to Shigure's authority rose.

"You'd be amazed Yuki-kun, of the things you don't know. And I beg your pardon but that visit between Akito and Tohru didn't I…." he trailed off, shutting his eyes briefly then looking back at me. He clapped his hands on my shoulders, "I promise nothing will happen to Haru, in fact, you will go in there with him. I know it's hard for you, but you and Haru will get through this."

I stared up at him, and was thankful. I trusted him, part of me wanted to collapse and cry, let my older, almost father-like cousin take care of me. No time for that though, I had to take care of Haru. I nodded, and pulled away, heading back to the bathroom to aid the one most in need.

~~~~~~Haru~~~~~

I scrubbed at myself, barely aware of what I was doing. I avoided thought, it would betray me. Shigure appeared in the doorway, his voice sounded distant to me. He said something of Hatori and cleaning up. I paid no mind to it. The words that caught me were that we were visiting Akito. A sense of doom filled me, but subsided. I would get all that I deserve, and not a drop more. I deserved the worse than anything Akito could deal to me. I had murdered someone, massacred. Yuki assured me it wasn't my fault, that it'd all be ok. It made me feel sicker. His touch was something I didn't deserve, and I poisoned him. Yuki ran out of the room, most likely to speak with Shigure.

I sat there alone, scrubbing at myself. My flesh was raw and red from the scrubbing, though the red was most likely bloodstain. I set the pink tinted rag aside, and pulled on the black t-shirt Yuki had brought me.

Yuki returned to the room, he offered me his hand, "Come on, we've got to go see Akito. I won't let him hurt you."

I ignored his hand and stood up, tucking my hands in my pockets. "Let's go."

We walked outside, where Hatori's car was. He wasn't in the vehicle. He was most likely still cleaning up. I sat myself in the front, so Yuki wouldn't have to sit by me. I stole a glance back at him, he looked hurt. I didn't want to, but he needed to see I was no good, I wasn't worth his stress. And who knows, in a short time I may be dead or imprisoned for life.  Hatori and Shigure finally came to the car. Yuki looked to them as they got in the car. Hatori looked sick.

He looked at me, and sighed, "Haru, I told you not to believe everything you hear from Akito-san."

"Hatori! Leave him alone," Yuki snapped, "it's not like he hasn't realized he made a mistake. It's not necessary for you to-"

I cut him off, "It's ok Yuki."

A deep sigh was heard. I looked back, Yuki watched me with an expression I couldn't read. Shigure wouldn't look at me. He hadn't met his eyes with mine once yet. Maybe he never would.

The car ride to the Main House was never so long. The silence was a knife shearing our ears. We got there, and Hatori led me back to his room. I halted when I heard light footsteps behind us. I turned around, there was Yuki, treading down the hall more determined than he had ever been walking this path.

"Yuki, you're not going in there, you are not getting hurt on account of my stupidity," I told him, my words firm.

He stared straight into my eyes with a piercing gaze showing he wasn't about to let me go that easy, "no."

"Yuki, I mean it. I do not want you in there,"

He shook his head and took a step forward. I held out my hand and put it on his shoulder, "Yuki, go away."

I saw his Adam's apple jerk and could near see his mind recoil through his window-like eyes. I had never in my life told Yuki to go away. He turned around, and abandoned me, like I had ordered. I glanced to Hatori. His thoughts were a mystery to me. I was surprised how well Hatori and Shigure held together, and how fast their shock had worn off. It's almost as though they had expected it. Grief did weird things though, maybe it hadn't sunk in yet. We finished the walk to Akito's room and I let myself in. Akito wasn't lounging about as usual, he was sitting, waiting. He looked up, his ice eyes not as frightening as usual.

"Sit down, Hatsuharu."

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Things are winding down, but the clean up after the hurricane isn't always the nicest thing ever. R&R!