PART 4
The alarm clock stirs me from sleep, and i grunt and kick it off the side table, waking up to a splitting headache. Exactly how much did i drink last night? I roll over... to find a fully clothed Vaughn lying next to me, asleep. He's so gorgeous, and peaceful. I love it.
I'm plagued by a thought. A horrible dream where i came onto Vaughn. Well, not horrible because i did; i made a complete ass of myself. I shiver. Never.
Um, where the hell am i? Oh, yeah, London. With my 'husband'. He makes a small noise and rolls over. God, i must have been trashed. I cant remember leaving the damn plane. Never again. I will never drink again. Honestly.
I stumble up, and trip over my shoes 'Fuck!' Vaughn must have taken them off. Along with my jacket and sweater, which are on a chair opposite the bed. He stirs and grumbles as he comes awake. 'Morning, sleepyhead.'
He looks at me, puzzled, but shrugs 'How long you been up?'
'About two minutes' I grimace. 'Two very long, head splitting minutes. I think i'm going to hurl.' I look over to him, blinded by the sun, which makes me hurt even more. 'How much did i drink last night? I dont even remember getting here'
He looks suspicious 'You dont?'
'Nope. It's so wierd'
I figure i must look like a pathetic drunk, because he changes the subject. 'We're gonna have to figure out what we're going to do tomorrow. At the dinner'
'Well, i just have to be all devoted to you, right?' Which, y'know, will *not* be hard.
He smiles, but it fades 'Yeah'. He smiles, and i notice something. 'Did i hit you or something? Last night?'
'No, why?'
'You have, like, a bruise or something on your lips.' Flashes of my dream come back, i throw them off. 'I've been told i'm an extremely violent sleeper.' Great, now he'll think i'm a slut.
He takes it all in stride, but quietly says 'You must of, i guess' and moves towards the bathroom. 'I'm going to have a shower'
'Ok' i check my watch. 'I'm going to watch GMTV' He looks at me, amused. 'Morning show, me and Dixon watch it. In seperate rooms, obviously.'
He nods in affirmation, but checks 'You wanna go first, i dont mind.'
'Nah, i just, uh, need to pee.' Cant believe i didnt notice before.
****
My glass of Nurofen in my hand, Eamonn Holmes on the TV. Normal. I've noticed i'm unusually on edge this morning, like i am when i get close to... well, sex, but dont get it. Must have been the dream. Nothing else could explain it. Not even mass quantities of sparking between me and Vaughn could be responsible for that.
I look idly around the room, noticing something in the mirror. Approaching, i look for the source of the unease. And, i notice it.
On my right earlobe are teeth marks.
Last night comes flooding back. Vaughn against the wall... the feel of *him* on my body.
'Oh, no no no' I am such a stupid bitch. Now he's going to hate me. Making it worse is the fact that he is lying to me. Without cracking. S'pose i could just brush it under the carpet... i mean, he doesnt want to talk about it. Hmm...
The door opens, and any words i could have said are immediately silenced. He's wet, and clad in nothing by a towel. The hair is everywhere, and he looks over at me, concerned. 'You ok?'
Shit, i must have be drooling. 'Um, nothing.'
Idiot. 'Right. You want the shower?' He turns, revealing a couple of faint bruises on his back. God, i really must have thrown him at the wall... i know i'm violent, but, jeez!
His neck is faintly red from where i bit him last night, and, now that i'm fully concious, i notice he avoids looking right at me. Because he wanted it as well. I was smashed out of my skull on cheap booze and he wanted me as much as i wanted him. I always want something when i've been drinking.
My heart sinks. He'll think it meant nothing, that i was just some drunk, screwed up idiot. And he'll hate me if i sweep it away. I walk over to him, and lay a hand on his shoulder, and he moves sharply. Quietly, i try to form the words. 'I'm sorry.'
He looks shocked. 'You remember?'
'Yeah. I remember. And i'm sorry that i put you in that position last night.'
He looks hurt, and i know he must have taken it the wrong way. 'Heck, i was there. I shouldnt have... i took advantage of you'
Ok, the valiant knight stuff is sexy as hell, but, who the hell is he trying to kid? 'You didnt. I wanted you last night, and normally i dont take no for an answer. But, you said no, before we did something. Something that would have changed everything. No matter how much i like you, how much i want you, there are rules in play'
Didnt i say the opposite last night? Fuck, i dont know what to think anymore. He smiles faintly, but he hates this as much as i do. 'You want me?'
'Didnt i say that last night?' I did, right?
'Yeah, you did. Burned in my mind. Like everything else.'
I reach up to touch his face, but i stop at my bite on his neck. Softer, i inquire 'Did i hurt you?'
'No' He looks kinda ashamed. 'I liked it. Fitted all of last night perfectly.' He clears my hair behind my ear, admiring his handiwork. Things are getting close again, and my pulse is going up. Pulling back, he walks to his cases, looking for clothes. 'You should get a shower'
I dont remember everything i said to him, but the actions are burned into my mind. The way he tasted, the way he touched me, the way i wanted him to kiss me, to... do the things i wont ask him to do. Not yet.
I turn on the spray, and the bathroom smells like him. I pull off my shirt, wincing. I turn to look in the mirror. My back is bruised, just like his. Inside, i'm burning at the memory. Things i dont want to feel, the little tingle in my crotch - all the perfections of Vaughn.
I wont be able to forget him, will i? Tomorrow night, i have to be married to him. Which, sadly, leaves tonight free for chemistry and long silences.
Terrific...
