Chapter Three

          Willow went tumbling, ass over kettle, down the long road known as Memory Lane – though Willow preferred the term Hell Drive. It was hard enough to move on after Oz. He had been Willow's first true love and the hitch: he had loved her back. Willow had actually believed that Oz was her match in life, the one she was meant to grow old with. She had been wrong.

          "The wolf is inside me, Willow. All the time," he had tried to explain to her, unable to meet her eyes which were flooded with heartbroken tears. "I don't know anymore where the line is between me and it and until I figure out what that means I shouldn't be around you. Or anyone."

          Willow had pleaded with Oz, begged him not to leave her and forget her but his mind was set and when all was said and done Willow could ask only one question, "Don't you love me?"

          "My whole life I've never loved anything else."

          The after effects of that breakup, however, will never be forgotten. Drowning in her grief Willow had turned to magic and, as always, things didn't turn out so well. Giles went blind, Xander became a demon magnet and Buffy, well Buffy ended up engaged to Spike. Willow was still apologizing for that screw up.

          Time passed, as it has the habit of doing, and the fates brought a new love into Willow's life: Tara. It had been wholly unexpected but it turned out to be exactly what Willow needed and before she had time to realize it the redhead found herself hopelessly in love with the blonde witch. Time, however, is incredibly ironic and just as her new relationship with Tara was starting to take off Oz performs an amazing reappearing act and Willow's life is once more turned upside-down.

          At the end of the day, though, Willow was a different person then she had been before Oz left to "find himself" and that part of her heart that he had left hollow had been filled by Tara. Willow had moved on and Oz had been too late.

          "You're happy?"

          Willow had met Oz's eyes somewhat reluctantly. She felt, oddly, as though she'd somehow betrayed Oz by moving on. It was foolish, Willow knew, but the emotion hung at the back of her throat nonetheless. For so long Oz had been her world and Willow couldn't help but think if only she'd waited a little longer…

          "I am," she answered lowly. "I can't really explain it but…"

          Oz had taken Willow's hand in his own and smiled that Oz-smile. "It may be safer for both of us if you don't."

          One last kiss on the cheek and Willow forced herself to walk away. Oz never saw the tears that stained her cheeks or heard the grief in her sobs. He was gone, for good, and Willow was forced to truly say goodbye.

          "Wills?"

          Jarred from her thoughts, and pulled away from Hell Drive, Willow turned her head away from the window. She, Spike and Christopher were riding in Angel's old clunker of a car while the others followed in Xander's van – actually it was his mom's van but who keeps track of technicalities anyway, right? "Sorry, what was that Spike?"

          The bleached vampire grinned and shook his head. "Don't worry about it, love."

          Sighing, Willow nodded absentmindedly and turned her face back to the blackened window, starring out of a small paint-free hole she scratched with her fingernail. Noting the road sign on the side of Interstate 5, which they passed at 75 mph, Willow gauged that they were about an hour outside of Los Angeles and probably another fifteen from the Hyperion Hotel – home of Angel Investigations.

          Taking a deep breath, Willow prayed for the strength she needed to handle seeing Oz again. "I can do this."