Arsenic and Suspenders
by Richan
Part seven in the Trick and Treats series. (This is written out of sequence, and is actually the tenth in the series. I have *big* plans for this series.)
Disclaimer: I don't own the boys. I own basically nothing. My refund checks goes towards new glasses, as I haven't had a new pair since 1997, and for a bite guard because I grind my teeth when I sleep.
Warnings: fluffy, but nothing really.
Spoilers: This won't make sense if you haven't read any of the previous stories in this universe.
Thanks to: everybody who reviewed The Trouble with Potters, and ...And Three Makes a Family! A wonderful stroke to the ego.
(Also, to Please-No-Slash: Why pick me? I don't write anything past R, and even then it mostly skirts the back edge of PG-13. Besides, there are other authors out there who have tons more reviews than I have where that statement would make a bigger impact. I write as I see fit, and I *like* slash. In my own novel that I am currently writing, there *is* homosexuality. Freud made a big deal of homosexuality in his own studies (beside the Oedipal and Electra complexes).
Besides, I can make slash appear in anything I've ever read, excepting small children's book - and you can't say that any of the HP books are meant for little kids (there are *tons* of adult situations in the later books) - and religious books. And please use a dictionary if you review. I'm not going to take you seriously if you can't spell.)
*clears throat* Sorry for that, but I had to get it off my chest.
Harry looked over at Severus, who was pouring through the most recent potions catalogue to have arrived at their house.
"Sev?"
Severus waved a hand at him, motioning for him to hush.
Harry slumped back into his chair. If he'd known he was going to be like this fifty years ago, he would have shot himself. Preferably with a nice memory loss potion. And somehow would have managed to keep it flowing through his veins as long as he lived.
Who knew that after seventy years of marriage, he and Severus would act like this?
Harry had almost fallen asleep - an easy thing to do this time and age - when he got the idea that they needed something to spice up their lives. Their children were grown and producing children of their own. And the only other living thing in the house at the moment, besides them, were the rats that Severus tested some of the more gruesome potions on when he did dabble in his art.
"Severus?" he asked as he climbed out of the chair. One of these days he'd remember to thank Hermione for taking him shopping for easy chairs - they were so easy to fall asleep in.
"Hm?" The potions master was still buried in the catalogue.
"How about I make some dinner and maybe then we could watch a movie?"
Black eyes glared over the top of the glossy paper. "It's not that old movie about the ladies killing off people... Arsenic and Suspenders, was it?"
Harry sighed. "No, I was thinking more along the lines of The Exorcist. It's the perfect movie for an in-home date."
"In-home date? Are you trying to rewrite the entire English language into something only Potters can understand?"
Harry growled. "And here I was thinking that we've got all this time together and we do nothing but sit and read. Forgive me if I wanted to spend a little romantic time with my husband, have a nice Italian dinner, and curl up with him and watch a good movie."
Severus looked after Harry as he stomped from the room. Even at almost ninety, he still strode with a smooth gait. And his arse wasn't all that bad looking even now. He put down the catalogue, mentally checking his place so he could order one of those chopping gadgets to see if they really did work, as arthritis was a bitch most mornings now.
He entered the kitchen to find Harry throwing pots around on the stove with his wand, even as he was halfway into the fridge.
"Harry?" He put a hand on his husband's shoulder, which stiffened at the contact. Severus stepped back as Harry looked at him and went over to the stove.
"How about we go down to the lake after dinner and watch the sunset?" Severus asked when the silence got to be too much for him. "We don't have many chances to watch one while we're at Hogwarts during the school year."
Harry's shoulders slumped, a sign that he was thinking about it.
"Very well," Harry said, stirring something into a pot. "But the next time you do something, I may just have to lace your food with arsenic myself."
