"If you ain't dirty, you ain't here to party!" Buffy sang along to the radio, as she got dressed.

She had plans to go to the bronze with the gang tonight and was excited about it. The music was so loud she didn't hear the banging on her door. Her mother walked in, looking not too pleased.

"Buffy, turn that down." She said.

"Okay mom." Buffy said.

"Your friends are downstairs waiting." Joyce said, backing out of the door and leaving Buffy to change.

~*~ Buffy sat, surrounded by the chatter of her friends. She envied their happiness, their love. She wished she could be so close to someone like Oz and Willow. They were the perfect example of the perfect couple. Sure they had their fights, like any normal couple would, but in the end they always were in each other's arms.

"Buff? You okay? You haven't said much." Xander said.

"Huh? Oh, yeah I'm fine." Buffy said.

"Sure?" Riley asked.

"Yeah thanks."

"Does it have to do with Angel coming back?" Anya asked.

"No, not really guys. I'm fine."

"Cause we're always here if you need to talk." Willow said.

"I'm fine okay. I just . . . Need some air." She said, walking out.

Buffy took a deep breath of the fresh air. She walked for a bit before reaching a bench. She decided to sit for a while; she needed to get away from her friends. She loved them, she did, but they just didn't know when to let something go.

"Buffy?"

She looked up to see Angel standing before her.

"Can I talk to you?" He asked.

"Sit." She said and moved over some.

"I'm really sorry about what happened before I left. I don't know what came over me Buffy, I just . . . I couldn't stop myself." Angel said. "I felt so guilty coming home, knowing how badly I hurt you. I just wanted to come back and apologize, make things better. I can't believe I did that to you."

"Me either Angel. It's not something that I can just forget. It haunts me everyday, I wake up and it haunts me. Do you know what that's like?" Buffy said.

"No, I don't."

"So please, just leave me alone Angel."

"I don't know if I can do that. Buffy I love you."

"How can you say such a thing after what you did?"

"I see." He said, standing. "Well, if that's the way it is."

"That's the way." She said.

"Then, goodbye for now Buffy Summers." He said and walked off, leaving Buffy alone in the darkness.

~*~

The Summers door opened to reveal what appeared to be empty house. Lazily, Buffy threw her bag onto the stairs and walked into the kitchen. She grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and headed upstairs to her room. She was on her way to her room when she heard something fall from her brother's room. Curious, and a bit scared, she slowly crept to the door. Opening to see what had fallen showed something she didn't want to see. It wasn't "what" had fell, more like "whom". Skye was on top of Spike on the floor, kissing him passionately. They both stopped and looked up at Buffy. She dropped her water and ran to her room, slamming the door shut. She heard Spike at her door and quickly locked it.

"Buffy, Buffy open up!" He yelled.

She picked up Mr. Gordo and started to cry. Why did she care so much for Spike? It was all happening so fast. She wasn't ready to feel this way. She heard him calling for her to open the door, but she ignored them. She put Mr. Gordo down on her bed and ran over to her window. She opened it and climbed out.

~*~

The streetlights lit Buffy's way as she walked the streets of Sunnydale all alone. She needed to get away from Spike, from her feelings for him. She had just turned onto a new street when she saw lights ahead. Being curious, she roamed down towards the house that they were coming from. As she came closer to it, she heard music as well. She found herself soon inside the house and looked around, recognizing many people from school. Passing through the sea of teenagers she made her way to the kitchen. There she saw Angel and a few of his friends drinking beer.

"Buffy!" He yells and makes his way over to her.

"Angel, hi. What's going on?" She asked.

"I'm having a party! Want a beer?" He said, taking one out of the fridge.

"Uh, I'll pass." She said.

"Whatever floats your boat." He said, opening it.

"And I think you should too." She said, taking it from him. "C'mon. Let me help you to your room."

"Will you be joining me?" He asked, smiling.

"No, I don't think I will." She said, taking his arm.

She helped him upstairs and down the hall to the last room on the left. She opened the door and took him over to the bed. He didn't let go of her, pulling her down with him instead.

"Angel, I have to go. Get some rest."

"Come play, you liked it before." He said, taking her waist.

"No . . . I didn't." She said.

"I promise you'll love it this time."

~*~

Buffy woke up the next morning feeling sore. When she sat up, she realized her head wasn't feeling too good either. She felt like a truck had run over her several times. Sleepily she stood up and headed downstairs. Her mother was in the kitchen making breakfast and Spike was sitting at the dining room table with Skye.

"Morning sweetie." Joyce said.

"Hi mom. Skye, you're here early." Buffy said, sitting across from the two at the dining room table.

"Buff, you look like you just got run over by a truck." Skye said. "No offense."

"That's how I feel. Somebody just shoot me." She said, resting her head on the edge of the table.

"If I had a gun." Nick said, walking into the room.

"Shut up." Buffy said.

"Hey, you were the one that said it. Mom, I'm going to Parker's today okay?" He yelled to his mom.

"Alright Nick. Be home by eleven though." She yelled back.

"Yep. Bye." He said and ran out.

Buffy listened to him start his car and drive off. She lifted her head up when she saw her mother coming into the room. She was carrying a plate of pancakes. She placed it down on the table and they each grabbed a few.

"They look delicious mom." She said, taking a bite. "Mmm."

"So Buffy, me and Spike were thinking of going for a picnic at lunch time, want to come?" Skye asked.

"No thanks. I . . . Have plans."

"Oh." Skye said. "What are you doing?"

"Um . . ." She couldn't say she was going with Xander, Willow or Oz; cause Skye would find out eventually it was a lie. "Angel. Me and Angel have plans."

"Angel? Angel O Connor?" Spike asked.

"Yeah, how do you know him?"

"Don't, just heard . . . His name around is all luv."

"Okay, well I feel kind of sick, I think I'm going to go lie down." Buffy said, standing.

"Are you sure? Do you want anything?" Her mother asked.

"No, I'll see you later Skye. Bye." She said and left.

~*K, I'm trying to finish this story. But you know, I tend to like start things and not finish them. So for now, I'm going to try and concentrate mainly on THIS one. Okay? Yeah, I'm getting worser (that's not a word, I know) every chapter, but meh. I'm kind of starting in on the whole Angel/Spike thing. Review *~