The alarm clock stirs me from sleep, and i grunt and kick it off the side table, waking up to a splitting headache. Exactly how much did i drink last night? I roll over... to find a fully clothed Vaughn lying next to me, asleep. He's so gorgeous, and peaceful. I love it.
I'm plagued by a thought. A horrible dream where i came onto Vaughn. Well, not horrible because i did; i made a complete ass of myself. I shiver. Never.
Um, where the hell am i? Oh, yeah, London. With my 'husband'. He makes a small noise and rolls over. God, i must have been trashed. I cant remember leaving the damn plane. Never again. I will never drink again. Honestly.
I stumble up, and trip over my shoes 'Fuck!' Vaughn must have taken them off. Along with my jacket and sweater, which are on a chair opposite the bed. He stirs and grumbles as he comes awake. 'Morning, sleepyhead.'
He looks at me, puzzled, but shrugs 'How long you been up?'
'About two minutes' I grimace. 'Two very long, head splitting minutes. I think i'm going to hurl.' I look over to him, blinded by the sun, which makes me hurt even more. 'How much did i drink last night? I dont even remember getting here'
He looks suspicious 'You dont?'
'Nope. It's so wierd'
I figure i must look like a pathetic drunk, because he changes the subject. 'We're gonna have to figure out what we're going to do tomorrow. At the dinner'
'Well, i just have to be all devoted to you, right?' Which, y'know, will *not* be hard.
He smiles, but it fades 'Yeah'. He smiles, and i notice something. 'Did i hit you or something? Last night?'
'No, why?'
'You have, like, a bruise or something on your lips.' Flashes of my dream come back, i throw them off. 'I've been told i'm an extremely violent sleeper.' Great, now he'll think i'm a slut.
He takes it all in stride, but quietly says 'You must of, i guess' and moves towards the bathroom. 'I'm going to have a shower'
'Ok' i check my watch. 'I'm going to watch GMTV' He looks at me, amused. 'Morning show, me and Dixon watch it. In seperate rooms, obviously.'
He nods in affirmation, but checks 'You wanna go first, i dont mind.'
'Nah, i just, uh, need to pee.' Cant believe i didnt notice before.
****
My glass of Nurofen in my hand, Eamonn Holmes on the TV. Normal. I've noticed i'm unusually on edge this morning, like i am when i get close to... well, sex, but dont get it. Must have been the dream. Nothing else could explain it. Not even mass quantities of sparking between me and Vaughn could be responsible for that.
I look idly around the room, noticing something in the mirror. Approaching, i look for the source of the unease. And, i notice it.
On my right earlobe are teeth marks.
Last night comes flooding back. Vaughn against the wall... the feel of *him* on my body.
'Oh, no no no' I am such a stupid bitch. Now he's going to hate me. Making it worse is the fact that he is lying to me. Without cracking. S'pose i could just brush it under the carpet... i mean, he doesnt want to talk about it. Hmm...
The door opens, and any words i could have said are immediately silenced. He's wet, and clad in nothing by a towel. The hair is everywhere, and he looks over at me, concerned. 'You ok?'
Shit, i must have be drooling. 'Um, nothing.'
Idiot. 'Right. You want the shower?' He turns, revealing a couple of faint bruises on his back. God, i really must have thrown him at the wall... i know i'm violent, but, jeez!
His neck is faintly red from where i bit him last night, and, now that i'm fully concious, i notice he avoids looking right at me. Because he wanted it as well. I was smashed out of my skull on cheap booze and he wanted me as much as i wanted him. I always want something when i've been drinking.
My heart sinks. He'll think it meant nothing, that i was just some drunk, screwed up idiot. And he'll hate me if i sweep it away. I walk over to him, and lay a hand on his shoulder, and he moves sharply. Quietly, i try to form the words. 'I'm sorry.'
He looks shocked. 'You remember?'
'Yeah. I remember. And i'm sorry that i put you in that position last night.'
He looks hurt, and i know he must have taken it the wrong way. 'Heck, i was there. I shouldnt have... i took advantage of you'
Ok, the valiant knight stuff is sexy as hell, but, who the hell is he trying to kid? 'You didnt. I wanted you last night, and normally i dont take no for an answer. But, you said no, before we did something. Something that would have changed everything. No matter how much i like you, how much i want you, there are rules in play'
Didnt i say the opposite last night? Fuck, i dont know what to think anymore. He smiles faintly, but he hates this as much as i do. 'You want me?'
'Didnt i say that last night?' I did, right?
'Yeah, you did. Burned in my mind. Like everything else.'
I reach up to touch his face, but i stop at my bite on his neck. Softer, i inquire 'Did i hurt you?'
'No' He looks kinda ashamed. 'I liked it. Fitted all of last night perfectly.' He clears my hair behind my ear, admiring his handiwork. Things are getting close again, and my pulse is going up. Pulling back, he walks to his cases, looking for clothes. 'You should get a shower'
I dont remember everything i said to him, but the actions are burned into my mind. The way he tasted, the way he touched me, the way i wanted him to kiss me, to... do the things i wont ask him to do. Not yet.
I turn on the spray, and the bathroom smells like him. I pull off my shirt, wincing. I turn to look in the mirror. My back is bruised, just like his. Inside, i'm burning at the memory. Things i dont want to feel, the little tingle in my crotch - all the perfections of Vaughn.
I wont be able to forget him, will i? Tomorrow night, i have to be married to him. Which, sadly, leaves tonight free for chemistry and long silences.
Terrific...
