Author's Note: sorry! I'm sorry for leaving the suspense go for this long, but I have a good excuse. Finals, studying for finals, and bemoaning the lack of my PotC DVD. I won't get it until my birthday, and until then, I want to hear nothing more about it. I can wait 16 more days! I have willpower! I am not obsessed. (Yeah right.)
Also, this was hard to write, and I'm glad I'm almost done with this phase of things. It's hard to be serious, intense, and suspenseful when you're listening to Christmas music. "Holly, Jolly, Christmas" just doesn't go with the dark edgyness I'm going for. Took me awhile to get into the right mindset to write this.
Winn's POV of what's going on is told in flashbacks. It's supposed to be disjointed and unrelated to the rest of the chapter. She's delirious. Sorry if that causes anyone confusion.
Anyway, enjoy this, and I will do my best to get another chapter out within the next four/five days.
Author Thanks at the end.
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Winn was laid moaning and thrashing on the bunk. His guards kept Jack from going to her, their rough hands reminding him of the role he was supposed to be playing. It was hard to sink into even such a carefully crafted persona as "Captain Jack Sparrow" when one of the two most important things in his life was suffering to such a degree, but Jack forced himself to do so. "Careful there, mate. If you're not a wee bit more gentle there, you'll hurt my delicate feelin's."
The guard cuffed him on the side of the head for his trouble. "Shut your mouth you blackhearted son of a bi –"
"Johnson! Are you a soldier or a school-boy?" Marcus turned from the bed, reluctantly turning his sister over to his wife to deal with his men and his brother-in-law. He couldn't remember ever seeing Winn in such bad shape. Out of all the Morgan grandchildren, she seemed to be the most resilient, the most indestructible. And her husband was in no better condition; while he appeared to be the carefree captain, there was to much control infusing his body and his eyes were haunted. "Gentlemen, I believe both my wife and her patient would be more comfortable if you left us."
"But Captain, our orders are to –"
"Your orders are what I decide they are. Unless you want to find yourselves cleaning the bilges until we reach port, I suggest you keep that in mind."
"But Sparrow, sir –" The man's partner bumped Jack into him, making the man shut his mouth.
Marcus looked appraisingly at Jack, taking in his appearance with level eyes. "If I'm not mistaken, Mister Sparrow has not only been clapped in irons, but he's had all his weapons confiscated. It I cannot maintain order under these circumstances, then I must have gained my rank by default." The two redcoats were looking more and more shamefaced by the moment. "Now, if you are through making objections, I would appreciate it if you would position yourselves outside my cabin to await further instructions at me pleasure." The men hesitated. "Dismissed."
Once the two guards had left and the door was safely shut, Marcus relaxed and came over and clapped Jack on the shoulder, unsure of what other sign of sympathy would be appropriate under the circumstances. "I'll assume that you're far happier to see us than we are to see you."
"It's a long story, Marcus. One best told at another time. Can anythin' be done for Winn?" Jack had let his pretense fall as soon as his guards had left, and now he looked more helpless than Marcus could ever remember seeing him. "Grace?"
The woman looked up from her work, uncertainty and rage writ large on her face. "What happened?!"
Jack shook his head, clearly trying to organize his thoughts. "She was fed castor bean." His hands clenched as Winn once again cried out and Grace's face paled.
"Castor bean," she whispered. "Marcus, get me water or milk. We need to dilute whatever may be left in her stomach." Marcus went to the door and exchanged words with one of the men there. "Jack, I need to know how long she's been displaying symptoms."
"Hard to tell. It could have stated as early as last night. She was up half the night emptying her stomach and sufferin' from indigestion. But she said that it was the babe makin' her sick."
Grace cursed, startling Jack. "What business does Freddy have putting herself in a position where she could get poisoned while pregnant?"
" . . . jack . . . ." The woman on the bed interrupted them, freeing Grace from her anger for the time being and Jack from having to answer such a complicated question.
