A/N: Thanks to Megan the Phantom Girlie for pointing out that Norrington's first name is actually James! Well… it's all cleared up in this chapter!
~*~
Norrington and Sparrow hurried out of the harbor as fast as the boat could take them. Norrington wasn't much help, because he was still paralyzed from the kiss.
Jack smacked him. That woke him up.
"Are ye gonna help me or not?"
"Must I?"
"Yes."
Suddenly, they saw a few boats speeding towards them, the first being commanded by Sampson.
"There he is, boys! We can't let him get away with our Snuggle Bunny!"
Norrington shrieked.
This caused the men in the boats to see him. Gillette, who was in a boat close to Sampson, shouted, "Don't you fear, James! We're coming to get you! Hold on!"
He turned to the boats behind him. "James is alive!"
The men in the boats all shouted loudly, "HUZZAH! HUZZAH! HUZZAH!!!"
Norrington shuddered. "They're Huzzah-ing. That's not a good sign, is it?"
"Nope. But look on the bright side!" said Jack with a smile.
"Bright side? What bright side?"
"None of them know your true name, Mr. Commodore Thomas Gregory Armand Matthew Michael Philip Betsy Pineapple Norrington the 13th and ¾."
"Yes, I've done quite a good job convincing them my name is James and… wait a minute! How do /you/ know my real name!?!"
"Me hat told me."
"Ah." Norrington looked out at the men in boats behind him. "Can we go any faster, Pirate?"
"CAPTIAN JACK SPARROW, DAMNIT!!! And yes, I suppose. Hold on, mate!"
He then pulled a few ropes, dropping out many an emergency sail.
"Now, bring me that horizon!" he said happily. Norrington smacked him upside the head.
"Less catch-phrasing, more moving!"
Jack scowled. "You bent me hat!"
He lovingly stroked it, and corrected the dent. He then grinned evilly, and made the ship go super-fast.
The wind whipped by at such an alarming speed, that it tore Norrington's wig off, and blew it out to sea.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" screamed Norrington. "WILSON!!!"
Jack and his hat cackled evilly.
"Good idea, luv." Jack whispered to his hat.
They lost the men behind them with ease, but Norrington sat down and cried. "Wilson…" he sobbed. "Can you ever forgive me…?"
He looked out to sea with a tragic expression on his face. "I loved you once…Goodbye, my love…"
"Aw, shut it, Commodore Needlepoint."
"That's NORRINGTON!"
"As soon as ye stop callin' me 'Pirate', maybe I'll be inclined to stop callin' you funny names that begin with 'N'…like Commodore Numchucks, and Commodore Ninja, and Commodore Nancy…"
"Okay, okay, I get the picture! Wait a minute, what the hell is that?"
Commodore Nancy…I mean, Norrington, pointed out to sea, where a little black dot was quickly approaching.
Sparrow took out a spyglass and looked.
"Barbossa." He said grimly.
"Barbossa? I thought you shot him!" cried Norrington.
"Aye, well, I guess death isn't as fatal as one would think…"
Norrington snatched the spyglass. "What on earth is he wearing?"
Barbossa smoothed the maroon silk of his dress. That damned wench Elizabeth had wrinkled it terribly. When Barbossa had finally got it back, he cried a little. He had been keeping that dress safe for years, wearing it only on special occasions…like today! Finally, the hot, sexy Commodore would be his! He looked up and saw the Commodore on the deck of the SS Seamonkey, watching him as he got steadily closer. Barbossa stood up in his rowboat, the Mini-Pearl, and waved.
"Yoo-hoo! Commodore Darling! Yoo-hoo!"
"Look, mate!" said Jack, clapping his hand on Norrington's shoulder. "You've made another friend!"
He was now very close to the side of the boat, and was blowing kisses.
Norrington shuddered. "Could you take care of him?"
"Happy to oblige, mate." Jack took out a pistol and lazily shot Barbossa in the chest.
"I… feel…" said Barbossa. "I…feel…pretty, oh so pretty, I feel pretty and witty, and gay! And I pity any girl who isn't me today! Lalalalala lala la lala!" he sang.
Norrington and Jack clapped their hands over their ears. "Make it stop!" Norrington moaned.
This time, Jack shot Barbossa in the head. Barbossa stopped singing the West Side Story classic, and collapsed in his rowboat.
"Thanks." Said Norrinton.
"My pleasure, mate. Savvy?" said Jack.
"Err…. Savvy." Answered Norrington.
