*Guilty Gear, its characters and settings are property of Sammy Studios, and are being used in this fanfiction without permission.  This fic is rated R for violence and sexual content, and it contains yaoi material. 

Culmination

Chapter 9

There was a solemn air about Mayship when Ky and Testament returned, making their way through the narrow corridors.  Ky didn't speak a word, and, still holding his elbow, Testament was able to feel there was still a dull tremor that ran through his skin every once in a while.  The Gear was relieved that Ky didn't try to protest or question.  It made everything much simpler as he led the man to the infirmary.  On the way they passed one of the girls' rooms, and a quick peek inside showed Bridget, surrounded by three members of the crew as they listened to his story and tried to console him.  Further down they came across Dizzy and May, speaking in hushed tones.  Dizzy sent him a concerned look but he only nodded, assuring her that all was being taken care of.

In the infirmary Testament silently cleaned and bandaged the small wounds on Ky's back.  The result of metal against freshly healed burns wasn't pleasant to look at, and the area would certainly be tender for a while, but it didn't seem to be anything serious.  Nothing like the injuries he had treated Ky for several days ago.  Distantly he could hear the sound of the ship's engines being spurred into life, and soon after they were taking off.  Testament glanced only briefly to the porthole to watch Rome's airfield slipping away, and once they were fully airborne the city looked no more than a wide, black stain against darker earth.

"You said you wanted to show me something."

Testament turned back to Ky, judging his face.  He looked exhausted but there was still something sharp in his eyes, a familiar restlessness.  Though in truth he had expected simply to get Ky cleaned up and sent to bed, looking at him now he knew that wouldn't be enough.

"If you're up for it."  And when Ky nodded Testament helped him out of his chair, leading the way once more through the ship.

*****

Ky wasn't sure what to expect; he had assumed that Testament had only said as much as a means of getting him back on the ship, but now it appeared he had an actual destination in mind.  Whatever it was, he would have no complaints.  Anything was better than being left to his thoughts, as crazed and distorted as they now were.

He hadn't been paying attention, and when Ky blinked himself aware he found Testament was opening the hatches that led to the outer hull.  Though suddenly curious he didn't question, and soon they were both following a sturdy handrail to the ship's wing.  It had been set up as a sundeck of sorts, with plenty of rails to hold on to and even places that appeared to be for sitting.  It didn't seem to be the safest of places, but with all the designs and small drawings along the wing and hull it was clear people came here often.

"The girls come up here sometimes, especially to watch Johnny practice," Testament explained as he leaned against the forward rail.  "At least, that's what Dizzy tells me."  Rome was at their back now, but Ky allowed himself only a fleeting glance before joining the Gear.  The wind was forceful but he found he didn't have to hold on too tightly to keep himself upright and settled.

"I kind of like it, at night," Testament continued as he rested a single hand on the rail.  "The wind seems to go right through you; it has something of a calming effect on me."  He shook his head, the wind catching his hair and lifting it in long strands behind him.  Ky had to admit he understood immediately why such a place appealed to Testament; standing there against the night, his hair and leather clothing billowing with the breeze, his back straight despite the motion and face serene…he looked majestic, maybe even beautiful.  But most of all the wind, the rustle of fabric and the dull whine from the engines were indeed calming in their low monotony.  Ky sighed, allowing it all in, hoping Testament's words would prove true and resettle his twisting insides.

They remained that way for some time, side by side but saying nothing as Mayship adjusted her course to the west.   It was Ky who finally broke the silence.  "I was wrong, wasn't I.  About everything."

He felt Testament's gaze slip to him but he didn't look, keeping his eyes trained to where distant hills melted into the starless night.  "I don't know," the Gear admitted.  "Everything you said…it is suspicious, and he didn't try to argue.  But you're wrong about him and this ship.  I don't think he would ever betray these children."

