~*~*~*~*~ Author notes: I would just like to remind you that I really do
hate Hamtaro! That soft and fuzzy first chapter is just a warm up. Trust
me. Here's the real bashing. Oh yeah and this is rated R for a reason
remember. ~*~*~*~*~
Chapter Two: A Ham-Ham day.
Laura left of school with Kana as always. While Laura's dad headed off to work. Her mother stayed home. Hamtaro still in his kimono saw his chance.
Hamtaro: It's Showtime at the clubhouse!
And with that Hamtaro did his little down the pipeline routine only this time at the end; a crack in the pipe hooked the back of his kimono. Chocking Hamtaro nearly to death! He clawed at it and was freed. Leaving a minor rip in it. He fell all the way down. And landed in Brandy's shit!
Hamtaro: Eew this is gross. (Wipes off the crap) Oh man today I should have stayed in may cage. But I want to the others to see my kimono. Brandy! Brandy!
Hamtaro called but the old dog never came. He wondered where he could have gone but headed down to the clubhouse making that stupid bada bada noise. He arrived just as the other were having lunch. Boss smelled him coming.
Boss: Damn Hamtaro who fucked you!
Sandy: Boss! Watch you language around Penelope! Please.
Boss: yeah, yeah whatever.
Hamtaro: No one didn't do anything to me; I just had a bad fall.
Boss: A shitty fall you mean.
Sandy: Boss!
Boss: anyway you know where the bathroom is. Go clean. Can't have you stinky up the place. We already have Oxnard doing that.
Boss glance at Oxnard. Which made the poor hamster blushed. Was it his fault he was a queer and the only ham-ham to even look his way twice was hamtaro? Which is why he liked him so much. It didn't matter though cause Hamtaro liked Sandy and Bijou liked Hamtaro. Sandy didn't like anyone cause she was an independent ham-ham. Just then Oxnard let out a fart one that blasted throughout the room. Boss jeered.
Boss: God damnit Oxnard get the fuck out of here! 'Fore you blow the place up. I don't wanna die of toxic shock!
Cappy and Panda took their cue and threw Oxnard outside. Sandy and the other girls sighed. Hamtaro went to the bathroom to freshen up. He cleaned his new kimono as best he could. Laura would still notices he just knew it. The smell hadn't died down by the time Hamtaro entered the living room again.
Boss: No more burnt tacos for that fat bustard! I mean it.
Howdy: Yeah he stinky more then a pack of old dog hairs. (Chuckles at his own joke.)
Dexter: yet another by joke by Howdy. The buck toothed loser!
Howdy: Shut the hell up. You fucking dork. At less I don't need no glasses.
Dexter: I know you need a life and a grammar book!
Well that started a big fight immediately. Howdy with after Dexter like a cat. Dexter bit down on Howdy's arm. Howdy punch Dexter glasses off while Dexter then started chocking Howdy with his own apron. Howdy kicked Dexter in the nuts. Both rolled around the floor with each other.
With all the other ham-hams jeering them on. Sandy had been left with Penelope. She didn't know why she hung out with all those losers. She just did. She saw Oxnard by the river edge looking at himself. Tears were running down his fat ugly face.
Sandy: Oxnard what's wrong? Why are you crying?
Oxnard: No body likes me Sandy. I'm fat and ugly and I'm a fag!
Oxnard busted into tears. 'What a faggot!' Sandy thought as she rolled her eyes. She sat by the poor gay ass hamster anyway and found it fun to comfort him.
Sandy: who said you were a faggot Oxnard?
Oxnard: Stan your brother Stan and Maxwell. They both did.
Sandy: well I'm sure you not one so it's ok. So stop crying. Ok?
Oxnard: But I am a faggot. I'm in love with Hamtaro! He the only one that showed me kindness and share sunflowers seeds with me. Besides he has a nice ass! . Oh my god! I checked out his ass. See I am a fag.
Sandy: well umm ok. so like when did you first get these feelings for Hamtaro?
Oxnard: six months ago! I can't tell him cause.
Oxnard had to stop right there. If her told sandy that Hamtaro had feeling for her he would never forgive himself. Besides hamtaro had looked very serious when he said that. Sandy looked at him like the big, fat, ugly, and queer he was. Unlike the other male Ham-hams Oxnard had a special softness to him. He really was an emotional guy. Maybe emotional challenge or fucked up in the head as some people who say. Oxnard looked deep into Sandy's eyes brown and beautiful they were. Sandy leaned in and kissed the fat ugly ham- ham. Oxnard was shocked and pulled back.
Oxnard: hey I told you I am a fag.
Sandy: so you different and I like you more than the other ones.