"Is she going to be alright?" Jack edged towards the bed as Winn's body once again tensed in pain. Her moans and her efforts to shield herself from the pain were growing weaker. It was an excruciating thing to watch, the lack of strength in his wife's body. Winn had always been so strong, and when she had let herself be weak, he had been there at her side, supporting her. But now, this time, all he could do was step back and let others care for her.
Grace saw his struggle in his eyes, and she felt sorry for the man. Here he was, practically surrendering himself to the British when he knew they wanted his head, and it appeared at the moment that it had been in vain. Shaking her head, she simply said, "I don't know, Jack." Rubbing her brow, she asked, "You said she had been up most of the night throwing up?" Jack nodded. "What other symptoms has she been displaying? Anything out of the ordinary."
"Umm . . ." Jack took a deep breath to compose his rampant emotions while Grace stripped Winn of her outer garments, leaving her only in her shift. "She seemed disoriented and she was having trouble focusing her eyes. And breathing hasn't been a gift either – she's been fighting for every breath." Without her voluminous layers of clothing, the bulge in her abdomen was much more noticeable.
"How long has she been bleeding?" The water that Grace was using to clean Winn up a bit was as red as dye; the sight turned Jack's stomach. He'd never been squeamish around blood before, even when Winn had been injured previously. But this was different. This blood was supposed to be keeping his child, their child, alive. "This is important, Jack. I need to know how much blood she's lost."
"An hour . . . perhaps closer to two."
"And she supposedly ingested the poison some time last night?"
"Aye."
Grace was silent for a moment as she thought. Shaking her head and muttering under her breath, she laid a hand on Winn's belly as another contraction squeezed the breath from her lungs. Still muttering, she felt for Winn's pulse.
"Well?" Jack couldn't contain his impatience any longer. "What say you?"
Choosing each word with extreme care, Grace slowly said, "While Freddy seems to be in pain, I don't think enough castor bean entered her system to trigger a complete miscarriage. The contractions are too weak to do anything more than cause discomfort." She saw Jack relax, and hurried to give the rest of her news. "But that doesn't mean she's out of danger, Jack. There's still the bleeding to deal with. If it can't be stopped, her body may well choose to reject the babe in order to save her life."
"She'll fight."
Grace nodded. "I know. But even if everything here turns out well, if she doesn't bleed to death and if she manages to keep the babe, she's going to have to take things easy. A minimum of walking, no climbing, no lifting anything heavier than a book, lots of bed-rest. She's not to be excited in any fashion, no bedplay, lots of sleep. If she ignores any of this, she could still lose the child. Not to mention that her body will be weak for weeks after this."
"What're you tryin' to tell me, lass? That I got her here for nothing?"
"No. I'm saying that . . . I'm saying that . . . things may not turn out happily. There's that risk. I'll do what I can to help, but most of the work is going to be up to Winn."
"She's strong enough." Jack watched as Pige crawled towards the bed on her belly, pausing at the foot and letting out a pitiful whimper.
"Is she, Jack?"
Jack knew that Grace was only trying to prepare him for the worst, but it irritated him nonetheless. "If she's not, then she's stubborn enough."
Marcus stepped in before this could scale into a full-fledge argument. "Why don't you go sit with her for a while, Jack?"
The pirate shook his head, the numerous baubles and beads braided into it clanking against each other. "I'd love to, mate, but I can't. It wouldn't do for our friends out there to label her a pirate. The only care she'd get then is a guarantee of a stay of execution." He looked away from his wife for the first time in several long minutes. "And while we're on the topic of pirates, I think it best that you don't let on that you know either of us. If the Commodore hasn't figured out your connection to Winn, I'd rather not have him informed. Too many coincidences."
"Jack, if you're asking me to hand you over to Commodore Norrington without question –" Marcus paused as Jack's dark eyes connected with his.
