The Real Big Brainy
by Gary D. Snyder
Part 2:
Mondays at Lindbergh Elementary School were rarely a surprise, but today's class was an exception. In addition to the usual assembly of students in Jimmy's classroom there was a new boy that Miss Fowl wasted no time in introducing.
"Students, I kno-o-ow how disappointed you all were when our foreign exchange student Bolbi left last month," she squawked, "so I'm sure you're all as exci-i-ited as I am to meet our new exchange student. Please welcome Jacques Fromage from Brie, France. He's here to participate in our – bra-a-awk - Science Fair this week."
Jacques was taller than average, with light brown hair that was very nearly blond, hazel eyes, and an easy smile. "Good morning," he said in very good English but with a very noticeable French accent. "I am very happy to meet you all and hope for all of us to become very good friends."
"Right back at you," murmured Cindy just loud enough for Jimmy to hear.
"Word that," agreed Libby. "Oh, yeah."
Jacques must have heard them for he gave them both an almost embarrassed but thoroughly charming smile that lasted until Miss Fowl had directed him to his seat behind Libby. As close as his desk was to theirs Jimmy couldn't help but notice that both girls seemed very pleased with the seating arrangements. Girls, he thought in uncharacteristically vehement disdain as both Cindy and Libby spent several minutes introducing themselves, welcoming him to the desk, class, school, city, country, and continent, and offering to personally show him around any time he wanted.
After the social pleasantries had finally ended the class settled into its normal routine. Because it was Monday the first order of business was Show and Tell, and one by one the students presented items of personal interest to the rest of the class. When Jimmy's turn came he produced a small projection device resembling a pocket flashlight and launched into his carefully prepared presentation.
"Today," he began, lowering the projection screen and dimming the classroom lights, "I have some follow-up slides to the those I presented last month when I photographed deep sky objects in the vicinity of the Lesser Magellanic Clouds in the Southern Hemisphere. Now prepare yourselves for a treat as I show to you the first known visual image of a genuine and verified black hole!" With that he activated his projector, illuminating the screen with his photograph.
It was, unfortunately, totally black.
"Uh, Jimmy?" Sheen ventured. "I think maybe you forgot to use a flash, or something."
"Well, I did use a flash", Jimmy admitted, "but I guess I miscalculated the proximity of the event horizon. I thought at least some of the photons would have made it back." As the students stirred restlessly Jimmy hastily added, "But it's still okay. If you look carefully, you can see the halo of high-energy particles around the singularity as particles are hyperaccelerated into the gravity well…if you scan the X-ray to cosmic ray region of the electromagnetic spectrum," he concluded somewhat weakly.
Nick yawned. "This is boring, Neutron. Let's get on to something else."
"But –" Jimmy tried to say.
"Yes, Jimmy, move along," Miss Fowl interrupted, turning the class lights back up. "Let someone else have their turn."
Defeated, Jimmy trudged disconsolately back to his desk. "No one appreciates real science," he muttered to himself.
The rest of Show and Tell went on rather predictably, with Sheen discussing yet another of his Ultra Lord collectibles, Carl discussing his favorite "My Lovely Llama" storybook, and Nick abstaining. To everyone's surprise, however, Jacques took a turn, passing out a small box to Miss Fowl and each student before proceeding to the front of the class and beginning his talk.
"My American friends", he began, "I would like to present each of you with a small token of appreciation for having me here as your guest. If you open your boxes you will find inside a piece of moldavite for each of you." Although Jimmy knew what moldavite was no one else in the class did, and everyone opened their boxes with a great deal of curiosity. Inside each box on a piece of cotton lay a small green stone.
"It looks like a broken piece of glass," said Carl.
"Carl!" Miss Fowl reprimanded. "Mind your manners!"
"No, no, Miss Fowl," Jacques reassured her. "He is quite right. It is a piece of glass. But, my friends, it is not ordinary glass. No human hand created it. Millions of years ago a great meteor streaked across the sky and landed in the region now know as Moldavia in the Czech Republic. The great heat of the impact fused the sand of a river there into the green glass you now see before you. They are children of the Universe, born when a piece of Heaven itself touched the Earth."
The students looked at the tiny green stones with new wonder and interest.
"How poetic," said Libby, entranced.
"And romantic," sighed Cindy, gazing at Jacques with open admiration.
Typical, thought Jimmy. Leave it to girls to be impressed with this sort of thing. But no guy would ever be taken in by some pretty or shiny bauble when science -
"They're so pretty," gushed Carl, interrupting Jimmy's thoughts.
"And shiny!" exclaimed Sheen. "They're just like the energy crystals RoboFiend tried to steal in Episode 246!"
Even Nick had something to say. "Pretty cool, Jack," he complimented. "These are the best science Show and Tell things I've ever seen."
Jimmy sat in stunned silence, his mouth hanging open. He had given the class a glimpse of the real wonders of the universe, and they were fawning over pieces of glass?
***
Author's Notes:
And so the conflict begins. Some of you may have noticed that Jacques name in French literally means Jack Cheese, which seems an appropriate name for someone from Brie. I tend to throw in these sort of inside jokes in most of what I write.
For those of you who are interested, there really are such things as moldavites. They belong to a class of objects known as tektites that are molten debris formed when meteors strike the earth. Most tektites are just molten pieces of ordinary rock or metal, but some few like moldavites can be cut and polished like gems. While completely terrestrial in composition and origin, I think that the link they have to the cosmos "out there" makes them fascinating and a good way for Jacques to legitimately upstage Jimmy.