"No…"  Ky lowered his head guilty.  "No, I don't think so, either.  I just…had to say something."  His fists tightened around the railing.  "I don't know why.  That…wasn't like me at all.  At least…."

"You hope it's not."

Ky sighed.  It was both comforting and a little disheartening that Testament seemed to understand what he was feeling so well—it led to even more questions in need of answers.  "Testament…do you think me a fool?  Johnny and Bridget didn't understand, but you…"  He risked a glance at the Gear, and was encouraged by his calm, thoughtful expression.  "You understand, don't you?  Why I…."

"Not entirely," Testament admitted.  "I don't know what happened between you and Sol, but…yes.  Maybe if I'd had your conviction, I would have chased after The Ninth in the same way."

Ky blinked up at him questioningly.  "The Ninth?"

Testament straightened, as if realizing all at once that he'd spoken the name aloud.  It was then that Ky started to understand how similar he and Testament really were; the look of anxious strain flashing across the Gear's face was all too familiar to him.  "The man we faced," he confessed at long last.  "I met him…during the Crusades.  I only knew him as The Ninth—ninth out of fifteen Anti-Gear weapons the Bureau was developing."

"I see."  Though not the most detailed explanation, Testament's reaction to the man made much more sense; as one of the Bureau's weapons he had probably been made to hunt Testament.  It wasn't quite as similar a situation to him and Sol as he had been hoping to hear, but still he understood the kind of intensity that would have passed through such a relationship.

"Sol…."  Ky gulped, pressing his eyes shut against images of the man.  "Whenever he shows up I'm not myself anymore.  It's…embarrassing."

Testament considered that a moment, shifting his weight.  "Can you tell me?"

He had been waiting for that.  With the city at their back the story was already so heavy on his lips, and that quiet prodding was what he needed to let it all spill out, as if it were lying ready all along.  "Did you know Sol used to be in the Holy Order?" he began, so grateful that Testament was willing to listen that he couldn't find the words to thank him.  He wasn't even sure if he cared Testament heard him, so much as allowed him the chance to speak.  "It was just after I was Knighted as their Captain." 

Testament hummed thoughtfully beside him.  "I'd heard rumors."

"He was probably the worst soldier that ever served under me," Ky continued with a tiny snort.  "He'd never listen to orders, was always going off alone—he never treated me or any of the other officers with respect."  He smirked bitterly.  "And somehow he always managed to get the job done.  He'd run off by himself and come back without a scratch when the mission was over.  Sometimes we weren't even sure if he'd done anything.  But even if we didn't see him he never lost a fight."

Ky lifted his head slightly, taking Testament's earlier advice in letting the wind wash over him, through him.  "I have to admit, I was a little awed by him myself.  There was always a sense among the soldiers—or maybe just a joke—that whatever happened, Sol would somehow screw up and end up saving us.  I sometimes imagined that if I were able to tame that recklessness of his…maybe it would prove my abilities as their leader.  I was so young and uncertain then, but I knew that if I could get Sol on my side—for real—it would prove to everyone, and myself, that I really was the Captain of the Holy Order.

"But I was never enough to handle him."  Ky's fingers tighten subtly against the metal rail.  "Sol never let anyone close to him, never put effort into any of our drills or practices.  And because no one ever really saw him complete a mission, I couldn't trust that he was as powerful as his boasts.  At first I thought he was putting up an attitude to impress the younger soldiers—later, that he simply had a problem with taking orders, and especially from me.  Either way, I never trusted him completely as one of our officers.  If only I'd known how strong he really was…if I'd been able to tell…."

Testament shifted slightly beside him.  "Are you saying that if you'd known how powerful he was, you would have let him get away with disrespect?"

Ky scoffed quietly.  "No.  Probably not.  But at least then I would have known what he was capable of—that I could trust him."

Testament was silent a moment, considering.  "It's not surprising," he murmured.  "If he had shown you all his full power, you probably would have started to suspect."

The hair on the back of Ky's neck prickled.  "Suspect…?"

