Title: Too-toos and Bulges

Note: I'm slow, I'm slow, I'm sorry! Not all of us can be as speedy and talented as melissarxy1 who, coincidently, this chappie is dedicated to since she's been on my back, lol. Enjoy all!

**************

He was alone in his room, and that was exactly the way he liked it.

He could hear them outside, running up and down the halls. There was a pause and then a growl, followed by several girls shrieking, some curses in French and several exclamations "ow".

Jono knew what they were doing out there. He had heard all about it from Illyana. And even if the little girl hadn't told him, he still would have been able to tell from the very loud surface emotions of everyone else.

He wondered how Meggan could stand it, always hearing all these other voices.

And then he realized. She could stand it because she could talk back to them. Meggan could stand it because she had a mouth.

Which was a lot more than Jono could say for himself.

He sighed, turning up the volume of his Bauhaus CD. He knew he was moping and engaging in pathetic self-pity, but he didn't care. He figured he had an excuse. After all, half of his chest and face had been blown off by the energy inside him, the energy that at this very moment was cooking his insides. He would never smile again, never be able to be completely bare without killing, never be able to sing again.

He thought of his girl back in London. Of what was left of her.

The newcomers had tried their best to draw him out. One by one they had filed in, smiling nervously. None of them had freaked out at having Jono talk to them inside their head, but all of them had regarded his bandages nervously. McCoy had tried long and hard to discover some way to repair his body, but to no avail. Their visits had gradually decreased and nearly stopped. Illyana was the only who saw him regularly, and Pete was the only one Jono could really stand.

Sure, Illyana was adorable, but he knew that part of the reason she kept coming back was because he was a freak, he entertained her. She constantly giggled whenever she felt him in her head and Jono thought she was laughing at him.

Pete was bearable. He had strong mental shields, thanks to some covert group no one knew about, so when Pete was around, it was quite. And Pete didn't give him any BS either. None of that "we'll fix everything soon" junk that McCoy and MacTaggerat so often spouted. Instead, Pete came to see what he was up to, insulted his taste in music and prodded him into going after one of the girls. When Jono asked him why he bothered to visit him, Pete would say it was because Jono was the only other Brit there, and REAL Brit, not fancy-pants Brit like Betsy and Brian.

Jono suspected that somewhere, deep down, Pete actually cared, but he wasn't going to ruin his reputation for him.

And now Pete had joined with the Americans, dressing up for Halloween in the middle of July. Part of Jono could understand it; after all, most of those living on Muir had never had Halloween and it served to lighten the mood. But it was ridiculous and childish and, worst of all, it was noisy.

**************

"Kitty? Open up, its mah," Rogue cried, leaning against her friend's door. Her eyes kept fluttering up and down the hallway nervously. "Open the door, dammit!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming," Kitty muttered on the other side. "Jeez, why are you so worked up-". The words fell dead on Kitty's lips as she opened the door and saw Rogue.

Standing there, hand on hip, was a very unhappy looking French courtesan, complete with a red and black corset, a red ruffled skirt, fishnets, black gloves and a large red feather decorating a luxurious up-do. Kitty burst out laughing.

"Who would have thought you could find such a great can-can girl outfit in Scotland?" Kitty giggled, pulling Rogue into the room. Meggan, who was lazily floating above her bed, looked over at Rogue with interest.

"Oh Rogue, you look great!!!" she exclaimed excitedly, zipping over to get a closer look with her wide eyes. She scowled. "Why are you so upset?"

"AH AM NAKED!!!!!" Rogue exclaimed, and a startled Meggan reeled backward and perched on the top of the bedroom's dresser, gazing at Rogue curiously. Kitty just started laughing more.

"Oh come on, Rogue," she managed through some giggles. "You're completely clothed!"

"Yeah," Meggan added, "if you were naked, you would not be wearing clothes. Right?"

"Yeah, well, ah FEEL naked," Rogue growled, landing on Kitty's bed with a heavy sigh. "Ah can't remember when ah had so much skin exposed." She peered nervously at Kitty. "Ah'm worried ah'll hurt someone."

Kitty gave the girl an encouraging smile. "You know, I thought maybe you might feel like that. Which is why I picked this up for you at the costume shop." She revealed a nude-colored body suit. "Wear this under your costume, it'll be just like wearing your colors."

Rogue managed a small smile. "Thanks, Kitty." Now that she didn't feel so exposed, she got a good look at her friend. Kitty was clad in an impossibly tight black leather cat suit that covered her from foot to toe. Lying next to Rogue on the bed was a whip, cat-o-nine tails style. "Wow," Rogue breathed. "You really got into this."

