*Mai and Kaiba have been traveling all day. They have eaten nothing since
their duel. Right now the sun is just about to set behind them. Mai and
Kaiba have made camp on grassy part of the forest, where Mai is now
stirring something in a pot over a small fire*
KAIBA: Please hurry it up, Mai. I'm very hungry.
MAI: *gets mad and starts yelling at Kaiba:* It was your idea to "scrimp", as you put it, and seeing as how you refused to cook, I'm going to take all the time I want!
KAIBA: Well, it's not my fault I can't cook, and that probably I'd burn the food.
MAI: *rolls eyes* It's stew, you idiot. I asked you to cook stew. All you have to do is get some water, dump in some vegetables and meat, put it over a fire, and stir occasionally. How hard is that?
KAIBA: Not very.
MAI: Obviously, but I guess you're too stupid even to put some things into a pot.
KAIBA: I mean it's not very hard to do what you just described. But you make it sound more effortless than it really is.
MAI: *rolls eyes* Whatever. *continues stirring stew for a while longer, then gets out two bowls and two spoons, into which she ladles out some stew from the pot*
KAIBA: *takes some stew in his spoon and puts it in his mouth* AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! *starts panting* Water. I NEED WATER!
MAI: You do know you're supposed to let hot things cool first before consuming? Well obviously not. . . .go get some water from the stream there.
KAIBA: NO! I DUELED YOU AND I BEAT YOU FAIR AND SQUARE! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO GIVE ME YOUR WATER NOW!
MAI: Sorry to disappoint you Kaiba, but we dueled for food. You never mentioned water.
KAIBA: *still panting* I SAID "PROVISIONS"!
MAI: *laughs* And I though you meant food. You want water, go get it from the river. Go on.
KAIBA: YOU! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!
MAI: Might want to get some water first. *laughs again*
KAIBA: *is about to hurt Mai, but stops and winces when he remembers what happened last time. Feeling very conscious, he rubs his shin*
MAI: So, aren't you going to get water?
KAIBA: *coughs a bit then tries acting relaxed* It's nothing I can't handle. *tries acting more composed* You just go and worry about yourself. *spoons some soup more cautiously into his mouth and grimaces*
MAI: *ignores Kaiba and concentrates on her own soup, pretending he no longer exists*
KAIBA: *after a few more mouthfuls, on the third mouthful he spits out his soup* YOU CALL THIS STUFF FOOD!?! IT TASTES MORE LIKE ROTTEN BANANAS FROM A LANDFILL!
MAI: *coolly:* And how would you know what rotten bananas from landfills taste like? Have you ever tried one? No, don't even bother answering that, you idiot, because bananas are biodegradable and would therefore decompose! There probably aren't that many rotten bananas in landfills, let alone fresh ones.
KAIBA: Shut up! Your cooking is fit for a bunch of nasty pigs!
MAI: Oh? Then it must be fit for you.
KAIBA: WATCH YOUR MOUTH! OR ELSE. . . . . . or else. . . . um. . . . uh. . . . .
MAI: Or else what? You better not insult my cooking anymore Seto Kaiba! It's all your gonna get from me, not counting a good and sound beating if you don't shut your trap soon and at least pretend for a while that someone had taught you manners, meaning GOOD manners, sometime in your life.
KAIBA: How do you eat this stuff?
MAI: Out here in the wild, the only person I can rely on is myself. I don't trust anybody else.
KAIBA: I asked you a simple question. Is it too hard for you to give a straight answer?
MAI: Want me to punch you? Or should I kick you again? Take your pick.
KAIBA: Can you even boil water properly?
MAI: My question only had two answers: punch, or kick. Are you so much of an idiot that you can't even answer that question?
KAIBA: Do you even know the difference between vegetables and fruits? I could swear you put in some pumpkin in there.
MAI: Yes or no question Kaiba. You've just proved I was very much mistaken, you're not a dumbo, you're not a stupid freak, you're not even an idiot. YOU'RE A MORON! No wait, scratch that, even morons have more brains than you because at least even they can answer "yes or no" questions. I know. . . . .you're an IDIOTIC MORON! *laughs to herself* I am sooooo good!
KAIBA: You fool, what are you ranting on about now?
*a rustle comes from a bush behind Kaiba. Mai abruptly stops laughing and gasps in shock as a person wearing a black mask and the costume of a ninja creeps up behind Kaiba. The person has a long butcher knife in one hand and a large club in the other*
MAI: KAIBA! Watch out, behind you!
KAIBA: What was that fool? I couldn't decipher your stuttering speech. You should really see a speech therapist. *cups his hand around his ear* Please excuse me, but could you repeat that?
MAI: KAIBA! THIS IS NO TIME FOR JOKES OR LAME INSULTS! YOU KNOW VERY WELL THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH MY SPEECH, BUT THERE WILL BE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOUR HEAD IF YOU DON'T TURN AROUND SOON! My mistake there's already something wrong with your head, but. . . . . . . .
KAIBA: *has not yet turned around and is looking at Mai, trying to think of another insult*
*the ninja is getting closer to Kaiba. He raises his club and prepares to deal a shattering blow to Kaiba's head*
MAI: KAIBA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*the club comes down with an eerie whistle*
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
So what will happen next? Will Kaiba turn around and duck, saving himself just (barely) in time? Or will the club make contact with his head and injure his brain (maybe even paralyze some parts of his body) for life? Or worse, will Kaiba die? And who is this mysterious person dressed like a ninja? Why does he want to kill Kaiba in the first place? Does this have anything to do with the (false) tournament Kaiba and Mai were invited to?
