Song Fic: I Try by Macy Gray Disclaimer- McG and Josh Schwartz own the O.C., I just wish I did.

A/N: This has turned into more of just a fic. So I may not be putting any more of the song in. Or I might. Also, I'm out of ideas! So is probably the end of this song-fic.

"So," Ryan said, "how are you?"

Marissa turned to look at Ryan. "You know I'm nothing without you," she whispered.

"Don't say that," Ryan ordered.

"I can't help the way I feel," Marissa was hurt.

He didn't mean to hurt her. "I didn't mean to hurt you," he replied, pulling her body close to his.

"You didn't hurt me, I hurt you," Marissa spoke truthfully.

She snuggled closer to Ryan. When she was with him, she couldn't focus.

"I can't do this," Ryan jerked away from Marissa. "You don't need me. And we can't be together."

His heart was breaking into a million pieces. He didn't want to do this to her. She didn't know this though.

*I may appear to be free...*

Marissa turned to him and looked him squarely in the eye. "What are you afraid of?"

Before Ryan could answer, Marissa grabbed him and kissed him. Wow. He liked it when Marissa took charge.

"I want you," Ryan mumbled, lying back on the bed with Marissa.

*But I'm just a prisoner of your love*

Ryan and Marissa lay staring at the ceiling again. They had finally given in to their desires.

"Ryan, can I ask you something?" Marissa said.

Ryan nodded.

"What are you afraid of?"

No answer. She stared into his deep blue eyes, searching for answers.

It was then that she knew. Ryan was afraid of love. And he loved her. These were feelings that he had never felt before. She had to teach him. Slowly, he was learning. But it would take time. That was why, when she had first said those three magic words, he had responded with, "thank you."

"I love you," Ryan said quietly.

It was uncanny how he could almost read her mind.

"I was just thinking about that. Love, I mean," Marissa corrected herself, "and how powerful it is."

They drifted off to sleep. Ryan was holding Marissa and she could sleep soundly, knowing he was there to protect her.

The next morning, Marissa woke up. And realized she wasn't in her own bed.

Oh well.

She took a quick shower and turned on her cell phone.

Oh shit.

There were four messages from her dad. Demanding to know where she was.

Marissa scribbled a note to Ryan and left it on the table. God knows she didn't want to leave.

At the apartment, Jimmy wasn't actually flipping out. He figured that Marissa had spent the night at Summer's. Or Ryan's. And to tell the truth, he wasn't too worried about her staying with either of them. It was just the fact that she hadn't called him to say she would be out.

Jimmy ran to the door when he heard the doorbell ring. He opened it to find Marissa. He saw her worried face and smiled.

"I'm not mad at you sweetie. I just want to you tell me what your plans are. Where were you last night?" Jimmy said, hugging her.

"Promise you won't get mad?" He nodded. "I spent the night at Ryan's."

"Okay," Jimmy said, choosing his words carefully, "did you, um, you know?"

So much for being smooth. Marissa's face flushed. "Well, yeah," she admitted. For some reason it wasn't as embarrassing as she thought it would be.

Seeing Jimmy's face, she added, "And yeah, well, he used protection."

Jimmy sighed. "I remember what it was like to be young and in love."

When Ryan woke up, Marissa was gone. He found the note by his bed and tore it open.

Turns out Marissa had to go home. Oh well. What a night! But he missed her. And his body ached for her so badly.