Dream Time
Trance stirred slightly, yawned, and delved deeper beneath the warmly intoxicating sheets. After several long, hazy seconds, she forced herself more awake, and sat up properly.
Harper blinked his eyes opened, yawned, and mumbled, "Morning..." before falling asleep again.
With a fond smile, Trance leaned down, planted a kiss on his temple, and slid out of bed. She pitter-pattered across the marble floor, flung with rugs and clothes, in her white, cotton night dress, the thin straps of which criss-crossed down her back. The room was a mixture of computers and plants. Huge glass doors at the front showed an empty beach, the sun just creeping over the horizon, turning the water pale pink, sending orange fingers streaking across the yellowing sky to grasp at the new day, and bathing their room in soft, lavender light. Finding what she needed, she made herself some herbal tea, Harper some coffee, which he was always grouchy without in the mornings, carried them both back to bed, put the coffee down and slid back between the covers. Sipping her tea, sat up, with Harper just starting to stir beside her, she watched as the sun rose, changing the light in the room from lavender to orange.
Such beauty in a troubled world.
Harper sat up, suddenly, as he always did, blinking. Quietly she handed him his coffee and waited for the smell to bring him closer to the land of the living.
"Ahhh, coffee." Harper sighed, taking a sip. She cleared her throat pointedly. "And thank you for making it." He obliged.
"You're welcome." She smiled.
He swallowed most of the coffee in one gulp, put the cup aside, then wrapped his arms around her. Trance sighed, taking long, comforting breaths of the oh-so-familiar smell of his cotton vest. How could this all feel so real? It would be so tempting to remain here, safe and sound, with Harper still alive. But even if she wanted to, she couldn't.
After all, dreams never lasted forever.
"Harper," she spoke after a while, "we have to talk."
"Mmm?" Harper was toying with a strand of her hair, "why?"
"Because this isn't real, is it?" She enquired.
He held her away from her for a second, then agreed with a cheerful smile. "Not really. At least, I don't think so."
"This is a flash back, isn't it?" She continued, steadily. "Or a flash forward. It's all happened already, in my future. In our future. This is exactly a month before you die."
"Do we have to talk about that?" Harper looked pained. "I really don't like delving into that particular part of my history, or future, very much. Besides, how do you know?"
"Because I'm going gold." Trance held out her bare arms. They were indeed somewhere between pale purple and gold. Her face too, was changing. Her cheek bones were dusted with an ever deepening yellow, while her nose was still deep indigo. Colour change was an unnerving but essential part of her growth process. "But I'm still in between. This is near the end of the nice period. The bit where everything is okay for once. Even if it did only last for three months."
"Yeah, I like this bit." Harper sighed, stretching.
"Harper!" Trance cried. "Would you stop doing this to me?!"
"Doing what?" He quirked an innocent eyebrow.
"Haunting me!" Trance leapt out of bed and began pacing furiously up and down. "Isn't it enough that I've saved the past you? Why do you still come back at night like this? Why am I always reliving these three months, over and over again? Can't you see that it's just hurting more and more every time?"
"Maybe because you want to." Harper spread his hands diplomatically. "Maybe it's not me at all. Maybe it's the past me, fantasying about you. I mean, I used to do that you know."
"Oh yeah, and tell me, Harper, were any of your fantasies this close to what actually happened?" Trance demanded.
Harper got out of bed and followed her across the room. "Well... no." He admitted, sheepishly.
"Besides." Trance spun back round to face him in his vest and boxers. "This isn't a fantasy. This happened. And it's real, Harper, it's solid. In dreams you can't touch things. They're unpredictable and dream sense takes over. This is logical, I'm thinking and I'm having a conversation with you that actually makes sense."
Gently, Harper allowed her to step into his arms, holding her close, kissing her steadily reddening, blond hair.
"This gets harder every time." She whispered, into his chest.
"I know." Harper told her, lifting her chin and wresting his forehead against hers.
"I wish we could get this back." Trance sighed, shutting her eyes.
"Which?" Harper asked, softly. "The house, the three months, us...?"
"All of it." She replied. "Us especially. Yes, I'd settle for just us. I miss you so much. The past you doesn't trust me. Doesn't know me. None of them do."
"Maybe you should tell them what you are." Harper murmured.
"No." Trance shook her head slightly, not breaking contact. "They aren't ready for that yet."
