*the next day

Kaiba's back is sore from sleeping on his coat spread out on the ground in the forest, and he is very cold and hungry. It takes him a lot of effort to get up and look around. All he can see are trees, trees, and more trees

Mai is nowhere to be seen from Kaiba's point of view. She found a small river with some soft grass nearby and spread out a blanket there on which she spent the night. Because she brought matches with her, Mai made a fire that was burning all night. She starts the fire going again and takes out a pot from her pack, in which she will make coffee for herself. She also takes out a sandwich left over from what she was supposed to have for lunch on the plane, (since everyone with the tiniest amount of brain knows that airplane food sucks,) and starts eating*

KAIBA: *thinking to himself* Now I'll just go back to the Spire and tell the stupid guard to let me use his telephone. I'll call Mokuba and tell him there has been a change in plans and that I will need the jet to come for me sooner, as in today. The jet will come, I'll go on, and be back in Domino City before you can say "no big deal". So now where's the exit to this forest again? Wait, forests don't have exits, do they? My mistake, where's the nearest clearing? *starts walking around looking for and exit. Ten minutes later, Kaiba is still wandering around, and he begins cursing. His stomach growls and he looks around. There is a bush nearby with red berries. Kaiba reaches for one then changes his mind* There's no telling if they're poisonous or not and I never did like berries much anyway. *continues walking*

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MAI: *finishes with her sandwich and coffee and starts packing her things up when she sees Kaiba, wandering around like a lost child* Should I go up to him? He looks weary . . . . and surprisingly meek, totally unlike the arrogant Kaiba I know. Nah, let him find his own way back, I though he had a private jet. What's he doing here anyway?

KAIBA: *sees Mai putting a blanket into her pack. Without thinking he walks over to her, and waits for her to look up*

MAI: *gets up and sees Kaiba standing over her* What do you want?

KAIBA: Uh. . . . nothing. *cheeks turn slightly red and he begins to walk away when he smells Mai's coffee. Kaiba stops*

MAI: *sees Kaiba looking and takes out a cup from her pack* You want some? *gestures to the cup then to the coffee and back to the cup*

KAIBA: No. I don't need your hospitality or your pity.

MAI: Like I would pity you. I'm just trying to help, but if you don't want any then fine, suit yourself. I couldn't care less. *takes the coffee pot and prepares to dump the leftover into the grass*

KAIBA: *tries hard to resist, but his hunger and thirst overcome his pride* Wait! I mean. . . . wasting food is bad. If you're not going to drink the rest, I will.

MAI: *amused, she stops and pours the coffee into the cup* Whatever. Make all the excuses you want, you weren't able to contact your private jet, were you?

KAIBA: *opens his mouth to make a nasty retort, but Mai pushes the cup of coffee into his hands and the smell overpowers him. Kaiba starts drinking, the coffee is lukewarm, but still tastes good to him. He drains the cup and hands it back to Mai*

MAI: So, aren't you going to thank me?

KAIBA: *grunts and mutters to himself*

MAI: *laughs* I didn't expect you to. Go rinse the cup out in the river, and if you're still thirsty, drink some water from there as well.

KAIBA: *angrily* WHAT! No way, I will NOT drink water from a dirty river.

MAI: Fine, I couldn't care less if you dehydrate, and I'm definitely NOT sharing my water with you. You only got the coffee because I wasn't going to drink the rest. *takes her pack and starts walking away*

KAIBA: *even though he's not as thirsty anymore, he is still VERY hungry* Stop!

MAI: What, are you going to start ordering me around now? I'm not one of your brainless employees who'll follow your every command. Just for your information, that was MY cup that you just drank MY coffee out of.

KAIBA: Stop rubbing it in. . . . I was thirsty. Now give me some food, May.

MAI: Ahem, did I just hear you demand me to give you food? Maybe there was a possibility I'd give you a few crumbs, if you had asked nicely. . . . . and it's MAI not May. Sheesh, you'd think he'd have learned some manners by now, but NO. He just HAS to be as polite as a monkey.

KAIBA: For YOUR information, monkeys are polite, but I'm NOT a monkey.

MAI: Have you ever seen a monkey? I don't think so, but you are right about one thing. You're not a monkey, you're a PIG! *starts laughing wildly*

KAIBA: *gets VERY mad and loses his temper. He raises his hand to slap Mai* MAI: *stops laughing and takes Kaiba's hand and twists it behind his back with surprising force, and coos into Kaiba's ear* Did Mr. Kaiba just lose his temper? Ah, naughty boy, he should be punished.

KAIBA: *struggles to free his hand* Let me go you idiot! *mutters to himself* Beaten by a girl, how embarrassing is that?

MAI: I'm not as big an idiot as you, Seto Kaiba. At least I had the brain to prepare myself for anything, and had the sense to bring provisions along. And are you hinting that women are inferior to men? For your information, they're not. *twists Kaiba's hand harder before she let go and kicks his shin, hard*

KAIBA: So I left my cell at home. I didn't know that we were being tricked. *shakes out his hand and leg then winces* Where'd you learn how to kick so hard? You probably broke a bone.

MAI: Did not stupid, I just bruised it. I took tae kwon doe when I was younger. It really paid off, didn't it?

KAIBA: *grumbles, and unable to take it anymore, he walks off leaving Mai just standing there*

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So this concludes the second chapter. The more reviews I get, the sooner I'll write. And I also need to figure out how to make Kaiba and Mai start traveling together.

Author's note: I KNOW that this fanfic is very unreasonable and unrealistic and is very unlikely to ever happen. But I still find it fun to make Kaiba look like an idiot. (My sincerest apologies to all Kaiba fans out there.)