Author's Notes:

Sorry, guys, but this is an incomplete chapter. Right now, I'm still recovering part of the file that I've lost. So sorry as for the inconvenience. I chose to post this now because I've made you wait for so long already! Don't fret for I'll just be remembering what I wrote that was lost. I'll post the complete one ASAP in this same chapter (not add one more). I want each chapter to be about 5000 words so that by the 25th one, I'll be able to wrap this up and if I have the time, revise the whole thing (grammar check, clean up all A/Ns…).

STILL LOVING YOU…

By g3ozLizh

Chapter Eighteen

Yui swallowed the frustration that was building up inside her as she waited for Nakago to tell her truth that he should have shared with her.

                Nakago stalled for time before he answered, studying her expression. "Let's just say I did both of you a favor… only difference is" --- he then gave a curt bow which seemed to mock Yui --- "I prioritized you, Maiden of Seiryuu."

                "You --- you mean to tell me I have him for all the wrong reasons?" Yui asked incredulously.

                "Think of it as whatever you like." Nakago smirked. "That never bothered you before. If I recall correctly, you're all up to any lengths just to get what you want."

                "What exactly did you do this time, Nakago? Tell me!"

                "It's something you wouldn't understand. Wait a little more and see what happens. I assure you, you'll appreciate it by then rather than if you know about it now."

                "But you don't understand, Nakago! Having Tamahome isn't merely about getting even with Miaka or because I want her to suffer the way I did! No! This time, I want Tamahome not because of her or anything for that matter! I want Tamahome because I love him!"

                Nakago gave a short laugh. "Listen to yourself, Yui. You've not only have grown too soft but you've grown pathetic. Not likely what the Maiden of Seiryuu should be."

                "Then I don't want to be the Maiden of Seiryuu anymore!"

                With that, Nakago turned sharply to face her. He stared hard and Yui could have shrunk from that gaze if not for the overwhelming anger she had for him.

 "Really? Do you think it will be easy as that? You've sworn to protect this country, Yui. What would all those people say?"

                "I don't care!"

He continued on as if he didn't hear her. "You wouldn't do that or else I'll tell Tamahome what you did that he saw…"

                "What are you talking about? I didn't do anything!" She searched frantically in her mind what it was that Nakago made her do involving Tamahome but none surfaced.  "I'll tell him I didn't have anything to do with with whatever it is that you're saying!"

                "You will? Certainly he'll find that hard to believe when all the evidences point to you. You want him so bad so you ordered us to do a little trick. Why else would we want to capture him? Isn't it that from the start, we captured him for you, by your orders. And it would be too much of a coincidence that he had an ambush and woke up finding that you somehow saved him with your men."

                "I don't know what you're talking about, Nakago!" Yui felt herself falling and falling in a pit without knowing how she ended up lurching into it in the first place.

                "But you do now."

                "No, I don't! I --- "

                "Then it's better that way." He turned around with a flourish. "Now if you'll stop this unnecessary badgering. I have to attend to some unfinished business."

                Nakago had gone ten steps when Yui, fired with determination and confidence in her word against his, cried out, "Yes! He will believe me! He has been with me and I've shown him nothing but my sincerest feelings for him. There's no way he'll brush that off as an act! There's no way he'll believe someone like you! "

                Nakago shook his head as if pitying her. "Yui, Yui. You really think he would believe you? If you tell him now just to let him see that you have nothing to do with it, you're just throwing yourself to the snake pit. You get to tell him or I get to tell him. Either way, he won't believe any of us and that will just make him see what a poor mistake it had been of choosing you…"

                Yui choked back a rising feeling of defeat. "No… he will believe…" She was faltering by the second but she won't let him have the satisfaction of seeing her doubting her own words.

                "Do yourself a favor, Maiden of Seiryuu. Don't do anything drastic now that you know the grave consequences." He remained silent as she looked at her now misty eyes. Then he said quietly, "We're all in this together, Yui. You and I should stick together. I did what I could to help you with your unrequited love… the least you can do now is also do your part."

                With a swish of his cape and one last meaningful look at the girl tricked and trapped because of her own selfish desires and foolishness… or maybe of circumstance…, Nakago was gone.

~*@@@*~

Beautiful graceful hands started to untie the knot holding one of the many intricate pieces of her Chinese gown together. It tinkled as beads of various shapes of snowflakes clinked against each other through the delicate fabric; their inimitable details hidden by the cloth like snow melting on the last blossoms that autumn had not been able to paint gold.

                "Lady Houki, have you met the Maiden of Suzaku?"

                Houki glanced at her handmaid. "Why yes. She was not at all the girl I thought the god Suzaku would choose but nevertheless, she's very much one of a kind. She has this certain feistiness in her that I wish I had…"

She was silent for a while, fingers playing with the snow blue color of the hem, but resumed taking off her clothes a moment later.

                The handmaid began unbuttoning the back part and said conspiratorially, "Well, don't be, Lady Houki. I think His Highness would be much better marrying you --- "

                "Why! What a thing to say! Emperor Hotohori didn't as much hint to me that he is interested in me much less" --- she flushed crimson at this --- "marry me…" But one who had been with her for quite some time could not miss the spark of hope reflecting in her violet eyes. "What made you comment like that in the first place?"

                The handmaid bowed her head respectfully. "Forgive me for saying it but I've been around here for so many months --- not long but just enough for me to notice that all the Maiden of Suzaku seems to bring His Majesty is sadness. If at first I didn't notice it, it's only because His Majesty is not able to hide that sadness much longer now." She laid down the Chinese gown on the chair's arm before handing her lady's sleeping dress. "I'm just concerned, that's all. His Highness had been nothing but kind to his people and I think that he deserves to be happy."

                Houki was silent, contemplating what had just been revealed to her. She quietly donned on her sleeping dress and dismissed her handmaid for the night. She lied there, staring up at the bed's ceiling, hands clutched to the blankets, body unmoving. She stayed like that for an unusually number of minutes.

                …and all the while her heart was getting restless.

~*@@@*~

Restless, Miaka finally threw off the bed's covers and swung her legs to the side, slipping into her slippers and standing up, she began pacing around the room.

                For the few minutes she's doing this, her hand would every now and then rake and pull on her auburn hair.

                Oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why! Oh why must tell me what you told me, Hotohori? Aren't you happy with Houki. Isn't it that the two of you are eventually going to get married as what the townspeople had been talking about for weeks?

                Not having the answer, she opened her mouth and silently screamed out her frustration and sought the only escape she can have for now. Must have food, must have food… Was what she chanted to herself as she made her way to one of the kitchen that was recently situated to fit her rumbling stomach that would often wake half of the people in this side of the palace.

                As she entered the place, she stopped in her tracks. Someone else was already there, drinking a cup of what smelled to be as chrysanthemum honey tea… or that's what her all-knowing nose told her brain.

                "Miaka, you can stop staring and think that it's Houki that you're seeing when it's not."

                Relief flooded her system as she recognized the voice… and who else can she mistake for Houki but

                "Nuriko! What are you doing here? Don't you sleep way at the other side, part, wing --- whatever --- of the palace?"

                "Well, I wanted to sleep and so I chose this kitchen of a place --- what else can I be doing here? The same as why you're here. Only thing is I watch my weight and you don't."