DISCLAIMER: Joss owns them.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I've been sick and really tired lately, so it's only a short update, because I know a lot of you have been looking forward to the Spike scene, and I didn't want to make you wait. Those of you asking for Liam angst… I don't foresee a lot of it. Maybe a nightmare in later chapters, but I see Angel as having been an extremely cheerful little boy. I feel like it wasn't until he got old enough that his father's expectations and disappointment affected him. The way I see it, at age four, Liam was very much so a momma's boy, very cheerful, and in worshipful awe of his father. That's the Liam you see here. Think giddy Angel… we haven't seen him much, but we know he's there. So, broody Liam you will see, little boy scared Liam you will see, missing home Liam, you might see, but traumatic childhood Liam, you probably will not. I don't see it in Angel's character, and therefore, I can't really write it.
THROWBACK: CHAPTER ELEVEN
Spike stared at the two children in front of him.
The dark haired little girl had her left hand slung casually into the back pocket of her jeans, and he couldn't help but notice the bright pink flowers stitched on the pant leg. Her stance was confident, her eyes curious, and though she had a soft smile around the corner of her lips, her eyes were guarded and wary.
The little boy's forehead was knotted up in concentration as he stared at Spike, a dark look settling over his face.
"You're the dead thing, huh?" The girl said, her smile widening a little, as she leaned in to get a good look at him. Somehow, she'd thought he'd look at little more dead and a little less pretty.
"Dead and British," the little boy said, still deep in thought, his little forehead wrinkled.
"Who the bloody hell are you two ankle biters?" Spike asked. "And where's my blood?"
"He wants his sodding blood," Faith said, mischief sparkling in her eyes. She poked Liam in the side.
Liam was still staring at Spike. "He doesn't look dead," he said, his little boy eyes wide.
Faith arched an eyebrow. "I don't know," Faith said. "His hair is pretty damn white. He could be dead." Faith watched him out of the corner of her eye, to see if he would scold her for using a curse word. After all, he was British, and the only other British person Faith had ever met was Wes, and Wes scolded her all the time.
Faith wasn't sure, but she thought that maybe that was because she was Wesley's girl.
Spike, chained up in the bathtub, stared at the child, trying to keep the smile that kept wanting to creep up off of his face at her fierce little expression.
He rolled his eyes instead. "I made my hair this way on purpose," he said, "and yes, I do want my sodding blood."
The children stared up at him, saying nothing.
"Why do you want blood?" Liam asked, curiously. "Are you going to paint something with it?"
Spike stared at him incredulously. "No," he said dryly.
"Are you going to throw it at someone?" Faith asked. That sounded like fun.
"No," Spike said, amused and really not wanting to be. The hairs on the back of Faith's head stood up, and she narrowed her eyes at Spike. Something about him didn't feel right, but something about him felt nice, too.
"Are you going to wench someone with it?" Liam asked, his eyes wide.
"Wench someone?" Spike asked. "How exactly do you wench someone?"
Faith raised an eyebrow at him in a very adult way. "You know," she said. "You wench them. Or maybe you'd wanker them." Faith pondered that for a moment.
"Wanker," Liam said, remembering the new word and how much fun it was to say. "Ohhhhhhhhhhhh…."
Faith grinned, knowing exactly what was coming.
"This is the wanker song," Liam sang. "It's a song about wankers. And wenches. And sheep with crossbows. Wanker, wanker wanker. Wench, wench, wench."
When Liam started up the second verse, Faith joined in. "Ohhhhhhhhhh…" they both sang together, keeping their voices low enough that the adults outside in the living room didn't hear them.
It was then that Spike realized what it was exactly that had been bothering him about these children. They smelled familiar. The little boy smelled like family. He smelled like Angel.
As he stared at the children, trying to wrap his mind around the fact that there was a distinct chance that the little boy was his grandsire, Spike caught himself humming the tune under his breath.
Faith, bored with the song, ventured toward the end of the shower that had the faucet. Still singing under her breath, she leaned in and turned it on. Ice cold water streamed out of the shower head, hitting Spike in the face.
He sputtered through the water.
"Turn that off," he growled.