In a tone more serious than he had ever used in his life, Jack said, "I'm not asking, I'm telling you that this is the way it has to be, lad. I knew what my reception was to be as soon as I identified this ship as British. Don't worry. I've fallen into the Commodore's clutches before and lived to tell about it." Looking over his should towards the door, Jack quickly walked towards the bed.
"Winnie, look at me love."
Jack didn't expect a reaction to the request, but Winn heard him through the fog confusing her mind. She fought to breathe through the pain and to open her uncooperative eyelids. Gasping slightly as another wave of sensation engulfed her, she managed to whisper his name. ". . . jack . . ." Can't see. Can't see. Struggling, she managed to push the veil over her sight to the side so she could look into her husband's face. ". . . I'm sorry, Jack . . . . I didn't mean for this to happen . . . ."
"Shh, love. You've nothing to be sorry about. I need you to listen to me. Can you do that?" Time pressed down of Jack, underlining his urgency. They'd been left undisturbed for too long. Sooner or later the Commodore was going to come knocking with reinforcements. "You're with Marcus and Grace. They're going to keep you safe."
". . . don't leave me . . . ."
"I have my own work to do right now, Winnie. I need you to stay here and get better. I need to be able to depend on you to do this."
Winn was silent, staring up into her husband's eyes. For her he let the seriousness in them be displaced by anxiety, concern, love, and more than a little fear. Have to make the fear go away. I'm not supposed to scare him. ". . . alright . . . ." It was hard to get enough air to talk. ". . . love you . . . ." Her eyes slipped shut as he leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. ". . . fighting . . . ."
"I know, love. I'm so proud of you. Just keep fighting." His time was up; he could hear booted feet approaching the cabin. Briskly he walked over the wall opposite of the bunk and took up a relaxed posture. "Take care of my wife. Once she's well, then you can worry about me."
Almost before he stopped speaking, the door flung open to reveal the Commodore and several armed redcoats. "Captain Morgan, Mrs. Morgan, I'm sorry to intrude, but I believe that you've had sufficient time to question Mr. Sparrow –"
"Captain, Commodore Norrington. You forgot the 'captain.'" Jack closed his mouth at the glare that the irritated man shot him, acting repentant. "Sorry, mate. Old habits die hard."
"Men, please escort Mister Sparrow to the brig and see that he's made comfortable." If Jack weren't so worried about Winn, the way Norrington managed to talk without moving his lips would have been funny. He watched out of masked eyes as the soldiers closed in around him, wary of their intentions. If he knew anything about the English's sense of propriety and treatment of women, he was probably in for a few undeserved injuries. However, before the men could reach him, Jack found himself being zealously defended by Pige. The dog was growling deep in her throat and had her hackles up, every inch of her the apparent killer.
The redcoats halted their advance, unsure of what to do. Jack simply stayed leaning against the wall, not bothering to rein the dog in. He didn't think that Pigeon would attack without being told to, and it was good for these military types to remember that not everyone was awed by the untold might of the British empire.
"Whose dog is that," demanded the Commodore, eying Jack sourly as if he suspected he man of deliberately trying to cause him a headache.
Jack shrugged. "It came with the wench, so I'll assume it's hers."
"You're asking me to believe that the pet of someone who has, to all appearances, met with foul play, is defending the one person under suspicion of harming its mistress?"
"Nah, I'm simply saying that perhaps I've managed to win the mutt over."
"Mister Sparrow, it would please me to no end if you could managed to keep such comments to yourself."
"Get used to disappointment, mate. It's seems as if we may be stuck with each other for some time, unless you've changed your mind and are about to let me go." Jack looked away from the other man when he saw a blur move out of the corner of his eye. One of the soldiers had gotten too close for Pige's comfort, and she lunged forward, snapping at his ankle.
"Pigeon!" All the men turned to stare at Grace, Jack with a warning in his eyes. Pige was a good dog and would obey anyone she was familiar with, but he didn't need the good Commodore wondering why a strange dog would listen to a stranger. It was too late though, Pige broke off her attack to watch Grace uncertainly, whining anxiously.
