"Remy darling."
"Whatcha want Cher?"
"Will you be my champion?"
Remy looked up from his chess game with Vanyel, (Which much to his chagrin he was losing, unaware of course that Darkdancer had given Van the tactical abilities of grown self, which were formidable because lots of people wanted to kill him) "An' who you be wantin' Remy to champion you against?"
"My evil math homework."
"Por Quoi Moi?"
"I'm in Latin now, not French I don't want to remember French class."
"You can't remember French class," Tom pointed out, not looking up from his painting, which was supposed to be Voyager but Pietro thought looked more like a butterfly and Ichabod swore was a dog. Jack, of course, thought it was a bottle of Rum. "You spent the entire time reading."
"And writing fanfic about you." Darkdancer pointed out.
"And writing fanfic about me." Tom acknowledged. "But the point is the only reason you got an "A" is because everyone else slept and you bluffed your way through using things you happened to overhear or read."
"So? I still got an 'A' and the point is I have no idea what Remy said."
"You wrote it didn't you?" Van asked.
"THIRD WALL VANYEL!" Everyone reminded him loudly.
"Oops." Van blushed
"Remy asked why you chose him Cher." Remy translated.
"Because you strike me as the Knight in Shining Armor type."
"In other words ye're the only one gullible enough that could fight this "math homework" creature." Jack slurred, lounging on the sofa with his hat resting over his eyes.
"Math homework is not a creature, it is a set of sums given to students to help them learn to apply the skills they were taught in the classroom." Ichabod pontificated, tearing his attention away from the Lava lamp with difficulty.
"But we learned it Last Year! How am I supposed to remember it? I barely understood it then! It's complicated and confusing word problems that won't clarify themselves so I can solve them. So I want Remy to defeat it for me."
"Remy could never turn down a lovely lady Cher."
"But what about me?" Darkdancer begged.
"You da one Remy referring to Cher."
"Oh good!" Darkdancer beamed, ecstatic at the imminent defeat of the evil math homework that had thwarted her will and frustrated her, causing her to want to throw things at someone, like a math teacher for instance. "And as a reward for your valiant effort I'll type the next chapter of your fic."
"We gettin' to th' good parts soon Cher?"
"Soon, soon, I don't want you to seem easy."
"Remy don't mind, Remy want lovin'"
"Remy!"
"Wha?"