"Trust him less," Testament quickly corrected himself, as if having given something away.  "So what happened?"

Ky frowned, but followed Testament's prodding.  He would have plenty to worry about after his story had finished.  "He left."  The words clawed through him bitterly, and he quickly forgot whatever Testament had been implying a moment ago.  "It wasn't long after we fought together to save the people of Rome.  Without a word he took Fireseal and abandoned us."  His hands tightened again and began to ache, but he gave them no notice.  "I knew he didn't like our ways, our discipline, but he didn't need to turn his back on us!  Even if he couldn't accept me as his captain, I could have been replaced.  Did he hate us that much that he couldn't bare to stand beside us, even for the sake of our world?"

"Ky…."

"I didn't see him for another two years after that," Ky continued, his voice sharp.  "We lost countless men to the attacks of the Gears, and not once did he lift a hand to help us.  Even when we rallied all our power for the final battle against Justice itself, it wasn't until the end when half our men had been slaughtered that he finally showed.  It wasn't until then that…I really understood."

In his mind's eye, he could still see it; the poisoned debris, bloodstained stones and streaking lightning—the form of Justice towering over them, flicking claws to rid them of wasted human life.  He remembered the blow to his skull that had felled him, the heat that woke him some time later to find his former master bloodied, and Justice enveloped in flame.  There was nothing more vivid in his memory than the silhouette of a tall figure against swirling, ungodly fire.

"Sol is more powerful than anything I've ever encountered.  I don't know how he came to be that way…why he didn't challenge Justice before that night…but I do know that he hid all those things from us."  Ky took in a long, deep breath.  "More than that, I misjudged him.  We needed him.  If I had known how powerful he was, I could have formed a better strategy for dealing with Justice that would not have cost the lives of so many innocent soldiers.  I would have forgone some of my own pride, if only to keep him with us for that purpose.  We struggled those two years when only one bit of knowledge could have brought us salvation.  Two years over the span of a hundred year crusade is indeed a short time, and yet…so many lives…."

"Ky," Testament interrupted him at last.  "I understand how it must frustrate you, but even if you chase Sol to the ends of the earth he may never tell you why he did it.  There's no point in endangering yourself for a truth that isn't there."

"But still…!"  Ky shook his head stubbornly.  "I don't need to know why.  No motive would ever excuse him—he abandoned us when we needed him the most, most likely for the sake of his damned pride.  But if I can't know the truth…I'll at least know how strong he is."  His eyes narrowed dangerously on the horizon as if he could see the man there, challenging him.  "He said I was weak.  That I had no business leading soldiers against demons like Justice.  Whatever his strength is, he risked all our lives and the peace of our world to keep it from me, and I won't be satisfied until I've seen it for myself.  Until he's recognized me as worthy of fighting me at his best."

A hand fell over the back of his knuckles, and he jumped slightly, torn from his thoughts.  It was then that he realized how tightly he had been gripping the rail; his knuckles were white and fingers trembling.

"That's enough," Testament said quietly, drawing his hand back. 

Slowly, Ky unwound his own hand, stretching it to relieve the tension in its joints.  He sighed.  "I'm sorry," he murmured.  "I'm getting carried away."  This time he leaned forward, folding his arms over the railing to steady him and avoid risking his hands again.  "But that's why I have to see him again.  Especially now…he's hiding something else from me, and I won't let him risk innocent lives for his selfish whims."

A long silence passed between the pair, and Ky felt the wind gradually beginning to rid the heated anger and injustice from him.  It left him feeling…raw, split open like a wound, to have admitted so much so openly to a Gear.  A Gear….  He sighed.  "Thank you for listening.  I know it must seem terribly foolish to you."

"Not really."  Testament turned his gaze forward as well.  "It was a time of war—many of us experienced betrayal and grief, from those…we thought we could depend on.  I'm sure even Johnny and Bridget would understand why you reacted that way, if you were to explain it to them."