"Mrs. Morgan, how –"
Grace quickly interrupted the Commodore. "The dog's name is on her collar. Come here, Pigeon." Reluctantly, the dog obeyed, coming to sit at the woman's feet. She butted her head against Grace's hip as if in apology, but never took her eyes off the men threatening her mistress' mate. Grace was smart enough to figure out that the dog may still bolt, so she wrapped her hand around the mutt's collar. "Really, if you're about to brawl you need to take it outside. All this noise and hostility isn't good for my patient." Jack wondered if anyone would fall for that.
Winn was laying quietly on the bunk, pale as alabaster, her chest barely rising and falling. Grace never said anything about Winn dying because she couldn't breathe. Ignoring the men around them, Jack thought to his wife, Com'on Winnie, breathe. Once more breath, love, just one more. As if she could hear him, Winn's chest slowly rose and fell before pausing. Again, love. Another slow breath, then another, and another. Jack relaxed fractionally when he realized that she wasn't about to stop breathing any time soon. That's my girl. Fight, Winn. Never realizing that his arms had been seized by two soldiers, he concentrated on Winn. Just keep breathing, love. Let someone else take care of the rest.
"Come along, you," one of the soldiers growled, jerking on the chain connecting Jack's wrists. The metal bracelets dug into his skin painfully, but Jack fought the urge to resist. Right now things depended with him going along with these men painfully. He was a pirate, a man who had no concern for anything but his ship and his own well-being. He needed to placate, not irritate, and keep his eyes open for any opportunity to escape. Somewhere in the back of his head, he heard himself telling Will, "May I ask you something? Have I ever given you reason not to trust me? Do us a favor, I know it's difficult for you but please stay here . . . and try not to do anything stupid." Jack hoped he could follow his own advice.
Pain. Pain, and more pain, and a weight crushing her chest so she couldn't breathe, and darkness every time she opened her eyes.
The dreams wouldn't stop. Winn wanted nothing more to wake up and discover what was going on around her, but she couldn't shake the dreams' hold on her. Once after another, memories paraded through her mind, reminding her of everything that had happened to her in the past four years.
"Don't even be considering such a thing, Winnie. Tortuga is no Port Royal. A woman like you'd be on her back within minutes of setting foot on the dock. You are to remain here, do you understand me?"
"While I find your concern for my safety touching, perhaps even heartwarming, I find your lack of faith in my abilities to be rather disappointing." Even then she had wanted to be taken seriously, had wanted to prove that she wasn't weak. And even then, Jack had been concerned for her safety, even when he didn't have a good reason to be. Things shifted before she could remember more, and another conversation rose in her mind.
"Winnie? You think I'm charming?"
Taking a long look at him, head to toes, then meeting his eyes, Winn replied slowly, "I think you're too charming for the good of most women, Captain."
"So you do think I'm charming." Jack was doing that thing with his voice again, teasing her in a way that begged her to lose all semblance of composure. It was working better than it usually did, Winn noted. It must be because I'm tired.
Swallowing and turning her head, Winn answered, "I think I will strive not to be most women." And she wasn't most women. She was the one, the one woman who had managed to catch Jack Sparrow's interest for good. The memory faded to give way to another.
"So this grandfather of yours just lives on this island doing nothing but counting his money and arguing with his wife, if she's anything like you that is. That sounds like a rather good reason for pirates to grow old." He had no idea. Winn wanted nothing more than to grow old with her husband, to be able to argue with him, and yell at him, and stomp away from him every day for the rest of her life if the mood so struck her.
"If we may go downstairs to dinner before the food goes cold?"
"Not so fast. I still seem to detect a grievous imbalance of pretty women."
