This section contains the only R rated portion of this fic and it is a short part almost at the end of the chapter.
….. ~*~ …..
Irina jumped when Jack stirred. He'd been still for so long, she'd almost dozed off.
"Laura?"
"I'm here, sweetheart."
"I knew I heard your voice."
"You always said you would find me anywhere." Irina leaned in to kiss him, her hand in his.
"I don't feel very good, honey."
"I'm not surprised. The doctor thinks you were run over by a truck. Your good friend Arvin Sloane set you up. Do you have any idea why?"
"No."
"I'm sure you will figure it out, Jack." She brushed a hand through his hair. "You've broken a few bones and you have a nice collection of bruises, but the doctor says you will live."
"That's encouraging. Where is Sydney?"
"She went home with her friend."
Jack nodded, then grimaced. "The Calfo's. That means the nanny quit."
"Why do you think that?"
Jack smiled wryly. "Mrs. Calfo would never take Sydney to her home without my permission unless there were extreme circumstances. There would be no reason for Sydney to go there if the nanny was at home."
"She could just be gone for the evening."
"The nanny didn't know I was back. She wasn't at the house when I got in from the airport. I also recall Sydney pulling me away from Miss Meadows to discuss a family matter." He shifted uncomfortably in the bed. "I'm sure she picked up her check today and handed in her resignation. That is the fifth nanny this year; a new record for Sydney."
"The Calfo's seem very nice and they really like Sydney. Why not leave her with them when you go out of town."
"I would hate to impose."
"I'm sure you could work something out."
He thought for a moment. "I suppose," he conceded. "A nice safe private boarding school would be better, but she knows it's what I want. She can be very stubborn at times. She is so much like you."
"I don't see that in her, Jack. She is very much her father's daughter; her emotions run deep. She hides her feelings behind a wall of anger. You always liked to hide yours behind that granite mask. "
"I do not do that."
"You most certainly do." She ran a hand through her hair. "I say it with much love, but it is the truth. Like father, like daughter."
He let out a deep breath. "I'm not a very good father to her, Laura. I try, but everything I do goes wrong."
"Why did you tell her you were in a skiing accident? You couldn't think of anything less sympathetic if you tried."
"She would ask too many questions. Dangerous questions. This way, no explanations are required."
"I see. You are protecting her because you love her. It must be very hard to hurt her that way, knowing you can never tell her the truth. Knowing that she will never truly know the sacrifices you made for her." Irina swallowed back the tears. "She loves you, Jack. I could see it in her eyes when she looked for you from the stage and later, as we waited for the paramedics. Deep down, she knows you love her, too."
"I wish I could be sure of that. What kind of father has to manipulate his daughter to get her to spend time with him? Francie loves doing things with her father and Sydney is always so happy to go along with them."
"You're jealous of Francie's relationship with her father?"
"Not exactly. I just wish Sydney would be as willing to do things with me as she is with Francie and her father. She's going with me to the Mozart festival, but only because she's afraid I'll ask another woman."
"You were going to ask that…woman…out?"
"No. She looked like a two-bit whore. I'm not that desperate." He tried to sit up, grimacing as a wave of pain kept him down. "I saw Sydney coming back and, well, she's always reacted that way whenever I've tried to date, so I used the situation to my advantage."
"You have dated other women?" Irina couldn't keep the jealousy out of her voice.
"Correction. I've tried to date other woman. It has never worked out. They weren't you. Sydney was a handful, too. You would have thought her a sickly child considering the number of ailments she would develop when I asked a woman out."
"Well, that's a good sign, Jack. She's jealous of your attention."
"I wish that were true. No, she's afraid that someone will try to supplant you. She idolizes you. You were the perfect mother."
"Well, I can't argue with the truth."
Jack gave her a pained grimace. "I wonder how Sydney would feel if she knew she was really just another part of your job."