Faith stood, frozen to the ground.
"Mommy?" Faith whispered. She wasn't sure whether she wanted Mommy to wake up or not. Sometimes Mommy was angry when she woke up, but Faith was fast most of the time, and if she could just be good enough, Mommy wouldn't be angry any more.
"Mommy," she said again, tentatively.
Why was Mommy asleep in the bathtub? There was water. So much water. Red water.
"Mommy?"
"Faith, he looks awfully funny wet, huh?" Liam said. Spike was drenched and grimacing underneath all of the water that was hitting him.
"Hey Faith?" Liam said again, trying to get her attention.
The little girl didn't respond.
Liam came to stand beside her, and he leaned in and turned the water off. Spike opened his mouth to yell out the indignity of being chained up in a bathtub and teased by small children, but something in Faith's expression stopped him.
"You okay, Platelet?" he asked, sounding concerned despite himself and having no idea where the casual term of endearment came from.
Faith looked at him. "Why was Mommy sleeping in the bathtub?" she asked.
For a moment the room was silent, and in the silence, Spike panicked. "How bout we sing again?" he asked, not even realizing that he was giving in to the pull he felt toward the children.
Liam stood next to Faith and put his hand in hers. He didn't say anything, but silently, he told her that it would be all right.
"I'll start," Spike continued awkwardly. "Ohhhhhhhh…" He paused for a moment, wondering exactly what to sing. "Bloody helllllll…" he dragged the word out, and the two children looked at him. They seemed to have a thing for curse words. "This is a song about the Big Bad," Spike sang.
"Was he big and bad?" Liam asked, breaking into the song. "And were there sheep? With glaives?"
"Or pudding?" Faith whispered, her voice barely audible.
Spike shrugged, deciding that the children were at least as entertaining as Passions. He continued singing, and before he knew it, both children had climbed into the bathtub and up onto his lap.
"So," Cordelia said, still trying at conversation. "How's the new boyfriend?" She paused a moment, and Buffy and Giles said nothing, still staring at her. Cordelia persevered. "I hear he's not, you know…" Cordy trailed off, and she brought her index fingers up next to her mouth and made a face, using her fingers as two ridiculously large fangs.
"No," Buffy said, clearly wishing Cordy would stop trying to make conversation.
"Well that's good," Cordy said brightly. "You're alive, and he's alive, and you're both…"
She trailed off.
"Alive?" Giles supplied dryly.
Cordelia shrugged. "I was going to go with shockingly abnormal in a J. Crew kind of way, but…" she trailed off, ready to kill Wes for leaving her here alone. She wasn't the person they thought she was anymore, but somehow, every time she opened her mouth, Queen C took control of her tongue.
"It's like a vicious tongue demon," Cordy muttered under her breath.
Giles and Buffy looked at her, clearly clueless.
"Evil puppy," Cordy said suddenly, snapping her fingers. "Oh, not good, evil puppy." She looked around. "Where'd Liam and Faith go?"
"The consistent answer to that question is somewhere they're not supposed to," Wes said, entering the room and rubbing his temples slightly.
"Spike," everyone in the room said at once.
They raced for the bathroom. Buffy flung open the door, ready to tear Spike's arms off and beat him with them if he'd hurt Angel Version 4.0.
Buffy stopped in her tracks the moment her eyes saw the scene. It took a minute for it all to penetrate her brain.
Faith and Liam were sitting in Spike's lap, completely disregarding the chains with the innocent acceptance of small children, and Spike appeared to be telling them a story.
"And then," Spike said, his voice animated, "the prince and the princess ate the knight, and they all lived happily ever after. With blood."
"Yay!" Faith and Liam said together, clapping their hands and looking adoringly at the bleach blond vampire.
Cordelia groaned, as if Liam and Faith weren't violent enough already. They so didn't need stories about eating people. She could already see the frequency of their stabbing activity skyrocketing.
"Out," Wes told Faith and Liam sternly.
"But Mr. Spike was going to play Big Bad with us," Liam said, wheedling.
Buffy stared at Spike incredulously. Spike, still sopping wet, tried to look evil, but failed miserably.
