-- CHAPTER THIRTEEN: Hiatus --

Disclaimers: Refer to Chapter One: Breathe

Author's Notes: It would make more sense, and have more meaning if you read 'Homecoming' -- but the gist of it is that the 'FLASHBACK' piece is from when Sara and Nick reconciled after a huge fight. It took place after Jamie, Nick's old flame, makes a surprised appearance at Michelle's wedding (Homecoming.)

~*~

- Five Months Later –

"Mom, Dad, tell me again why this place is so special," Jessie asked. Sitting atop a large boulder, she glanced down at her parents, sitting at the bottom of the rock edifice. In front of them was the large lake, Lake Texoma, reflecting the warm hues of the setting sun.

- FLASHBACK –

- Three Years Earlier –

Sara stood by the window, watching Nick and Jamie walk out into the yard. Her heart sank; she felt her chest tighten, as if being mechanically squeezed. 'Oh God it hurts,' she cursed herself. She hated being in love, she never admitted it to herself, but seeing Nick's reaction to Jaime just crushed her. This trip had been an eye opener for her, but she also knew that this might have made a greater impact on Nick. She was suffocating, she watched the couple exchange words and a hug, and she couldn't breathe. 'I need to get out of here,' her mind ordered.

Without hesitation, she grabbed the set of keys that sat on the night table and rushed out of the door. She galloped down the stairs and briefly looked for a friendly face, finding nobody; she quickly made her way outside towards the parked Tahoe. She drove for an hour, never quite knowing where to go, no sense of direction, just the general direction to get away from the Stokes Ranch. She headed north, to where the wind took her, finally, she ended up at the edge of Lake Texoma. She parked the Tahoe closely, and walked towards the lake's edge and sat by it, searching the ripples of water for something. She looked around the seemingly placid lake, and was amazed, she saw the beautiful glistening sun against its surface, taken aback by her surroundings.

~*~

Sara took off and he drove for hours, looking for her. Searching. He canvassed the local places that would have interested Sara, checking flight bookings to Las Vegas, local gas stations, and dreadfully checked the hospitals as well. Nothing. The day was wearing thin, and he knew that he had to find her, to tell her, he couldn't lose her. The sun was about to set, and he didn't know were to go, his mind just in shambles. He continued driving, 'north, maybe there's something there,' his mind convinced him. His journey continued, and it leaded him to the edge of the lake, he parked the truck by the lake, staring out onto the sun's reflection in the water. His mind was flooded by memories of the times he spent by this lake, contemplating life, thinking of love, escaping. 'God, it's been so long,' he thought, he watched the lake and hopped out of the truck, walking around it and onto the lake's edge.

He sat there; unmoving, silent, thinking. Staring out onto the distance.

~*~

She sat atop a rock, curled up, with arms hugging her knees and her face rested on her knees. Sara sat there, silent, thinking, looking out onto the still lake. She stayed still, feeling a cool breeze flow past her, her hair waving in the wind.

She stayed still, thinking. She felt his presence, knowing that it was Nick. A feeling of relief and at the same time, calmness came over her body.

~*~

Nick got up from his spot, wanting to walk around, to feel the sand between his toes. He walked around the lake's edge, taking in the scenery that still thrived. He saw someone familiar, and relief washed over his body. He walked closer to the woman who sat atop a rock, hair waving in the wind. He breathed, aware of the nervousness that claimed his body.

Slowly, he eased himself beside her, being silent and calm.

"I didn't mean to hurt you," he murmured. "It's just that, when Jamie left, I was lost for the longest time. Seeing her, just-" he continued, glancing at Sara's blank face. "Seeing her, closed that part of my life. It made my head at peace, knowing that after all these years, she was alright," Nick assured.

"She will always be a part of me, a part of my past. She helped me find myself when I was lost. I loved her – a long time ago, she was my guide, my compass, my home. But after she left, I lost myself, I ran away."

Sara stared at him, speechless.

"But you, helped me find myself again," Nick emphasized. "This trip made me realize the things that I missed, what I wanted and what mattered most," he paused, "you," he emphasized. "This trip helped me find my way home, helped me find my way to you," he breathed, waiting for a reaction.

Nothing, no words, no emotion.

"Well, I've said what I wanted to say, and I guess this is my cue to leave," Nick broke the silence, feeling dejected.

"Stay," Sara whispered, she finally broke free from her daze and looked up at him. He obeyed, sitting close to her, wanting to wrap his arms around her as the cool wind blew, but resisted the urge.

They watched the rest of the sunset in silence, words never needed to communicate what their heart held true. He stared into her warm eyes, speechless at this moment, having no words to pronounce. He reached his hand closer to her, holding her face in his hand, and turning it towards him. She looked at him, calmness and understanding plagued her eyes. She smiled, and allowed Nick to pull her closer. She gazed at his anticipating lips, hers tingling at the thought of kissing his. Nick never took his eyes of her, watching as she reacted to his actions, and happy that she didn't pull away. With ease and gentleness, he inched closer and closer, taking in her soft scent and warm breathe. Finally, he placed his lips against hers, letting the heat that seared through him to conform to her sweet, soft lips.

Fire.

She didn't hesitate, and allowed her lips to contact with his, they were soft, and the tingle in her lips intensified. Sara felt a soft smile curve from Nick's lips as both of them pulled apart. Their cheeks hot, and body warm and stinging. They both smiled at each other's cheeks, happy that the moment was as pleasing as they had hopped, even more. Sara slipped her hand into Nick's and held it as they sat quietly, never wanting to leave each other's company. There were no words that both wanted to share, silence was precious, and they reveled in it. Who needed words, when someone you loved shared a moment like this?