"Then what will you do?" He asked.
"Gain their trust. Look after them all. Make sure that their future doesn't turn out the same way this one did." Trance sighed, wearily. "So far, so good."
"You'll still have me, Trance." Harper told her. "I mean, so I'm a little skittish of a golden you. You know what I'm like, right? It'll take a while for me to get used to you, but I'll come round. I always do, right? Right?"
He gave her head a nudge with his own, to enforce the message, and smiled.
"That's why I love you, Seamus Harper."
"Yeah, well, like anyone needs a reason to love you." He gave her a charming grin and planted a kiss on her lips. "Now, do you wanna live out this flash forward or are we just gonna stand here all morning until you wake up?"
"I'll settled for standing here, thank you very much." Trance replied, leaning into him. "If this is the day I think it is, then I don't want to relive any of it."
"Yep, this is the day when everything starts to go horribly wrong." Harper agreed. "I'll stay here too, I think."
"So..." Trance was thoughtful. "You used to fantasise about me?"
"Yep. Purple you, anyway." Harper grinned. "I don't know whether I ever fantasised about golden you because of course, I being part of an alternative future from the one you are oh-so-successfully creating, don't remember it. But, knowing me... probably."
Trance shook her head. "I don't think I want to know this."
"You brought it up, my purple princess." He replied, then paused, frowning. "Am I still allowed to call you that? I mean, you're not exactly... purple any more, are you?"
"Not in the past." Trance shook her head again. "Here I'm in between."
Harper considered this carefully. "So... what? You're my half gold half purple princess now?"
"Possibly." Trance laughed, softly.
"Naaa." Harper shook his head. "That just doesn't have the same ring to it. You need a new nick-name. I mean, while you're here, of course."
Trance was also thinking, but along different lines. "What happens to you, Harper, when I'm not here?"
"What, when you're not dreaming about me?" Harper asked, then shrugged. "I guess I don't exist."
"But that would make you a figment of my imagination, and figments of my imagination aren't meant to be this solid." Trance stepped back from him and gave him a poke to add testimony to her reply.
"Well, did you ever think that maybe a part of me was preserved in you when I died?" Harper asked, for once devoid of his playful tone, indicating her heart.
Trance put a hand over her heart. "That's a very romantic notion, Harper."
"I know." Harper grimaced, then managed a grin. "Doesn't sound at all like me, does it? That must be your influence. Living on after death in your heart has got to do that to a guy."
Trance smiled at him. "Yeah."
"Hey, you're going gold again." Harper observed.
Trance looked down. It was true. She was returning to her real, golden self. The clothes she had fallen asleep in were reappearing in place of her cotton night dress. Her hair was completely auburn again, and longer, thicker, pleated up.
"Back to the real world again." She sighed.
Harper nodded. "Yeah. You'll be fine, Trance, babes. Just fine."
"That's what you said when you died." Trance replied, softly.
He nodded again. "It's true, though." He took both her hands in his own and kissed them gently. "Good luck."
"I'll need it." Trance held tightly to his hands as she felt her dream world fade around her. As everything disappeared like a cloud of smoke, Harper's grip became less firm, less distinct, and she couldn't see him so well.
Like a swimmer coming up for air, Trance broke the surface of consciousness in the real world, sitting up in bed. In place of Harper's hands, she found herself clutching the sheets.
She wasn't disturbed, or crying, as she normally was after waking up from a 'flash back/forward'. She lifted the sheets to her nose and sniffed, shutting her eyes and taking comfort in the familiarity of the scent. Letting go of the material carefully, she turned away from the bed, standing up. After a moment's reflection, she placed a hand over her heart again, wondering at what the past Harper had told her. Maybe a piece of me was preserved in you when I died.
Was it really possible that a piece of Harper's consciousness had managed to get lodged within her? Stranger things had happened, certainly. The comfort was that Harper was still there, the past Harper, ready to talk to her in her dream time. Not that she let herself sleep very much these days. She didn't need to. She slept for old times sake, and those instances were few and far between.
And there was this Harper, safe and sound in this past. This present. Because this was the present now, and she knew she would have to accept that. She couldn't live her life in the past, longing for a time she could never get back, no matter how tempting that was. Maybe one day, this Harper would become her old Harper, and then maybe, just maybe things could become more like they were. Maybe they would be better.
But until then, there was always dream time.