"I want the two of you out of that tub and in the living room now," Wes said. The children didn't move, and Wes raised one eyebrow at them in warning. Quickly, the climbed off of Spike's lap and out of the tub.
Giles looked at Wes, impressed. He'd been under the impression that no one could control the Destructive Duo.
"Can we come back to visit Mr. Spike later?" Liam asked, having taking an incredible liking to the blond vampire.
Faith looked up at Buffy and grinned. "You're right," she told Spike. "She does look like a little blonde Happy Meal with legs."
Wes bent down and swooped Faith into his arms, ready to put his face next to hers and scold her in a way that made it quite clear that he wasn't pleased with her behavior.
Beneath his touch, she shivered, and as soon as he held her in his arms, she snuggled up against her body. Her little heart was still racing. Wes looked at Spike. He could sense that something had shaken Faith and shaken her badly. Almost unconsciously, he hugged the child. His girl.
"If you hurt her- hurt them," he said softly, his voice dangerous, "I will kill you."
"I didn't touch her," Spike said. "I'm not the one who hurt her, and unless your head is planted firmly up your ass, you damn well know it."
Cordelia cleared her throat and gave Spike a very pointed look. He rolled his eyes.
"Unless your head is planted firmly up your rear end, you darn well know it," he corrected himself.
Cordelia nodded, satisfied. No one used language like that around the kiddos on her watch.
Wes looked at Faith and then at Liam. Liam groaned. He knew that face. That was lecture face. Liam squirmed just looking at it, hoping that Wes didn't decide to make good on his perennial thrashing promise.
Faith placed her hand flat on Wesley's cheek, and her other hand crept into her mouth again.
"Mommy was asleep in the bathtub," she whispered.
"What?" Buffy asked, something like alarm entering her voice. Faith buried her head in Wesley's arm.
"Go away," she said, her words muffled through Wesley's sleeve. "Why don't you all just go away."
Wanting to fill the awkward silence that followed, Liam tugged on Buffy's shirt. "Do you know the Wanker Song?" he asked.
All of the adults in the room looked at the vampire chained up in the bathtub. Like many things in life, they were convinced that somehow, this was entirely Spike's fault.
Kate hung up her phone. The officers she'd sent by Angel Investigations had reported back that there was no one in residence, and that the investigations agency itself had been temporarily shut down.
"Angel," she murmured, under her breath, "what are you up to?" She knew he was connected with the murderer they were looking for: a woman from Sunnydale, who answered to the name of Faith.
"I think that you and I may be looking for the same thing," a voice said smoothly, causing her to look up.
She narrowed her eyes at the handsome man who stood before her. He was a lawyer. She didn't trust lawyers. He worked for Wolfram and Hart, and that made things that much worse.
More than anything else, he was a man, and Kate Lockley did not trust men.
As Lindsey prepared to pump the detective for information about Angel's whereabouts, and that of the assassin slayer he'd sent after Angel, he pushed back the words that were pumping through his head along with the beat of his heart.
Are you a good man?
By the time Wesley and Cordelia had gotten the kids settled in the living room, and Giles had gotten Spike settled in the bathtub with his blood, Buffy was starting to have second thoughts about what she'd just volunteered to do.
Baby-sitting couldn't be that hard, could it?
As the thought passed through her brain, a flesh colored streak ran by her.
"What was that?" Buffy asked.
Giles took off his glasses and began cleaning them. "I believe that was Liam," he said. Then he gestured to the chair Liam had previously been sitting in. "And I believe those are Liam's clothes."
Cordelia smiled brightly, trying to look for a way to make the situation less awkward as Wes chased after Liam.
"Did we mention he's a streaker?"
TBC… Buffy gets babysitting duty, and Xander, Anya, Willow, and Riley help out. Later, preschool, and the Scoobies begin to realize what makes Faith tick. More Spike, more Wes and Cordy moments with the kiddos, and Kate and Lindsey make their way to Sunnydale.
PLEASE REVIEW!!!
And if you like stories with small children, please check out my story, Small Packages, which features Faith's three year old daughter, and a preschool full of little slayers.