- END FLASHBACK –

"And that's the story of 'us' – right Nick?" Sara concluded.

"Yup. Then we got married and stumbled our way to you, little one," Nick smiled.

Jessie giggled, "this place is pretty. I like watching the sunset and I like being with you."

"We're glad to be here with you too," Sara whispered.

~*~

- SARA'S POV –

We sat in our seats, sandwiched between Nick and I, Jessie slept soundly. The sun was bright as I looked over the long stretch of desert plains below, the blue sky surrounding our window whilst fluffy cotton-like clouds hovered around the plane. Thousands of feet in the air, we were flying just above Northwest Texas, or so the pilot had mentioned. Texas, it was almost a second home to us; well after the lab, I guess you can say more like our third home. Five months after Jessie's diagnosis, we were weary of taking her away from the comforts of the doctors and facilities of Desert Palm. We are just returning from spending Thanksgiving with Nick's family home in Dallas.

Her health had deteriorated rapidly, and now she had grown so small and so fatigued by simple exercises. Most of our time was spent in the hospital, in attempts to easy her discomfort; both Nick and I cut down our hours. We worked our schedules around her, and once and while, people from work helped us out.

A week ago, Nick's family planned to come visit us, but instead, the doctors recommended that a change of scenery was probably in order. It saddened me to think that, considering Jessie's rapid deterioration, this was probably going to be our last vacation together as a family. I could not believe how tired I was, and how my heart accelerated each time Jessie coughed. She was so strong, even during the times when I struggled with my emotions.

"She got that from you," I heard Nick say. I raised an eyebrow to his comment. "She's as strong as you are," he clarified. To this day, it still amazed me that he knew how the wheels in my head turned, reading me like the John Grisham novel that he held in his hand.

"She's stubborn too; did she get that from me or you?" I asked lightheartedly. He looked at me, and I indicated towards Jessie's insistence on wearing a thin milkshake pink striped polo shirt, similar to her dad's navy blue polo shirt, despite Sara's insistence that the airplane's cool temperatures would make her uncomfortable. Encouraged by her father, the pair boarded the plane in polo shirts, only to ask for extra blankets after take-off.

Nick chuckled, wrapping the fleece blanket tighter around himself, "now wait a minute, it was a good idea at the time."

I couldn't help but giggle at Nick's expression, before wrapping another blanket around Jessie. For the hundredth time today, I stared at her sleeping face, only to be interrupted by Nick's low voice.

"Listen, Sara about Mia-" Nick began.

I rolled my eyes, "Nick, please don't ruin this moment."

"I'm sorry," he said.

"We'll talk about it later," I whispered, expressing my discomfort in the sudden change of topic.

"Just let me explain-"

"Excuses only ruin apologies," I said.

~*~

- Four Days Later –

"Jessie, we'll be late!" I yelled, "Jessica Stokes if you're not down here in the next 10 seconds Daddy and I are going to leave."

"Is she ready yet? We're going to miss the movie," Nick said as he entered the front door.

"I don't know, she ran up to get her sweater," I replied, turning to face him.

"I'll go check on her," he offered. I smiled and turned to sort through the mail that had accumulated throughout our absence.

"Sara!"

I froze at Nick's frigid voice; quickly, I dropped the stack of envelopes and jogged up the stairs. "What's wrong?"

"Call an ambulance," Nick directed while he carried Jessie's limp body out of the room and down the stairs.

~*~

"I'm sorry," the Dr. Redken began. "We've-"

"No, oh God, no," I mumbled, my heart paused shortly and my breath drew placidly. I dreaded this day; this was the end. This couldn't be the time, she was doing so well, this can't be.

Denial.

Nick exhaled, his voice strained, "and there's nothing more you can do?"

I looked up at him, unable to string together words; all I had to rely on was my eyes possibly communicating through a telepathic connection. Nick was visibly in shock, his eyes forming a moist surface. His hands were placed on his forehead, as if to brace himself from falling forward. Today was the day that both of us futilely prayed would not happen, in fact, we both had deferred thinking about this situation; we had both decided to cast our differences aside and become parents to our only daughter, but now we were lost. But it's too soon, this couldn't be. Slowly, I turned my attention to the doctor's response -- he shook his head, looking at us with what I can only describe as sympathy. He was trying to sound as professional as he can, trying hard to soften the harsh news. In his own cryptic words, I knew that he had done everything he could, and that if we were to prolong her life, we would in fact be hurting her.

Sobbing softly, I whispered, "and this is it?"

"I think that it would be best if you start gathering your family together," the doctor advised.

Oh God, our family. How are we going to tell them, tell them that their granddaughter, niece, and cousin was leaving? Our parents will be devastated; Nick's parents will wonder how just a little over a week ago, their granddaughter ran around in their backyard. My parents will question the situation's unfairness; they would ask questions I know not how to answer. How are we going to do this?

"Again, I'm sorry," the doctor apologized once more.

This was the end.

~*~

To Be Continued…

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A/N – John Grisham is John Grisham, I don't own him or his books.

I've decided to continue, for the sake of concluding 'this'. Tell me what you think, I'd love to hear from you. And here's some news, tell me if you really don't like it, I'd really love to get your insight. Flaming is not preferred, but 'constructive criticism' is more than welcome. - oceanwave