Chapter 3: Emotional Shockwaves

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Pulling her jacket closer around her as she hiked along the path near the mountain that hid Sanctuary with Shalimar, Darien, and Brennan, Hope couldn't help but notice the beauty of the trees that fall day. The leaves had turned golden as they prepared for winter and it somehow relaxed each of them, temporarily turning their worried minds away from their missing mentor. Until now, there had been a pleasant silence between the four of them.

"Everything is like a painting out here," Hope said in a contemplative manner. Everyone looked at her, wondering what she meant. "It is as if we're not only looking at it- we're actually living it." She stopped and looked at the leaves again, continuing in a dreaming voice. "People within choose to either look at the picture without participating, or just stand around as only part of the scenery, or make the picture come alive."

Shalimar finally spoke up. "What do you mean, Hope?"

Looking at the ground, the red-haired girl answered, "For such a long time, I've been one of those that are only looking at the picture. Eckhart kept me away from the outside world, kept me from living authentically, living my own life, made me feel trapped." Tears, full of relief, slowly filled her eyes, blurring her vision for a second before they escaped to the open air.

"Once I came to Sanctuary, I actually felt as if I were actually in a painting and that I was at last where I belonged, where I could be myself unashamedly, uninhibitedly. And-" she paused to grasp air with her lungs, "- and I owe that to all of you guys. I can't tell you how awesome it feels to be free from Eckhart's heartless, stifling mind games. I- thank you, guys. Thank you so much- you five- you helped me escape. A famous person once said, 'And you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free.' Thank you for helping me find the truth. You all helped set me free!"

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As soon as they were inside Sanctuary, laughing because of some jokes everyone exchanged, Lexa met them. She looked more angry than they had ever seen her. "There is a major problem, you guys- Eckhart sent a holograph message, saying that, if none of us tells him where Sanctuary is, and if Adam refuses to tell him, he'll hook him up to some wierd machine- the Vampire, I believe he called it."

Hope winced as she spoke. "That's exactly what it's called, Lexa- I've seen it myself. And that is it's job, guys- it basically drains a person's blood out of them, mummifying them alive." Then, gulping several times, she continued. "And I'm as guilty as Eckhart is. You see, when I was six years old, I was very into building things with legos and a big science kit.

"He asked me to help him build something, sort of a daddy/daughter bonding thing. What he didn't tell me was that what we'd be building was some sort of death machine, so I thought nothing of it. It wasn't until about three weeks ago when I saw him kill my mother with that thing- because I was not his daughter!"

Suddenly she looked as if she had been physically cut by this memory and she started shaking violently as she cried loudly, "Just because I wasn't their child was no excuse for killing my mother! He thought he could get away with murdering her- now he's trying to kill my father with the very same method he used to take my mother's life! HOW DARE HE!" She was screaming, unseeing, venting all the anger that was pent up against Mason Eckhart. "I WON'T LET YOU WIN, ECKHART! I WON'T LET YOU!"

She was gasping for air, her head spinning, her heart quaking in her chest, the floor began to shake, all before she collapsed to the floor. Shalimar was first by her side and called Hope's name, to no avail for the moment. Jesse picked her up and took her to the medical lab, praying, for a rare few seconds, that she was all right, since she had obviously been through a lot of tough times.

Watching his fellow team members follow Jesse, who carried Hope, Darien waited until they had all gone into the med lab to weap himself. His dear friend had been trying hard not to show the pain she felt and, up until today, had done it very well. Her way of releasing anger until now was to go somewhere to be alone, a place where she could cry, scream, cause an earthquake in that area. Now he realized that her torrent of rage wasn't out of anger- it was emotional pain within her, a pain that refused to stay caged any longer.

It reminded him of when he himself felt alone, lost, afraid, furious with the world. His own parents, all full of themselves and ignorant, didn't fight for him when his aunt and uncle started to abuse he and his sister. When the aunt and uncle died, he thought that the proof left behind on his sister CV and himself would convince their parents to help him. It did not work.

It was an amazement that their grandmother took them in under her wing when their parents died. She was the only rightful guardian that the Child Protective Services would allow to take care of them, despite opposition. It took years for him to open up enough to befriend Hope and share their deep, dark secrets. After washing his face, he went to the med lab to check up on the girl that he was now starting to feel something for. On his way, a startling thought came to him; 'Could I actually be falling in love with her?'

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It was around midnight when Hope finally regained sensation, although she didn't open her eyes. Her sudden rage shocked even her, as she had never gone through such a fit before. At the same time that she felt terrible about it, she was feeling a little bit better. The hurt, the anger, the pain she felt was lessened now, but it was still there. She felt a cool washcloth being gently brushed across her face. She groaned softly, in a weak voice, realizing that sometime during her unconcious state, she had had a fever, which had just then broken.

"Hey," came Shalimar's whispering voice. "Feeling better, yet?"

"Shal? Is that you?" Hope wimpered in a scared voice.

"Yeah, Hope, I'm right here, sweetie," the gentle voice replied. Her eyes were forcing themselves open to see her friend's sweet face. "You were pretty worn out, huh?"

"Yeah." It was said in a whisper. Hope found that she was out of tears, but she wasn't out of grief. She had lashed out in anger in front of her new friends and, worst of all, in front of Darien! "Shal?" She started to say.

"Hmm?"

"I'm sorry about everything I said. I hadn't meant to worry about Eckhart and what he said he'd do to Adam." Sighing deeply, she said, "I guess worrying does strangle people- mentally and emotionally, certainly; but it can physically strangle someone, too. Can you forgive me?" Looking into her friend's eyes, she saw a twinkle of understanding and caring.

"What's to forgive, Hope?" Shalimar asked. "You went through some very tough things, and the pain from them wouldn't stay within you. If you mean that you want forgiveness for losing your temper, sweetie, I forgive you. If you mean you want it for helping Mr. Anti-Einstein with that machine, then there's no need- you were young enough for him to control, so he's the one who needs to pay."

Leaning forward, she continued, "Hope, your name means the same as the word. The word 'hope' means believing that something good will happen, whether the situation is good or bad, whether people are for you or against you, whether you have a good past or a bad past. I know it may be hard for you to take me at my word, but losing hope is about as bad as worrying.

"Pesimistic ideas, as a matter of fact, are purely ideas one makes up that causes one to worry; thus they strangle any, if not all, chances of hope starting a wildfire within them. You've got more hope than any pesimist that I know, and that includes Eckhart. If you keep hope alive in you, there's no question that whatever worry there is left will strangle itself out just worrying about not making you worry!" There was a goofy smile on her face, causing Hope to laugh at last.

"Sorry, Worry- ya gatta go now! Never gonna see ya again!" Hope said in her hand/phone, a twinkle glowing in her own eye. "Buh-bye!" Now both girls were laughing uncontrolably, making everyone else, who had all been unable to sleep that night, run to see what all the laughter was about. But that only sent them into another fit of giggles and, quite accidentally, a snort from both Hope and Shalimar, which only added to the wildfire. It caused everyone else to join them, still clueless as to the joke.

Later, when the girls tried to settle down, for one last night before Hope moved into her new room, the memory of their joke and the silence itself made them snicker harder all the more. And it continued for the rest of the night, but despite the lack of sleep the next morning, both girls, though more calm, smiled broadly. The other team members still didn't get the joke, but that didn't bother the now-best-friends, who were eager to face the day.