Irina reeled from the unexpected blow. "Don't you eversay such a thing again, Jack Bristow. I love our daughter. More than you will ever know. I love you, too. Don't you ever forget that! Remember that song you used to sing to me?" Her voice shook with the strength of her anger. "Until the twelfth of never," she quoted.
"That was such a corny song, Laura, and too idealistic."
"Maybe, but I meant it. Every word, Jack."
"Hold me close, never let me go…" Jack sang softly. Irina brushed away the tears she couldn't hold back.
"…hold me close, melt my heart like April snow," she finished, her voice catching as she sang the words. "I'll love you 'til the bluebells forget to bloom. I'll love you 'til the clover has lost its perfume and I'll love you 'til the poets run out of rhyme. Until the twelfth of never and that's a long, long time."
Jack sighed, his hand reaching for hers. "I like this dream. How many times have I longed to hear you sing that with me again? I can feel your hand in mine. The smell of your perfume, it's so real I almost believe I'm not hallucinating." He brought her hand to his lips, lightly kissing her fingertips. "I love you so much. I should hate you for what you did. I wantto hate you for what you did, but every time I try, all I can see is the way you would look at me when I came home from a long trip. Your eyes would tell me that you loved me; that you needed me. I want so much for that to be the truth. The real truth, Laura."
Irina leaned in to kiss him, her lips brushing against his neck before moving along his jaw until, feather light, she captured his lips in hers. "That is the real truth, Jack. I still need you. Every night I dream of you, pretending you are holding me tight in your arms. I hate the morning sun, because every time I wake up to it you are gone."
"I have the same dream, Laura, every damn night for the past ten years. Nothing I did would make it go away. God, I'm pathetic."
"I guess we both are." She placed more kisses along his face, her hand still folded in his.
"I want you, Laura." He motioned to his groin and she could see the evidence of his desire, undimmed by the pain medication. "I need to feel your body around mine. I need to feel you touching me."
"I…"
"Please?" he begged. Her hand reached for him, but he pushed it away. "Not with your hand. I can do that anytime. I need to be inside you."
"Jack, you're injured."
His eyes pleaded with hers. "Very well. Let me lock the door. I'm pretty sure this isn't on your doctors approved list of activities."
"I'm sure that whatever the hell this medication is doing to my mind isn't on his approved list, either, but I'm going to enjoy it while it lasts." He watched as she stripped out of her skirt and panties. "I would love to help, but my body seems to be glued to this bed."
"That's okay, darling. Let me take care of you." Irina turned off the heart monitor before pulling down the sheets. It wouldn't do to have an increased heart rate draw the attention of the late night medical staff. She sighed happily as the discarded sheet revealed his desire. "Looks like big boy is ready to go."
"Wait. What about you?"
"I've been ready all evening, sweetie." She climbed on the bed and slowly lowered herself on to him, squeezing her inner muscles around him. "That feels so good."
"You have to do more than that, Laura." Jack made a weak attempt to thrust up against her. "My legs feel like they are made of lead."
She began a slow undulation, her body pressed against his, careful not to put too much pressure on his ribcage. Jack moaned softly, his hands tightly gripping hers. "Faster, baby, faster. Ohmygod. It's been too long. I don't think I can hold back."
She rocked her body, enjoying the feel of his skin against hers. Her lips rained kisses upon his body, drinking in the scent of him. His hands reached for her, pulling her closer.
Jack moaned, muttering incoherent words of love. She felt the tension building in her own body as Jack strained against his own release. "Let go, Jack, let go. I'm almost there with you." She felt the warmth of his semen flood through her and soon found her own release. As her breathing slowed, she relaxed above him, her hands still clasped in his. "You're going to regret this in a few hours."
"I don't think I can ever regret making love to you." His eyes closed and within moments a soft snore told her he was asleep.
Reluctantly she moved from him and cleaned up the evidence of their activities. "So much for not doing anything foolish," she whispered to herself. With a final kiss, she turned the heart monitor back on and left the room.