Trance stirred slightly, yawned, and delved deeper beneath the warmly intoxicating sheets. After several long, hazy seconds, she forced herself more awake, and sat up properly.
Harper blinked his eyes opened, yawned, and mumbled, "Morning..." before falling asleep again.
With a fond smile, Trance leaned down, planted a kiss on his temple, and slid out of bed. She pitter-pattered across the marble floor, flung with rugs and clothes, in her white, cotton night dress, the thin straps of which criss-crossed down her back. The room was a mixture of computers and plants. Huge glass doors at the front showed an empty beach, the sun just creeping over the horizon, turning the water pale pink, sending orange fingers streaking across the yellowing sky to grasp at the new day, and bathing their room in soft, lavender light. Finding what she needed, she made herself some herbal tea, Harper some coffee, which he was always grouchy without in the mornings, carried them both back to bed, put the coffee down and slid back between the covers. Sipping her tea, sat up, with Harper just starting to stir beside her, she watched as the sun rose, changing the light in the room from lavender to orange.
Such beauty in a troubled world.
Harper sat up, suddenly, as he always did, blinking. Quietly she handed him his coffee and waited for the smell to bring him closer to the land of the living.
"Ahhh, coffee." Harper sighed, taking a sip. She cleared her throat pointedly. "And thank you for making it." He obliged.
"You're welcome." She smiled.
He swallowed most of the coffee in one gulp, put the cup aside, then wrapped his arms around her. Trance sighed, taking long, comforting breaths of the oh-so-familiar smell of his cotton vest. How could this all feel so real? It would be so tempting to remain here, safe and sound, with Harper still alive. But even if she wanted to, she couldn't.
After all, dreams never lasted forever.
"Harper," she spoke after a while, "we have to talk."
"Mmm?" Harper was toying with a strand of her hair, "why?"
"Because this isn't real, is it?" She enquired.
He held her away from her for a second, then agreed with a cheerful smile. "Not really. At least, I don't think so."
"This is a flash back, isn't it?" She continued, steadily. "Or a flash forward. It's all happened already, in my future. In our future. This is exactly a month before you die."
"Do we have to talk about that?" Harper looked pained. "I really don't like delving into that particular part of my history, or future, very much. Besides, how do you know?"
"Because I'm going gold." Trance held out her bare arms. They were indeed somewhere between pale purple and gold. Her face too, was changing. Her cheek bones were dusted with an ever deepening yellow, while her nose was still deep indigo. Colour change was an unnerving but essential part of her growth process. "But I'm still in between. This is near the end of the nice period. The bit where everything is okay for once. Even if it did only last for three months."
"Yeah, I like this bit." Harper sighed, stretching.
"Harper!" Trance cried. "Would you stop doing this to me?!"
"Doing what?" He quirked an innocent eyebrow.
"Haunting me!" Trance leapt out of bed and began pacing furiously up and down. "Isn't it enough that I've saved the past you? Why do you still come back at night like this? Why am I always reliving these three months, over and over again? Can't you see that it's just hurting more and more every time?"
"Maybe because you want to." Harper spread his hands diplomatically. "Maybe it's not me at all. Maybe it's the past me, fantasying about you. I mean, I used to do that you know."
"Oh yeah, and tell me, Harper, were any of your fantasies this close to what actually happened?" Trance demanded.
Harper got out of bed and followed her across the room. "Well... no." He admitted, sheepishly.
"Besides." Trance spun back round to face him in his vest and boxers. "This isn't a fantasy. This happened. And it's real, Harper, it's solid. In dreams you can't touch things. They're unpredictable and dream sense takes over. This is logical, I'm thinking and I'm having a conversation with you that actually makes sense."
Gently, Harper allowed her to step into his arms, holding her close, kissing her steadily reddening, blond hair.
"This gets harder every time." She whispered, into his chest.
"I know." Harper told her, lifting her chin and wresting his forehead against hers.
"I wish we could get this back." Trance sighed, shutting her eyes.
"Which?" Harper asked, softly. "The house, the three months, us...?"
"All of it." She replied. "Us especially. Yes, I'd settle for just us. I miss you so much. The past you doesn't trust me. Doesn't know me. None of them do."
"Maybe you should tell them what you are." Harper murmured.
"No." Trance shook her head slightly, not breaking contact. "They aren't ready for that yet."