***Meanwhile***
Hamtaro stop the fighting between Dexter and Howdy with help from Bijou. She would do anything to get close to Hamtaro. Hamtaro showed them all his big bright Kimono Laura bought for him. Bijou offer to sew it up if hamtaro would takes it off. God how she always wanted to say that. She wondered if it would sound better in French (Sorry I don't know any French so who knows) Hamtaro striped of the kimono showing off his brown and white fur. With was slick from the shower he took. It didn't matter he was a hamster and was supposed to be naked. So Hamtaro and Stan wanted to go for a walk cause they had just eaten. Stan had been sleep till the fight began. Dexter and Howdy were get the cuts and wounds cleaned and fixed.
****Not meanwhile****
Hamtaro and Stan walked along the trails Boss had made to the river. It was a cat free place. Since half of the route was underground. They were almost their still making light conversation when Hamtaro stopped dead in his tracks. Stan slammed in the back of him.
Stan: What the F.
Hamtaro pointed to a Sandy and Oxnard making out by the river. The blood ran cold in Hamtaro veins. Stan started to get tics or something cause he was shakin' and jerkin' in madness.
Hamtaro: I can't believe this shit. My so-called best friend making it with my girl.
Stan: Look at that fucking fag. He is letting her be all over him. Dude their may be humping. Some new position? Ah hell no not with my sister! Let's beat the fuck outta him. Kill the faggot Ham boy.
Hamtaro didn't wanted to watch and he didn't want to kicked Oxnard ass right now. He left in a storm back to the clubhouse. Now he was sexually frustrated. He had liked sandy first and now Oxnard was making her all loose. Would he ever get to hit that? Not now. Hamtaro knew it was time to go home anyway. He picked up his kimono from Bijou without a simple thanks and ran all the way home. He flew back to his cage on to his wheel. He kept running. He wanted to running. He wanted to forget.
Later: Laura came home around 3:00pm like always. She said goodbye to Kana. It was no time to hang out. They had a major book report due. Hamtaro was still busy at the wheel. His whole body dripping with sweat. All his muscles beg for a break. He wasn't listening to them not now, not ever. Laura turned her doorknob to step in only to see.
~*~*~*~*~ Author notes: Oh poor Hamtaro a little heart broken isn't he? What will Laura see when she opens her door? A dead hamster or a junky room? (Laughs evilly) Find out in Chapter 3 and 4. Please review.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* _ Small Buttercup
Chapter Two: A Ham-Ham day.
Laura left of school with Kana as always. While Laura's dad headed off to work. Her mother stayed home. Hamtaro still in his kimono saw his chance.
Hamtaro: It's Showtime at the clubhouse!
And with that Hamtaro did his little down the pipeline routine only this time at the end; a crack in the pipe hooked the back of his kimono. Chocking Hamtaro nearly to death! He clawed at it and was freed. Leaving a minor rip in it. He fell all the way down. And landed in Brandy's shit!
Hamtaro: Eew this is gross. (Wipes off the crap) Oh man today I should have stayed in may cage. But I want to the others to see my kimono. Brandy! Brandy!
Hamtaro called but the old dog never came. He wondered where he could have gone but headed down to the clubhouse making that stupid bada bada noise. He arrived just as the other were having lunch. Boss smelled him coming.
Boss: Damn Hamtaro who fucked you!
Sandy: Boss! Watch you language around Penelope! Please.
Boss: yeah, yeah whatever.
Hamtaro: No one didn't do anything to me; I just had a bad fall.
Boss: A shitty fall you mean.
Sandy: Boss!
Boss: anyway you know where the bathroom is. Go clean. Can't have you stinky up the place. We already have Oxnard doing that.
Boss glance at Oxnard. Which made the poor hamster blushed. Was it his fault he was a queer and the only ham-ham to even look his way twice was hamtaro? Which is why he liked him so much. It didn't matter though cause Hamtaro liked Sandy and Bijou liked Hamtaro. Sandy didn't like anyone cause she was an independent ham-ham. Just then Oxnard let out a fart one that blasted throughout the room. Boss jeered.
Boss: God damnit Oxnard get the fuck out of here! 'Fore you blow the place up. I don't wanna die of toxic shock!
Cappy and Panda took their cue and threw Oxnard outside. Sandy and the other girls sighed. Hamtaro went to the bathroom to freshen up. He cleaned his new kimono as best he could. Laura would still notices he just knew it. The smell hadn't died down by the time Hamtaro entered the living room again.
Boss: No more burnt tacos for that fat bustard! I mean it.
Howdy: Yeah he stinky more then a pack of old dog hairs. (Chuckles at his own joke.)