"Here, take Elizabeth." Both Jack and Elizabeth were about to protest this pairing, but Will ignored them. "She should be relatively safe in your company. I'm not so sure about Winn." No. Will had been wrong. She was always safe when Jack was with her. But where was he now? Why couldn't she find him.
"Now do you understand, Captain Sparrow? Do you see why I fight to keep myself apart? Do you see that no matter how I wish things were different, that they can't be because I can't change?"
Smoothing his thumbs over her cheekbones, Jack said quietly, "Come to bed, love." He held her eyes with his, hoping that she had heard the difference in a name he constantly called her.
Winn stood looking up at him for no more than an instant before the tears in her eyes spilled over. She slumped into him, burying her head in his neck as sobs started wracking her body. That night, that night that he had accepted her despite all the doubts she had about herself had been the first night she had admitted that he had come to mean something to her. Something more than simply a man she could love. She had realized he was the man she wanted to love. She had held onto him all that night, letting him support her as waves of emotional pain had wracked her body. But where was he now? She hurt and he wasn't here holding her.
"Stop thrashing, Freddy. You're going to make things worse if you don't lie still." Winn obeyed the voice because she could feel the pain in her abdominal muscles, sharps stabs of pain interspersed with waves of weakness. Calming, Winn let the dreams take her again.
"You. I want you. I need you, Winnie. I don't know why, and I can't begin to comprehend how I came to need an ornery, stubborn, hot-tempered woman anymore than I think you can. But the truth is the same." His voice, which was already low, took on a decisive and decidedly possessive tone. "You're mine, Winnie. I never would have agreed to a wedding if I hadn't decided that long ago." And when he had confirmed that he wanted to be with her as much as she needed to be with him, her heart had both flown and fell – but it had been alright because he had been there.
Jack . . . where are you? I'm so tired.
"I know, love. I'm so proud of you. Just keep fighting."
"I can't, Jack . . . . I'm so tired."
". . . fight . . . ." It was almost as if he were in the room with her. Winn set her mind to fighting the waves of pain that were slowly fading. Jack was proud of her. He loved her. If he thought she could fight, she would. And she would win.
"Jack?" Marcus had finally found the opportunity to come down and talk with his brother-in-law. For the past several hours he had been kept busy directing his men and listening to the story that Norrington had gotten from Jack. That had been the worst part – sitting and listening to a complete confabulation when all he wanted to do was go down to the brig himself and get the real story. "Jack." His sister's husband was sitting against the wall, legs drawn up to his chest, arms carelessly draped over his knees.
"How's Winnie?" Jack tilted his head up to study his wife's brother.
Marcus had to hold back a groan when he saw Jack's face. His lower lip was split and his left eye had been blackened. "Don't tell me that the Commodore condoned that."
Jack's lips twitched in an aborted smile. "No, this was a gift from two of your men before the good Commodore arrived below decks. Not that I blame the men. If I had caught anyone with Winn while she was in such a state, I'd probably leave them in a worse state. It's not their fault that they're quick to think the worst of a pirate." Taking a deep breath, he repeated his original question, "How's Winn?"
"Holding her own. The worst of it seems to have passed, but Grace is worried about the child. Its being rather active for having almost been miscarried."
"If Winn were awake, she'd say it was a good sign."
"If my sister was awake, she'd be saying almost anything to put your mind at ease." Marcus looked around for a seat. Spying an abandoned crate, he pulled it over to the bars of Jack's cell. "Now, what are the two of you doing out here? The last we heard, you'd just made a successful raid on a Spanish galleon in the Keyes, and Winn wrote that she was planning to make an appearance in Port Royal to visit us and the Turners."
Jack shrugged. "Tell me, do you remember anything important happenin' to Winn about eleven years ago?"
Marcus had to stop and think before answering, "Yes. She came home injured from a raid gone sour. Almost died according to Grandfather and the doctors. However, her first mate assured us that the man who had shot her was dead."