"Then what will you do?" He asked.
"Gain their trust. Look after them all. Make sure that their future doesn't turn out the same way this one did." Trance sighed, wearily. "So far, so good."
"You'll still have me, Trance." Harper told her. "I mean, so I'm a little skittish of a golden you. You know what I'm like, right? It'll take a while for me to get used to you, but I'll come round. I always do, right? Right?"
He gave her head a nudge with his own, to enforce the message, and smiled.
"That's why I love you, Seamus Harper."
"Yeah, well, like anyone needs a reason to love you." He gave her a charming grin and planted a kiss on her lips. "Now, do you wanna live out this flash forward or are we just gonna stand here all morning until you wake up?"
"I'll settled for standing here, thank you very much." Trance replied, leaning into him. "If this is the day I think it is, then I don't want to relive any of it."
"Yep, this is the day when everything starts to go horribly wrong." Harper agreed. "I'll stay here too, I think."
"So..." Trance was thoughtful. "You used to fantasise about me?"
"Yep. Purple you, anyway." Harper grinned. "I don't know whether I ever fantasised about golden you because of course, I being part of an alternative future from the one you are oh-so-successfully creating, don't remember it. But, knowing me... probably."
Trance shook her head. "I don't think I want to know this."
"You brought it up, my purple princess." He replied, then paused, frowning. "Am I still allowed to call you that? I mean, you're not exactly... purple any more, are you?"
"Not in the past." Trance shook her head again. "Here I'm in between."
Harper considered this carefully. "So... what? You're my half gold half purple princess now?"
"Possibly." Trance laughed, softly.
"Naaa." Harper shook his head. "That just doesn't have the same ring to it. You need a new nick-name. I mean, while you're here, of course."
Trance was also thinking, but along different lines. "What happens to you, Harper, when I'm not here?"
"What, when you're not dreaming about me?" Harper asked, then shrugged. "I guess I don't exist."
"But that would make you a figment of my imagination, and figments of my imagination aren't meant to be this solid." Trance stepped back from him and gave him a poke to add testimony to her reply.
"Well, did you ever think that maybe a part of me was preserved in you when I died?" Harper asked, for once devoid of his playful tone, indicating her heart.
Trance put a hand over her heart. "That's a very romantic notion, Harper."
"I know." Harper grimaced, then managed a grin. "Doesn't sound at all like me, does it? That must be your influence. Living on after death in your heart has got to do that to a guy."
Trance smiled at him. "Yeah."
"Hey, you're going gold again." Harper observed.
Trance looked down. It was true. She was returning to her real, golden self. The clothes she had fallen asleep in were reappearing in place of her cotton night dress. Her hair was completely auburn again, and longer, thicker, pleated up.
"Back to the real world again." She sighed.
Harper nodded. "Yeah. You'll be fine, Trance, babes. Just fine."
"That's what you said when you died." Trance replied, softly.
He nodded again. "It's true, though." He took both her hands in his own and kissed them gently. "Good luck."
"I'll need it." Trance held tightly to his hands as she felt her dream world fade around her. As everything disappeared like a cloud of smoke, Harper's grip became less firm, less distinct, and she couldn't see him so well.
Like a swimmer coming up for air, Trance broke the surface of consciousness in the real world, sitting up in bed. In place of Harper's hands, she found herself clutching the sheets.
She wasn't disturbed, or crying, as she normally was after waking up from a 'flash back/forward'. She lifted the sheets to her nose and sniffed, shutting her eyes and taking comfort in the familiarity of the scent. Letting go of the material carefully, she turned away from the bed, standing up. After a moment's reflection, she placed a hand over her heart again, wondering at what the past Harper had told her. Maybe a piece of me was preserved in you when I died.
Was it really possible that a piece of Harper's consciousness had managed to get lodged within her? Stranger things had happened, certainly. The comfort was that Harper was still there, the past Harper, ready to talk to her in her dream time. Not that she let herself sleep very much these days. She didn't need to. She slept for old times sake, and those instances were few and far between.
And there was this Harper, safe and sound in this past. This present. Because this was the present now, and she knew she would have to accept that. She couldn't live her life in the past, longing for a time she could never get back, no matter how tempting that was. Maybe one day, this Harper would become her old Harper, and then maybe, just maybe things could become more like they were. Maybe they would be better.
But until then, there was always dream time.