Dexter: yet another by joke by Howdy. The buck toothed loser!
Howdy: Shut the hell up. You fucking dork. At less I don't need no glasses.
Dexter: I know you need a life and a grammar book!
Well that started a big fight immediately. Howdy with after Dexter like a cat. Dexter bit down on Howdy's arm. Howdy punch Dexter glasses off while Dexter then started chocking Howdy with his own apron. Howdy kicked Dexter in the nuts. Both rolled around the floor with each other.
With all the other ham-hams jeering them on. Sandy had been left with Penelope. She didn't know why she hung out with all those losers. She just did. She saw Oxnard by the river edge looking at himself. Tears were running down his fat ugly face.
Sandy: Oxnard what's wrong? Why are you crying?
Oxnard: No body likes me Sandy. I'm fat and ugly and I'm a fag!
Oxnard busted into tears. 'What a faggot!' Sandy thought as she rolled her eyes. She sat by the poor gay ass hamster anyway and found it fun to comfort him.
Sandy: who said you were a faggot Oxnard?
Oxnard: Stan your brother Stan and Maxwell. They both did.
Sandy: well I'm sure you not one so it's ok. So stop crying. Ok?
Oxnard: But I am a faggot. I'm in love with Hamtaro! He the only one that showed me kindness and share sunflowers seeds with me. Besides he has a nice ass! . Oh my god! I checked out his ass. See I am a fag.
Sandy: well umm ok. so like when did you first get these feelings for Hamtaro?
Oxnard: six months ago! I can't tell him cause.
Oxnard had to stop right there. If her told sandy that Hamtaro had feeling for her he would never forgive himself. Besides hamtaro had looked very serious when he said that. Sandy looked at him like the big, fat, ugly, and queer he was. Unlike the other male Ham-hams Oxnard had a special softness to him. He really was an emotional guy. Maybe emotional challenge or fucked up in the head as some people who say. Oxnard looked deep into Sandy's eyes brown and beautiful they were. Sandy leaned in and kissed the fat ugly ham- ham. Oxnard was shocked and pulled back.
Oxnard: hey I told you I am a fag.
Sandy: so you different and I like you more than the other ones.
***Meanwhile***
Hamtaro stop the fighting between Dexter and Howdy with help from Bijou. She would do anything to get close to Hamtaro. Hamtaro showed them all his big bright Kimono Laura bought for him. Bijou offer to sew it up if hamtaro would takes it off. God how she always wanted to say that. She wondered if it would sound better in French (Sorry I don't know any French so who knows) Hamtaro striped of the kimono showing off his brown and white fur. With was slick from the shower he took. It didn't matter he was a hamster and was supposed to be naked. So Hamtaro and Stan wanted to go for a walk cause they had just eaten. Stan had been sleep till the fight began. Dexter and Howdy were get the cuts and wounds cleaned and fixed.
****Not meanwhile****
Hamtaro and Stan walked along the trails Boss had made to the river. It was a cat free place. Since half of the route was underground. They were almost their still making light conversation when Hamtaro stopped dead in his tracks. Stan slammed in the back of him.
Stan: What the F.
Hamtaro pointed to a Sandy and Oxnard making out by the river. The blood ran cold in Hamtaro veins. Stan started to get tics or something cause he was shakin' and jerkin' in madness.
Hamtaro: I can't believe this shit. My so-called best friend making it with my girl.
Stan: Look at that fucking fag. He is letting her be all over him. Dude their may be humping. Some new position? Ah hell no not with my sister! Let's beat the fuck outta him. Kill the faggot Ham boy.
Hamtaro didn't wanted to watch and he didn't want to kicked Oxnard ass right now. He left in a storm back to the clubhouse. Now he was sexually frustrated. He had liked sandy first and now Oxnard was making her all loose. Would he ever get to hit that? Not now. Hamtaro knew it was time to go home anyway. He picked up his kimono from Bijou without a simple thanks and ran all the way home. He flew back to his cage on to his wheel. He kept running. He wanted to running. He wanted to forget.
Later: Laura came home around 3:00pm like always. She said goodbye to Kana. It was no time to hang out. They had a major book report due. Hamtaro was still busy at the wheel. His whole body dripping with sweat. All his muscles beg for a break. He wasn't listening to them not now, not ever. Laura turned her doorknob to step in only to see.
~*~*~*~*~ Author notes: Oh poor Hamtaro a little heart broken isn't he? What will Laura see when she opens her door? A dead hamster or a junky room? (Laughs evilly) Find out in Chapter 3 and 4. Please review.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* _ Small Buttercup