Ky frowned, uneasiness settling in his stomach.  "Testament…I am sorry.  I shouldn't be going on about the war, when you…."  He licked his lips.  "I don't blame you, for whatever you might have—"

"Don't," Testament interrupted him.  "We already agreed not to hate each other; that's enough for me."

Ky relaxed, relieved; it hadn't been his intention to burden Testament with all his bitter memories and accusations.  "I'm glad," he murmured.  And then a little louder, "In any case, I appreciate you listening to my long-winded story.  It was good, to be able to tell someone."

"I understand."

Ky glanced behind him, catching a glimpse of the hatch they'd exited from.  "I think I'll be going to bed now.  It's…been a long day." 

Testament nodded vaguely.  "I think I'll stay a bit longer.  I'll try not to wake you when I come in."

Ky nodded back.   Before stepping away, however, he reached out, setting a hand over Testament's on the railing.  The Gear sent him a questioning gaze and he managed a faint smile in return, hoping that small gesture would be enough to convey his appreciation for all Testament's help that evening.  "Goodnight, then."

Testament stared at him, blinking, and turned his hand slightly to give Ky's a slight squeeze.  "Sleep well."

"Thank you."  At last Ky pulled back, hesitating only a moment more before turning to follow the rail back to the hull.  Though he was indeed exhausted, he suddenly felt clearer than he had in several days.  It had been years, probably, since he had told anyone about his history with Sol, and yet now he had found someone who not only accepted his explanations, but also understood.  As he reached the hatch that led inside he glanced back, watching Testament silently for a moment.  He really was an impressive figure, black leather against pale skin, every part of him perfectly proportioned and graceful—the kind of perfection that only a Gear possessed, and yet Ky wasn't as troubled by it now as he might have once been.

The officer smiled as he turned once more, letting himself in so he could seek peace for the night.

*****

When Bridget was finished telling his story to the other girls, not to mention receiving their reassurances, he made his way towards the room he shared.  His steps were hesitant and heavy; though he had seen Ky and Testament pass earlier no one knew where they were or what had passed between them.  If they were in the room talking, he dared not interrupt no matter his concern.  Even if he wasn't sure what Testament could offer in the way of comfort, he knew at the moment he could have done no better.  The confrontation had left him feeling uneasy, and he had no idea how to face Ky.  Especially since it had been his raised information that caused the fight….

"Ky…."  Bridget paused with his hand poised on the doorknob to their room.  Though he could hear no sound echoing back from the room he was still almost ill with worry, and for nearly a full minute he stood there motionless.  Something like this should not have affected him so deeply.  He was used to raised voices and turned backs—more importantly, Ky had not left.  There was no reason left for this uncertainty.

At last Bridget let himself inside, twisting the door open with slow caution.  With no response immediately following he peeked his head inside, and was filled with relief to find Ky in bed.  He crept, mouse-like, into the room.  "Ky…?"  When the man did not respond to his whispered greeting he was certain he was asleep, allowing him to approach closer for a good look.

Ky looked peaceful, more so than on the previous occasions Bridget had seen him, flopped on his stomach with one arm hanging easily off the edge of the bed.  His back had been bandaged and only his vest and armlets removed.  Bridget crouched beside him for some time, just watching his slow intake of breath, assuring himself that everything was well.  With a slight smile he gently urged the man's arm back to the mattress, tugged the blankets a little higher up his back.  And after a moment's contemplation he leaned forward, pressing a faint kiss to the man's cheek.  "Don't go anywhere, Ky."

Ky shifted slightly but did not wake, and, satisfied, Bridget pulled back to head for his own bunk.  He was a little concerned when he noticed Testament's bed was empty, and his heart skipped with the memories of their conversation the night before.  But the ship had taken flight just after everyone was aboard, and if Testament really had been the one to look after Ky there would not have been time for him to leave the ship as he'd stated.  Reassuring himself once more Bridget pulled himself up to his bunk, relieving himself only of his iron belt before wriggling beneath warm covers and falling asleep.

