The Real Big Brainy

by Gary D. Snyder

Epilog:

Because Jimmy had lost his shrink ray and the Moebius cube he needed for many of his planned tricks and Jacques' reactor was gone just whose science project was the best would remain a matter of debate for quite some time. Despite that the Science Fair went on. To everyone's surprise Carl won the prize for the best project, although not for his original theme of the evolution of llamas. Instead, he won for what Principal Willoughby called "the best presentation of scientific misinterpretation and hoaxes through history" that he had ever seen. He then suggested that Carl add the Fiji Mermaid and Piltdown Man to his project next time, leaving Carl thoroughly confused and in possession of a large gold trophy.

The next day was Saturday and while officially there was no school Miss Fowl and the entire class gathered at the airport to see Jacques off. There was the usual exchange of addresses, good-byes, and well-wishing between Jacques and the students. Jimmy was one of the last to bid him farewell.

"Good-bye, Jimmy," said Jacques. "I cannot thank you enough for what you have done. I will have quite a story to share when I get home. But it appears that there are some things that man truly was not meant to understand, no?"

"Of course not," spoke up Sheen. "Haven't you met any girls yet?" Libby, standing next to Sheen, punched him in the arm. "Ow! See?" he declared, pointing accusingly at Libby.

"I'm sure that you'll get it right when the right time comes," replied Jimmy, shaking Jacques hand. "If you ever need a hand, feel free to drop Cindy or me a line. We'd be happy to help."

"I appreciate that, my friend. Many thanks again." With that, he turned to Cindy. "I think I shall miss you most of all. Perhaps, someday, you can visit me in France?"

Cindy blushed and demurred, "Well, maybe. Someday. One never knows. But if not, we'll always have Retroville."

At this Jacques leaned forward as if to kiss her again, but Cindy leaned backwards and turned her head slightly at his approach. "Thank you, Jacques," she said, "but I think I'd like to keep my options open. I mean, you never know who I might meet by the time I'm twelve."

"See?" exclaimed Sheen, pointing at Cindy. Libby punched him again.

Jacques nodded in understanding. "Yes, I understand. C'est la femme. I am sure that someone quite deserving will come for you someday, never fear." With that he gave a quick glance at Jimmy, who was pantomiming sticking a finger down his throat. "Or perhaps he already has. Remember what I said."

Cindy looked at Jimmy, and then quickly looked away before either Jimmy or Jacques could read her expression.

Jacques smiled. "But for now, au revoir, mon petite cheri! Perhaps some day I shall be back, and then, who can say? Good-bye, everyone! I shall remember you all!" And with that, amidst a chorus of "good-byes" and "bon voyages", he was gone.

Libby sighed. "There goes one nice guy," she said, watching Jacques until the last moment he was still in view.

"Yeah. Pretty nice," agreed Cindy, also watching.

Sheen couldn't stand it. "Hey, Libby," he said, "you know that next year there's going to be a dance. If you haven't, like, already made plans, would you go with me?"

Libby sighed, but somehow differently from how she had sighed just before. "I suppose you'd be better than nothing."

"Yes!" cried Sheen in bliss. "Finally, something that I'm better than! I – hey, wait a minute," he added, thinking. "Is nothing something? Because if it is, why do they call it nothing?"

"Then again, maybe I'll go stag," Libby remarked as she started walking away.

Sheen followed her. "No, wait! Don't do that. My dad has been teaching me all these cool dances from when he was young. You know – the Funky Chicken, and the Bump, and don't forget the Ultra Lambada…"

"Or maybe I won't go at all!" Libby said, just as she and Sheen passed out of earshot.

The other students began filing away as well and soon Cindy and Jimmy were the only students left. "I wanted to tell you how sorry I am, Jimmy," Cindy said after a moment.

"Sorry?" Jimmy sounded surprised. "Sorry for what?"

It was hard to say, but Cindy got it out. "Sorry for treating you so badly this past week. I mean, I know that Jacques is so nice, and continental…"

"Uh-huh."

"…and suave, and romantic…"

"Yeah," said Jimmy, wishing that Cindy would get to the point.

"…and tall, and good-looking…"

"Okay, okay! I get the point!" Jimmy interrupted vehemently.

"But that really wasn't the point," Cindy hastened to say. "The real reason was because I wanted you to feel the way I felt when you became the smartest kid in school instead of me. It hurt a long time when that happened, and it took me a long time to forget about it. The problem was I forgot just how badly it would hurt you until yesterday when you thought I'd taken your energy cell. I'm so sorry." She paused, collecting her thoughts and then went on. "But I'll never forget the most amazing thing you did yesterday."

"Oh. You mean when I collapsed the breeder reaction into a singularity and saved the world."

"No. Not that."

"Then you must mean when I escaped the singularity through the Einstein-Rosen bridge."

Cindy shook her head again. "No. Not that either."

Jimmy was puzzled. "Then what?"

Cindy took a deep breath and then dove in. "The most amazing thing was, after everything I'd done, you still came back just because I asked you to believe me. That was the most amazing thing ever."

That Goddard is one smart dog, Jimmy thought, and smiled. "Well, actually, I never did do my most amazing trick." Cindy looked at him curiously. Looking very mysterious, Jimmy made a few mystical gestures and instantly a long-stemmed red rose appeared in his hand. This he gave to Cindy.

"Jimmy! Thanks," she said. She sniffed the flower. "How ever did you do that?"

"Aw, it's nothing, really. All you need to do is palm a few germ cells and use a portable time accelerator to speed up the metabolic processes."

Cindy rolled her eyes and began walking off. "Leave it to you to suck all the magic out of a romantic moment."

"I told you," Jimmy answered as he walked with her, "there's no such thing as magic."

"Especially when you're around, Neutron," Cindy sniped.

"And what's that supposed to mean, Vortex?" Jimmy demanded

"That you couldn't just once leave the science behind and go with the moment, you big jerk, that's what!" Cindy shot back.

"Well, then I guess you'll just have to go to the dance next year by yourself!" Jimmy retorted hotly.

"Well, who said I'd go with you?"

"Well, who said I'd ask?"

"You just said that –"

"I never said anything –"

Miss Fowl watched them until their argument faded into the distance. "It looks as though things are back to normal," she observed, then heaved a deep sigh. "Oh, how I miss Bolbi! Clap, clap, clap! Slap, slap, slap! Clap, clap, clap…"

THE END

Author's Notes:

When I first started writing this story I knew I had to try to make Jacques a fairly likeable guy. First of all I didn't want to have people think that I don't like people from France, although I did have some fun coming up with his name. From the viewpoint of the story, if he was a jerk there was no way that Cindy would ever consider him in a romantic light so that he would be Jimmy's romantic as well as intellectual rival. That would have made Cindy would look far too manipulative in having him try to show up Jimmy.

I enjoy writing epilogs, even more than the climax of the story and denouement. With the conflicts and problems resolved I can tie up some loose ends, have fun with the characters, and drop a hint or two about the way things are headed. I never try to nail things down too firmly because first, I don't own the charactes, and second, I'd like people to decide what happens afterwards themselves. That's really where the fun is. I hope whoever reads this had and will continue to have a fun ride.