Um, this concludes the fourth chapter. Please R&R and uh I'll write more later. See, I kind of have a minor case of writer's block right now. . . . and yeah. I'll write more as soon as I figure out what's going to happen next.
KAIBA: Please hurry it up, Mai. I'm very hungry.
MAI: *gets mad and starts yelling at Kaiba:* It was your idea to "scrimp", as you put it, and seeing as how you refused to cook, I'm going to take all the time I want!
KAIBA: Well, it's not my fault I can't cook, and that probably I'd burn the food.
MAI: *rolls eyes* It's stew, you idiot. I asked you to cook stew. All you have to do is get some water, dump in some vegetables and meat, put it over a fire, and stir occasionally. How hard is that?
KAIBA: Not very.
MAI: Obviously, but I guess you're too stupid even to put some things into a pot.
KAIBA: I mean it's not very hard to do what you just described. But you make it sound more effortless than it really is.
MAI: *rolls eyes* Whatever. *continues stirring stew for a while longer, then gets out two bowls and two spoons, into which she ladles out some stew from the pot*
KAIBA: *takes some stew in his spoon and puts it in his mouth* AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! *starts panting* Water. I NEED WATER!
MAI: You do know you're supposed to let hot things cool first before consuming? Well obviously not. . . .go get some water from the stream there.
KAIBA: NO! I DUELED YOU AND I BEAT YOU FAIR AND SQUARE! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO GIVE ME YOUR WATER NOW!
MAI: Sorry to disappoint you Kaiba, but we dueled for food. You never mentioned water.
KAIBA: *still panting* I SAID "PROVISIONS"!
MAI: *laughs* And I though you meant food. You want water, go get it from the river. Go on.
KAIBA: YOU! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!
MAI: Might want to get some water first. *laughs again*
KAIBA: *is about to hurt Mai, but stops and winces when he remembers what happened last time. Feeling very conscious, he rubs his shin*
MAI: So, aren't you going to get water?
KAIBA: *coughs a bit then tries acting relaxed* It's nothing I can't handle. *tries acting more composed* You just go and worry about yourself. *spoons some soup more cautiously into his mouth and grimaces*
MAI: *ignores Kaiba and concentrates on her own soup, pretending he no longer exists*
KAIBA: *after a few more mouthfuls, on the third mouthful he spits out his soup* YOU CALL THIS STUFF FOOD!?! IT TASTES MORE LIKE ROTTEN BANANAS FROM A LANDFILL!
MAI: *coolly:* And how would you know what rotten bananas from landfills taste like? Have you ever tried one? No, don't even bother answering that, you idiot, because bananas are biodegradable and would therefore decompose! There probably aren't that many rotten bananas in landfills, let alone fresh ones.
KAIBA: Shut up! Your cooking is fit for a bunch of nasty pigs!
MAI: Oh? Then it must be fit for you.
KAIBA: WATCH YOUR MOUTH! OR ELSE. . . . . . or else. . . . um. . . . uh. . . . .
MAI: Or else what? You better not insult my cooking anymore Seto Kaiba! It's all your gonna get from me, not counting a good and sound beating if you don't shut your trap soon and at least pretend for a while that someone had taught you manners, meaning GOOD manners, sometime in your life.
KAIBA: How do you eat this stuff?
MAI: Out here in the wild, the only person I can rely on is myself. I don't trust anybody else.
KAIBA: I asked you a simple question. Is it too hard for you to give a straight answer?
MAI: Want me to punch you? Or should I kick you again? Take your pick.
KAIBA: Can you even boil water properly?
MAI: My question only had two answers: punch, or kick. Are you so much of an idiot that you can't even answer that question?
KAIBA: Do you even know the difference between vegetables and fruits? I could swear you put in some pumpkin in there.
MAI: Yes or no question Kaiba. You've just proved I was very much mistaken, you're not a dumbo, you're not a stupid freak, you're not even an idiot. YOU'RE A MORON! No wait, scratch that, even morons have more brains than you because at least even they can answer "yes or no" questions. I know. . . . .you're an IDIOTIC MORON! *laughs to herself* I am sooooo good!
KAIBA: You fool, what are you ranting on about now?
*a rustle comes from a bush behind Kaiba. Mai abruptly stops laughing and gasps in shock as a person wearing a black mask and the costume of a ninja creeps up behind Kaiba. The person has a long butcher knife in one hand and a large club in the other*
MAI: KAIBA! Watch out, behind you!
KAIBA: What was that fool? I couldn't decipher your stuttering speech. You should really see a speech therapist. *cups his hand around his ear* Please excuse me, but could you repeat that?
MAI: KAIBA! THIS IS NO TIME FOR JOKES OR LAME INSULTS! YOU KNOW VERY WELL THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH MY SPEECH, BUT THERE WILL BE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOUR HEAD IF YOU DON'T TURN AROUND SOON! My mistake there's already something wrong with your head, but. . . . . . . .
KAIBA: *has not yet turned around and is looking at Mai, trying to think of another insult*
*the ninja is getting closer to Kaiba. He raises his club and prepares to deal a shattering blow to Kaiba's head*
MAI: KAIBA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*the club comes down with an eerie whistle*
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
So what will happen next? Will Kaiba turn around and duck, saving himself just (barely) in time? Or will the club make contact with his head and injure his brain (maybe even paralyze some parts of his body) for life? Or worse, will Kaiba die? And who is this mysterious person dressed like a ninja? Why does he want to kill Kaiba in the first place? Does this have anything to do with the (false) tournament Kaiba and Mai were invited to?
Um, this concludes the fourth chapter. Please R&R and uh I'll write more later. See, I kind of have a minor case of writer's block right now. . . . and yeah. I'll write more as soon as I figure out what's going to happen next.