*****

Johnny felt like shit.  The events of the evening had taken their toll on him, and if anything was worse than that tension and uncertainty it was listening to May pace back and forth in front of the door to his room.  She'd been at it for a while now, probably working up the courage to ask him in person about what had happened in the city.  He felt both relieved and guilty that the stern expression he'd given her on the way in would probably keep her at bay for a while.  Maybe just long enough for him to come up with an explanation.

"What a mess." 

Johnny shed his hat and glasses, tossing them lightly onto the bed where he'd left his coat earlier.  He was just taking the tie out of his hair when the hall outside his door went abruptly silent.  He tensed, hands still tangled in strands of blonde as he waited for her to try the door.  It was times like these that he almost wished he'd invested in door locks.  When nearly a full minute passed he started to relax, but as he should have expected it was just then that the door opened a crack.  "Johnny…?"

Johnny sighed, sagging back in his chair.  "Come in," he called as he finished unwinding his hair from the band holding it.

He wasn't sure whether to be thankful or concerned when the girl who slipped inside was Dizzy and not May.  Softly she closed the door behind her.  "Are you all right?"

Johnny blinked at her; he hadn't been expecting a question like that right out.  "Yeah…"  He passed a hand back through his hair, rubbing at his scalp.  "Yeah, I'm all right."

Dizzy came forward slowly, her manner quiet and without accusation.  "May went back to her room."

"Did she?"  He relaxed a little.

"She was kind of shaken, though.  She said she's never seen you like this."

"Yeah, well, I'm not so thrilled with me, either."

Dizzy frowned slightly but continued forward nonetheless, stopping just in front of Johnny's chair.  He risked a glance at her face, feeling somewhat akin to a schoolboy about to be scolded.  But she was only watching him, lips arranged in a gentle, grim smile.  "Bridget told me everything."

"Is…"  Johnny snorted, leaning his elbow against his desk so he could rest his chin on it.  "Is the kid okay?"

"I think so.  Testament is looking after him."

"Huh, no kidding."

"Johnny."  Dizzy tilted her head to the side so she could better see him.  "Are you really all right?"

Johnny kept his gaze carefully trained away from her as he considered her question a bit more seriously this time.  "He told you everything, huh?" he said, his tone dropping a bit.  His eyes lost their focus as he replayed those short moments.  "You know…he wasn't completely wrong, that damn Ky.  There's a lot I haven't told him.  Any of you."

It hurt, deeper than he would have liked to admit, to confess such things to her.  To think that all these years, and May, who had more of a right to know than anyone, still knew so little….  "He could be right," Johnny continued vaguely.  "Maybe by not telling you all…I'm only putting you in danger."

Dizzy's hand alighted softly on the side of his face, and Johnny glanced up.  She was smiling, same as before, her eyes sincere.  Without a word she swiped her thumb along the tiny healing wound that crossed his temple—gained from the robots the day before.  A warm tingle spread through the flesh as it knit flawlessly together once more without leaving a scar.

"Everyone on this ship believes in you, Johnny," Dizzy assured, brushing back a few loose strands of his hair.  "And if there's something you haven't told us, we trust you to know what's best.  May more than anyone.  So don't worry about us; we trust you."

"Dizzy…."  Johnny sighed around a quiet smile, lifting his chin off his hand.  "Thanks, Mom," he teased.

Dizzy chuckled, moving around the side of his chair so she could stand closer.  It only took a subtle prodding and Johnny leaned forward, allowing her to draw him against her.  She wrapped an arm lightly around his broad shoulders to keep him close, as he finally was able to exhale the rest of his tensions out of him.

"April asked me to get a set of coordinates from you," Dizzy confessed.  "Where should I tell her we're going?"

"Home," Johnny replied without hesitation.  He smiled grimly as he closed his eyes.  "I think it's just about time we took these girls home."