Kitty blushed a deep red as Meggan giggled from her perch. "Yeah, well, I couldn't let the boys win."

"That's not the ooooonly reason!" Meggan sing-songed, smiling wide.

Rogue looked up at the girl, smiling back. "What do you mean?"

Meggan, ignoring Kitty's pleas that she keep quiet, floated down close to Rogue. "Kitty wants to get Piotr's attention."

"Meggan!" groaned Kitty, collapsing back on the bed with the other two girls and face-palmed.

"Aw, its okay, Kit," Rogue grinned. "We all knew that anyway." The three dissolved into giggles and didn't notice someone picking the locked door to their bedroom until the door swung open and Remy pounced in.

"Grondement!" Remy exclaimed, smiling wide despite the fact that he was wearing a tight pink leotard, a pink too too and a sparkly tiara. "Wh' do ya not invite de Gambit to des megangue a triox?"

"Get out!" Rogue screamed, jumping up and slapping Remy playfully, pushing him out of the door. "Get out, you pervy swamp rat!!!"

Remy successfully banished from the room, Rogue fell back with the bewildered girls, giggling madly as they discussed Remy's outfit.

"Rogue," Kitty began playfully, "I know you threw him out, but your eyes didn't leave his.. ahem, BULGE the entire time."

Meggan dissolved into giggles as Rogue shrieked and attacked Kitty with a handy nearby pillow.

Remy stalked back to the boy's wing, holding his head high even as he adjusted his tiara. Pete was waiting for him, leaning against the wall and enjoying yet another cigarette.

"Well, Frenchie?" he asked, flicking the embers of the cig, "how are the girls?"

Remy grinned at him. "Goregous." Then a wicked smile came across his face. "De Kitty is lookin' specially good."

Pete snorted, and Remy noticed that his calm façade faltered for a moment. "Why would I bloody care?" "Come on, mon ami," Remy leered, "Nous tout sait que vous voulez le petit chat."

"Hey," Pete growled. "Foreign languages aint fair."

At that very moment, a bamf heralded the arrival of the one, the only Pirate Kurt. "Eile! Wir sind spät!" he cried, before disappearing as he teleported away.

"Bloody foreigners," Pete scowled, kicking out the stub of his cigarette as Piotr and Brian emerged from their shared room.

Piotr clearly had no idea what a Transformer was, and Pete doubted that Brian was much help. Piotr was armored up and wearing chrome roller skates and clothes that looked like they were made out of tin foil. He shrugged sheepishly at the raised eyebrows.

Brian, on the other hand, was a sight. He made possibly the ugliest woman ever. Betsy had obviously enjoyed helping him out with his costume as he wore one of her black dresses that was clearly too small for him. He was stumbling around in black high heels, and the only part of the costume he seemed okay with was the black and white wig fastened to his head.

Brian glared at the men snickering at him. "Oh, shut it, LeBeau. May I remind you which one of us is wearing a too too?"

"Cheap shot, mon ami."

"Comrade Wisdom," Piotr spoke up, "where is your costume? I do believe Meggan requested you to dress up as an M&M, da?"

"We don't eat M&M's in bloody Europe," Pete growled. "I was set up."

"Well Pete, frankly I don't care if the Queen of England put Meggan up to this. The fact remains that you must wear your costume," Brian huffed.

"Oh yah? Or wot?"

"Or I will sic a very disappointed and angry Meggan on you," Brian answer. "Now go."

"Alrigh'," Pete growled. "But this is only for Meg. Meet ya all there, right?"

**************

Later in the main room, the party was limping along to its closing. While much fuss has been made over Pete's blue M&M costume and Yana had been adorable in her angel outfit, there was only so much trick or treating that could be done when there were only two places to go for candy.

Meggan, who had transformed herself completely into Moira much to the woman's chagrin, pouted as she hovered next to Kurt. "Is this all Halloween is about?"

"Nyet, little Meggan," Piotr replied, "I do believe it is also about getting sick from candy and telling ghost stories."

Kitty instantly perked up. "Ghost stories! Yeah, that's exactly what we need!" She plopped down on the floor, Kurt, Meggan and Rogue all dutifully following. She placed Illyana in her lap, smiling as she smoothed down the little girl's blonde hair. Piotr and Brian sat down reluctantly and eventually Pete and Remy would join as well.

"Okay, guys," Kitty said, smiling, "it's time for one of Kitty's famous tales of horror."

Pete immediately snorted. "Bloody yanks."

**************

YEAH! A Kitty tale! For all of you who remember the bedtime stories that Kitty used to tell little Illyana, you know the next chapter will be good. *big smiles* . So keep reading! Oh, and Rahne WILL make an appearance soon, I promise!!!!