"Aye. He died. Unfortunately, the same couldn't be said of his endearing family." Quickly and without embellishment, Jack told their story from the time when the Pearl had attacked the derelict ship to how he'd fallen into Gandolfi's hands, to Winn's appearance to rescue him.
"Blasted woman still doesn't know when to let others take care of things." Jack closed his eyes and rested his head against the hull of the ship. "I still can't believe that she came after me while nearly five months pregnant, and I can't forgive Gandolfi for what he did." Can't forgive myself either. I should have been more careful, should have made her be more careful.
Silence reigned for several minutes before Marcus cleared his throat. Jack raised his head and looked at him, seeing how uncomfortable the man was. "Spit it out lad. I doubt anything you have to say can make the circumstances worse."
"Jack . . . ."
"If you're looking for a polite way to tell me that Norrington is out for my neck, you can stop wasting your breath. The man made it extremely clear what he thought of my story, and what he believes really happened. Luckily for me, he'll wait for conformation from Winn before he hangs me for attempted murder, and unfortunately for him, it'll be another week before Grace lets him talk to her."
"Jack, how can you be so calm about this?"
"Because Norrington and I want the same thing – the head of the man who would attempt to murder an unborn child and its mother. We just have a difference of opinion over who's responsible. How can I be upset with a man who takes my wife under his care when he doesn't even know her?"
"He's determined to see you hanged this time, Jack."
"Doesn't matter, lad. I'm more determined to kill Gandolfi. We'll just have to work our way around the hangman's noose."
"He's not only going to have you watched around the clock, but the Turners as well. How can you be so confident of eluding the Crown's justice this time. Even if Norrington believes Freddy, he's got a rather stunning array of other crimes to hang you for."
"You're forgetting one thing, Marcus." As the man watched his pirate kin, he saw a light come to his eyes that had been missing since he'd come aboard with his wife. "I have two oaths to see carried out. One to my wife, one to my enemy." Stretching his legs out, he continued, "And if that weren't enough, then here's the reason I'm so certain. I'm Captain Jack Sparrow, pirate extraordinaire, devoted husband," a new tone entered his voice as he listed his last reason supporting his inevitable success, "and soon to be father." The tone in his voice was amazement.
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Author Thanks: jackfan2! Where are you?! I miiisss yooouuu! : )
lilitaliandragon – trust me when I say that I do not mean to turn Norrington into a jerk. He's just hard to get inside the guy's head. But I think I finally have. I knew there was more to him than the military officer, and I think you might like what I've found. Stick around to find out what I mean.
ao_hoshi
Mooney
TaraRose
pirate-miss
KawaiiRyu
mooranda
VagrantCandy
KamikazeCreamPuff
Eledhwen
Ashley – Sara passed along your e-mail. I'm so glad that you're enjoying not only my story, but hers. I swear, I love that kid – and her OUATIM fic. They both rock, and you can rock my OUATIM soundtrack. I just love new reviewers. I hope to hear from you again.
SprklingSatine
EricaDawn
my sister Theresa
Kerry
bobo3
Alej
BeBe
SuzzieQue
Arwen Lune – yay! I love hearing from you!
pirate-princess – new reviewer! You can rock my copy of "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" which, contrary to popular belief, is my favorite movie of all time, only barely beating PotC for the title.
poppet – I was trying to remember if you had reviewed back in the early days if 'Inconvenient' but was unable to find a review. So either I'm nuts or I have a horrible memory. Either way, I am so glad to hear from you, and I hope I get to again in the near future.
Clover the Sae-Beast
I'm sorry I didn't have time to do a more extensive thanks, but it's been over a week since I got the first reviews for chapter 18 and I can't remember even half of those I got for 19. Just know that I appreciate hearing from each and every one of you, that each of you are an incredible encouragement, and that I don't know if I could write a fic like this without your feedback. This really is a group effort, and I appreciate the time you take to send me reviews. Thank you all.
Sarah (aka – rythmteck)
